PrepScholar

Choose Your Test

  • Search Blogs By Category
  • College Admissions
  • AP and IB Exams
  • GPA and Coursework

My Successful Harvard Application (Complete Common App + Supplement)

author image

Other High School , College Admissions , Letters of Recommendation , Extracurriculars , College Essays

body_harvard.jpg

In 2005, I applied to college and got into every school I applied to, including Harvard, Princeton, Stanford, and MIT. I decided to attend Harvard.

In this guide, I'll show you the entire college application that got me into Harvard—page by page, word for word .

In my complete analysis, I'll take you through my Common Application, Harvard supplemental application, personal statements and essays, extracurricular activities, teachers' letters of recommendation, counselor recommendation, complete high school transcript, and more. I'll also give you in-depth commentary on every part of my application.

To my knowledge, a college application analysis like this has never been done before . This is the application guide I wished I had when I was in high school.

If you're applying to top schools like the Ivy Leagues, you'll see firsthand what a successful application to Harvard and Princeton looks like. You'll learn the strategies I used to build a compelling application. You'll see what items were critical in getting me admitted, and what didn't end up helping much at all.

Reading this guide from beginning to end will be well worth your time—you might completely change your college application strategy as a result.

First Things First

Here's the letter offering me admission into Harvard College under Early Action.

body_harvardapp_accept1.png

I was so thrilled when I got this letter. It validated many years of hard work, and I was excited to take my next step into college (...and work even harder).

I received similar successful letters from every college I applied to: Princeton, Stanford, and MIT. (After getting into Harvard early, I decided not to apply to Yale, Columbia, UChicago, UPenn, and other Ivy League-level schools, since I already knew I would rather go to Harvard.)

The application that got me admitted everywhere is the subject of this guide. You're going to see everything that the admissions officers saw.

If you're hoping to see an acceptance letter like this in your academic future, I highly recommend you read this entire article. I'll start first with an introduction to this guide and important disclaimers. Then I'll share the #1 question you need to be thinking about as you construct your application. Finally, we'll spend a lot of time going through every page of my college application, both the Common App and the Harvard Supplemental App.

Important Note: the foundational principles of my application are explored in detail in my How to Get Into Harvard guide . In this popular guide, I explain:

  • what top schools like the Ivy League are looking for
  • how to be truly distinctive among thousands of applicants
  • why being well-rounded is the kiss of death

If you have the time and are committed to maximizing your college application success, I recommend you read through my Harvard guide first, then come back to this one.

You might also be interested in my other two major guides:

  • How to Get a Perfect SAT Score / Perfect ACT Score
  • How to Get a 4.0 GPA

What's in This Harvard Application Guide?

From my student records, I was able to retrieve the COMPLETE original application I submitted to Harvard. Page by page, word for word, you'll see everything exactly as I presented it : extracurricular activities, awards and honors, personal statements and essays, and more.

In addition to all this detail, there are two special parts of this college application breakdown that I haven't seen anywhere else :

  • You'll see my FULL recommendation letters and evaluation forms. This includes recommendations from two teachers, one principal, and supplementary writers. Normally you don't get to see these letters because you waive access to them when applying. You'll see how effective strong teacher advocates will be to your college application, and why it's so important to build strong relationships with your letter writers .
  • You'll see the exact pen marks made by my Harvard admissions reader on my application . Members of admissions committees consider thousands of applications every year, which means they highlight the pieces of each application they find noteworthy. You'll see what the admissions officer considered important—and what she didn't.

For every piece of my application, I'll provide commentary on what made it so effective and my strategies behind creating it. You'll learn what it takes to build a compelling overall application.

Importantly, even though my application was strong, it wasn't perfect. I'll point out mistakes I made that I could have corrected to build an even stronger application.

Here's a complete table of contents for what we'll be covering. Each link goes directly to that section, although I'd recommend you read this from beginning to end on your first go.

Common Application

Personal Data

Educational data, test information.

  • Activities: Extracurricular, Personal, Volunteer
  • Short Answer
  • Additional Information

Academic Honors

Personal statement, teacher and counselor recommendations.

  • Teacher Letter #1: AP Chemistry
  • Teacher Letter #2: AP English Lang

School Report

  • Principal Recommendation

Harvard Application Supplement

  • Supplement Form
  • Writing Supplement Essay

Supplementary Recommendation #1

Supplementary recommendation #2, supplemental application materials.

Final Advice for You

I mean it—you'll see literally everything in my application.

In revealing my teenage self, some parts of my application will be pretty embarrassing (you'll see why below). But my mission through my company PrepScholar is to give the world the most helpful resources possible, so I'm publishing it.

One last thing before we dive in—I'm going to anticipate some common concerns beforehand and talk through important disclaimers so that you'll get the most out of this guide.

body_warning.jpg

Important Disclaimers

My biggest caveat for you when reading this guide: thousands of students get into Harvard and Ivy League schools every year. This guide tells a story about one person and presents one archetype of a strong applicant. As you'll see, I had a huge academic focus, especially in science ( this was my Spike ). I'm also irreverent and have a strong, direct personality.

What you see in this guide is NOT what YOU need to do to get into Harvard , especially if you don't match my interests and personality at all.

As I explain in my Harvard guide , I believe I fit into one archetype of a strong applicant—the "academic superstar" (humor me for a second, I know calling myself this sounds obnoxious). There are other distinct ways to impress, like:

  • being world-class in a non-academic talent
  • achieving something difficult and noteworthy—building a meaningful organization, writing a novel
  • coming from tremendous adversity and performing remarkably well relative to expectations

Therefore, DON'T worry about copying my approach one-for-one . Don't worry if you're taking a different number of AP courses or have lower test scores or do different extracurriculars or write totally different personal statements. This is what schools like Stanford and Yale want to see—a diversity in the student population!

The point of this guide is to use my application as a vehicle to discuss what top colleges are looking for in strong applicants. Even though the specific details of what you'll do are different from what I did, the principles are the same. What makes a candidate truly stand out is the same, at a high level. What makes for a super strong recommendation letter is the same. The strategies on how to build a cohesive, compelling application are the same.

There's a final reason you shouldn't worry about replicating my work—the application game has probably changed quite a bit since 2005. Technology is much more pervasive, the social issues teens care about are different, the extracurricular activities that are truly noteworthy have probably gotten even more advanced. What I did might not be as impressive as it used to be. So focus on my general points, not the specifics, and think about how you can take what you learn here to achieve something even greater than I ever did.

With that major caveat aside, here are a string of smaller disclaimers.

I'm going to present my application factually and be 100% straightforward about what I achieved and what I believed was strong in my application. This is what I believe will be most helpful for you. I hope you don't misinterpret this as bragging about my accomplishments. I'm here to show you what it took for me to get into Harvard and other Ivy League schools, not to ask for your admiration. So if you read this guide and are tempted to dismiss my advice because you think I'm boasting, take a step back and focus on the big picture—how you'll improve yourself.

This guide is geared toward admissions into the top colleges in the country , often with admissions rates below 10%. A sample list of schools that fit into this: Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Stanford, Columbia, MIT, UChicago, Duke, UPenn, CalTech, Johns Hopkins, Dartmouth, Northwestern, Brown. The top 3-5 in that list are especially looking for the absolute best students in the country , since they have the pick of the litter.

Admissions for these selective schools works differently from schools with >20% rates. For less selective schools, having an overall strong, well-rounded application is sufficient for getting in. In particular, having an above average GPA and test scores goes the majority of the way toward getting you admission to those schools. The higher the admission rate, the more emphasis will be placed on your scores. The other pieces I'll present below—personal statements, extracurriculars, recommendations—will matter less.

Still, it doesn't hurt to aim for a stronger application. To state the obvious, an application strong enough to get you Columbia will get you into UCLA handily.

In my application, I've redacted pieces of my application for privacy reasons, and one supplementary recommendation letter at the request of the letter writer. Everything else is unaltered.

Throughout my application, we can see marks made by the admissions officer highlighting and circling things of note (you'll see the first example on the very first page). I don't have any other applications to compare these to, so I'm going to interpret these marks as best I can. For the most part, I assume that whatever he underlines or circles is especially important and noteworthy —points that he'll bring up later in committee discussions. It could also be that the reader got bored and just started highlighting things, but I doubt this.

Finally, I co-founded and run a company called PrepScholar . We create online SAT/ACT prep programs that adapt to you and your strengths and weaknesses . I believe we've created the best prep program available, and if you feel you need to raise your SAT/ACT score, then I encourage you to check us out . I want to emphasize that you do NOT need to buy a prep program to get a great score , and the advice in this guide has little to do with my company. But if you're aren't sure how to improve your score and agree with our unique approach to SAT/ACT prep, our program may be perfect for you.

With all this past us, let's get started.

body_very_important.jpeg

The #1 Most Important College Application Question: What Is Your PERSONAL NARRATIVE?

If you stepped into an elevator with Yale's Dean of Admissions and you had ten seconds to describe yourself and why you're interesting, what would you say?

This is what I call your PERSONAL NARRATIVE. These are the three main points that represent who you are and what you're about . This is the story that you tell through your application, over and over again. This is how an admissions officer should understand you after just glancing through your application. This is how your admissions officer will present you to the admissions committee to advocate for why they should accept you.

The more unique and noteworthy your Personal Narrative is, the better. This is how you'll stand apart from the tens of thousands of other applicants to your top choice school. This is why I recommend so strongly that you develop a Spike to show deep interest and achievement. A compelling Spike is the core of your Personal Narrative.

Well-rounded applications do NOT form compelling Personal Narratives, because "I'm a well-rounded person who's decent at everything" is the exact same thing every other well-rounded person tries to say.

Everything in your application should support your Personal Narrative , from your course selection and extracurricular activities to your personal statements and recommendation letters. You are a movie director, and your application is your way to tell a compelling, cohesive story through supporting evidence.

Yes, this is overly simplistic and reductionist. It does not represent all your complexities and your 17 years of existence. But admissions offices don't have the time to understand this for all their applicants. Your PERSONAL NARRATIVE is what they will latch onto.

Here's what I would consider my Personal Narrative (humor me since I'm peacocking here):

1) A science obsessive with years of serious research work and ranked 6 th in a national science competition, with future goals of being a neuroscientist or physician

2) Balanced by strong academic performance in all subjects (4.0 GPA and perfect test scores, in both humanities and science) and proficiency in violin

3) An irreverent personality who doesn't take life too seriously, embraces controversy, and says what's on his mind

These three elements were the core to my application. Together they tell a relatively unique Personal Narrative that distinguishes me from many other strong applicants. You get a surprisingly clear picture of what I'm about. There's no question that my work in science was my "Spike" and was the strongest piece of my application, but my Personal Narrative included other supporting elements, especially a description of my personality.

body_mad_scientist.png

My College Application, at a High Level

Drilling down into more details, here's an overview of my application.

  • This put me comfortably in the 99 th percentile in the country, but it was NOT sufficient to get me into Harvard by itself ! Because there are roughly 4 million high school students per year, the top 1 percentile still has 40,000 students. You need other ways to set yourself apart.
  • Your Spike will most often come from your extracurriculars and academic honors, just because it's hard to really set yourself apart with your coursework and test scores.
  • My letters of recommendation were very strong. Both my recommending teachers marked me as "one of the best they'd ever taught." Importantly, they corroborated my Personal Narrative, especially regarding my personality. You'll see how below.
  • My personal statements were, in retrospect, just satisfactory. They represented my humorous and irreverent side well, but they come across as too self-satisfied. Because of my Spike, I don't think my essays were as important to my application.

Finally, let's get started by digging into the very first pages of my Common Application.

body_harvardapp_commonapp.jpg

There are a few notable points about how simple questions can actually help build a first impression around what your Personal Narrative is.

First, notice the circle around my email address. This is the first of many marks the admissions officer made on my application. The reason I think he circled this was that the email address I used is a joke pun on my name . I knew it was risky to use this vs something like [email protected], but I thought it showed my personality better (remember point #3 about having an irreverent personality in my Personal Narrative).

Don't be afraid to show who you really are, rather than your perception of what they want. What you think UChicago or Stanford wants is probably VERY wrong, because of how little information you have, both as an 18-year-old and as someone who hasn't read thousands of applications.

(It's also entirely possible that it's a formality to circle email addresses, so I don't want to read too much into it, but I think I'm right.)

Second, I knew in high school that I wanted to go into the medical sciences, either as a physician or as a scientist. I was also really into studying the brain. So I listed both in my Common App to build onto my Personal Narrative.

In the long run, both predictions turned out to be wrong. After college, I did go to Harvard Medical School for the MD/PhD program for 4 years, but I left to pursue entrepreneurship and co-founded PrepScholar . Moreover, in the time I did actually do research, I switched interests from neuroscience to bioengineering/biotech.

Colleges don't expect you to stick to career goals you stated at the age of 18. Figuring out what you want to do is the point of college! But this doesn't give you an excuse to avoid showing a preference. This early question is still a chance to build that Personal Narrative.

Thus, I recommend AGAINST "Undecided" as an area of study —it suggests a lack of flavor and is hard to build a compelling story around. From your high school work thus far, you should at least be leaning to something, even if that's likely to change in the future.

Finally, in the demographic section there is a big red A, possibly for Asian American. I'm not going to read too much into this. If you're a notable minority, this is where you'd indicate it.

Now known as: Education

body_harvardapp_education.png

This section was straightforward for me. I didn't take college courses, and I took a summer chemistry class at a nearby high school because I didn't get into the lottery at my school that year (I refer to this briefly in my 4.0 GPA guide ).

The most notable point of this section: the admissions officer circled Principal here . This is notable because our school Principal only wrote letters for fewer than 10 students each year. Counselors wrote letters for the other hundreds of students in my class, which made my application stand out just a little.

I'll talk more about this below, when I share the Principal's recommendation.

(In the current Common Application, the Education section also includes Grades, Courses, and Honors. We'll be covering each of those below).

Now known as: Testing

body_harvardapp_testing.png

Back then AP scores weren't part of this section, but I'll take them from another part of my application here.

body_harvardapp_testingaps.png

However, their standards are still very high. You really do want to be in that top 1 percentile to pass the filter. A 1400 on the SAT IS going to put you at a disadvantage because there are so many students scoring higher than you. You'll really have to dig yourself out of the hole with an amazing application.

I talk about this a lot more in my Get into Harvard guide (sorry to keep linking this, but I really do think it's an important guide for you to read).

Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points or your ACT score by 4 points?   We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download them for free now:

Let's end this section with some personal notes.

Even though math and science were easy for me, I had to put in serious effort to get an 800 on the Reading section of the SAT . As much as I wish I could say it was trivial for me, it wasn't. I learned a bunch of strategies and dissected the test to get to a point where I understood the test super well and reliably earned perfect scores.

I cover the most important points in my How to Get a Perfect SAT Score guide , as well as my 800 Guides for Reading , Writing , and Math .

Between the SAT and ACT, the SAT was my primary focus, but I decided to take the ACT for fun. The tests were so similar that I scored a 36 Composite without much studying. Having two test scores is completely unnecessary —you get pretty much zero additional credit. Again, with one test score, you have already passed their filter.

Finally, class finals or state-required exams are a breeze if you get a 5 on the corresponding AP tests .

Now known as: Family (still)

This section asks for your parent information and family situation. There's not much you can do here besides report the facts.

body_harvardapp_family.png

I'm redacting a lot of stuff again for privacy reasons.

The reader made a number of marks here for occupation and education. There's likely a standard code for different types of occupations and schools.

If I were to guess, I'd say that the numbers add to form some metric of "family prestige." My dad got a Master's at a middle-tier American school, but my mom didn't go to graduate school, and these sections were marked 2 and 3, respectively. So it seems higher numbers are given for less prestigious educations by your parents. I'd expect that if both my parents went to schools like Caltech and Dartmouth, there would be even lower numbers here.

This makes me think that the less prepared your family is, the more points you get, and this might give your application an extra boost. If you were the first one in your family to go to college, for example, you'd be excused for having lower test scores and fewer AP classes. Schools really do care about your background and how you performed relative to expectations.

In the end, schools like Harvard say pretty adamantly they don't use formulas to determine admissions decisions, so I wouldn't read too much into this. But this can be shorthand to help orient an applicant's family background.

body_harvardapp_activ.jpg

Extracurricular, Personal, and Volunteer Activities

Now known as: Activities

For most applicants, your Extracurriculars and your Academic Honors will be where you develop your Spike and where your Personal Narrative shines through. This was how my application worked.

body_harvardapp_activities1.png

Just below I'll describe the activities in more detail, but first I want to reflect on this list.

As instructed, my extracurriculars were listed in the order of their interest to me. The current Common App doesn't seem to ask for this, but I would still recommend it to focus your reader's attention.

The most important point I have to make about my extracurriculars: as you go down the list, there is a HUGE drop in the importance of each additional activity to the overall application. If I were to guess, I assign the following weights to how much each activity contributed to the strength of my activities section:

Research Science Institute 2004

75%

Jisan Research Institute

10%

Pasadena Young Musicians Orchestra

6%

Science Olympiad/Science Bowl/Math Team

4%

City of Hope Medical Center

1%

Pre-Medicine Club

1%

Hospital Quartet Performances

1%

Chemistry Club

1%

In other words, participating in the Research Science Institute (RSI) was far more important than all of my other extracurriculars, combined. You can see that this was the only activity my admissions reader circled.

You can see how Spike-y this is. The RSI just completely dominates all my other activities.

The reason for this is the prestige of RSI. As I noted earlier, RSI was (and likely still is) the most prestigious research program for high school students in the country, with an admission rate of less than 5% . Because the program was so prestigious and selective, getting in served as a big confirmation signal of my academic quality.

In other words, the Harvard admissions reader would likely think, "OK, if this very selective program has already validated Allen as a top student, I'm inclined to believe that Allen is a top student and should pay special attention to him."

Now, it took a lot of prior work to even get into RSI because it's so selective. I had already ranked nationally in the Chemistry Olympiad (more below), and I had done a lot of prior research work in computer science (at Jisan Research Institute—more about this later). But getting into RSI really propelled my application to another level.

Because RSI was so important and was such a big Spike, all my other extracurriculars paled in importance. The admissions officer at Princeton or MIT probably didn't care at all that I volunteered at a hospital or founded a high school club .

body_spike.png

This is a good sign of developing a strong Spike. You want to do something so important that everything else you do pales in comparison to it. A strong Spike becomes impossible to ignore.

In contrast, if you're well-rounded, all your activities hold equal weight—which likely means none of them are really that impressive (unless you're a combination of Olympic athlete, internationally-ranked science researcher, and New York Times bestselling author, but then I'd call you unicorn because you don't exist).

Apply this concept to your own interests—what can be so impressive and such a big Spike that it completely overshadows all your other achievements?

This might be worth spending a disproportionate amount of time on. As I recommend in my Harvard guide and 4.0 GPA guide , smartly allocating your time is critical to your high school strategy.

In retrospect, one "mistake" I made was spending a lot of time on the violin. Each week I spent eight hours on practice and a lesson and four hours of orchestra rehearsals. This amounted to over 1,500 hours from freshman to junior year.

The result? I was pretty good, but definitely nowhere near world-class. Remember, there are thousands of orchestras and bands in the country, each with their own concertmasters, drum majors, and section 1 st chairs.

If I were to optimize purely for college applications, I should have spent that time on pushing my spike even further —working on more Olympiad competitions, or doing even more hardcore research.

Looking back I don't mind this much because I generally enjoyed my musical training and had a mostly fun time in orchestra (and I had a strong Spike anyway). But this problem can be a lot worse for well-rounded students who are stretched too thin.

body_upstairs.jpg

Aside from these considerations about a Spike, I have two major caveats.

First, developing a Spike requires continuous, increasingly ambitious foundational work. It's like climbing a staircase. From the beginning of high school, each step was more and more ambitious—my first academic team, my first research experience, leading up to state and national competitions and more serious research work.

So when I suggest devoting a lot of time to developing your Spike, it's not necessarily the Spike in itself—it's also spending time on foundational work leading up to what will be your major achievement. That's why I don't see my time with academic teams or volunteering as wasted, even though in the end they didn't contribute as much to my application.

Second, it is important to do things you enjoy. I still enjoyed playing the violin and being part of an orchestra, and I really enjoyed my school's academic teams, even though we never went beyond state level. Even if some activities don't contribute as much to your application, it's still fine to spend some time on them—just don't delude yourself into thinking they're stronger than they really are and overspend time on them.

Finally, note that most of my activities were pursued over multiple years. This is a good sign of commitment—rather than hopping from activity year to year, it's better to show sustained commitment, as this is a better signal of genuine passion.

In a future article, I'll break down these activities in more detail. But this guide is already super long, so I want to focus our attention on the main points.

Short Answer: Extracurricular Activities

In today's Common Application, you have 50 characters to describe "Position/Leadership description and organization name" and 150 characters for "Please describe this activity, including what you accomplished and any recognition you received, etc."

Back then, we didn't have as much space per activity, and instead had a short answer question.

The Short Answer prompt:

Please describe which of your activities (extracurricular and personal activities or work experience) has been most meaningful and why.

I chose RSI as my most significant activity for two reasons—one based on the meaning of the work, and another on the social aspect.

body_harvardapp_short.png

It's obvious that schools like Yale and UChicago want the best students in the world that they can get their hands on. Academic honors and awards are a great, quantifiable way to show that.

Here's the complete list of Academic Honors I submitted. The Common Application now limits you to five honors only (probably because they got tired of lists like these), but chances are you capture the top 98% of your honors with the top five.

body_harvardapp_honors.png

body_goldenticket.jpg

Charlie wins a Golden Ticket to Harvard.

I know this is intimidating if you don't already have a prestigious honor. But remember there are thousands of nationally-ranked people in a multitude of honor types, from science competitions to essay contests to athletics to weird talents.

And I strongly believe the #1 differentiator of high school students who achieve things is work ethic, NOT intelligence or talent. Yes, you need a baseline level of competence to get places, but people far undervalue the progress they can make if they work hard and persevere. Far too many people give up too quickly or fatigue without putting in serious effort.

If you're stuck thinking, "well I'm just an average person, and there's no way I'm going to become world-class in anything," then you've already lost before you've begun. The truth is everyone who achieves something of note puts in an incredible amount of hard work. Because this is invisible to you, it looks like talent is what distinguishes the two of you, when really it's much more often diligence.

I talk a lot more about the Growth Mindset in my How To Get a 4.0 GPA guide .

So my Chemistry Olympiad honor formed 90% of the value of this page. Just like extracurriculars, there's a quick dropoff in value of each item after that.

My research work took up the next two honors, one a presentation at an academic conference, and the other (Siemens) a research competition for high school researchers.

The rest of my honors were pretty middling:

  • National Merit Scholarship semifinalist pretty much equates to PSAT score, which is far less important than your SAT/ACT score. So I didn't really get any credit for this, and you won't either.
  • In Science Olympiad (this is a team-based competition that's not as prestigious as the academic Olympiads I just talked about), I earned a number of 1 st place state and regional medals, but we never made it to nationals.
  • I was mediocre at competition math because I didn't train for it, and I won some regional awards but nothing amazing. This is one place I would have spent more time, maybe in the time I'd save by not practicing violin as much. There are great resources for this type of training, like Art of Problem Solving , that I didn't know existed and could've helped me rank much higher.

At the risk of beating a dead horse, think about how many state medalists there are in the country, in the hundreds of competitions that exist . The number of state to national rankers is probably at least 20:1 (less than 50:1 because of variation in state size), so if there are 2,000 nationally ranked students, there are 40,000 state-ranked students in something !

So state honors really don't help you stand out on your Princeton application. There are just too many of them around.

On the other hand, if you can get to be nationally ranked in something, you will have an amazing Spike that distinguishes you.

body_happywriter.jpg

Now known as: Personal Essay

Now, the dreaded personal statement. Boy, oh boy, did I fuss over this one.

"What is the perfect combination of personal, funny, heartrending, and inspirational?"

I know I was wondering this when I applied.

Having read books like 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays , I was frightened. I didn't grow up as a refugee, wrenched from my war-torn home! I didn't have a sibling with a debilitating illness! How could anything I write compare to these tales of personal strength?

The trite truth is that colleges want to know who you really are . Clearly they don't expect everyone to have had immense personal struggle. But they do want students who are:

  • growth-oriented
  • introspective
  • kind and good-hearted

Whatever those words mean to you in the context of your life is what you should write about.

In retrospect, in the context of MY application, the personal statement really wasn't what got me into Harvard . I do think my Spike was nearly sufficient to get me admitted to every school in the country.

I say "nearly" because, even if you're world-class, schools do want to know you're not a jerk and that you're an interesting person (which is conveyed through your personal essay and letters of recommendation).

Back then, we had a set of different prompts :

body_harvardapp_essayprompt.png

What did you think?

I'm still cringing a bit. Parts of this are very smug (see /r/iamverysmart ), and if you want to punch the writer in the face, I don't blame you. I want to as well.

We'll get to areas of improvement later, but first, let's talk about what this personal essay did well.

As I said above, I saw the theme of the snooze button as a VEHICLE to showcase a few qualities I cared about :

1) I fancied myself a Renaissance man (obnoxious, I know) and wanted to become an inventor and creator . I showed this through mentioning different interests (Rubik's cube, chemistry, Nietzsche) and iterating through a few designs for an alarm clock (electric shocks, explosions, Shakespearean sonnet recitation).

2) My personality was whimsical and irreverent. I don't take life too seriously. The theme of the essay—battling an alarm clock—shows this well, in comparison to the gravitas of the typical student essay. I also found individual lines funny, like "All right, so I had violated the divine honor of the family and the tenets of Confucius." At once I acknowledge my Chinese heritage but also make light of the situation.

3) I was open to admitting weaknesses , which I think is refreshing among people taking college applications too seriously and trying too hard to impress. The frank admission of a realistic lazy habit—pushing the Snooze button—served as a nice foil to my academic honors and shows that I can be down-to-earth.

So you see how the snooze button acts as a vehicle to carry these major points and a lot of details, tied together to the same theme .

In the same way, The Walking Dead is NOT a zombie show—the zombie environment is a VEHICLE by which to show human drama and conflict. Packaging my points together under the snooze button theme makes it a lot more interesting than just outright saying "I'm such an interesting guy."

So overall, I believe the essay accomplishes my goals and the main points of what I wanted to convey about myself.

Note that this is just one of many ways to write an essay . It worked for me, but it may be totally inappropriate for you.

Now let's look at this essay's weaknesses.

body_tryhard.jpg

Looking at it with a more seasoned perspective, some parts of it are WAY too try-hard. I try too hard to show off my breadth of knowledge in a way that seems artificial and embellishing.

The entire introduction with the Rubik's cube seems bolted on, just to describe my long-standing desire to be a Renaissance man. Only three paragraphs down do I get to the Snooze button, and I don't refer again to the introduction until the end. With just 650 words, I could have made the essay more cohesive by keeping the same theme from beginning to end.

Some phrases really make me roll my eyes. "Always hungry for more" and "ever the inventor" sound too forced and embellishing. A key principle of effective writing is to show, not say . You don't say "I'm passionate about X," you describe what extraordinary lengths you took to achieve X.

The mention of Nietzsche is over-the-top. I mean, come on. The reader probably thought, "OK, this kid just read it in English class and now he thinks he's a philosopher." The reader would be right.

The ending: "with the extra nine minutes, maybe I'll teach myself to cook fried rice" is silly. Where in the world did fried rice come from? I meant it as a nod to my Chinese heritage, but it's too sudden to work. I could have deleted the sentence and wrapped up the essay more cleanly.

So I have mixed feelings of my essay. I think it accomplished my major goals and showed the humorous, irreverent side of my personality well. However, it also gave the impression of a kid who thought he knew more than he did, a pseudo-sophisticate bordering on obnoxious. I still think it was a net positive.

At the end of the day, I believe the safest, surefire strategy is to develop a Spike so big that the importance of the Personal Essay pales in comparison to your achievements. You want your Personal Essay to be a supplement to your application, not the only reason you get in.

There are probably some cases where a well-rounded student writes an amazing Personal Essay and gets in through the strength of that. As a Hail Mary if you're a senior and can't improve your application further, this might work. But the results are very variable—some readers may love your essay, others may just think it's OK. Without a strong application to back it up, your mileage may vary.

body_teacherstudent.jpg

This is a really fun section. Usually you don't get to read your letter of recommendation because you sign the FERPA waiver. I've also reached out to my letter writers to make sure they're ok with my showing this.

Teacher recommendations are incredibly important to your application. I would say that after your coursework/test scores and activities/honors, they're the 3 rd most important component of your application .

The average teacher sees thousands of students through a career, and so he or she is very well equipped to position you relative to all other students. Furthermore, your teachers are experienced adults—their impressions of you are much more reliable than your impressions of yourself (see my Personal Essay above). They can corroborate your entire Personal Narrative as an outside observer.

The most effective recommendation letters speak both to your academic strengths and to your personality. For the second factor, the teacher needs to have interacted with you meaningfully, ideally both in and out of class. Check out our guide on what makes for effective letters of recommendation .

body_teacherclassroom.jpg

Starting from sophomore year, I started thinking about whom I connected better with and chose to engage with those teachers more deeply . Because it's standard for colleges to require two teachers in different subjects, I made sure to engage with English and history teachers as well as math and science.

The minimum requirement for a good letter is someone who taught a class in which you did well. I got straight A's in my coursework, so this wasn't an issue.

Beyond this, I had to look for teachers who would be strong advocates for me on both an academic and personal level . These tended to be teachers I vibed more strongly with, and typically these were teachers who demonstrably cared about teaching. This was made clear by their enthusiasm, how they treated students, and how much they went above expectations to help.

I had a lot of teachers who really just phoned it in and treated their job perfunctorily—these people are likely to write pretty blasé letters.

A final note before reading my actual teacher evaluations— you should avoid getting in the mindset where you get to know teachers JUST because you want a good recommendation letter . Your teachers have seen hundreds, if not thousands, of students pass through, and it's much easier to detect insincerity than you think.

If you honestly like learning and are an enthusiastic, responsible, engaging student, a great recommendation letter will follow naturally. The horse should lead the cart.

Read my How to Get a 4.0 GPA for tips on how to interact with teachers in a genuine way that'll make them love you.

body_chemistry.png

Teacher Letter #1: AP Chemistry Teacher

I took AP Chemistry in 10 th grade and had Miss Cherryl Vorak (now Mynster). She was young, having taught for fewer than 5 years when I had her. She was my favorite teacher throughout high school for these reasons:

  • She was enthusiastic, very caring, and spent a lot of time helping struggling students. She exuded pride in her work and seemed to consider teaching her craft.
  • She had a kind personality and was universally well liked by her students, even if they weren't doing so well. She was fair in her policies (it probably helped that science is more objective than English). She was also a younger teacher, and this helped her relate to kids more closely.
  • She was my advocate for much of the US National Chemistry Olympiad stuff, and in this capacity I got to know her even better outside of class. She provided me a lot of training materials, helped me figure out college chemistry, and directed me to resources to learn more.

By the time of the letter writing, I had known her for two full years and engaged with her continuously, even when I wasn't taking a class with her in junior year. We'd build up a strong relationship over the course of many small interactions.

All of this flowed down to the recommendation you see here. Remember, the horse leads the cart.

First, we'll look at the teacher evaluation page. The Common Application now has 16 qualities to rate, rather than the 10 here. But they're largely the same.

body_harvardapp_teacher1-1.png

You can see a very strong evaluation here, giving me the highest ratings possible for all qualities.

In today's Common Application, all of these Ratings are retained, aside from "Potential for Growth." Today's Common App also now includes Faculty Respect, Maturity, Leadership, Integrity, Reaction to Setbacks, Concern for Others, and TE Overall. You can tell that the updated Common App places a great emphasis on personality.

The most important point here: it is important to be ranked "One of the top few encountered in my career" for as many ratings as possible . If you're part of a big school, this is CRITICAL to distinguish yourself from other students. The more experienced and trustworthy the teacher, the more meaningful this is.

Again, it's a numbers game. Think about the 20,000+ high schools in the country housing 4 million+ high school students—how many people fit in the top 5% bucket?

Thus, being marked merely as Excellent (top 10%) is actually a negative rating , as far as admissions to top colleges is concerned. If you're in top 10%, and someone else with the SAME teacher recommender is being rated as "One of the top ever," it's really hard for the admissions officer to vouch for you over the other student.

You really want to make sure you're one of the best in your school class, if not one of the best the teacher has ever encountered. You'll see below how you can accomplish this.

Next, let's look at her letter.

As you read this, think— what are the interactions that would prompt the teacher to write a recommendation like this? This was a relationship built up in a period of over 2 years, with every small interaction adding to an overall larger impression.

body_harvardapp_teacher1-3.png

You can see how seriously they take the letter because of all the underlining . This admissions reader underlined things that weren't even underlined in my application, like my US National Chemistry Olympiad awards. It's one thing for a student to claim things about himself—it's another to have a teacher put her reputation on the line to advocate for her student.

The letter here is very strong for a multitude of reasons. First, the length is notable —most letters are just a page long, but this is nearly two full pages , single spaced. This indicates not just her overall commitment to her students but also of her enthusiastic support for me as an applicant.

The structure is effective: first Miss Vorak talks about my academic accomplishments, then about my personal qualities and interactions, then a summary to the future. This is a perfect blend of what effective letters contain .

On the micro-level, her diction and phrasing are precise and effective . She makes my standing clear with specific statements : "youngest student…top excelling student among the two sections" and "one of twenty students in the nation." She's clear about describing why my achievements are notable and the effort I put in, like studying college-level chemistry and studying independently.

When describing my personality, she's exuberant and fleshes out a range of dimensions: "conscientious, motivated and responsible," "exhibits the qualities of a leader," "actively seeks new experiences," "charismatic," "balanced individual with a warm personality and sense of humor." You can see how she's really checking off all the qualities colleges care about.

Overall, Miss Vorak's letter perfectly supports my Personal Narrative —my love for science, my overall academic performance, and my personality. I'm flattered and grateful to have received this support. This letter was important to complement the overall academic performance and achievements shown on the rest of my application.

feature_English-1.jpg

Teacher Letter #2: AP English Language Teacher

My second teacher Mrs. Swift was another favorite. A middle-aged, veteran English teacher, the best way I would describe her is "fiery." She was invigorating and passionate, always trying to get a rise out of students and push their thinking, especially in class discussions. Emotionally she was a reliable source of support for students.

First, the evaluation:

body_harvardapp_teacher2-1.png

You can see right away that her remarks are terser. She didn't even fill out the section about "first words that come to mind to describe this student."

You might chalk this up to my not being as standout of a student in her mind, or her getting inundated with recommendation letter requests after over a decade of teaching.

In ratings, you can see that I only earned 3 of the "one of the top in my career." There are a few explanations for this. As a teacher's career lengthens, it gets increasingly hard to earn this mark. I probably also didn't stand out as much as I did to my Chemistry teacher—most of my achievement was in science (which she wasn't closely connected to), and I had talented classmates. Regardless, I did appreciate the 3 marks she gave me.

Now, the letter. Once again, as you read this letter, think: what are the hundreds of micro-interactions that would have made a teacher write a letter like this?

body_harvardapp_teacher2-3.png

Overall, this letter is very strong. It's only one page long, but her points about my personality are the critical piece of this recommendation. She also writes with the flair of an English teacher:

"In other situations where students would never speak their minds, he showed no hesitation to voice questions, thoughts, and ideas."

"controversial positions often being the spark that set off the entire class"

"ability to take the quiet and shy student and actively engage"…"went out of my way to partner him with other students who needed"

"strength of conviction"…"raw, unbridled passion"…"He will argue on any topic that has touched a nerve."

These comments most support the personality aspect of my Personal Narrative—having an irreverent, bold personality and not being afraid of speaking my mind. She stops just short of making me sound obnoxious and argumentative. An experienced teacher vouching for this adds so much more weight than just my writing it about myself.

Teacher recommendations are some of the most important components of your application. Getting very strong letters take a lot of sustained, genuine interaction over time to build mutual trust and respect. If you want detailed advice on how to interact with teachers earnestly, check out my How to Get a 4.0 GPA and Better Grades guide .

Let's go to the final recommendation, from the school counselor.

body_school.png

Now known as: School Report

The first piece of this is reporting your academic status and how the school works overall. There's not much to say here, other than the fact that my Principal wrote my recommendation for me, which we'll get into next.

body_harvardapp_school1.png

Counselor Recommendation

Now known as: Counselor Recommendation

Let's talk about my school principal writing my recommendation, rather than a school counselor.

This was definitely advantageous—remember how, way up top in Educational Data, the reader circled the "Principal." Our Principal only wrote a handful of these recommendations each year , often for people who worked closely with him, like student body presidents. So it was pretty distinctive that I got a letter from our Principal, compared to other leading applicants from my school.

This was also a blessing because our counseling department was terrible . Our school had nearly 1,000 students per grade, and only 1 counselor per grade. They were overworked and ornery, and because they were the gatekeepers of academic enrollment (like class selection and prerequisites), this led to constant frictions in getting the classes you wanted.

I can empathize with them, because having 500+ neurotic parents pushing for advantages for their own kids can get REALLY annoying really fast. But the counseling department was still the worst part of our high school administration, and I could have guessed that the letters they wrote were mediocre because they just had too many students.

So how did my Principal come to write my recommendation and not those for hundreds of other students?

I don't remember exactly how this came to be, to be honest. I didn't strategize to have him write a letter for me years in advance. I didn't even interact with him much at all until junior year, when I got on his radar because of my national rankings. Come senior year I might have talked to him about my difficulty in reaching counselors and asked that he write my recommendation. Since I was a top student he was probably happy to do this.

He was very supportive, but as you can tell from the letter to come, it was clear he didn't know me that well.

Interestingly, the prompt for the recommendation has changed. It used to start with: "Please write whatever you think is important about this student."

Now, it starts with: " Please provide comments that will help us differentiate this student from others ."

The purpose of the recommendation has shifted to the specific: colleges probably found that one counselor was serving hundreds of students, so the letters started getting mushy and indistinguishable from each other.

Here's the letter:

body_harvardapp_school3.png

This letter is probably the weakest overall of all my letters. It reads more like a verbal resume than a personal account of how he understands me.

Unlike my two teacher recommendations, he doesn't comment on the nature of our interactions or about my personality (because he truly didn't understand them well). He also misreported by SAT score as 1530 instead of 1600 (I did score a 1530 in an early test, but my 1600 was ready by January 2004, so I don't know what source he was using).

Notably, the letter writer didn't underline anything.

I still appreciate that he wrote my letter, and it was probably more effective than a generic counselor letter. But this didn't add much to my application.

At this point, we've covered my entire Common Application. This is the same application I sent to every school I applied to, including Harvard, Princeton, and Stanford. Thanks for reading this far—I hope you've gotten a lot out of this already.

If you keep reading to the end, I'll have advice for both younger students and current applicants to build the strongest application possible.

Next, we'll go over the Harvard Supplemental Application, which of course is unique to Harvard.

body_harvard-1.jpg

For most top colleges like Princeton, Yale, Stanford, Columbia, and so on, you will need to complete a supplemental application to provide more info than what's listed on the Common Application.

Harvard was and is the same. The good news is that it's an extra chance for you to share more about yourself and keep pushing your Personal Narrative.

There are four major components here:

  • The application form
  • Writing supplement essay
  • Supplementary recommendations
  • Supplemental application materials

I'll take you through the application section by section.

Harvard Supplement Form

First, the straightforward info and questions.

body_harvardapp_supp1.png

This section is pretty straightforward and is similar to what you'd see on a Columbia application.

I planned to live in a Harvard residence, as most students do.

Just as in my Common App, I noted that I was most likely to study biological sciences, choose Medicine as my vocation, and participate in orchestra, writing, and research as my extracurriculars. Nothing surprising here—it's all part of my Personal Narrative.

Interestingly, at the time I was "absolutely certain" about my vocational goals, which clearly took a detour once I left medical school to pursue entrepreneurship to create PrepScholar...

Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points?   We have the industry's leading SAT prep program. Built by Harvard grads and SAT full scorers, the program learns your strengths and weaknesses through advanced statistics, then customizes your prep program to you so you get the most effective prep possible.   Along with more detailed lessons, you'll get thousands of practice problems organized by individual skills so you learn most effectively. We'll also give you a step-by-step program to follow so you'll never be confused about what to study next.   Check out our 5-day free trial today:

I had the space to list some additional honors, where I listed some musical honors that didn't make the cut in my Common App.

Here are the next two pages of the Harvard supplemental form.

body_harvardapp_supp3.png

The most interesting note here is that the admissions officer wrote a question mark above "Music tape or CD." Clearly this was inconsistent with my Personal Narrative —if violin was such an important part of my story, why didn't I want to include it?

The reason was that I was actually pretty mediocre at violin and was nowhere near national-ranked. Again, remember how many concertmasters in the thousands of orchestras there are in the world—I wasn't good enough to even be in the top 3 chairs in my school orchestra (violin was very competitive).

I wanted to focus attention on my most important materials, which for my Personal Narrative meant my research work. You'll see these supplementary materials later.

body_writing-1.jpg

Additional Essays

Now known as: Writing Supplement

For the most part, the Harvard supplemental essay prompt has stayed the same. You can write about a topic of your choice or about any of the suggestions. There are now two more prompts that weren't previously there: "What you would want your future college roommate to know about you" and "How you hope to use your college education."

Even though this is optional, I highly recommend you write something here. Again, you have so few chances in the overall application to convey your personal voice—an extra 500 words gives you a huge opportunity. I would guess that the majority of admitted Harvard students submit a Writing Supplement.

After a lot of brainstorming, I settled on the idea that I wanted to balance my application by writing about the major non-academic piece of my Personal Narrative—my music training . Also, I don't think I explicitly recognized this at the time, but I wanted to distance myself from the Asian-American stereotype—driven entirely by parent pressure, doing most things perfunctorily and without interest. I wanted to show I'd broken out of that mold.

Here's my essay:

body_harvardapp_suppessay1.png

Reading it now, I actually think this was a pretty bad essay, and I cringe to high heaven. But once again, let's focus on the positive first.

I used my violin teacher as a vehicle for talking about what the violin meant to me. (You can tell I love the concept of the vehicle in essays.) He represented passion for the violin—I represented my academic priorities. Our personal conflict was really the conflict between what we represented.

By the end of the essay, I'd articulated the value of musical training to me—it was cathartic and a way to balance my hard academic pursuits.

Halfway in the essay, I also explicitly acknowledged the Asian stereotype of parents who drove their kids, and said my parents were no different. The reader underlined this sentence. By pointing this out and showing how my interest took on a life of its own, I wanted to distance myself from that stereotype.

So overall I think my aims were accomplished.

Despite all that, this essay was WAY overdramatic and overwrought . Some especially terrible lines:

"I was playing for that cathartic moment when I could feel Tchaikovsky himself looking over my shoulder."

"I was wandering through the fog in search of a lighthouse, finally setting foot on a dock pervaded by white light."

OK, please. Who really honestly feels this way? This is clumsy, contrived writing. It signals insincerity, actually, which is bad.

To be fair, all of this is grounded in truth. I did have a strict violin teacher who did get pretty upset when I showed lack of improvement. I did appreciate music as a diversion to round out my academic focus. I did practice hard each day, and I did have a pretty gross callus on my pinky.

But I would have done far better by making it more sincere and less overworked.

As an applicant, you're tempted to try so hard to impress your reader. You want to show that you're Worthy of Consideration. But really the best approach is to be honest.

I think this essay was probably neutral to my application, not a strong net positive or net negative.

feature_recommended.jpg

Supplementary Recommendations

Harvard lets you submit letters from up to two Other Recommenders. The Princeton application, Penn application, and others are usually the same.

Unlike the other optional components (the Additional Information in the Common App, and the Supplementary Essay), I would actually consider these letters optional. The reader gets most of the recommendation value from your teacher recommendations—these are really supplementary.

A worthwhile Other Recommender:

  • has supervised an activity or honor that is noteworthy
  • has interacted with you extensively and can speak to your personality
  • is likely to support you as one of the best students they've interacted with

If your Other Recommenders don't fulfill one or more of these categories, do NOT ask for supplementary letters. They'll dilute your application without adding substantively to it.

To beat a dead horse, the primary component of my Personal Narrative was my science and research work. So naturally I chose supervisors for my two major research experiences to write supplemental letters.

First was the Director of Research Science Institute (the selective summer research program at MIT). The second was from the head of Jisan Research Institute, where I did Computer Science research.

body_harvardapp_supprec1.png

This letter validates my participation in RSI and incorporates the feedback from my research mentor, David Simon. At the time, the RSI students were the most talented students I had met, so I'm also flattered by some of the things the letter writer said, like "Allen stood out early on as a strong performer in academic settings."

I didn't get to know the letter writer super well, so he commented mainly on my academic qualifications and comments from my mentor.

My mentor, who was at one of the major Harvard-affiliated hospitals, said some very nice things about my research ability, like:

"is performing in many ways at the level of a graduate student"

"impressed with Allen's ability to read even advanced scientific publications and synthesize his understanding"

Once again, it's much more convincing for a seasoned expert to vouch for your abilities than for you to claim your own abilities.

My first research experience was done at Jisan Research Institute, a small private computer science lab run by a Caltech PhD. The research staff were mainly high school students like me and a few grad students/postdocs.

My research supervisor, Sanza Kazadi, wrote the letter. He's requested that I not publish the letter, so I'll only speak about his main points.

In the letter, he focused on the quality of my work and leadership. He said that I had a strong focus in my work, and my research moved along more reliably than that of other students. I was independent in my work in swarm engineering, he says, putting together a simulation of the swarm and publishing a paper in conference proceedings. He talked about my work in leading a research group and placing a high degree of trust in me.

Overall, a strong recommendation, and you get the gist of his letter without reading it.

One notable point—both supplemental letters had no marks on them. I really think this means they place less emphasis on the supplementary recommendations, compared to the teacher recommendations.

Finally, finally, we get to the very last piece of my application.

Let me beat the dead horse even deader. Because research was such a core part of my Personal Narrative, I decided to include abstracts of both of my papers. The main point was to summarize the body of work I'd done and communicate the major results.

As Harvard says, "These materials are entirely optional; please only submit them if you have unusual talents."

This is why I chose not to submit a tape of my music: I don't think my musical skill was unusually good.

And frankly, I don't think my research work was that spectacular. Unlike some of my very accomplished classmates, I hadn't ranked nationally in prestigious competitions like ISEF and Siemens. I hadn't published my work in prominent journals.

Regardless, I thought these additions would be net positive, if only marginally so.

body_harvardapp_suppabs1.png

I made sure to note where the papers had been published or were entering competitions, just to ground the work in some achievement.

body_road.jpg
  • Recommendation Letters: Hopefully you should have developed strong, genuine relationships with teachers you care about. The letters should flow naturally from here, and you will only need to do gentle prodding to make sure they meet deadlines.
  • Keep Reading

    At PrepScholar, we've published the best guides available anywhere to help you succeed in high school and college admissions.

    Here's a sampling of our most popular articles:

    How to Get a Perfect SAT Score / Perfect ACT Score —Learn the strategies I used to get a perfect 1600 on the SAT, and a perfect 36 on the ACT.

    SAT 800 Series: Reading | Math | Writing —Learn important strategies to excel in each section of the SAT.

    ACT 36 Series: English | Math | Reading | Science —Learn how to get a perfect 36 on each section of the ACT.

    How to Get Into Harvard and the Ivy League —The foundational guide where I discuss the philosophy behind what colleges are looking for, how to develop a Spike, and why being well-rounded is the path to rejection.

    How to Get a 4.0 GPA and Better Grades —Are you struggling with getting strong grades in challenging coursework? I step you through all the major concepts you need to excel in school, from high-level mindset to individual class strategies.

    Trending Now

    How to Get Into Harvard and the Ivy League

    How to Get a Perfect 4.0 GPA

    How to Write an Amazing College Essay

    What Exactly Are Colleges Looking For?

    ACT vs. SAT: Which Test Should You Take?

    When should you take the SAT or ACT?

    Get Your Free

    PrepScholar

    Find Your Target SAT Score

    Free Complete Official SAT Practice Tests

    How to Get a Perfect SAT Score, by an Expert Full Scorer

    Score 800 on SAT Math

    Score 800 on SAT Reading and Writing

    How to Improve Your Low SAT Score

    Score 600 on SAT Math

    Score 600 on SAT Reading and Writing

    Find Your Target ACT Score

    Complete Official Free ACT Practice Tests

    How to Get a Perfect ACT Score, by a 36 Full Scorer

    Get a 36 on ACT English

    Get a 36 on ACT Math

    Get a 36 on ACT Reading

    Get a 36 on ACT Science

    How to Improve Your Low ACT Score

    Get a 24 on ACT English

    Get a 24 on ACT Math

    Get a 24 on ACT Reading

    Get a 24 on ACT Science

    Stay Informed

    Get the latest articles and test prep tips!

    Follow us on Facebook (icon)

    As co-founder and head of product design at PrepScholar, Allen has guided thousands of students to success in SAT/ACT prep and college admissions. He's committed to providing the highest quality resources to help you succeed. Allen graduated from Harvard University summa cum laude and earned two perfect scores on the SAT (1600 in 2004, and 2400 in 2014) and a perfect score on the ACT. You can also find Allen on his personal website, Shortform , or the Shortform blog .

    Ask a Question Below

    Have any questions about this article or other topics? Ask below and we'll reply!

    10 Successful Harvard Application Essays | 2020

    Our new 2022 version is up now.

    Our 2022 edition is sponsored by HS2 Academy—a premier college counseling company that has helped thousands of students gain admission into Ivy League-level universities across the world. Learn more at www.hs2academy.com . Also made possible by The Art of Applying, College Confidential, Crimson Education, Dan Lichterman, Key Education, MR. MBA®, Potomac Admissions, Prep Expert, and Prepory.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    I am standing behind my high school when a snowball pelts my side with a thud and splatters across my jacket, covering me with a fine, icy dust. My bewildered eyes trace the snowball’s trajectory until they fall upon a pair of snickering hoodlums crouched behind a small mountain of snowballs. They must have been waiting all afternoon for an unsuspecting student to walk by, and perhaps for emphasis, one of the boys looks me in the eye and raises a grimy middle finger. Quickly, I mold a handful of snow into a sphere with cupped hands and cock my arm back.

    I haven’t thrown anything in a while, but muscle memory guides me through the requisite motions. I played softball for eight years, and my athletic strength was always my throwing arm; in fifth grade, when my coach asked me to throw the ball from third to first, I hurled the ball with such force that the catch knocked him off-balance. Upon entering high school, it seemed natural that I would play on the school’s softball team.

    However, my body had other ideas. Throughout middle school I’d developed increasingly painful body aches, and in freshman year I awoke one morning with a brutal headache penetrating the crown of my head and the bones of my face as though a vice had been clamped to my skull overnight. After consulting more doctors than I can remember, I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia.

    Fibromyalgia is characterized by chronic widespread pain and extreme sensitivity to touch. My neurologist describes fibromyalgia as “headache of the body.” Personally, I favor my father’s description; after one particularly painful and exhausting day he aptly proclaimed, “Fibromyalgia is your body’s way of giving you the finger.”

    Agonizing muscle cramps mocked me constantly, preventing me from walking longer than five minutes without growing exhausted. The pressure above my eyes sneered at me whenever I attempted to read or write. Even after I found medications to temper the headaches just enough so I could return to school with sporadic attendance, sharp pains gnawed at my body with haughty derision if I even thought about returning to the softball fields and the activities I loved.

    For months I tried to ignore the cruel obscenities fibromyalgia hurled my way, steadfastly believing the pain would soon subside and I would achieve everything I had planned for myself if I simply disregarded the taunting aches and worked doggedly to catch up at school. But when softball season arrived, it became apparent that while determination and intelligence could preserve my GPA in the face of fibromyalgia, there was no personal attribute or skill that could heal my body and allow me to join my teammates on the field.

    It was time to confront the beast.

    In doing so, I kept in mind the schoolyard aphorism that there is strength in numbers. I did not face fibromyalgia alone, but with mathematics by my side. Baseball is a game of statistics, and if fibromyalgia threatened to steal the sport I loved through physical deterioration, I would outsmart this insolent illness and reclaim ownership of baseball through intellectual pursuits. I began a mathematical research project, analyzing the effectiveness of current baseball statistics, as well as deriving my own.

    Fibromyalgia forced me to redefine my goals and personal standards for success. This baseball project was my first step toward reclaiming my life and laying the foundation for victory over my illness. As calculations replaced pitching drills, my passion for baseball was channeled into a burgeoning love of science and math. Hours I had previously devoted to softball became filled with scientific journals and books, and summers I used to spend at athletic camps were devoted to research at local universities. Baseball provided a link to my pre-fibromyalgia life at a time when I desperately needed one, and through baseball I realized that if I wanted to beat fibromyalgia, I could not simply hope it would disappear overnight. Whether I modified my medications or adapted my schedule, I needed to devise my own way to face fibromyalgia’s antagonizing aches head-on.

    So when that taunting rascal waves his middle finger in my direction, my cheeks do not flush with angry humiliation and my legs do not run away, but my hands mold a snowball and my arm pulls back. As I follow through with my throw, pain radiating up my arm, I know instantly that I will pay for this exertion in the morning. But my icy comeback hits the sniggering boy squarely in the chest, knocking him backward into the snow as his accomplice’s mouth lies agape in shock.

    Well. I guess I’ve still got it.

    Sarah's story opens with a vivid anecdote of being pelted by a snowball that brings the reader to the scene of the crime with detailed sensory descriptions. She skillfully ties the story to her talent for athletics, which in turn leads to her struggle with fibromyalgia and howin the face of physical limitation she redirected her passions to science and math. The story comes full circle and ties together nicely at the end with the conclusion of the snowball scene, which leaves the reader feeling victorious and vindicated for Sarah, as well as proud of her determination.

    Sarah manages to cover a lot in this essay. The personal statement is an evident combination of overcoming obstacles and discovering academic passions, and also discreetly includes résumé- worthy accomplishments, such as her own mathematical research project on baseball statistics and summer research at local universities. What is important about her personal statement is that she goes beyond the résumé and gives the admissions officers a look at her character and personal struggle. Even though her essay is a bit long, Sarah does not waste a word and ensures that every detail she includes contributes in some way to the overall message she is trying to convey about herself. Rather than simply evoking sympathy for her situation, Sarah weaves humor and a cheeky attitude throughout her narrative. She introduces her love of mathematics with a creative twist on the common saying, “strength in numbers," and affectionately alludes to her father's depiction of fibromyalgia as "your body's way of giving you the finger."

    Her vivacious and tenacious personality shines through in her colorful and descriptive language, painting a clear picture of Sarah as a determined person who doesn't let a chronic illness defeat her and instead finds another passion.

    Empowerly

    I look over at the digital clock at the front of the bus just as the time changes to 8:30. The engine begins to rumble, the seat begins to shake, and the bus slowly pulls onto Route 6 and heads toward JPA—the Jay Pritzker Academy—near Siem Reap, Cambodia. The bus is alive with chatter. Peace Corps volunteers trade stories about their experiences in their assigned villages; international schoolteachers discuss their plans for the day’s lessons. I overhear one of the Peace Corps volunteers, Deidre, say, “I have to say, the Peace Corps offers incredible health care. They medevaced me to Bangkok when I got dengue fever.”

    Today, I find myself unable to join the conversation. I stare blankly at the blue cloth seat in front of me, trying to gently coax my knotted stomach out of my throat. All I can think about is the empty seat beside me and the uncomfortable feeling of entering uncertain territory alone.

    My friend and co-teacher, Shahriyar, is in the Angkor Hospital recovering from a serious bout of amoebic dysentery. I visited him yesterday. He was lying in bed with his summer reading in his right hand and an IV in his left. Looking pale and exhausted, he weakly lifted his head and greeted me. “I don’t know if you know this yet,” he said, “but I’m flying home tomorrow. Are you coming with me?” Though the news didn’t surprise me, the question caught me off guard. As I left the hospital room, I couldn’t help but think how easily this could have been me in his situation.

    The bus drives over a speed bump faster than it should have, and I’m jolted back to the present. I try to take my mind off Shahriyar and look out the window at the world around me. Everything is so much different than it is in Deerfield, yet it all somehow feels very natural to me. To my left I see an elderly woman wearing a mask sweeping dust off the street; I smile at her, but she doesn’t notice. As the bus gets closer and closer to JPA, the fact that I will have to teach today’s lessons by myself begins to set in. I wonder if I’m physically capable of teaching three hours of class by myself in the ninetydegree heat and 90 percent humidity. In the past, Shahriyar and I had always taken turns leading the class, giving each other a few moments to rest and rehydrate while the other taught. A part of me is afraid to do it. I’ve never had to lead the class without the comfort and support of having Shahriyar by my side. As I think about the challenges I will face, I realize how easy it would be to turn back. I only have to call Sokun—a local tuk-tuk driver and he’d take me to the airport. Knowing my co-teacher has become seriously ill, nobody would think less of me if I went home today.

    As I sit in my seat, planning my trip home, the bus slows nearly to a stop and then turns onto a narrow red dirt road. I’ve suddenly plunged into a new world. The mess of worn-down concrete buildings and mopeds gives way to miles of flooded rice paddies stretching as far as I can see. Every few hundred yards I see boys and young men working barefoot in the fields. The bamboo huts that dot the landscape make me think back to my visit to the house of one of my students, Dari. I remember looking into his room and seeing a wooden table on his dirt floor. Close by, a bamboo shelf was filled with books. The globe he had won for being on the Honor Roll was proudly displayed on the bookshelf among his prized possessions. Smiling ear to ear, he told us that JPA was the best thing in his life. I realize that it really is too late to go home. I’ve already fallen in love with my students.

    As the bus pulls into JPA’s driveway, the rest of the teachers begin gathering their materials. I remain seated, deep in thought. “Are you coming?” I hear a familiar voice ask me. I look up and see Deidre looking at me.

    “Of course I am.”

    In essays about community service, it is easy to fall into the trap of self-aggrandizement— emphasizing your own personal sacrifices and good deeds and in the process making yourself look like someone more interested in self-service than community service. Josh’s essay, on the other hand, steers well clear of this pitfall, skillfully conveying compassion, humility, and devotion to the people with and for whom he works—he does not stay on because he pities his students, but because he loves them. As a result, instead of coming off like résumé padding, Josh’s work feels motivated by a genuine desire to do good.

    Structurally, Josh’s essay is solid—it traces the trajectory of his thought process from uncertainty to renewed resolve. This seemingly straightforward story arc is enlivened by choice details and images—the off-hand conversation about dengue fever in the first paragraph, for example, adds a good jolt of surprise, and the descriptions of the Cambodian countryside are vivid and well-executed. The passage detailing Josh’s visit to his student Dari’s home is one of the essay’s highlights, a scene that is both believable as the essay’s “inspiration moment” and memorable for the deep empathy it contains.

    While it’s true that Josh has the advantage of a rather unique experience—not every Harvard applicant is in a position to write their personal statement about volunteering with the Peace Corps— the main strengths of his essay are certainly translatable beyond this context. Josh’s essay is a personal statement at its best: it not just narrates an experience but hints at deeper elements of his personality and expresses them in a way that does not come off as forced. Someone reading Josh’s essay can tell that his volunteering experience was far more to him than résumé fodder. And as the admissions office gets deluged with more and more applications every year, this spark of sincerity goes very far indeed.

    I sat under the table, burying my head tightly in my folded arms, while the other children sat on the carpet, listening to the teacher’s story. The language barrier was like a tsunami, gurgling with strange and indistinguishable vocalizations. Elementary school wasn’t as fun as I expected at all.

    Hearing a whisper, I raised my head up, only to notice a boy’s face merely inches away. I bolted up in surprise, my head colliding gracefully with the underside of the table. Yelping in pain, I noticed that the entire class was staring at me.

    That was the story of how I met my first friend in Canada.

    That boy, Jack, came to visit me during my lonely recesses. It was rather awkward at first—I could only stare at him as he rambled on in English. But it was comforting to have some company.

    From there, our friendship blossomed. Our initial conversations must have been hilarious to the hapless bystander. Jack would speak in fluent English while I spurted sentence after sentence of Mandarin. It was like watching tennis—rallies of English and Mandarin back and forth. But I learned quickly, and in no time I was fluent.

    Jack also showed me the ropes of Western culture. Heaven knows how embarrassing my birthday party would’ve been if he hadn’t told me about those so-called “loot-bags” beforehand.

    Today, I volunteer at a community service agency for new immigrants where I work with children. I do it because I understand the confusion and frustration of dealing with a strange and sometimes hostile environment; I remember how it feels to be tangled up in an amalgam of unfamiliar words and sounds. And so I teach them; I give seminars on reading, writing, and speaking skills as well as Western culture, history, and sometimes, a bit of social studies.

    But I strive to do more than just that. I try to be a friend—because I remember how Jack helped me. I organize field trips to the science center, the museum, and the symphony: double-whammy trips where children can have fun while improving their literacy skills.

    Through these experiences, I try to understand each of them as unique individuals—their likes, dislikes, pet peeves, background.

    Everyone needs a guiding light through the lonesome process of adaptation, a friendly bump to lift them from the dark shroud of isolation. That’s what Jack did for me—with a rather painful bump to the head—and it’s also what I do for these immigrant children.

    My hope is that, one day, these children will also feel compelled to do the same, helping others adapt to an unfamiliar environment. With this, we can truly create a caring and cohesive network of support for the children of our society.

    Lucien's essay depicts a personal connection with his community service activity and provides the why to an extracurricular that probably shows up college application. He starts off with an endearing anecdote of meeting his first friend in Canada and connects the encounter to his current passion, then delves even deeper by concluding with self- reflection and a bigger goal for society that he hopes to achieve. His personal statement gives the reader a glimpse at his background and assimilation into a new culture, and how his qwn experience as an immigrant motivates him to help other immigrants adapt to life in a new place.

    The strengths of this essay lie in the vivid and charming recounting of his first encounter with Jack, his first friend in a foreign new environment, and how he uses that story to explain his passion for volunteering. He connects his community service to a bigger goal at the end of the essay that leaves the reader feeling inspired, and alludes to his thoughts, hopes, and dreams. There is a tone of humility and humor as he depicts how he met his first friend by bumping his head under the table, and makes a motif out of the head bump by referring to it again later when he's talking about helping other immigrant children. He modestly credits his noble deeds at the community service agency to meeting his first friend, and humbly reveals his hope that his own good deeds will inspire others to pay it forward. He does a good job of exhibiting his accomplishments in community service without sounding like he's bragging.

    Lucien could also make the essay more memorable and distinctive by including anecdotes of his experiences at the community service agency where he gave seminars and organized field trips. He denotes his volunteering responsibilities in list form, which can seem a bit impersonal and résumé- like. For example, he mentions how he tried to understand the people he helped, but does not include how he goes about doing this, or whether learning about those unique individuals contributed to his experience. Adding a story of how he changed the lives of the immigrants he helped would enhance his message and create a fitting parallel with the anecdote of how Jack helped him as he assimilated only one line on the activities portion of his into Western culture. Overall, Lucien combines humor with humility and leaves the reader feeling inspired.

    Options for College

    I think the most tragic part of my childhood originated from my sheer inability to find anything engraved with my name. I never had a CHAFFEE license plate on my hand-me-down red Schwinn. No one ever gave me a key chain or coffee mug with the beautiful loops of those double Fs and Es. Alas, I was destined to search through the names; longingly staring at the space between CHAD and CHARLOTTE hoping one day a miracle would occur. Fortunately, this is one of the few negative aspects of a name like “Chaffee Duckers.”

    My name has always been an integral part of my identity. Sure, it sounds a bit like my parents created it from a bag of Scrabble tiles, but it comes from a long-lost ancestor, Comfort Chaffee. Now it’s all mine. In my opinion, a name can make or break a person. The ability to embody a name depends on the individual. My greatest goal in life is to be the kind of unique person deserving of a name so utterly random and absurd.

    I began my journey in preschool. Nothing about me screamed normal. I was not prim, proper, and poised. I preferred sneaking away from my preschool classroom, barefoot, in the purple velvet dress I wore every single day to resting obediently during nap time.

    I grew up in a family akin to a modified Brady Bunch. Stepsisters, half sisters, stepbrothers, and stepparents joined my previously miniscule household. But in a family of plain names like Chris, Bill, John, Liz, Katherine, and Mark, I was still the only Chaffee.

    I was a bit of a reverse black sheep in my family. My name helped me carve an identity separate from my myriad of siblings. Instead of enriching my brain with Grand Theft Auto, I preferred begging my parents to take me to the bookstore. While my parents mandated homework time for my brothers, they never questioned my work ethic or wiretapped my assignment notebook. The thing that set me apart from the herd was that I was self-disciplined enough to take control of my own life. From the very beginning I never depended on my parents’ help or motivation to finish my schoolwork. Putting school first came naturally to me, much to the distaste and confusion of my siblings. My work ethic became known as the patented “Chaffee Method.”

    As I got older, I began to embody my name more and more. I didn’t want to be that girl with the weird name in the back of the class eating her hair, so I learned how to project my ideas in both written and spoken forms. I was often picked to lead classroom discussions and my complete disregard for making a fool of myself bolstered that skill. The manner in which I operate academically is perfectly described as Chaffee-esque; including but not limited to elaborate study songs, complex pneumonic devices, study forts, and the occasional John C. Calhoun costume.

    I take pride in the confusion on a person’s face when they first read my name. Seeing someone struggle over those two unfamiliar syllables fills me with glee. I feel as though I am adding a new word to their vocabulary. So on my last day as a page in the U.S. Senate, I prepared myself for the anticipated awkward stumbling as Senator Harry Reid thanked me by name in his closing address. But the stumble never came. I felt very humbled by his perfect pronunciation. Perhaps Chaffee is actually catching on!

    Chaffee’s essay is strong because it follows a clear narrative, all enabled by her rather unusual name. While not everyone has a name as unique as “Chaffee,” and are therefore unable to use this approach, writing an essay about an experience or aspect of one’s life that is singular to oneself is a smart approach for any college essay. She shapes her development from preschool to high school in the lens of her name, demonstrating the importance that it has played throughout her life.

    Chaffee’s initial anecdote immediately grips the reader; many people have shared the experience of looking for engraved merchandise, and the fact that she can find none bearing her name sets the stage for the rest of the essay. Chaffee quickly qualifies her discontent with her name, stating that this anecdote “is one of the few negative aspects of a name like ‘Chaffee Duckers.’” Unfortunately this qualification is a bit misplaced since she immediately returns to tell a story of her upbringing while failing to address any of the positive aspects of her name until paragraphs later. This is a bit of hedging that isn’t entirely necessary in the limited space allowed by most personal statements.

    Yet, the essay works quite well. Chaffee spends a great deal of time elaborating on how she was different from both her family and others with examples of her transgressions in preschool and her penchant for schoolwork and education as opposed to procrastination or video games like Grand Theft Auto. Chaffee toots her own horn just a little bit when describing the merits of her work ethic, but it is still fairly endearing overall, and there is no shame in sharing a desire for learning. Chaffee states in the conclusion of her essay that she now takes “pride in the confusion on a person’s face,” as they try to read her name, demonstrating how she has now accepted and come to appreciate the fact that she does not share a name with the average Mary, Dick, or Jane.

    Upward College Planning

    “Let’s face it, you’re slow,” my violin teacher said.

    He was, as always, complaining that running was detracting from my practice time.

    That summed up what running had always meant to me, ever since I was a seventh grader, choosing his sport for the first time. I was fine and content, however. I always had Jeffrey and Archie, classmates like me who ran slowly. We were good friends. We laughed together; we raced together; we pushed each other, and endured tough workouts together. But after middle school the people I trained with went on to do things they were better at. I remained, even though I was not good enough to be considered for varsity.

    High school running was hell. I struggled with workouts, most of which I had to run alone. In the hot, dry days of autumn, I often coughed on the dust trails left by my teammates as they vanished into the distance. During the workouts, I got passed incessantly, almost getting run over on occasion. It hurt not to be important; to be dead weight for the team. I looked forward to the next year, when I could hopefully run with the incoming freshmen.

    It didn’t happen that way. Even a year later, I was still the slowest on the team. How could the freshmen who had snored off the whole summer beat me, a veteran from middle school and high school with decent summer training? I nevertheless reconsidered the effectiveness of my training, and looked forward to getting “back in shape.” It was only after my condition had been deteriorating steadily for a few weeks that I began to feel a new level of humiliation. I started to have trouble keeping up with old ladies in the park, and each day I worked frantically to prevent the discovery of that fact by my teammates, running toward the sketchy areas of the ramble, in the south, where there’s barely anybody. My mother, worried about the steady deterioration of my condition, contacted a doctor.

    I was anemic.

    The doctor prescribed a daily iron pill, and the results were exhilarating. I joked that I was taking steroids. I sunk into endless oxygen. I got tired less. During the workouts, I felt more machine than man. Iron therapy taught me something fundamental. It reminded me why I was running; why I had stuck to this damn sport for four straight years. When I was anemic, I struggled to gather what little motivation I had for those painfully slow jogs in those parks. Putting the effort in, and seeing the dramatic results fooled my mind like a well-administered placebo. Iron therapy was the training wheels that would jump-start my dramatic improvement.

    It took four months—four months of iron pills, blood tests, and training—to get back to my personal best: the 5:46 mile that I had run the year before. Early February that year, the training wheels came off. I was running close to seven miles a day on my own. But I wasn’t counting. I could catch a light. I could walk as many stairs as I wanted without getting tired. I was even far ahead of where I was the year before. After two and a half years as a 5:50 miler, I finally had a breakthrough race. I ran a 5:30. I asked coach if I could eventually break 5 minutes. He told me to focus more on maintaining my fitness through spring break.

    I ran the mile again, this time outdoors. Coach had me seeded at a 5:30. I ran the first lap, holding back. I didn’t want to overextend myself. I hoped to squeeze by with a 5:35. The euphoria was unprecedented as I realized by the second lap that I was a dozen seconds ahead and still holding back. I finished with a 5:14.

    On the bus ride back from the meet, one of my long-standing dreams came true. I pretended to ignore Coach sitting next to me, but he kept on giving me glances. He was excited about my time. We talked a lot about the race. We talked about my continuous and dramatic improvement. He said it was early in the season and that I would break 5 minutes after only a few weeks of training.

    Six weeks later, Mr. Song, my chemistry teacher, asked me if I had broken 5 minutes for the mile yet. I told him all about how I had run in three meets over the past month and had failed to break 5:15 on every one of them. I told him that 5 minutes was now for me a mirage in the distance. Mr. Song, however, did not show much concern: “You’re just overtrained. Once you ease up before the big meet, you’ll drop in time once more.”

    Even though these consoling words were from the man who had baffled my nutritionist when he had guessed that I was anemic, I still doubted his wisdom. On Sunday, I would run the mile once. My last mile of the year. This was it. Using my tried-and-true racing strategy, I finished with a 5:02, a 12- second drop in time. Mr. Song’s predictions had again turned out to be correct.

    Before I was anemic, the correlation between hard work and success was something that only appeared in the cliché success stories of the talented few. Now, I am running more mileage than I ever have before. And my violin teacher still complains.

    But I smile. I know it’s going somewhere.

    John opens this essay by illustrating the iconic “grabber” done well: simple, unexpected, and leaving the reader wanting more. Is he actually “slow” at the violin (but that doesn’t quite make sense, does it)? We then learn all about John’s true passion: running.

    Although challenging (and not to mention the fact that he always finishes last), John has stuck with running for many years. Eventually, his “slowness” deteriorates to the point where he needs medical intervention and finds his kryptonite: iron. This magic mineral allows him to heal, excel in his running, and ultimately exceed his wildest expectations by almost breaking the 5-minute mark by a few seconds.

    The themes that permeate this essay are perseverance and tenacity: that all-powerful “grit” that distinguishes this student. John guides us through his story through the lens of his infallible work ethic. Even though he did not reach his exact goal, he is seconds away from it, and the reader knows he will keep pushing to achieve it.

    As a reader, I would love to hear more about what happens next. Is there another instance that demonstrates John’s persistence or has he applied this newfound confidence and self-awareness to other aspects of his life? This self-reflection section is the most important element of the essay as it allows admissions readers a window into what drives a student. It is important to develop this and “show” the evidence of how the student has changed or what they have learned from this experience.

    As the essay culminates, John makes us smile as he smiles (even though his violin teacher is still not too happy with him). We know John has learned to appreciate the beauty of the journey rather than the destination and we are just thrilled for him!

    Lora Lewis

    Soft Wooden Heart

    The backbone of my life is my writing desk. I like to describe its surface as an organized mess (despite my parents’ overdramatized description of a bomb site), a state of positive entropy and minimum energy. Math exercises overlap an organizer, set next to almost-empty tubes of paint and overdue library books. A constantly filled bottle of water sits behind a glasses’ case full of guitar picks, and carved into a mountain of paper, right in the middle, is a space reserved for my laptop—on days when I am slouching, The Complete Works of William Shakespeare needs to be slid under it. An eclectic desk shows an eclectic personality; mine has had the honor of being the training grounds prior to the Great (final) Battle (exam) of Chemistry, the peaceful meadow of relaxed reading afternoons, and all in all the pristine-turned-colorful canvas of an inquisitive mind.

    I remember buying it with my mother five years ago, when my bruised knees protested against the tiny white-paint-gone-yellow one I had used since childhood. My new desk was made of native Rimu heartwood—solid, resilient, dependable—a perfect role model for me to grow into. Over the years, its material became representative of my New Zealand identity, its surface slowly coated in quirky personality, and its compartments filled with treasured memories; the heartwood desk echoed my heart.

    At first, it did not fit with the decor of the rest of my room, which even now appears boxy and stark next to my grandiosely elegant writing desk, but its quiet strength is unafraid of individuality, just as I have learned to become. It has watched as I grew stronger branches, a straighter trunk, firmer roots; whereas I had once been but a shy young seedling, I sprouted leaves and with them the ability and yearning to provide shade for others. I have certainly physically grown into it, but although I would like to think that I have become completely independent, I remain human; in inevitable times of need, it is still my steadfast, sturdy desk that offers its support.

    I sit here and, well, I write: joyfully, desolately, irately, wistfully—at times paralyzed by excitement, at others crippled by fear. I scrawl notes in my organizer (which is, naturally, not in the least organized), words overflow my blog, overemotional oranges and blues plague my illustrations; shallow scratch marks indent the wood from where I have pressed too passionately into paper. It may be solid, but it is elastic enough to be shaped, resilient enough to adapt: This is my soft wooden heart.

    It can take it. My desk remains constant despite scars of experience—unassuming, stoic, ever watchful. Even when I dismembered dying cell phones, their frail key tones pleading for mercy, the desk stood there, nonchalant. Regardless of what fervor goes on from time to time, it knows there will eventually be a constant calm; my lively nest of rebuilt mobiles still calls this place home. Sometimes, I rest my uncertain head on its reassuring solid surface and the wood presses back into my heartbeat, communicating in Morse: “Don’t worry. Some things will never change.”

    And, like a mother, it always turns out to be right. Beneath my seemingly chaotic coat of papers and objects; beneath the superfluous, temporary things that define my present life, my desk and my heart remain still—solid, stable, and evergreen, ready to be written onto and scratched into by experience.

    Winnie’s piece shows us that a meaningful essay doesn’t have to be about a major accomplishment or a painful personal experience; oftentimes, the most inspired writing can evolve from something as simple and unexpected as a writing desk. Winnie’s essay is successful because it invites readers into her world, where we discover a smart, unique, and self-aware young woman. Through her “eclectic” desk, we see her interest in the arts, her academic prowess, and her challenges with procrastination. We glimpse her pride in her heritage, her struggles with self-doubt, and her faith in herself to adapt to change and embrace new experiences. By the final sentence, we feel that if we heard Winnie’s voice in a classroom or sat next to her in the library, we would recognize her right away.

    Winnie’s ability to bring herself to life through language also creates some challenges in her essay. She has so much to show us and does so in such creative ways that readers can feel overwhelmed by the information and figurative language that competes for our attention. Your college essay is a valuable opportunity to show who you are, but it’s not necessary to weave every aspect of your life into 650 words. For even the most gifted writers, less is often more.

    Spider Web Education

    Why a Republican Read The Communist Manifesto

    I am a conservative. Point-blank. I’m not talking “hardcore, no gay marriage, abortion equates to eternity in Hell, Catholicism is the only religion worthy of my acknowledgment” conservative, but I believe in limited government intervention in private business. I may seem like an unlikely candidate for such beliefs; I live in Springfield, Massachusetts, an urban environment where the majority of the population utilizes some sort of government assistance to supplement the costs of living. Well, maybe not the absolute majority, but I certainly see a lot of it. Though raised as a Catholic, I believe in nothing more than simple spirituality, and do not abide by all the stipulations of the strict Catholic community (although I do continue to attend church because I find the environment welcoming and the people overwhelmingly happy and uplifting). I attend the Drama Studio, a small, conservatory style acting community where I am considered the token Republican (artsy and conservative—is this what Harold Camping meant by the Rapture?) Not surprisingly, my colleagues have made many attempts at conversion (“Watch MSNBC, Danielle; I promise you’ll love it!”) But I stick to my guns— no pun intended. However, I have found that sharing the majority of my time with those of conflicting opinions has enlightened me in the ways of respect and compromise.

    Enter Jacob Mueller. Literally the son of a preacher man (his father is the minister at Trinity United Methodist Church), his political views on Facebook are listed as “Member of the Communist Party of America.” Oh, boy … He entered my Advanced Scene Work class in its second semester, and as is the Drama Studio custom, I welcomed him with open arms and commenced what I soon discovered to be the long and interesting process of getting to know him. Through this, I discovered a few important things; like me, he loved politics. Like me, he was well informed. And, like me, he was more than willing to argue his opinion.

    Through our Odd Couple dynamic, we found an endless number of conversation topics. Every day was a new, “Did you see what the Tea Party’s newest legislation entails?” countered by a, “How about that Scott Brown, eh?” I was the Michele Bachmann to his Al Gore. But the remarkable thing about our debates was not their intensity or their depth, but how much I was learning by listening to him talk.

    A strange thing was happening to me. For the girl who had always been staunchly opinionated and stubborn, who had never been one for agreeing with the opposition, who took pride in her ability to stand her ground even when she represented the minority view, compromise suddenly had a new meaning. Its connotation was no longer negative. And, in turn my ability to not only understand but also respect a view contradictory to my own was growing in strength. In order to foster this newfound mind-set, I presented myself with the ultimate challenge. In a moment of excited passion, I logged on to Amazon.com and, for $4.95, ordered a copy of The Communist Manifesto. The little book, with its floppy laminated cover depicting a hammer and a sickle on a glossy black background and plain white block letters spelling out its title with inconspicuous innocence, took its place at the head of my bed, where it resided for the next month. Bit by bit, it began to fill with marks of pensive notation, speckles of yellow appearing in odd places where the highlighter had bled through, its fragile pages curving with the insistent pen marks that filled their margins.

    As I devoured the words of Marx and Engels, I realized something remarkable. I’m not going to tell you I agreed with them; in a lot of instances, I didn’t. But I did understand what they were saying, and I was able to respect them both as visionaries and intellectuals. Where the old voice in my head would have said, “Wow, what idiots,” my new voice was open to more than just the fundamental ideas, but the intelligence it must have taken to form them and the thought process behind them.

    When I register to vote, I will not be registering as a Democrat. You won’t see me at any PETA meetings, and you certainly won’t hear me speaking fondly about President Obama’s plans for health care. But I can proudly say that The Communist Manifesto taught this Republican what it means to compromise, and to respect.

    Lessard's essay “works” and earned its author a spot at Harvard, yet it circumvents a general guideline of college essay writing by speaking directly about politics and religion—albeit in a funny and personal way. Lessard explains humorously and intimately her status as a curious conservative. If one is going to talk about controversial topics like politics in a college essay, avoid entirely (as this essay does—and even if you do make mention of The Communist Manifesto !) providing your own manifesto. The main problem with manifestoes is that they are not personal, but abstract. By contrast, the college essay needs to tell us all about you, ideally in an unforgettable, up-close, down-to-earth way. Nobody wants to read the RNC or DNC policy platform coughed up as an essay. Instead colleges want to get to know the real you.

    One way this essay could be improved might include providing more detail about what exactly Lessard found meaningful in the works of Marx and Engels. As it stands, the essay only touches on The Communist Manifesto in a cursory way despite Lessard's reading of that work being pivotal to the arc of the essay. Even another couple of sentences explaining the writer’s “respect” (Is it grudging admiration for the Marxist theory of history? Some element of the text’s social critique?) could deepen the essay’s analysis.

    Very effectively, however, Lessard positions herself in this essay as a person on an intellectual journey who is open to new ideas and experiences. This is an excellent posture to demonstrate to an admissions committee. College is all about learning—intellectually, socially, politically, and beyond—and colleges often find students irresistible when they are hellbent on learning to the utmost. Be an intellectual astronaut and demonstrate that in your college essay, as Lessard did quite effectively.

    HelloCollege

    I wrap my scarf more firmly around my neck, feeling the chill of the brisk January air as I trudge my way to practice. The bus stop isn’t actually that far from the pool, but with a heavy backpack and the fancy shoes that my host sister insisted I wear, the three-minute trek seems to last forever. Turning the corner three blocks down, I finally make it to the parking lot and see one of my friends.

    “Salut, Thomas.”

    He knows that it’s me without even looking. “Salut, Danielle.” He finishes fiddling with his bicycle lock and stands to greet me. I lean in for my customary kiss, and he obliges, bisous-ing me once on each cheek, before we walk toward Piscine Bréquigny together.

    Easy conversation flows between us as our well-trained feet follow the paths to our respective changing rooms. I punch in the code on the girls’ side and open the door. Familiar figures stand in various states of undress, and bisous go all around while we change and speculate on the various tortures Marc will put us through today. Then we head down to the pool deck, ready to meet our fates.

    I get to our coach first, and mentally switch back into English. “Hey, Marc, what’s up?”

    He shrugs. “Fine.”

    I laugh and give him a high five, then move on to bisous and ça va? the rest of the boys. When I get to Islem, who is Algerian, the two of us proceed to execute our exceedingly complex non-French secret handshake, recently perfected at Tours during last week’s three-day meet. (We foreigners have to stick together, after all.) We end with a perfect fist bump, and I smirk.

    Islem winks back at me. “Et ouais.” That’s how we roll.

    Marc eventually yells at us to get to work, and we all start to put on our caps and goggles. I pull out my team cap from home, reflecting on how much I’ve changed since I left. Four months ago, I was mute, standing awkwardly to the side, hoping that English instructions for the new and frightening social interaction would suddenly appear out of thin air. Now, flawless French rolls off my lips as I greet my friends, laughing freely at inside jokes, not thinking twice about kissing swimsuit-clad swimmers on the cheek. I’m not just on the team anymore—I’m part of it, and every single bisous reminds of that fact.

    Someone pushes me into the pool and my shriek is swallowed by the water. I surface and swear my revenge, glaring all the while at Pierre, the obvious culprit, who is grinning unabashedly. Then he yelps and falls as he himself is pushed in as well. The whole team eventually follows us into the water to start the day’s warm up, and a small smile, fond and content, flits across my face before I join them.

    One of the first pieces of advice that I share about what makes a strong essay is for a student to not overthink it. Not everybody needs to cure a disease by the time they turn 16 or have had a research paper published in a professional journal. Let me get to know who you are as a person – and it’s often the simplest day-to-day stories that help students do this most effectively.

    Admittedly, I’m not a big fan of athletes writing about sports (which often come across as thin and cliched) so I was bit trepidatious when I read the opening paragraph. I got over it quickly.

    Here are the notes I took while reading this essay:

    Opening: Sets the scene effectively, draws me in to want to learn more about her abroad experience, seems very friendly.

    Changing room / interplay with team: Comes across as personable with a fun sense of humor. Exchanges with coach and the conversations and handshakes with teammates show adaptability and an ability to bring people together.

    Practice / reflection moment: Spending four months away from home can be intimidating for most people, let alone a high schooler, and shows a true sense of commitment and perseverance. At the beginning of her trip she seemed scared and vulnerable but she learned to push past any initial anxiety and now presents herself as self-aware and appreciative.

    End: She has grown from this abroad experience and her spirit, likability and sense of camaraderie are evident.

    When I read an interesting and descriptive essay like this, it’s almost like I’m drawn into a mini-movie. I want to keep reading to see how things play out. By the end, I feel like I know the student and I have a sense of how their unique personal attributes would make them an appealing candidate to any college admissions officer.

    Sponsored by Dan Lichterman : As an admission essay specialist, Dan Lichterman has been empowering students to find their voice since 2004. He helps students stand out on paper, eliminating the unnecessary so the necessary may speak. Drawing upon his storytelling background, Dan guides applicants to craft authentic essays that leap off the page. He is available for online writing support within the US and internationally. To learn more and schedule a brief complimentary consultation visit danlichterman.com .

    Dan Lichterman

    A light breeze caressing the cornfield makes it look like a gentle swaying sea of gold under the ginger sun of late summer. A child’s chime-like laughter echoes. As I rush through the cornfield, I hear the rustling of leaves and the murmur of life hidden among the stems that tower over me.

    I remember the joy of the day when I solved one of my first difficult combinatorics problems at my parents’ house in the countryside. I felt so exhilarated that I ran outside and into the cornfield. As I was passing row after row of stems, I realized the cornfield was actually a giant matrix with thousands of combinations of possible pathways, just like the combinatorics problem I had just solved. I looked at the sky and I thought about the great mathematicians of the past that contributed so much to this field and about how I have added yet another dimension to my matrix. Suddenly, mathematics appeared to me as a 3D live map where staggering arrays of ideas connect each other by steady flows of sheer wisdom.

    Suddenly a loud laughter from the next room wakes me up from my reverie. I am back in my room in the drab dormitory where I lived since I was fifteen. The dim sunset barely lightens up my room, while the cold November wind rushes from the broken-and-mended-with-tape window on the hallway, whistling beneath my door. My roommates haven’t returned yet, and I feel alone and isolated.

    In moments such as these I always take out the ultimate weapon against gloominess: the picture of my family. I look at myself, my parents, my little sister, and my grandfather at the countryside, under a clear blue sky, hugging, sharing the joy of being together. It reminds me of the old times, when life was simpler, but it also reminds me of why I came to Bucharest to live in a dormitory. It was because mathematics fascinated me with its beautiful and intricate theories and configurations, and my parents and my family supported me 150 percent. They put in long hours at work to pay for school costs and they selflessly accepted my long absences. I decided then to honor their support, follow our common dream, and become an accomplished mathematician.

    Finally today I consider I matched at least an infinitesimal part of my parents’ work. After countless Olympiad stages and fierce selection programs, I managed to win a gold medal at the International Mathematical Olympiad, along with scoring what is called “an ace”: getting gold medals in the National Olympiad, the Balkan Olympiad, and the International Olympiad.

    Math, for me, is a vast map of knowledge where theories intersect each other like pathways in a cornfield, and that explains the laws of nature and the universe itself. However, no matter what mathematical sphere shall I soar in, I will always have my family with me and the joy of that day when I was running freely in the cornfield.

    Octav’s essay succeeds through its sophisticated use of narrative shift and juxtaposition. He transforms a youthful pastoral image of running through a cornfield into a wholly unexpected and exhilarating mathematical epiphany. The metaphor proves effective by merging his richly tactile experience with a cognitive experience that is maximally abstract: navigating a matrix of thousands of combinatorial pathways. Within this reverie, we see Octav’s intellectual freedom and ability to lose himself in both the contributions of great thinkers and his own original insights.

    After leading the reader into his experience of pure mathematical reasoning, the essay takes a deft biographical turn. Through Octav’s austere study in a drab Bucharest boarding school we realize for the first time just how far he has travelled and how much has been sacrificed for his dream of becoming a mathematician. The cornfield takes on further dimensionality, now representing both a nostalgic connection to his family and the unbounded expansiveness that accompanies the life of the mind. When Octav mentions his mathematical “ace” it is almost besides the point–we already wholly believe in the promise of his curiosity-driven journey.

    Please beware of fraud schemes by third parties falsely using our company and imprint names to solicit money and personal information. Learn More .

    Macmillan

    Book details

    50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, 5th Edition

    What Worked for Them Can Help You Get into the College of Your Choice

    Author: Staff of the Harvard Crimson

    50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, 5th Edition

    M ICHAEL B ERVELL Hometown : Mukilteo, Washington, USA High School : Public school, 550 students in graduating class Ethnicity : Black, African American Gender : Male GPA : 3.9 out of 4.0 SAT : Reading 800, Math 800, Writing 800 ACT : 35 SAT Subject Tests Taken : Mathematics Level 1, Mathematics Level 2, Physics, World History Extracurriculars : Student body president; newspaper editor in chief; varsity debate captain; Hugs for Ghana (nonprofit) cofounder and executive director; GMAZ Jazz Quartet cofounder, drummer, and manager Awards : International Build-a-Bear Workshop Huggable Heroes Award, National Bank of America Student Leader Delegate, Evergreen Boys State Delegate and Governor, National Radio Disney Hero for Change Award, National Achievement Scholar, National Coca-Cola Scholar Major : Philosophy and Computer Science ESSAY “A-one,” I adjust my earphones. “A-two,” I wipe the sweat off my sticks. “A-one-two-three-four!” The sharp rhythm of Mr. Dizzy Gillespie’s iconic bebop tune “Salt Peanuts” rattles through my head like saline seeds as I silently count myself off. Then—without a hitch—Gillespie, his quintet, and I are off. My left foot taps the AP biology textbook, my sticks bounce along the metal frame of my bed, and my soul dances to the beat I am creating. This makeshift drum set is a liberating entrance into an abstract world where I am free to express myself. As I sit on the edge of my bed imitating the monophonic flow of drummer Max Roach, I close my eyes and envision myself performing onstage with world-renowned Gillespie. We stand before thousands of people, steeped in the spotlight’s brilliant glare, and as we play my arms become a flurry of motion when, suddenly, crack ! I snap back into reality and my eyes shoot open only to realize that the moment of pure ecstasy had been interrupted—another broken drumstick! Smiling, I pick up the pieces and walk toward a worn, old, black Ikea desk in the corner of my room. Since 5th grade, my DrumDrawer has been the keeper of every pair of new and broken drumsticks I have ever owned. I pull open the big bottom drawer and stand admiring the sacred splinters for a brief moment before finally dropping in this latest offering. The sticks in my small pine sepulcher illustrate the quintessential facets of who I am—a musician, leader, and philanthropist. While most people typically collect rocks or baseball cards, I collect musical phrases from my life and store them in this drawer. As I reach to the bottom, my fingers wrap around two white Vic Firth sticks. Rubbing my fingers along the bumps on the wood, I grin. This exclusive pair shared my accomplishments of playing jazz under the Eiffel Tower in Paris, drumming in award-winning spring musicals, and being inducted into the National Tri-M Music Honor Society. Moreover, these sticks not only inspired me to persevere as I cofounded, managed, and drummed in the GMAZ Jazz Quartet, but they also instilled confidence in me when I needed it most. After I decided to run for Student Body President of my 2,200-student high school in what turned out to be a competitive election against two of my closest friends, these tattered drumsticks soothed and comforted me. Despite turbulent weeks of campaigning and preparing a daunting school-wide campaign speech, I always looked forward to returning to my bedroom and playing my favorite jazz melodies. The ups and downs of musical arrangements never failed to strike a chord. Reminiscing, I twirl the white drumsticks between my fingers and realize that they also profoundly influenced my view of service. Once a month, these wooden wonders and I would trek from my desk to the local retirement home where we performed with other musicians in monthly “Play-It-Forward” retirement home concerts. On these Friday nights, my sticks danced on the drums, our music floated throughout the concert hall, elderly faces glowed, and I was free to let out my creative exuberance. In organizing dozens of these events, I have shared with both peers and audience members my own musical definition of altruism. I return my Vic Firth sticks to the drawer and contentedly appreciate the collection of memories. While the wooden contents physically have no other value than, perhaps, kindling a small fire, I cannot bear to part with them. Someday the sticks will go, I realize, but the music will not. Fresh pair of sticks in hand, I slowly shut the DrumDrawer, return to my bed, and count myself off, eyes closed, to John Coltrane’s jazz rendition of “My Favorite Things” by Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein. “A-one, a-two, a-one-two-three-four!” REVIEW Right from the introduction, readers are thrown into the vibrant and colorful world that Michael’s essay creates. Passion for a musical instrument is a topic that is doubtlessly written about by many applicants, but Michael differentiates himself by using his passion for drumming to demonstrate his stylistic flair, cleverly finding ways to discuss his other, non-musical accomplishments and pursuits. Michael clearly aims to communicate that he is a “musician, leader, and philanthropist” throughout his essay—a goal he successfully accomplishes. His musical talent and passion come alive through the vivid imagery and onomatopoeia that he uses. To demonstrate leadership, he shows how he dealt with a difficult situation maturely. Finally, his dedication to volunteer work is seamlessly worked into the essay when he recalls playing concerts at a retirement home. Michael roots the essay in the physical space of his bedroom, but chooses a place that allows him to be creative and cover a lot of aspects of himself that might not be accessible in other parts of his application. The full-circle ending is a nice touch to further root the essay in the prompt. Michael does a wonderful job of demonstrating that you don’t need a particularly unique topic to create a memorable essay. —Mia Karr J ANG L EE Hometown : Flower Mound, Texas, USA High School : Public school, 816 students in graduating class Ethnicity : Asian Gender : Male GPA : 4.0 out of 4.0 SAT : Reading 800, Math 740, Writing 790 ACT : n/a SAT Subject Tests Taken : Mathematics Level 2, Chemistry Extracurriculars : President of art club / National Art Honor Society, vice president of Science National Honor Society, founding member and vice president of creative engagement and design for 501(c)3 nonprofit Raise4aCause, volunteer at church summer school Awards : PSAT semifinalist, Welch Summer Scholar, 1 Scholastic Silver Key and 2 Gold Keys, artwork exhibited at the Texas Legislative Budget Board and part of the Texas Art Education Association traveling exhibition, Gold Seal at UIL Texas art competition (highest possible award given to .6% of artworks out of over twenty thousand submissions) Major : Visual and Environmental Studies ESSAY Like it does on most nights, the smell of toxic fumes drifts through my room. Occasionally washing my paintbrushes in turpentine oil thinner, I am uncomfortably aware that these vapors can cause brain damage, lung cancer, and chronic respiratory problems. My lifelong passion is killing me— literally. Yet, this smell is strangely comforting. It blankets me with a sense of security I find nowhere else. An artist at the core, my paint-smeared heart pumps pigments of red through veins and arteries—the love for painting permeates every part of my body and has transformed me. By constantly observing subtle details of objects, breathtaking spectrums of color, and the interactions of lights and darks, my perception of the world has shifted. I walk down the school hallway during passing period. Carried by a stream of teenage bodies, I notice ceiling lights scattering among clothes and locks of glossy hair. Looking down, shadows crisscross and overlap on the laminated floor to create a kaleidoscope of dancing silhouettes. Faces draw my attention—delicate hues of rosy pink on tips of ears and softly chiseled curves of bone. I observe my surroundings from an artist’s perspective, fully immersed in a state of perpetual learning. Ultimately, my goal as an artist is to give my art personal, profound depth that transcends aesthetic purpose or technical skill. Paintings do not have to be of flowers or landscapes; they can portray story, emotion, and experience. Consequently, my art is inspired by personal experiences and observations. I hope to convey a fresh perspective of my life through strokes of color. The ambition of creating depth in my art forces me to reflect on myself as I continually ask why I am painting what I am painting. And because of the rigorous reflection of my values and experiences, I am given a greater sense of self-identity. This overwhelming position as an artist is humbling, teaching me an appreciation for self-worth often neglected or trivialized in a fast-paced American lifestyle. I want to show others this same value through my art so they can slow down to recognize and appreciate the value of their own lives. Wonderland Unknown, a painting based on my favorite childhood story, Alice in Wonderland, depicts a rabbit in a forest of overgrown mushrooms and twisted trees. The piece builds on the idea that children’s innate creativity and capacity for imagination are stifled as they mature. Growing up, I began to feel estranged from the tale because it turned unrealistically ridiculous, a personal testimony to the slow deterioration of childhood wonder. Painting Wonderland Unknown was an epiphany—I realized that creativity is inherent: a universal thread within all of us that stitches humanity together. Most importantly, it is a trait that should be nurtured and valued instead of taken for granted. Truly, art is a world of possibility and a world I would like to share. It is a place where one is encouraged to break rules, be unapologetically audacious, and take pride in unorthodoxy. Ready to play creator of my universe, I rule with brush in one hand and palette in the other, painting because of a chance to explore this liberating world and discover myself through it. And in the end, art will always stay a constant in my life, forever my private sanctuary of creativity and personal expression. A place where I am infinite. I feel relieved knowing that the smell of turpentine will always comfort me. It is a thin, oily smell of ironic undertones, vaguely nauseating and coffee-ground bitter. It is a smell that has given me life. REVIEW Jang’s essay is filled with beautiful phrasing and flowery descriptions, which shows off his writing skills and creativity. One of the biggest strengths of the essay is how Jang pairs explanation of art’s function in his life with an artistic analysis of the piece Wonderland Unknown . Being able to write exceedingly well in a distinctive narrative form proves to be a strength for Jang. His essay weds two distinct types of writing—narrative and analytical—together, which is the very essence of what a good college essay should be. But, rather than present a single, overarching narrative, the writer takes the reader through separate vignettes: a crowded hallway, his work space at home, the scene depicted in the painting—all of which combine to provide a distinct and colorful look into the writer’s relationship with art. —Brandon J. Dixon Copyright © 2017 by the Staff of The Harvard Crimson

    50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, 5th Edition

    Buy This Book From:

    Reviews from goodreads, about this book, book details.

    Fifty all-new essays that got their authors into Harvard - with updated statistics, analysis, and complete student profiles - showing what worked, what didn’t, and how you can do it, too. With talented applicants coming from top high schools as well as the pressure to succeed from family and friends, it’s no wonder that writing college application essays is one of the most stressful tasks high schoolers face. To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays , edited by the staff of the Harvard Crimson , gives readers the most inspiring approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, the nation’s top-ranked college. From chronicling personal achievements to detailing unique talents, the topics covered in these essays open applicants up to new techniques to put their best foot forward. It teaches students how to: - Get started - Stand out - Structure the best possible essay - Avoid common pitfalls Each essay in this collection is from a Harvard student who made the cut, is accompanied by a student profile that includes SAT scores and grades, and is followed by a detailed analysis by the staff of the Harvard Crimson that shows readers how they can approach their own stories and ultimately write their own high-caliber essay. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays ’ all-new examples and straightforward advice make it the first stop for college applicants who are looking to craft essays that get them accepted to the school of their dreams.

    Imprint Publisher

    St. Martin's Griffin

    9781250127563

    About the Creators

    Harvard Essays Examples

    Harvard essays examples .

    One of the most important parts of the college application process is the essay section. Especially when you’re looking at applying to Harvard , or any of the Ivy League schools, your essays need to stand out. Looking at Harvard essays examples can help give you an idea of Harvard essays that worked and stood out to the admissions team.

    Many students find the Harvard essays, or any school’s essays, to be the most stressful part of applying. Reading plenty of Harvard essays examples can help to alleviate that stress. Understanding strong points of Harvard essays that worked will allow you to craft the most competitive application possible. 

    In this Harvard Essays Example article, we’ll look at: 

    • The Harvard essay requirements, from topic to word count
    • Various Harvard essays examples from past years
    • How to approach, plan, and write the Harvard essays
    • What admissions officers look for in Harvard essays
    • Advice for transfer essays

    Before we dive into some Harvard essays that worked, let’s understand the Harvard essay requirements. 

    How many essays do you have to write for Harvard?

    Harvard requires applicants to complete a total of six essays: five supplemental essays and the personal statement . The personal statement prompt will be based on the application platform you are using, such as the Common Application or Coalition Application. Most students use the Common App platform and complete the Common App essay , choosing the prompt that most speaks to them. 

    In addition to the personal statement, students must also submit five short answer Harvard application essays. Each of these Harvard essays has a 200 word maximum. This article focuses on Harvard essays examples for those shorter essays.

    What are the Harvard essay requirements?

    We know that applicants are required to complete the Common App personal statement in addition to five Harvard essay prompts. Now, we’ll take a look at the current Harvard essay prompts. However, keep in mind that the Harvard essays can change. Be sure to double check the admissions site for the most up-to-date information. 

    Here are the current Harvard essay prompts: 

    Harvard University Essay Prompts

    1. harvard has long recognized the importance of enrolling a diverse student body. how will the life experiences that shape who you are today enable you to contribute to harvard, 2. briefly describe an intellectual experience that was important to you. , 3. briefly describe any of your extracurricular activities, employment experience, travel, or family responsibilities that have shaped who you are., 4. how do you hope to use your harvard education in the future, 5. top 3 things your roommates might like to know about you. .

    Next, we’re going to look at some Harvard essays that worked. Keep in mind that reading and analyzing Harvard essay examples can be very helpful when writing your own college essays. These Harvard essay examples, even if not for current essay prompts, can provide insights into writing outstanding essays to impress Harvard admissions. 

    Harvard Diversity Essay Examples

    All universities want to have a diverse student body. Diversity brings unique perspectives to campus that can promote important conversations. In recent years, more and more universities have students write a diversity or community essay . 

    Let’s take a look at the first of our Harvard essays examples, which writes about diversity at Harvard. 

    Harvard has long recognized the importance of enrolling a diverse student body. How will the life experiences that shape who you are today enable you to contribute to Harvard? 

    I have spent most of my life living in a 41% minority town of 1.8 square miles called Highland Park, NJ. HP has convinced me that we can build institutions that are strong and united while embracing a wide variety of voices and perspectives. It has shaped my core values of diversity and inclusion. An English teacher used to encourage me to talk in front of the class by saying even if I believed my thoughts were “dumb,” I could only enrich the conversation. From my experiences debating in Model UN conferences, I have grown accustomed to being able to present viewpoints from both sides of the argument and to being able to incorporate and respect the viewpoints of all sides of an issue before making up my own mind. 

    At Harvard, I will seek to continue my contributions as an active participant in the community and look to actively provide unique perspectives and insights. I will actively participate in student life and engage in public service, such as helping provide after-school tutoring and joining health awareness campaigns. I look forward to a new set of unique experiences at Harvard University.

    Why this essay worked

    In this diversity essay, the student does an excellent job of clearly and specifically answering the prompt. The use of statistics and experiences specific to the student’s hometown makes it clear that this is no generic response. Additionally, the statistics support the student’s point that they come from a diverse community, while their examples illustrate their character. 

    Later, the student speaks about how they have shared their unique perspectives. While doing this, the student also shows that they are active in extracurriculars. Furthermore, they show that they are able to bring their learnings from debating in Model UN into the real world. 

    Finally, the student shows how they will bring diversity to Harvard’s campus. Admissions teams want to know how you’ll positively impact their campus. This student specifically states how they will be an active member of the student body and Harvard community. Clear goals and areas of interest are a common feature of successful Harvard essays examples.

    Harvard Essay Example – Intellectual Experience

    To get into a competitive school like Harvard University , students will need to do much more than simply meet the Harvard requirements. This is where your Harvard essays come into play. Each of the Harvard application essays should show that you are a motivated, curious person, especially the intellectual experience essay. 

    Now, let’s take a look at the second of the Harvard essay examples:

    Briefly describe an intellectual experience that was important to you. 

    One of the most valuable experiences I have had was at the Rutgers University WINLAB internship. While I was moderately fluent in many programming languages like Java and C++, I rarely utilized those skills in a real-life setting. In the First Person View Self-Driving Car project, we had to code and revise programs to control the car from our computers effectively. I found the application of computing theory in this project to be much more sophisticated than I anticipated, and some model revisions that would work in theory did not produce the anticipated result. 

    From this experience, I realized that the real-life applications in STEM are much more sophisticated and challenging to work out than expected. From my two summers at the Harvard Summer School, I was impressed by the depth of the courses I’ve taken. In Introduction to C++ for Programmers (CSCI 3-38), we built our own games through C++ as the final project, which concurs with the highly practical nature of Harvard University’s curriculums. This gives me tremendous confidence that Harvard University is where I can learn the skills I need to prosper. I’m looking forward to new intellectual experiences at Harvard University!

    The second of the Harvard essay prompts gives students a lot of room to play with their responses. An “intellectual experience” can mean many things, but it’s a great opportunity to speak to your academic interests. Harvard essays that worked have talked about everything from research experiences to mentorship to self-initiated projects. Ultimately, admissions officers should be able to see that you are driven, curious, and passionate about your topic.

    In this essay, the writer shows that they have taken the time to get involved in internships within their field of interest: computer science and programming. By explaining how their experience impacted their real life, the writer shows how the intellectual experience was important to them. Specifically, this student had the important experience of realizing that some things worked in theory, however, not in practice—an important realization especially when working in the STEM field.

    Remember that Harvard essays examples strive to provide a full picture of the applicant. This writer not only shares with us their interest in computer science, but also how they’ve grown. It shows that they are willing and ready to try new approaches and expand their horizons.

    Harvard Extracurricular Essay Example

    Within the Harvard essay requirements, you’ll notice that many of the Harvard essay prompts are similar to what you’ll find on other college applications. Among those popular prompts is the extracurricular essay . This can be a tricky one to answer in a way that isn’t cliché but demonstrates your character.

    Let’s see how the third of the Harvard essays examples answers the prompt:

    Briefly describe any of your extracurricular activities, employment experience, travel, or family responsibilities that have shaped who you are.

    My first encounter with the Red Cross club was during the challenging COVID year, when I stepped up as a freshman and took the position of treasurer. My first blood drive experience being marked by masks, social distancing, and low turnout among donors. Needless to say, it was not the greatest first high school service experience for me, and I admittedly started to doubt if the time I spent on this front was worth it. 

    However, as we returned in person, things quickly turned around. As the vice president of the club, I helped recruit more than twice the club membership compared to the previous year, and our blood drives regained form; our blood targets have been exceeded every time since. Organizing and participating in blood drives has become a passion. It’s fulfilling, especially when I personally donate, to know that I’m actively serving the community and saving lives. Despite my relatively young age, I am capable of making an impact through public service. I plan to continue my commitment to the Red Cross’s adult program and participate in service programs like the Phillips Brooks House Association to serve the local Harvard community and abroad.

    Similar to all of the Harvard essay prompts, this one allows students many ways to answer. The student mentions their position as vice president of the Red Cross club, which shows their capacity and willingness to take on a leadership role. They also highlighted the doubt they faced, demonstrating an instance of overcoming a challenge.

    These Harvard essay prompts ask about formative experiences you’ve had beyond the classroom to demonstrate what kind of impact you’ll have on campus. This student does an excellent job of specifying the type of extracurricular activity that they plan to get involved in at Harvard: Phillips Brooks House Association. By mentioning the specific club, we know the student has done their research and knows their extracurricular interests. Furthermore, the club they choose is service-based, similar to the Red Cross club that forms the foundation of the essay.

    Using Your Harvard Education Essay

    In the other Harvard essays examples, students show the qualities that they will bring to campus. The fourth of the Harvard essay prompts differs in that it asks students to think about their life after college. Harvard essays that worked for prompts like this speak to both career and larger life goals.

    Here is the fourth of our Harvard essays that worked: 

    How do you hope to use your Harvard education in the future? 

    I envision my education at Harvard as not just a pursuit of knowledge but also a commitment to leveraging that knowledge for meaningful impact. The diverse and collaborative nature of the Harvard community will play a pivotal role in shaping my perspective and helping me establish the strong connections needed to achieve my goals. 

    Whether through research initiatives or entrepreneurial ventures, I see myself at the forefront of positive and meaningful change. Harvard University’s education is sophisticated and includes many initiatives that help students including research opportunities (AM 91R & AM 99R) and courses such as Advanced Scientific Computing (APMTH 207). Machine learning, a pivotal technological frontier, stands among many topics shaping the future of technology—an area I am eager to explore. APMTH 207 aligns with my interest in data analysis and optimization, and the highly practical nature of model development will be helpful for any potential job in the future. 

    I have already applied skills learned from the Harvard Summer School to real-life applications, and I’m confident a Harvard University education will help me do similar. I hope to my skills and knowledge to contribute to a more inclusive, equitable, and sustainable world.

    Harvard wants their students to go on to make big impacts in the world. Basically, the fourth of these Harvard essays examples wants to see that you’re motivated, driven, and forward-thinking. This student does an excellent job of clearly and specifically stating how Harvard will allow them to achieve their future goals. 

    Through this essay, we see that the student has done research on specific course offerings that they plan to take advantage of during their time at Harvard University. And, while the student isn’t positive what kind of career they might have, we know that they are committed to an “inclusive, equitable, and sustainable world.” Even if you aren’t certain of your intended major yet, you can talk about how Harvard will create opportunities for you.

    It’s easy to talk solely about academic or career goals in this essay. However, the best Harvard essays examples show how you can contribute to society. What kind of world do you want to help create, and how can Harvard help you get there?

    Harvard Roommate Essay

    The last of the Harvard essays examples strays slightly from the “typical” college essay prompt. The last of the Harvard essay prompts asks students to reflect on qualities they’d like to share with future roommates. You may have seen similar prompts at other universities. The Harvard roommate essay is a great opportunity to highlight your uniqueness.

    Here is the fifth of the Harvard essays examples:

    Top 3 things your roommates might like to know about you.

    I will definitely let my roommates know that I do not like bread. I have had a psychological impediment to the smell and taste of bread ever since I was sent to the ER when I was six because I ate a piece of rotten bread. Please be aware, future roommates, of keeping the bread contained outside the dorm room unless in extraordinary circumstances. 

    On a lighter note, my roommates should know that I am a relatively organized person who very much values personal space. I would prefer for all of my roommates to come together to organize basic protocols, such as which areas in the dorm are personal and which are public, and to be on the same page on important issues such as sleeping schedules. 

    One last thing I’d like my roommates to know about me is that I am a huge card game enjoyer. Blackjack, Poker, Hearts, etc., and even games outside the poker deck such as Uno are games that I love. It’d be great if my roommates shared a similar interest and we could have some nice entertainment during our free time.

    This student clearly, concisely, and creatively approaches this Harvard roommate essay. Through this student’s Harvard roommate essay we learn quite a bit about the writer. We know that they are organized and respect others’ personal space, while also being friendly and open to bonding through games. We also learn some quirky qualities that this person has, such as not tolerating bread in closed quarters. 

    Beyond the surface-level information, let’s look more closely at the tone. The first paragraph is ironically serious, using phrases like “psychological impediment” and “please be aware.” Taking this tone about something like not liking bread opens the essay with a note of humor, which can leave a lasting impression on an admissions officer. Many Harvard essays that worked have made their mark with the writer’s tone and voice.

    How do you write a Harvard essay?

    The Harvard essays play an important role in the narrative that you’re telling with your application. The previous Harvard essays examples show that it’s important to be true to who you are while completely answering the Harvard essay prompts. Of course, following the Harvard essay requirements is important—you must answer all five of the Harvard essay prompts within 200 words. 

    Harvard admissions states that they use a holistic evaluation, meaning they consider the whole student and how they’ve experienced the world around them. Think of the Harvard essays not as a challenge, but as an opportunity! They are your chance to speak to your unique strengths, qualities, goals, and experiences. You can expand on activities from other parts of your application or, better yet, introduce new experiences that align with your narrative.

    When responding to the Harvard essay prompts, try to share new information. If you decide to expand upon something you’ve already mentioned, be sure to go deeper than before. Show how the experiences, extracurriculars, and academics have impacted you, and how you’ll bring those lessons to Harvard and beyond.

    As with all college essays, be sure to get a second (or third, or fourth!) pair of eyes on your Harvard application essays. You want to be sure your Harvard essays are free of grammatical and spelling errors. Additionally, you should ask for feedback from friends and mentors who know you well. They can tell you if your essays sound like your voice and are true to your character.

    Does Harvard require a personal statement?

    In addition to the five short answer Harvard essays, students must also write the personal statement as a part of the Harvard essay requirements. Again, this essay is an opportunity to add to your application as a whole. Harvard urges students to write about something you care about, rather than focusing on what you think admissions wants to read. 

    Here are the Common App essay prompts that you can choose from in the 2024–2025 admissions cycle:

    Common App Essay Prompts

    1. some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. if this sounds like you, then please share your story., 2. the lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. how did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience, 3. reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. what prompted your thinking what was the outcome, 4. reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. how has this gratitude affected or motivated you , 5. discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others., 6. describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. why does it captivate you what or who do you turn to when you want to learn more, 7. share an essay on any topic of your choice. it can be one you’ve already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design..

    Students may also complete the Coalition Application when applying to Harvard, which has its own personal statement topics. Despite technical differences between the two platforms, they serve the same purpose: to help you show your best self to admissions committees. Do your research and choose the best platform for you.

    What does Harvard look for in essays?

    The Harvard essays are an opportunity for applicants to share more about themselves that hasn’t been featured elsewhere in the application. You can see what Harvard is interested in from the Harvard essay prompts. According to the Harvard essay prompts, Harvard looks for values such as diversity, intellectual interests, community involvement, self reflection, and personal development. When thinking about your personal narrative , try to show how you exhibit each of these values throughout your application.

    All of the Harvard essays examples we reviewed answered each of the prompts in its entirety with specific answers. You don’t want to give generic responses when writing your Harvard essays. For example, in the Harvard roommate essay, the reader should learn more about your unique personality and experiences. In fact, the Harvard roommate essay is an excellent opportunity to show off your writing skills and voice. 

    Applicants also want to highlight how their experiences and backgrounds have shaped who they are. What will you bring to Harvard? How will Harvard help you achieve both your academic and professional goals? As you can see from the Harvard essays examples, your Harvard essays should be personal and specific.

    Tips for International Applicants to Harvard

    The application process for international appl i cants is almost identical to first-year applicants. The Harvard essay requirements and other application materials are mostly the same. The biggest difference is that international students need a visa or other required documents to study in the US. This is not unique to Harvard; international applicants should always research required documentation for American college admissions .

    When it comes to the Harvard essays examples, they can be equally useful to international students as domestic students. However, international students will likely want to highlight their background and how it will affect their educational experience in the US. Overall, admissions wants to see the same things from international students as those applying within the US. Show that you care about community, are intellectually curious and motivated, and have ambitions to positively impact the world long after graduation. 

    Harvard Transfer Essay Advice

    Gaining admissions to Harvard is difficult, whether as a first year or transfer student. However, acceptance as a transfer student is even more selective. Each year, Harvard accepts an average of 12 transfer students out of over 1,500 applicants. Therefore, writing the best transfer Harvard essays is crucial if you want to have a chance at being accepted. 

    The Harvard essays examples are good resources to get you started. The Harvard essay prompts are the same for transfer students as first year students. However, you will want to include your experiences at the university level when writing your Harvard application essays. How will Harvard help you meet your academic and professional goals? Why is Harvard the best place for you—what programs and extracurriculars make Harvard your dream school ? As a transfer student, don’t speak negatively about your current school. 

    Do your best to craft the best application possible to overcome the sub-1% transfer admission rate. However, the best way to ensure your transfer admissions process is a success is to have other schools on your college list ! The applicant pool to Harvard is beyond competitive—all students will have high grades and outstanding extracurricular records. Therefore, the Harvard essays are an important way to help you stand out and personalize your transfer application. 

    More CollegeAdvisor resources about Harvard

    In addition to this Harvard Essays Examples article, CollegeAdvisor has plenty of resources to help you learn how to get into Harvard. While it’s useful to look at Harvard essays examples, you should also check out our Harvard supplemental essay guide . You’ll get plenty of useful advice on how to craft your own Harvard essays. Additionally, take a look at our How to Get Into Harvard guide to learn how to boost your chances of gaining admissions to this selective school. 

    Since Harvard is an Ivy League university, you can also look at some Ivy League essay examples in addition to these Harvard essays examples. You’ll find more Harvard essays that worked as well as other successful Ivy League admissions essays. Reading Ivy League and Harvard essays examples is a great way to get in a good mindset before writing. Studying Harvard essays examples can help inspire you to write your best Harvard application essays. 

    Understanding acceptance rates can also help you prepare for the college admissions process. Harvard is among the most selective colleges in the nation. While this shouldn’t necessarily deter you from applying, your college list should have a good balance of reach, match, and safety schools . 

    Being prepared is the best way to tackle your college admissions journey. Therefore, learn all you can about your top schools of interest. In addition to reading Harvard essays examples and Harvard essays that worked, learn about the Harvard acceptance rate before applying. 

    Harvard Essays Examples – 5 Takeaways

    We’ve looked at five different Harvard essays that worked and analyzed why they are model Harvard essays examples. To review, let’s look at five takeaways from these Harvard essays examples:

    5 Takeaways for Harvard Essay Examples

    1. follow the harvard requirements.

    This applies to every part of the application, but always carefully read and complete the requirements by the specified deadline. The Harvard requirements for the essay portion include writing the personal statement as well as five supplemental essays. Don’t forget the word count, especially when you reach the editing phase.

    2. Be specific

    You’ll notice from the Harvard essays examples that each writer is specific in their responses. You certainly won’t find generic essays when looking at Harvard essays that worked. Reference specific courses, clubs, resources, and other opportunities you’re interested in that are found only at Harvard. 

    3. Get personal

    You’ll need to do some self reflection when writing your Harvard application essays. Think about aspects of your upbringing that have shaped you as well as other experiences. In the Harvard essays examples we learn more about each writer’s unique personality. Harvard essays that worked show the writer’s core values and interests to Harvard admissions officers.

    4. Harvard is competitive

    This may seem obvious, but Harvard is one of the most competitive schools in the nation. Harvard essays that worked helped students get the attention of admissions; however, evaluations of applicants are holistic. So while knockout essays are undeniably crucial to your application, so is a track record of academic and extracurricular achievement. 

    5. Start early

    As with all aspects of the college application journey, preparing early will help you do your best. Give yourself plenty of time to write, review, and revise these essays with the help of peers and mentors. The Harvard essays examples we looked at certainly weren’t written overnight. Nearly all Harvard essays that worked took quite a few drafts to get it right.

    A large part of knowing how to get into Harvard is knowing how to write clear, concise, impactful essays. Reading plenty of Harvard essays that worked can help you get inspired. In the end, your essays will likely be very different from Harvard essays examples, since every student has a unique story to tell.

    If you’re feeling overwhelmed by these Harvard essays examples and want some personalized guidance in college admissions, CollegeAdvisor is here to help! We have expert advisors that have helped thousands of students get into the school of their dreams. They’ve even guided many students to write their own Harvard essays that worked. Reach out to us to find an admissions expert to help you today.

    This article was written by Sarah Kaminski. Looking for more admissions support? Click here to schedule a free meeting with one of our Admissions Specialists. During your meeting, our team will discuss your profile and help you find targeted ways to increase your admissions odds at top schools. We’ll also answer any questions and discuss how CollegeAdvisor.com can support you in the college application process.

    Personalized and effective college advising for high school students.

    • Advisor Application
    • Popular Colleges
    • Privacy Policy and Cookie Notice
    • Student Login
    • California Privacy Notice
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Your Privacy Choices

    By using the College Advisor site and/or working with College Advisor, you agree to our updated Terms and Conditions and Privacy Policy , including an arbitration clause that covers any disputes relating to our policies and your use of our products and services.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Harvard University

    35 Harvard Essays That Worked

    Updated for the 2024-2025 admissions cycle.

    .css-1l736oi{display:-webkit-box;display:-webkit-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-webkit-align-items:center;-webkit-box-align:center;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;gap:var(--chakra-space-4);font-family:var(--chakra-fonts-heading);} .css-1dkm51f{border-radius:var(--chakra-radii-full);border:1px solid black;} .css-1wp7s2d{margin:var(--chakra-space-3);position:relative;width:1em;height:1em;} .css-cfkose{display:inline;width:1em;height:1em;} About Harvard .css-17xejub{-webkit-flex:1;-ms-flex:1;flex:1;justify-self:stretch;-webkit-align-self:stretch;-ms-flex-item-align:stretch;align-self:stretch;}

    One of the most prestigious universities in the world, Harvard University is the United States’ oldest college. Steeped in a rich 400 year history, Harvard's rich academic and research environment has fostered some of the world's brightest minds. Students at this Cambridge-based school have access to a world-class education and a community with exceptional talents, resources, and connections. Indeed, Harvard’s alumni includes presidents, billionaires, and award-winning researchers. Motivated students and passionate faculty members make it possible for Harvard's students to pursue their passions and gain the experience they need to realize their goals and make the world a better place.

    Unique traditions at Harvard

    1. Veritas Shield: This is a traditional shield awarded to incoming freshmen before their first academic year and bearing the Latin phrase "Veritas," which means "Truth." 2. Primus Cambridge: The oldest and longest-lasting student society of Harvard, founded in 1650 and based on the ancient Greek concept of peer-mentoring and motivation. 3. Senior Voices: One of the more recent traditions, this is an event at Harvard where senior members of the student body speak to emerging leaders of the university and offer advice, stories, and inspiring words. 4. Harvard-Yale Regatta: This is an annual rowing race between Harvard and Yale that has been taking place since 1852. It’s the oldest inter-university sports competition in the United States. 5. Immersion Experience: Started in 2002, first-year Harvard students are grouped together and given a social action project to complete, such as building a playground, teaching literacy classes to local children, etc.

    Programs at Harvard

    1. Investment Analysis Group: An undergraduate student-run organization that provides investment research on publicly traded companies and offers members the opportunity to cultivate their knowledge of finance and capital markets. 2. Harvard Foundations of Humanitarian Operations and Practice (FHOoP) Program: A partnership between Harvard and six other institutions that provides integrated instruction and experiential learning for students in the fields of humanitarian relief and international development. 3. Harvard Latino Law Review: A student-run online publication featuring articles, essays, and reviews from students and practicing professionals from both the academic and legal field on Latino issues and legal developments. 4. Harvard Model United Nations: An annual international relations simulation for university students to gain a better understanding of the global political landscape. 5. Harvard Robotics Club: A student-run organization that provides resources and mentorship to students interested in designing, building, and programming robots and robotic systems.

    At a glance…

    Acceptance Rate

    Average Cost

    Average SAT

    Average ACT

    Cambridge, MA

    Real Essays from Harvard Admits

    .css-310tx6{display:-webkit-box;display:-webkit-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-webkit-align-items:center;-webkit-box-align:center;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;-webkit-box-pack:center;-ms-flex-pack:center;-webkit-justify-content:center;justify-content:center;text-align:center;gap:var(--chakra-space-4);} find an essay from your twin at harvard .css-1dkm51f{border-radius:var(--chakra-radii-full);border:1px solid black;} .css-1wp7s2d{margin:var(--chakra-space-3);position:relative;width:1em;height:1em;} .css-cfkose{display:inline;width:1em;height:1em;}.

    Someone with the same interests, stats, and background as you

    Featured Topics

    Featured series.

    A series of random questions answered by Harvard experts.

    Explore the Gazette

    Read the latest.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Time to send in Goldin

    Collage of book covers.

    Why would a busy professor take time to reread a book?

    harvard admission essays that worked

    An Olympics first

    How i wrote my harvard essay.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Photos by Stephanie Mitchell/Harvard Staff Photographer

    Manisha Aggarwal-Schifellite

    Harvard Staff Writer

    First-years recount the agony and the ecstasy

    Late nights. Discarded drafts. That one great idea. Most high school seniors would agree that the admissions essay is the hardest part of a college application. The Gazette asked first-year students to reflect on theirs — the writing, the inspiration, the hand-wringing — and the lessons learned.

    Share this article

    Louisville, Ky.

    I stayed up really late at first, when my inhibitions were down, so I could write without being self-critical and brainstorm ideas. I probably went through 20 ideas, narrowed them down to five, wrote drafts of five, and then picked one and edited and edited and edited until I finished. All of the days writing the essay were stressful. I wrote about the transition from independence to interdependence and my personal growth that was catalyzed by my parents’ divorce. I reflected on my early independence as a child and how that transitioned to me depending on other people, working together in teams, and leading people to accomplish important things in our community.

    Allison Tu.

    “I stayed up really late at first, when my inhibitions were down, so I could write without being self-critical and brainstorm ideas.”

    Nick Nocita

    Arlington Heights, Ill.

    I distinctly remember writing my Harvard essay at Thanksgiving on my phone. The inspiration just came in waves while I was spending time with my family. I talked about my grandmother, who passed around five or six years ago. She was someone who really influenced me in terms of seeing what one can do with a selfless attitude. She had only ever earned a high school education, and she didn’t have the opportunity to go beyond that. Seeing what someone can do with a high school education was amazing for me, to think about what I could do with the power of a prestigious college education. It was such an inspiration that I immediately wanted to start writing about her. My family was watching a football game, and I was pumping out this essay.

    Nick Nocita.

    “The inspiration just came in waves while I was spending time with my family.”

    Divya Amirtharaj

    Portland, Ore.

    There were a couple of weeks when I was sitting in front of my laptop and getting nothing. But once I figured out what I wanted to write, it was fast; in a day, I was done. In one of my essays, I wrote about growing up in a predominantly white area and a skin condition that I have called vitiligo. I wrote about how those things impacted my identity as an Indian woman. In another, I wrote about how I went from competitive swimming, to lifeguarding, to teaching lessons, to starting a program for free swim lessons for underprivileged kids in my area. It was interesting to go back at the end and see what I had written, summing up my entire life for 17 years.

    Divya Amirtharaj.

    “It was interesting to go back at the end and see what I had written, summing up my entire life for 17 years.”

    Sophie Clivio

    Kingston, Jamaica

    I did submit my essay with a typo! I wrote it on Google Drive and made a comment to myself and a reference to switching something around. It’s at the bottom of my essay, and I didn’t realize until yesterday. I also wrote the essay as kind of a spoken-word poem. How many people have done that? I did not want to do the whole paragraph thing. I wrote about the culture shock I experienced moving from Jamaica to Milton, Mass., to attend boarding school, in terms of race and identity, because I’m a mixed-race person. I was really happy with the essay. It was very emotional to write, and I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders when I finished it. The typo was disappointing, but it’s fine! I’m here!

    Sophie Clivio.

    “I wrote the essay as kind of a spoken-word poem.”

    Marcus Miller

    For my essay, I wrote about being an athlete and finding your way after athletics by applying yourself in school. In eighth grade, I broke my femur, and I wrote about overcoming that. Then in my senior year of high school I tore my UCLs in both hands playing football. [That experience] brought me back to the process of rehabbing through injury. My essay was about finding your identity afterward. I’m more of a math and numbers guy, and I probably went through three or four ideas before I found this one.

    Marcus Miller.

    “I’m more of a math and numbers guy, and I probably went through three or four ideas before I found this one.”

    Kylie Simms

    Travelers Rest, S.C.

    I wrote about living in Milan when I was younger and how it opened my eyes to other perspectives and taught me not to be so quick to judge other people. In middle and high schools, I lived back in my small town in the U.S. and missed those interactions that helped me grow, so I also wrote about wanting to attend Harvard because I wanted to experience those different perspectives again. I didn’t edit my essay a lot because I wanted it to sound authentic and like my voice. I didn’t want to go through and replace all the words with fancier words. I wanted to sound like a person.

    Kylie Simms

    “I wanted it to sound authentic and like my voice.”

    Alexander Park

    Belmont, Mass.

    I had just gotten out of the shower and thought, “Oh, I got this.” I remembered this anecdote of me sitting in the back of my grandfather’s car in Korea, and he was telling me about when Korea was a kingdom and about these kings from the Chosun dynasty. It was really interesting learning about this history that I wasn’t able to learn in America from somebody who was super-knowledgeable and cared a lot about it. I remember my sister was leaning on me, and we were driving on the highway. It was very calming and peaceful. So, I wrote about my love for history and my love for listening to stories. A lot of people say that you have to write down your entire life story in however many words you’re given, but you can highlight one really essential aspect of your identity. Telling a story about that is much more compelling than trying to fit everything in.

    Alexander Park.

    “Telling a story about that is much more compelling than trying to fit everything in.”

    Nayleth Lopez-Lopez

    When I started middle school, my mom went back to college. She emigrated from Venezuela and worked in her own convenience store for 17 years. When she started college, I took on the role of helping her edit her essays. In my essay, I wrote about asking for help and how she inspires me to ask for help, because she had the courage to ask her young daughter for help. It was so emotional to write. The first time I asked my mom to read it, I freaked out because she said she didn’t know if she liked it. She thought it was too much about her. But I think it all turned out OK.

    Nayleth Lopez-Lopez.

    “I wrote about … how [my mother] inspires me to ask for help, because she had the courage to ask her young daughter for help.”

    More like this

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Their favorite things

    You might like.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Nobel laureate lefty gets nod from Sox to throw out first pitch

    Collage of book covers.

    They wade through stacks each year. But here are some that draw them back.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    First-year fencer makes history as member of all-Harvard squad in Paris

    The way forward for Democrats — and the country

    Danielle Allen is more worried about identity politics and gaps in civic education than the power of delegates

    17 books to soak up this summer

    Harvard Library staff recommendations cover romance, fantasy, sci-fi, mystery, memoir, music, politics, history

    Beginning of end of HIV epidemic?

    Scientists cautiously optimistic about trial results of new preventative treatment, prospects for new phase in battle with deadly virus

    What are your chances of acceptance?

    Calculate for all schools, your chance of acceptance.

    Harvard University

    Your chancing factors

    Extracurriculars.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    How to Write the Harvard University Essays 2023-2024

    Harvard University, perhaps the most prestigious and well-known institution in the world, is the nation’s oldest higher learning establishment with a founding date of 1636. Boasting an impressive alumni network from Sheryl Sandberg to Al Gore, it’s no surprise that Harvard recruits some of the top talents in the world.

    It’s no wonder that students are often intimidated by Harvard’s extremely open-ended supplemental essays. However, CollegeVine is here to help and offer our guide on how to tackle Harvard’s supplemental essays. 

    Read this Harvard essay example to inspire your own writing.

    How to Write the Harvard University Supplemental Essays

    Prompt 1: Harvard has long recognized the importance of enrolling a diverse student body. How will the life experiences that shape who you are today enable you to contribute to Harvard? (200 words)

    Prompt 2: Briefly describe an intellectual experience that was important to you. (200 words)

    Prompt 3: Briefly describe any of your extracurricular activities, employment experience, travel, or family responsibilities that have shaped who you are. (200 words)

    Prompt 4: How do you hope to use your Harvard education in the future? (200 words)

    Prompt 5: Top 3 things your roommates might like to know about you. (200 words)

    Harvard has long recognized the importance of enrolling a diverse student body. How will the life experiences that shape who you are today enable you to contribute to Harvard? (200 words)

    Brainstorming Your Topic

    This prompt is a great example of the classic diversity supplemental essay . That means that, as you prepare to write your response, the first thing you need to do is focus in on some aspect of your identity, upbringing, or personality that makes you different from other people.

    As you start brainstorming, do remember that the way colleges factor race into their admissions processes will be different this year, after the Supreme Court struck down affirmative action in June. Colleges can still consider race on an individual level, however, so if you would like to write your response about how your racial identity has impacted you, you are welcome to do so.

    If race doesn’t seem like the right topic for you, however, keep in mind that there are many other things that can make us different, not just race, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, and the other aspects of our identities that people normally think of when they hear the word “diversity.” That’s not to say that you can’t write about those things, of course. But don’t worry if you don’t feel like those things have played a significant role in shaping your worldview. Here are some examples of other topics that could support a strong essay:

    • Moving to several different cities because of your parents’ jobs
    • An usual hobby, like playing the accordion or making your own jewelry
    • Knowing a lot about a niche topic, like Scottish castles

    The only questions you really need to ask yourself when picking a topic are “Does this thing set me apart from other people?” and “Will knowing this thing about me give someone a better sense of who I am overall?” As long as you can answer “yes” to both of those questions, you’ve found your topic!

    Tips for Writing Your Essay

    Once you’ve selected a topic, the question becomes how you’re going to write about that topic in a way that helps Harvard admissions officers better understand how you’re going to contribute to their campus community. To do that, you want to connect your topic to some broader feature of your personality, or to a meaningful lesson you learned, that speaks to your potential as a Harvard student.

    For example, perhaps your interest in Scottish castles has given you an appreciation for the strength of the human spirit, as the Scots were able to persevere and build these structures even in incredibly remote, cold parts of the country. Alternatively, maybe being half Puerto Rican, but not speaking Spanish, has taught you about the power of family, as you have strong relationships even with relatives you can’t communicate with verbally. 

    Remember that, like with any college essay, you want to rely on specific anecdotes and experiences to illustrate the points you’re making. To understand why, compare the following two excerpts from hypothetical essays.

    Example 1: “Even though I can’t speak Spanish, and some of my relatives can’t speak English, whenever I visit my family in Puerto Rico I know it’s a place where I belong. The island is beautiful, and I especially love going to the annual party at my uncle’s house.”

    Example 2: “The smell of the ‘lechón,’ or suckling pig greets me as soon as I enter my uncle’s home, even before everyone rushes in from the porch to welcome me in rapid-fire Spanish. At best, I understand one in every ten words, but my aunt’s hot pink glasses, the Caribbean Sea visible through the living room window, and of course, the smell of roasting pork, tell me, wordlessly yet undeniably, that I’m home.”

    Think about how much better we understand this student after Example 2. If a few words were swapped out, Example 1 could’ve been written by anyone, whereas Example 2 paints us a clear picture of how this student’s Puerto Rican heritage has tangibly impacted their life.

    Mistakes to Avoid

    The biggest challenge with this particular “Diversity” essay is the word count. Because you only have 200 words to work with, you don’t have space to include more than one broader takeaway you’ve learned from this aspect of your identity. 

    Of course, people are complicated, and you’ve likely learned many things from being Puerto Rican, or from being interested in Scottish castles. But for the sake of cohesion, focus on just one lesson. Otherwise your essay may end up feeling like a bullet-point list of Hallmark card messages, rather than a thoughtful, personal, reflective piece of writing.

    The other thing you want to avoid is writing an essay that’s just about your topic. Particularly since you’re going to be writing about an aspect of your identity that’s important to you, you’ll likely have a lot to say just about that. If you aren’t careful, you may burn through all 200 words without getting to the broader significance of what this piece of your personality says about who you are as a whole. 

    That component, however, is really the key to a strong response. Harvard receives over 40,000 applications a year, which means that, whether you write about being Puerto Rican or Scottish castles, it’s likely someone else is writing about something similar. 

    That doesn’t mean you need to agonize over picking something absolutely nobody else is writing about, as that’s practically impossible. All it means is that you need to be clear about how this aspect of your identity has shaped you as a whole, as that is how your essay will stand out from others with similar topics.

    Briefly describe an intellectual experience that was important to you. (200 words)

    Harvard admissions officers are being considerate here, as they’re telling you explicitly what they would like you to write about. Of course, there are still nuances to the prompt, but in terms of brainstorming, just ask yourself: What is an intellectual experience that’s been important to me?

    Keep in mind that “intellectual” doesn’t necessarily mean “academic.” You absolutely can write a great response about a paper, project, or some other experience you had through school. But you could also write about attending a performance by the Berlin Philharmonic, or about a book you read for fun that made a big impact on you. So long as the experience was intellectually stimulating, you can write a strong essay about it.

    Once you’ve picked an experience, the key is to describe it in a way that shows Harvard admissions officers how this experience has prepared you to contribute to their classrooms, and campus community as a whole. In other words, don’t just tell them what you did, but also what you learned and why that matters for understanding what kind of college student you’ll be.

    For example, say you choose to write about a debate project you did in your American history class, where you had to prepare for both sides and only learned which one you would actually be defending on the day of the debate. You could describe how, although you came into the project with pre-existing opinions about the topic, the preparation process taught you that, if you’re thoughtful and open-minded, you can usually find merit and logic even in the polar opposite position from your own.

    Alternatively, you could write about a book you read that had been translated from Danish, and how reading it got you interested in learning more about how to translate a text as faithfully as possible. After watching many interviews with translators and reading a book about translation, you have learned that sometimes, the most literal translation doesn’t capture the spirit from the original language, which to you is proof that, in any piece of writing, the human element is at least as important as the words on the page.

    Notice that both of these examples include broader reflections that zoom out from the particular experiences, to show what you took away from them: increased open-mindedness to different perspectives, for the first, and a more nuanced understanding of what makes art, art, in the case of the second. 

    A strong response must include this kind of big-picture takeaway, as it shows readers two things. First, that you can reflect thoughtfully on your experiences and learn from them. And second, it shows them a skill or perspective you’d be bringing with you to Harvard, which gives them a better sense of how you’d fit into their campus community.

    The only real thing you need to watch out for is accidentally selecting an experience that, for whatever reason, doesn’t allow you to incorporate the kind of bigger-picture takeaway described above. Maybe the experience just happened, so you’re still in the process of learning from it. Or maybe the lessons you learned are too nuanced to describe in 200 words. 

    Whatever this reason, if you find yourself unable to articulate the broader significance of this experience, head back to the drawing board, to select one that works better for this prompt. What you don’t want to do is try to force in a takeaway that doesn’t really fit, as that will make your essay feel generic or disjointed, since the “moral of the story” won’t clearly connect to the story itself.

    Briefly describe any of your extracurricular activities, employment experience, travel, or family responsibilities that have shaped who you are. (200 words)

    This is a textbook example of the “Extracurricular” essay . As such, what you need to do is well-defined, although it’s easier said than done: select an extracurricular activity that has, as Harvard says, “shaped who you are,” and make sure you’re able to articulate how it’s been formative for you.

    As you brainstorm which extracurricular you want to write about, note that the language of the prompt is pretty open-ended. You write about “any” activity, not just one you have a lot of accolades in, and you don’t even have to write about an activity—you can also write about a travel experience, or family responsibility. 

    If the thing that immediately jumps to mind is a club, sport, volunteer experience, or other “traditional” extracurricular, that’s great! Run with that. But if you’re thinking and nothing in that vein seems quite right, or, alternatively, you’re feeling bold and want to take a creative approach, don’t be afraid to get outside the box. Here are some examples of other topics you could write a strong essay about:

    • A more hobby-like extracurricular, like crocheting potholders and selling them on Etsy
    • Driving the Pacific Coast Highway on your own
    • Caring for your family’s two large, colorful macaws

    These more creative topics can do a lot to showcase a different side of you, as college applications have, by their nature, a pretty restricted scope, and telling admissions officers about something that would never appear on your resume or transcript can teach them a lot about who you are. That being said, the most important thing is that the topic you pick has genuinely been formative for you. Whether it’s a conventional topic or not, as long as that personal connection is there, you’ll be able to write a strong essay about it.

    The key to writing a strong response is focusing less on the activity itself, and more on what you’ve learned from your involvement in it. If you’re writing about a more conventional topic, remember that admissions officers already have your activities list. You don’t need to say “For the last five years, I’ve been involved in x,” because they already know that, and when you only have 200 words, wasting even 10 of them means you’ve wasted 5% of your space.

    If you’re writing about something that doesn’t already show up elsewhere in your application, you want to provide enough details for your reader to understand what you did, but not more than that. For example, if you’re writing about your road trip, you don’t need to list every city you  stopped in. Instead, just mention one or two that were particularly memorable.

    Rather than focusing on the facts and figures of what you did, focus on what you learned from your experience. Admissions officers want to know why your involvement in this thing matters to who you’ll be in college. So, think about one or two bigger picture things you learned from it, and center your response around those things.

    For example, maybe your Etsy shop taught you how easy it is to bring some positivity into someone else’s life, as crocheting is something you would do anyways, and the shop just allows you to share your creations with other people. Showcasing this uplifting, altruistic side of yourself will help admissions officers better envision what kind of Harvard student you’d be.

    As always, you want to use specific examples to support your points, at least as much as you can in 200 words. Because you’re dealing with a low word count, you probably won’t have space to flex your creative writing muscles with vivid, immersive descriptions. 

    You can still incorporate anecdotes in a more economical way, however. For example, you could say “Every morning, our scarlet macaw ruffles her feathers and greets me with a prehistoric chirp.” You’re not going into detail about what her feathers look like, or where this scene is happening, but it’s still much more engaging than something like “My bird always says hello to me in her own way.”

    The most common pitfall with an “Extracurricular” essay is describing your topic the way you would on your resume. Don’t worry about showing off some “marketable skill” you think admissions officers want to see, and instead highlight whatever it is you actually took away from this experience, whether it’s a skill, a realization, or a personality trait. The best college essays are genuine, as admissions officers feel that honesty, and know they’re truly getting to know the applicant as they are, rather than some polished-up version.

    Additionally, keep in mind that, like with anything in your application, you want admissions officers to learn something new about you when reading this essay. So, if you’ve already written your common app essay about volunteering at your local animal shelter, you shouldn’t also write this essay about that experience. Your space in your application is already extremely limited, so don’t voluntarily limit yourself even further by repeating yourself when you’re given an opportunity to say something new.

    How do you hope to use your Harvard education in the future? (200 words)

    Although the packaging is a little different, this prompt has similarities to the classic “Why This College?” prompt . That means there are two main things you want to do while brainstorming. 

    First, identify one or two goals you have for the future—with just 200 words, you won’t have space to elaborate on any more than that. Ideally, these should be relatively concrete. You don’t have to have your whole life mapped out, but you do need to be a lot more specific than “Make a difference in the world.” A more zoomed-in version of that goal would be something like “Contribute to conservation efforts to help save endangered species,” which would work.

    Second, hop onto Harvard’s website and do some research on opportunities the school offers that would help you reach your goals. Again, make sure these are specific enough. Rather than a particular major, which is likely offered at plenty of other schools around the country, identify specific courses within that major you would like to take, or a professor in the department you would like to do research with. For example, the student interested in conservation might mention the course “Conservation Biology” at Harvard.

    You could also write about a club, or a study abroad program, or really anything that’s unique to Harvard, so long as you’re able to draw a clear connection between the opportunity and your goal. Just make sure that, like with your goals, you don’t get overeager. Since your space is quite limited, you should choose two, or maximum three, opportunities to focus on. Any more than that and your essay will start to feel rushed and bullet point-y.

    If you do your brainstorming well, the actual writing process should be pretty straightforward: explain your goals, and how the Harvard-specific opportunities you’ve selected will help you reach them. 

    One thing you do want to keep in mind is that your goals should feel personal to you, and the best way to accomplish that is by providing some background context on why you have them. This doesn’t have to be extensive, as, again, your space is limited. But compare the following two examples, written about the hypothetical goal of helping conservation efforts from above, to get an idea of what we’re talking about:

    Example 1: “As long as I can remember, I’ve loved all kinds of animals, and have been heartbroken by the fact that human destruction of natural resources could lead to certain species’ extinction.”

    Example 2: “As a kid, I would sit in front of the aquarium’s walrus exhibit, admiring the animal’s girth and tusks, and dream about seeing one in the wild. Until my parents regretfully explained to me that, because of climate change, that was unlikely to ever happen.”

    The second example is obviously longer, but not egregiously so: 45 words versus 31. And the image we get of this student sitting and fawning over a walrus is worth that extra space, as we feel a stronger personal connection to them, which in turn makes us more vicariously invested in their own goal of environmental advocacy.

    As we’ve already described in the brainstorming section, the key to this essay is specificity. Admissions officers want you to paint them a picture of how Harvard fits into your broader life goals. As we noted earlier, that doesn’t mean you have to have everything figured out, but if you’re too vague about your goals, or how you see Harvard helping you reach them, admissions officers won’t see you as someone who’s prepared to contribute to their campus community.

    Along similar lines, avoid flattery. Gushy lines like “At Harvard, every day I’ll feel inspired by walking the same halls that countless Nobel laureates, politicians, and CEOs once traversed” won’t get you anywhere, because Harvard admissions officers already know their school is one of the most prestigious and famous universities in the world. What they don’t know is what you are going to bring to Harvard that nobody else has. So, that’s what you want to focus on, not vague, surface-level attributes of Harvard related to its standing in the world of higher education.

    Top 3 things your roommates might like to know about you. (200 words)

    Like Prompt 2, this prompt tells you exactly what you need to brainstorm: three things a roommate would like to know about you. However, also like Prompt 2, while this prompt is direct, it’s also incredibly open-ended. What really are the top three things you’d like a complete stranger to know about you before you live together for nine months?

    Questions this broad can be hard to answer, as you might not know where to start. Sometimes, you can help yourself out by asking yourself adjacent, but slightly more specific questions, like the following:

    • Do you have any interests that influence your regular routine? For example, do you always watch the Seahawks on Sunday, or are you going to be playing Taylor Swift’s discography on repeat while you study?
    • Look around your room—what items are most important to you? Do you keep your movie ticket stubs? Are you planning on taking your photos of your family cat with you to college?
    • Are there any activities you love and already know you’d want to do with your roommate, like weekly face masks or making Christmas cookies?

    Hopefully, these narrower questions, and the example responses we’ve included, help get your gears turning. Keep in mind that this prompt is a great opportunity to showcase sides of your personality that don’t come across in your grades, activities list, or even your personal statement. Don’t worry about seeming impressive—admissions officers don’t expect you to read Shakespeare every night for two hours. What they want is an honest, informative picture of what you’re like “behind the scenes,” because college is much more than just academics.

    Once you’ve selected three things to write about, the key to the actual essay is presenting them in a logical, cohesive, efficient way. That’s easier said than done, particularly if the three things you’ve picked are quite different from each other. 

    To ensure your essay feels like one, complete unit, rather than three smaller ones stuck together, strong transitions will be crucial. Note that “strong” doesn’t mean “lengthy.” Just a few words can go a long way towards helping your essay flow naturally. To see what we mean here, take the following two examples:

    Example 1: “Just so you know, every Sunday I will be watching the Seahawks, draped in my dad’s Steve Largent jersey. They can be a frustrating team, but I’ll do my best to keep it down in case you’re studying. I also like to do facemasks, though. You’re always welcome to any of the ones I have in my (pretty extensive) collection.”

    Example 2: “Just so you know, every Sunday I will be watching the Seahawks, draped in my dad’s Steve Largent jersey. But if football’s not your thing, don’t worry—once the game’s over, I’ll need to unwind anyways, because win or lose the Hawks always find a way to make things stressful. So always feel free to join me in picking out a face mask from my (pretty extensive) collection, and we can gear up for the week together.”

    The content in both examples is the same, but in the first one, the transition from football to facemasks is very abrupt. On the other hand, in the second example the simple line “But if football’s not your thing, don’t worry” keeps things flowing smoothly. 

    There’s no one right way to write a good transition, but as you’re polishing your essay a good way to see if you’re on the right track is by asking someone who hasn’t seen your essay before to read it over and tell you if there are any points that made them pause. If the answer is yes, your transitions probably still need more work.

    Finally, you probably noticed that the above examples are both written in a “Dear roomie” style, as if you’re actually speaking directly to your roommate. You don’t have to take this exact approach, but your tone should ideally be light and fun. Living alone for the first time, with other people your age, is one of the best parts of college! Plus, college applications are, by their nature, pretty dry affairs for the most part. Lightening things up in this essay will give your reader a breath of fresh air, which will help them feel more engaged in your application as a whole.

    Harvard is doing you a favor here by keeping the scope of the essay narrow—they ask for three things, not more. As we’ve noted many times with the other supplements, 200 words will be gone in a flash, so don’t try to cram in extra things. It’s not necessary to do that, because admissions officers have only asked for three, and trying to stuff more in will turn your essay into a list of bullet points, rather than an informative piece of writing about your personality.

    Finally, as we’ve hinted at a few times above, the other thing you want to avoid is using this essay as another opportunity to impress admissions officers with your intellect and accomplishments. Remember, they have your grades, and your activities list, and all your other essays. Plus, they can ask you whatever questions they want—if they wanted to know about the most difficult book you’ve ever read, they would. So, loosen up, let your hair down, and show them you know how to have fun too!

    Where to Get Your Harvard Essays Edited

    Do you want feedback on your Harvard essays? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

    If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools.  Find the right advisor for you  to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

    Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

    harvard admission essays that worked

    We’re fighting to restore access to 500,000+ books in court this week. Join us!

    Internet Archive Audio

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • This Just In
    • Grateful Dead
    • Old Time Radio
    • 78 RPMs and Cylinder Recordings
    • Audio Books & Poetry
    • Computers, Technology and Science
    • Music, Arts & Culture
    • News & Public Affairs
    • Spirituality & Religion
    • Radio News Archive

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • Flickr Commons
    • Occupy Wall Street Flickr
    • NASA Images
    • Solar System Collection
    • Ames Research Center

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • All Software
    • Old School Emulation
    • MS-DOS Games
    • Historical Software
    • Classic PC Games
    • Software Library
    • Kodi Archive and Support File
    • Vintage Software
    • CD-ROM Software
    • CD-ROM Software Library
    • Software Sites
    • Tucows Software Library
    • Shareware CD-ROMs
    • Software Capsules Compilation
    • CD-ROM Images
    • ZX Spectrum
    • DOOM Level CD

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • Smithsonian Libraries
    • FEDLINK (US)
    • Lincoln Collection
    • American Libraries
    • Canadian Libraries
    • Universal Library
    • Project Gutenberg
    • Children's Library
    • Biodiversity Heritage Library
    • Books by Language
    • Additional Collections

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • Prelinger Archives
    • Democracy Now!
    • Occupy Wall Street
    • TV NSA Clip Library
    • Animation & Cartoons
    • Arts & Music
    • Computers & Technology
    • Cultural & Academic Films
    • Ephemeral Films
    • Sports Videos
    • Videogame Videos
    • Youth Media

    Search the history of over 866 billion web pages on the Internet.

    Mobile Apps

    • Wayback Machine (iOS)
    • Wayback Machine (Android)

    Browser Extensions

    Archive-it subscription.

    • Explore the Collections
    • Build Collections

    Save Page Now

    Capture a web page as it appears now for use as a trusted citation in the future.

    Please enter a valid web address

    • Donate Donate icon An illustration of a heart shape

    50 successful Harvard application essays : with analysis by the staff of The Harvard crimson

    Bookreader item preview, share or embed this item, flag this item for.

    • Graphic Violence
    • Explicit Sexual Content
    • Hate Speech
    • Misinformation/Disinformation
    • Marketing/Phishing/Advertising
    • Misleading/Inaccurate/Missing Metadata

    [WorldCat (this item)]

    plus-circle Add Review comment Reviews

    6 Favorites

    Better World Books

    DOWNLOAD OPTIONS

    No suitable files to display here.

    IN COLLECTIONS

    Uploaded by Alethea Bowser on January 12, 2012

    SIMILAR ITEMS (based on metadata)

    Login to your account

    Remember Me

    Register for a Free Account

    Access sample lessons, a free LSAT PrepTest, and 100 question explanations today!

    Password (twice) * password strength indicator

    Analytics Identifier

    Six Law School Personal Statements That Got Into Harvard By David Busis Published Feb 10, 2021 Updated Feb 10, 2021

    The essays below, which were all part of successful applications to Harvard Law, rely on humble reckonings followed by reflections. Some reckonings are political: an applicant grapples with the 2008 financial crisis; another grapples with her political party’s embrace of populism. Others are personal: a student struggles to sprint up a hill; another struggles to speak clearly. The writers have different ideologies, different ambitions, and different levels of engagement with the law. Yet all of them come across as thoughtful, open to change, and ready to serve.

    Jump to a personal statement:

    Essay 1: Sea Turtles

    I stood over the dead loggerhead, blood crusting my surgical gloves and dark green streaks of bile from its punctured gallbladder drying on my khaki shorts. It was the fifth day of a five-week summer scholarship at the University of Chicago’s Marine Biological Laboratory (MBL), and as I shuffled downwind of the massive creature, the pungent scent of its decomposition wafted toward me in the hot summer breeze. Aggressive flies buzzed around my head, occasionally pausing to land on the wad of plastic we had extracted from the loggerhead’s stomach. The plastic had likely caused a blockage somewhere, and the sea turtle had died of malnutrition. When the necropsy was finished, we discarded the remains in a shallow hole under a thicket of trees, and with the last shovel of sand over its permanent resting place, its death became just another data point among myriad others. Would it make a difference in the long, arduous battle against environmental pollution? Probably not. But that dead loggerhead was something of a personal tipping point for me.

    I have always loved the clean, carefully objective nature of scientific research, but when I returned to the US from my native XXXX to study biology, I began to understand that because of this objectivity, scientific data rarely produces an emotional effect. It is difficult to initiate change based on such a passive approach. My ecology professor used to lament that it was not science that would determine the fate of the environment, but politics. The deeper I delved into research, the more I agreed with her. Almost every day, I came across pieces of published research that were incorrectly cited as evidence for exaggerated conclusions and used, for example, as a rebuttal against climate change. Reality meant nothing when pitted against a provocative narrative. It was rather disillusioning at first, but I was never one to favor passivity. In an effort to better understand the issues, I began to look into the policy side of biological conservation. The opportunity at the MBL came at this juncture in my academic journey, and it was there that I received my final push to the path of law.

    After weeks of sea turtle biology and policy debates at the MBL, we held a mock symposium on fishing and bycatch regulations. Participants were exclusively STEM majors, so before the debate even began, everyone in the room was already heavily in favor of reducing commercial fishing. I was assigned the role of the Chair of the New Bedford Division of Marine Fisheries, and my objective was clear: to represent the wishes of my constituents, and my constituents wanted more time out on the sea. However, that meant an increase in accidental bycatch, which could hurt endangered marine populations and fill up the bycatch quota for commercial fishermen before the season ended.

    There were hundreds of pages of research data on novel technological innovations for bycatch reduction that I had to wade through, but with the help of my group, I was able to piece together a net replacement plan that just barely satisfied my constituents, the scientists, and the industry reps. Although the issue of widespread net replacement incentives for the commercial fishermen remained, there was no doubt that I enjoyed the mental stimulus of tackling this hypothetical challenge. I was able to use my science background to aid in brokering a compromise that would reduce the amount of damage done to the environment without endangering the livelihood of the people involved in the industry.

    By the end of the symposium, I knew that I wanted to bridge the gap between presenting scientific data correctly and effecting change in the policy world. Although there are many ways for me to advocate for change, I believe that only legal and legislative enforcements will have a widespread and lasting effect on the heavy polluters of the world. I want to combine my legal education and a solid foundation in the biological sciences to tackle the ever-growing slew of environmental challenges facing us in the twenty-first century.

    The night the symposium ended, we patrolled the beach for nesting females. As I walked beneath the stars, I thought of that sea turtle and of the repeating migration of my own life, from my birthplace in XXXX to my childhood in the US, back to XXXX and now the US again. With the guidance of the Earth’s magnetic fields, sea turtles are able to accurately return to their birthplace no matter how far they deviate, but I like to imagine that they, like me, do need to occasionally chart another course to get there. Standing on a beach in Woods Hole, thousands of miles from home, I knew that I was on the right path and ready to embark on a career in law.

    Essay 2: Joining the Arsonists To Become a Fireman

    On the morning of the 2004 presidential election, my sixth-grade teacher told me to watch out for John Kerry voters in the hallways because our school was a polling station. I nodded and went to the water fountain, thinking to myself that my parents were voting for John Kerry, and that as far as I could tell, they posed no risk to students. It was a familiar juxtaposition—the ideas at my dinner table in conflict with the dogmas I encountered elsewhere in my conservative Missourian community. This dissonance fostered my curiosity about issues of policy and politics. I wanted to figure out why the adults in my life couldn’t seem to agree.

    Earlier in 2004, Barack Obama’s now famous DNC keynote had inspired me to turn my interests into actions. Even at age twelve, I was moved by his ideas and motivated to work in public service. When Obama ran for president four years later, I heeded his call to get involved. I gave money I had made mowing lawns to my parents to donate to his campaign and taped Obama-Biden yard signs to my old Corolla, which earned it an egging and a run-in with silly string in my high school parking lot.

    While I knew in high school that I wanted to involve myself in public service, I wasn’t sure what shape that involvement would take until signs of the financial crisis—deserted strip malls and foreclosed homes—cropped up in my hometown. I was amazed by the disaster and shaken by the toll it took on my community. As I saw it, the crisis wasn’t about Wall Street, but about people losing their jobs, homes, and savings. I didn’t understand what Lehman Brothers had to do with the fact that my neighbor’s appliance store had to lay off most of its employees.

    Intent on understanding what had happened, I started reading up, inhaling books about financial crises and articles on mortgage-backed securities and rating agencies. Along the way, I also developed an affinity for the policymakers fighting the crisis. I admired how time and again these unknown bureaucrats struggled to choose the best among bad options, served as Congressional piñatas on Capitol Hill, and went back across the street to face the next disaster. I decided that I too wanted to work in financial regulation. I thought then and believe today that if I can help protect consumers and mitigate the downturns that force people from their jobs and homes, I will have done something worthwhile.

    Strange though it may seem, this decision led me to join Barclays as an investment banking analyst after college. While in a sense I was “joining the arsonists to become a fireman,” as one skeptical friend put it, banking gave me immediate experience working with the firms and people who had played key roles in the response to the financial crisis years before. I was initially worried that I would discover financial rules and regulations to be impotent platitudes, without the power to change the financial system, but my experience taught me the opposite. New regulations catalyzed many of the transactions on which I worked, from bank capital raises to divestitures aimed at de-risking. Ironically, becoming a banker made me even more of an idealist about the power of policy.

    I envisioned spending years in the industry before moving to a government role, and I left banking for private equity investing with that track in mind. When I began making get-out-the-vote calls on behalf of the Clinton presidential campaign, however, I realized that I needed to change my plans. I cared more about contacting voters, about the result of the election, and about its policy implications than anything I did at work. Although I’m grateful for what I’ve learned in the private sector, I don’t want to spend more time on the sidelines of the policy debates and decisions that matter to me.

    That’s why I am pursuing a J.D. I want to help shape the policies that will make the financial system more resilient and equitable, and to do so effectively, I need to understand the foundation upon which the financial system is built: the law. The post-crisis regulatory landscape is already in need of recalibration; large banks still pose systemic risks, and regulation lags even further behind in the non-bank world. Advances in financial technology, from online lending platforms to blockchain technology, are raising new questions about everything from capital and liquidity to smart contracts and financial privacy. Policymakers need to confront these issues proactively and pursue legal and regulatory frameworks that foster public trust while encouraging innovation. A J.D. will give me the training I need to be involved in this process. I don’t claim to have a revolutionary theory of financial crisis, but I do hope to be a part of preventing the next one.

    Essay 3: Populism

    Growing up, I felt that I existed in two different worlds. At home, I was influenced by my large, conservative Arizonan family, who shaped my values and understanding of the world. During middle school, my family moved, and I enrolled in a small, left-leaning school with an intense focus on globalism and diversity. I enjoyed being surrounded by people who challenged my beliefs, and I prided myself on my ability to dwell comfortably in both spaces.

    In 2015, American political reality disrupted the happy balance between my two worlds. The Republican presidential primary, in a gust of populism, was proposing ideas that I didn’t recognize and wouldn’t condone, like a hardline immigration stance, opposition to free trade, and a tolerance for harassment. I resented this populist wave for hijacking the party, and the voters who created it. I didn’t understand them, and I didn’t think I could.

    Despite my skepticism, I decided to make an attempt. As the founder of the Bowdoin College Political Union, a program that promotes substantive, inclusive conversations about policy and politics among students, I brought speakers with diverse ideologies to campus and hosted small group discussions with members of the College Democrats, the College Republicans, and students somewhere in between. In the winter of my senior year, I helped organize a summit that brought together students with a broad spectrum of views from dozens of universities throughout the eastern United States.

    As a resident assistant during the 2016 presidential election, I held open-door discussions for individuals from across the political spectrum and around the globe. Facilitating these discussions felt like a natural extension of my role on campus, and I learned not only that having space for open dialogue can ease tensions, but also that the absence of that space does not erase political difference. Instead, it creates feelings of isolation and fosters ignorance.

    But it was the death of a family member in early 2016 that helped me understand another perspective, namely the populist views beginning to overwhelm the Republican Party. After the death of my mother’s cousin from cancer, I called my second cousins, all three of whom are around my age, to offer my condolences. I was surprised to learn that none of them had finished high school. Instead, they had worked to help pay for their mother’s treatment. While I had been worrying about which summer internships to apply for, they were worried about maintaining their family home. In the past, I’d thought that their views on economic policy and immigration came from a place of ignorance or spite. I realized over the course of our conversation that I had no idea what it was like to not have a high school degree and compete for employment in a rural area where wages are low. For the first time, I was engaging with people in the demographic that was generating the populist wave that was sweeping the country. This conversation led me to expand my studies in politics and to think beyond the left-right spectrum to consider class and urban-rural divides within my own party. Ultimately, reconnecting with my extended family informed my decision to write my senior thesis on populist movements and why economics drives them. It also changed the way I thought about politics and its effect on people like my second cousins.

    After my college graduation, I took a job with a political and opposition research firm called XYZ in Washington, because I felt that my understanding of 2016’s populism was still lacking. XYZ gave me the opportunity to work with people from different parts of the Republican Party: both establishment operatives and grassroots operations. This enabled me to work within the framework of Republican politics that resembles my own, while being exposed to the perspectives of people working to represent people like my second cousins. My time at XYZ helped me see the power of the populist movement, but also understand the limitations of its proposed solutions, like a resurgence of manufacturing. Now that I have interacted with populist groups, I see that ultimately, the valid frustrations of many working-class Americans need to be addressed by empathetic leadership and challenging but necessary evaluations of policy in the areas of economics, education, and culture.

    I want to apply my passion for political discourse in law school and in my career as a lawyer. My passion for engaging with others will serve me well in the classroom and in a career at the intersection of law and politics. I hope to continue to make connections between people of diverse backgrounds and viewpoints and to engage in meaningful, bipartisan discourse.

    Essay 4: Pop Warner

    One summer, when I was eight years old, I signed up to play Pop Warner Football for my hometown. After the calisthenics, scrimmages, and the rest of practice concluded in the midst of the sweltering early August sun, I would sprint thirty yards up a hill steep enough to go sledding down. I had to lose nine pounds in order to make weight for my junior pee-wee football team. I wanted nothing more than to be on the team, so it didn’t faze me that I was the only one running up and down the hill. A dirt path marked the grassy knoll from my countless trips up and down. I usually managed to hold back the tears just long enough until I got home. As an eight-year-old, this was the most difficult challenge I had ever been tasked with. But the next day, I would get down in a three-point stance and sprint up the hill under the red sky of the setting sun.

    When I finally made the team, I was elated; I had achieved a goal I often felt impossible in those moments of sweat and tears. The excitement was, nonetheless, short-lived. The other kids still called me “Corey the Cupcake,” a nickname I thought I’d left behind with the extra pounds. In every game of the season, my first playing football, I received my eight minimum plays and rode the bench the rest of the game. It was an unusually wet September, and I caught a cold a few times from standing there for two and a half hours in the nippy morning rain. I hated it, but I kept playing.

    I continued to play every fall through high school. My freshman year, during a varsity practice, I broke both the radius and ulna bones in my left arm and simultaneously dislocated my wrist, which required a plate and four screws to repair. To this day, I can’t help but flash back to that frigid November afternoon when I look at the five-inch scar on my left arm or when the breaking point is hit precisely. Sophomore year, I was introduced to a coach who frequently criticized me for “not being black enough,” or sometimes, contradictorily, for acting “too black.” I was even benched for my entire junior year for being unable to attend football camp over the summer.

    Why did I play football for eleven years? It might have been for the Friday nights in front of the school, as there was nothing more thrilling than making a crucial catch and hearing the whole town cheer. It might have been because I wanted to fit in with my athletic classmates. It might have been because I felt that I was improving after each catch, each hit, and each drill. But I believe, above all else, it was because I just don’t like to give up.

    My first job as a project assistant at a large law firm was somewhat similar to my experiences as a young football player; both required grit and determination to push through difficult circumstances. Late one evening, two days before Thanksgiving, my supervisor asked me to complete and organize the service of eighteen subpoenas for the following day. The partners and associates were so busy with internal politics—one of the head partners was leaving the firm—that no one was available to walk me through the process. I felt ridiculous when I Googled “How to fill out and serve a subpoena,” but it was important to me that I complete the project properly.

    I am appreciative of the challenges that I faced as a project assistant. If it weren’t for those experiences, it is unlikely that I would have been fortunate enough to be hired by the Delaware Office of the Attorney General, where I work today. My job here has confirmed that law is exactly what I want to do. I realized this through several opportunities to draft written discovery. I loved fashioning objections to each individual request in a given set. Developing legitimate grounds for disputing discovery on its merits and intent was inspiring to me. I can’t wait to do this more and on a larger scale as an attorney.

    The steadfastness that I obtained as a young athlete defines who I am. I couldn’t see it at the time, but every day on which I gave something my best effort, whether it was on the practice field or in my tiny office on the twenty-seventh floor, I became a little bit stronger, a little bit wiser. I am confident that my perseverance and dedication will facilitate my future success, both in law school and afterwards.

    Essay 5: Speech Therapy

    When I was very young, I was diagnosed with a severe phonological disorder that hindered my ability to verbalize the most basic sounds that make up words. It didn’t take my parents long to notice that as other children my age began speaking and communicating with each other, I remained quiet. When I did speak, my words were mostly incomprehensible and seemed to lack any repetition. I was taken to numerous speech therapists, many of whom believed that I would never be able to communicate effectively with others.

    From the age of three until I was in seventh grade, I went to speech therapy twice a week. I also regularly practiced my speech outside of therapy, eventually improving to such an extent that I thought I was done with therapy forever. This, however, was short-lived. By tenth grade, I realized my impediment was back and was once again severely limiting my ability to articulate words. That was also the year my family moved from Vancouver, Canada to Little Rock, Arkansas, which complicated matters for me.

    I knew that my speech was preventing me from making new friends and participating in classroom discussions, but I resisted going back into therapy. I thought that a renewal of speech therapy would be like accepting defeat. It was a part of my life that had long passed. With college approaching, though, I was desperate not to continue stuttering words and slurring sentences. I knew that I would have to become more confident about my speech to make friends and to be the student I wanted to be. During the summer before my freshman year, I reluctantly decided to reenter speech therapy.

    I see now that this decision was anything but an acceptance of defeat. In fact, refusing to reenter therapy would have been a defeat. With my new therapist, I made significant strides and the quality of my speech improved greatly. Using the confidence that I built in therapy that summer, I pushed myself to meet new people and join extracurricular organizations when I entered college. In particular, I applied to and was accepted into a competitive freshman service leadership organization called Forward.

    The other members of Forward were incredibly outgoing, and many of them had been highly involved in their high school communities—two things I was not. I made a concerted effort to learn from those who were different from me. I was an active participant in discussions during meetings, utilizing my unique background to provide a different perspective. My peers not only understood me, but also cared about what I had to say. I even began taking on leadership roles in the program, such as directing a community service project to help the elderly. My time in Forward made it clear to me that my speech disorder wouldn’t be what held me back in college; as long as I made the effort, I could succeed. The confidence I gained led me to continue to push past the boundaries I had set for myself in high school, and has guided the bold approach I have taken to new challenges in college.

    When I first finished therapy in seventh grade, I pretended that I had never had a speech disorder in the first place. Having recently finished therapy again, I can accept that my speech disorder has shaped the person I am today. In many ways, it has had a positive effect on me. My struggle to communicate, for example, has made me a better listener. My inability to ask questions has forced me to engage with problems on a deeper level, which has led me to develop a methodical approach to reasoning. I believe these skills will help me succeed in law school, and they are part of what motivates me to apply in the first place. Having struggled for so long to speak up for myself, I look forward to the day when I can speak up for others.

    Essay 6: Ting Hua

    “Ting hua!” I heard it when I scalded my fingers reaching above the kitchen counter to grab at a steaming slice of pork belly before it was served; I heard it when I hid little Twix bars underneath the bags of Chinese broccoli in the grocery store shopping cart; I heard it when I brought sticks back home to swing perilously close to the ceiling fan. Literally translated, “ting hua” means “hear my words.” Its true meaning, though, is closer to “listen to what I mean.” Although the phrase was nearly ubiquitous in my childhood, that distinction—between hearing and listening—did not become clear for me until much later in life.

    That childhood began in Shanghai, where I was born, and continued in Southern California, where we moved shortly after I turned four. Some things stayed the same in the US. We still ate my mom’s chive dumplings at the dinner table. On New Year’s, I could still look forward to a red envelope with a few dollars’ worth of pocket money. But other things changed. I stopped learning Chinese, and my parents never became proficient in English. Slowly, so slowly I almost didn’t realize, it became harder and harder for me to communicate with them.

    Because I didn’t feel like I could talk to them, I could never resist opening my mouth with others. I talked to good friends about Yu-Gi-Oh, to not-so-good friends about Pokemon, and to absolute strangers about PB&J, the Simpsons, and why golden retriever puppies were the best dogs ever. Even alone, I talked to my pet turtle Snorkel and tried out different war cries—you know, in case I woke up one morning as a mouse in Brian Jacques’s Redwall .

    The way I communicated with my parents didn’t change until I came back for Thanksgiving my freshman year of college. I was writing for the school newspaper—a weekly column on politics. I had written an article in support of gay marriage. My parents had asked me about it, and in the way I was wont to do, I answered briefly before moving on to talk about my friends and my floor and my classes.

    While I was brushing my teeth that night, my dad came into the restroom. He stood in the doorway and said, “Hey. I read the article you wrote about gay marriage… you should be careful saying things like that.”

    His words—you should be careful saying things like that— sounded to me like homophobia. I knew that in China, same-sex relationships were illegal, stigmatized, banned, so I thought I understood where my dad was coming from, even though I also thought it was bigotry. I was about to brush him off, to accept that we had different views, but when I looked up, I didn’t see the judgment I was expecting. In the way he stood slightly hunched in the doorway, in the way he touched his chin, in the way his eyebrows drew together, I saw love. So I swallowed down “don’t worry about it” and asked what he meant. He told me about a cousin of his, someone I would have called Uncle, who was expelled from his school and sent to the countryside for his political comments. In that moment, I realized that my dad wasn’t concerned about my politics—he was concerned about me. Had I not stopped to listen , rather than just to hear, I would not have understood that. I would not have known why he told me to be careful.

    Although I still enjoy talking to other people about PB&J sandwiches, I have learned to listen, to actively engage with my parents when we communicate. More importantly, whether I’m interviewing witnesses on the stand in mock trial, resolving disagreements between friends, or sitting in a chair while teachers and professors give me advice, I’ve made an effort to remember those words my mom has spoken since I was a toddler: “ting hua.”

    📌 Check out our full, free admissions course .

    All Categories

    • Admissions 193 Posts
    • Success Story 4 Posts
    • LSAT 228 Posts
    • Logical Reasoning 10 Posts
    • Logic Games 10 Posts
    • Reading Comprehension 4 Posts
    • Podcast 87 Posts
    • Uncategorized 35 Posts

    Join our newsletter

    Other posts.

    With July days now beginning with the digit “2,” orientation is just three to four weeks away for most law schools. This means that law school AdComms are balancing the […]

    Listen and subscribe:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Audible It’s obvious that US News rankings are a huge deal that law schools care about … but do they really? Joining us on this episode is Evan Didier, […]

    Now that law school admissions officers have returned from the Washington, D.C. Law Forum and are hopefully done refamiliarizing themselves with how to navigate their university’s travel reimbursement forms, they […]

    Leave a Reply Cancel

    You must be logged in to post a comment. You can get a free account here .

    No products in the cart.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Successful Common App Essays

    Common app essays →, harvard essays →, mit essays →, princeton essays →, stanford essays →, yale essays →, common app essay | katie.

    Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds…...

    Common App Essay: Wooden Pulpits and Iron Podiums

    #7:  Open-Ended Prompt Each time I dance I am becoming more of who I am. That is why I adore dance. It is one of…...

    Common App Essay: A meaningful background, identity, interest, or talent | Grace

    Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you,…...

    Common App Essay: Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure | Jessica

    The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure…....

    Common App Essay | Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth | Valerie

    Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 10:00 AM – Museum…...

    Common App Essay | A meaningful background, identity, interest, or talent | Joseph

    Report content, block member.

    Please confirm you want to block this member.

    You will no longer be able to:

    • See blocked member's posts
    • Mention this member in posts
    • Message this member
    • Add this member as a connection

    Please note: This action will also remove this member from your connections and send a report to the site admin. Please allow a few minutes for this process to complete.

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • Test Preparation
    • College & High School

    Sorry, there was a problem.

    Kindle app logo image

    Download the free Kindle app and start reading Kindle books instantly on your smartphone, tablet, or computer - no Kindle device required .

    Read instantly on your browser with Kindle for Web.

    Using your mobile phone camera - scan the code below and download the Kindle app.

    QR code to download the Kindle App

    Image Unavailable

    50 Successful Harvard Application Essays

    • To view this video download Flash Player

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Follow the author

    Staff of the Harvard Crimson

    50 Successful Harvard Application Essays Paperback – May 9, 2017

    Fifty all-new essays that got their authors into Harvard - with updated statistics, analysis, and complete student profiles - showing what worked, what didn’t, and how you can do it, too. With talented applicants coming from top high schools as well as the pressure to succeed from family and friends, it’s no wonder that writing college application essays is one of the most stressful tasks high schoolers face. To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays , edited by the staff of the Harvard Crimson , gives readers the most inspiring approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, the nation’s top-ranked college. From chronicling personal achievements to detailing unique talents, the topics covered in these essays open applicants up to new techniques to put their best foot forward. It teaches students how to: - Get started - Stand out - Structure the best possible essay - Avoid common pitfalls Each essay in this collection is from a Harvard student who made the cut, is accompanied by a student profile that includes SAT scores and grades, and is followed by a detailed analysis by the staff of the Harvard Crimson that shows readers how they can approach their own stories and ultimately write their own high-caliber essay. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays ’ all-new examples and straightforward advice make it the first stop for college applicants who are looking to craft essays that get them accepted to the school of their dreams.

    • Print length 224 pages
    • Language English
    • Publication date May 9, 2017
    • Dimensions 5.53 x 0.57 x 8.27 inches
    • ISBN-10 9781250127556
    • ISBN-13 978-1250127556
    • See all details

    Editorial Reviews

    About the author, product details.

    • ASIN ‏ : ‎ 1250127556
    • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Griffin; 5th edition (May 9, 2017)
    • Language ‏ : ‎ English
    • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 224 pages
    • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 9781250127556
    • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1250127556
    • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 4.1 ounces
    • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.53 x 0.57 x 8.27 inches
    • #7 in College Guides (Books)
    • #16 in College Entrance Test Guides (Books)

    Videos for this product

    Video Widget Card

    Click to play video

    Video Widget Video Title Section

    Customer Review: No good

    harvard admission essays that worked

    About the author

    Staff of the harvard crimson.

    Discover more of the author’s books, see similar authors, read author blogs and more

    Customer reviews

    • 5 star 4 star 3 star 2 star 1 star 5 star 74% 16% 4% 2% 3% 74%
    • 5 star 4 star 3 star 2 star 1 star 4 star 74% 16% 4% 2% 3% 16%
    • 5 star 4 star 3 star 2 star 1 star 3 star 74% 16% 4% 2% 3% 4%
    • 5 star 4 star 3 star 2 star 1 star 2 star 74% 16% 4% 2% 3% 2%
    • 5 star 4 star 3 star 2 star 1 star 1 star 74% 16% 4% 2% 3% 3%

    Customer Reviews, including Product Star Ratings help customers to learn more about the product and decide whether it is the right product for them.

    To calculate the overall star rating and percentage breakdown by star, we don’t use a simple average. Instead, our system considers things like how recent a review is and if the reviewer bought the item on Amazon. It also analyzed reviews to verify trustworthiness.

    • Sort reviews by Top reviews Most recent Top reviews

    Top reviews from the United States

    There was a problem filtering reviews right now. please try again later..

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Top reviews from other countries

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • About Amazon
    • Investor Relations
    • Amazon Devices
    • Amazon Science
    • Sell products on Amazon
    • Sell on Amazon Business
    • Sell apps on Amazon
    • Become an Affiliate
    • Advertise Your Products
    • Self-Publish with Us
    • Host an Amazon Hub
    • › See More Make Money with Us
    • Amazon Business Card
    • Shop with Points
    • Reload Your Balance
    • Amazon Currency Converter
    • Amazon and COVID-19
    • Your Account
    • Your Orders
    • Shipping Rates & Policies
    • Returns & Replacements
    • Manage Your Content and Devices
     
     
     
       
    • Conditions of Use
    • Privacy Notice
    • Consumer Health Data Privacy Disclosure
    • Your Ads Privacy Choices

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • Utility Menu

    University Logo

    GA4 tracking code

    Office of Undergraduate Research and Fellowships

    • All URAF Opportunities
    • CARAT (Opportunities Database)
    • URAF Application Instructions
    • URAF Calendar of Events and Deadlines

    Writing Application Essays and Personal Statements

    Some applications ask that you write an essay that draws on more personal reflections. These essays, sometimes called Personal Statements, are an opportunity to show the selection committee who you are as a person: your story, your values, your interests, and why you—and not your peer with a similar resume—are a perfect fit for this opportunity. These narrative essays allow you to really illustrate the person behind the resume, showcasing not only what you think but how you think.

    Before you start writing, it’s helpful to really consider the goals of your personal statement:

    • To learn more about you as a person: What would you like the selection committee to know about you that can't be covered by other application materials (e.g. resume, transcript, letters of recommendation)? What have been the important moments/influences throughout your journey that have led to where (and who!) you are?
    • To learn how you think about the unsolved problems in your field of study/interest: What experiences demonstrate how you've been taught to think and how you tackle challenges?
    • To assess whether you fit with the personal qualities sought by the selection committee:  How can you show that you are thoughtful and mature with a good sense of self; that you embody the character, qualities, and experience to be personally ready to thrive in this experience (graduate school and otherwise)? Whatever opportunity you are seeking—going to graduate school, spending the year abroad, conducting public service—is going to be challenging intellectually, emotionally, and financially. This is your opportunity to show that you have the energy and perseverance to succeed.

    In general, your job through your personal statement is to show, don’t tell the committee about your journey. If you choose to retell specific anecdotes from your life, focus on one or two relavant, formative experiences—academic, professional, extracurricular—that are emblematic of your development. The essay is where you should showcase the depth of your maturity, not the breadth—that's the resume's job!

    Determining the theme of an essay

    The personal statement is usually framed with an overarching theme. But how do you come up with a theme that is unique to you? Here are some questions to get you started:

    • Question your individuality:  What distinguishes you from your peers? What challenges have you overcome? What was one instance in your life where your values were called  into question?
    • Question your field of study:  What first interested you about your field of study? How has your interest in the field changed and developed? How has this discipline shaped you? What are you most passionate about relative to your field?
    • Question your non-academic experiences:  Why did you choose the internships, clubs, or activites you did? And what does that suggest about what you value?

    Once you have done some reflection, you may notice a theme emerging (justice? innovation? creativity?)—great! Be careful to think beyond your first idea, too, though. Sometimes, the third or fourth theme to come to your mind is the one that will be most compelling to center your essay around.

    Writing style

    Certainly, your personal statement can have moments of humor or irony that reflect your personality, but the goal is not to show off your creative writing skills or present you as a sparkling conversationalist (that can be part of your interview!). Here, the aim is to present yourself as an interesting person, with a unique background and perspective, and a great future colleague. You should still use good academic writing—although this is not a research paper nor a cover letter—but the tone can be a bit less formal.

    Communicating your values

    Our work is often linked to our own values, identities, and personal experiences, both positive and negative. However, there can be a vulnerability to sharing these things with strangers. Know that you don't have to write about your most intimate thoughts or experiences, if you don't want to. If you do feel that it’s important that a selection committee knows this about you, reflect on why you would like for them to know that, and then be sure that it has an organic place in your statement. Your passion will come through in how you speak about these topics and their importance in forming you as an individual and budding scholar. 

    • Getting Started
    • Application Components
    • Interviews and Offers
    • Building On Your Experiences
    • Applying FAQs

    Carey Business School blog

    • Request Info

    Jul 17, 2024

    Admissions tips: How to write a graduate admissions essay

    An admissions essay is a standard part of the admissions application. To help, we’ve curated our top tips on how to write a standout graduate admissions essay.

    person sitting on couch with laptop, Carey Business School logo on tv in background

    • Share via Email

    Everyone has a unique narrative, and we firmly believe that your qualifications go beyond what can be captured on your resume. But the question is, how will you distinguish yourself from the competition when applying to Johns Hopkins Carey Business School?

    text that says Johns Hopkins Carey Business School: Application Essays with a blue background

    What to consider when writing a graduate school application essay The essay portion of the application is your opportunity to broaden our admissions team’s understanding of your abilities beyond what they can see on your transcript and resume. Writing an essay is your chance to share your unique strengths, personal history, journey of growth, and any additional qualities that show you are a strong candidate.

    Preparing to write your essay Prior to starting your essay, read all prompts carefully. Take a moment to reflect on your reasons for pursuing a graduate business degree. It may be beneficial to have a pen and notepad at your disposal for this reflective exercise. Think about your personal journey and pinpoint pivotal moments in your growth and learning, then take note of how those moments have shaped you and your experiences, and how they could help guide you through your business school journey. Be sure to also use the correct formatting and avoid adding lists and bullet points to your essays.

    Outline your thoughts Once you have a solid understanding of how to convey your personal journey within the context of the essay prompts, the next step is to construct an outline. As you shape the direction and flow of your essay, always keep your audience in mind. Our admissions team reviews thousands of application essays, so it’s crucial to find a creative hook that will make your story stand out.

    Don’t overthink As you begin to write your first draft, allow your ideas to flow freely. Don’t fixate on grammar or finding the perfect words at this stage–simply capture your thoughts on paper. You can refine your essay in the second draft.

    Step away After finishing your first draft, set it aside for a day or two before returning to edit it. Revisiting your work with a fresh outlook allows for a new perspective. During this second review, tackle the details of grammar, punctuation, and vocabulary. You might find it helpful to read your essay in reverse order to catch any typos.

    Ask for feedback Once you feel your essay is in good shape, it’s highly recommended that you share your draft with an advisor, professor, trusted colleague, friend, or even your recommender. Gaining insights from a trustworthy source can enhance the quality of your essay and assist in identifying any typos or minor adjustments. While editing is an important step, it should not cut out your authentic voice and tone. When identifying a proofreader, make sure to find someone who knows your authentic voice and tone and can edit your paper while still preserving your natural voice and tone.

    Finalize and submit You’re almost done! Before finalizing your essay submission, do one last review. Run a spell check and read your essay out loud to yourself. This approach can help you pinpoint areas that might require clarification or fine-tuning. As you review your final draft, be sure that you thoroughly addressed the question on the application.

    Keep in mind that the essay portion of the application is your chance to set yourself apart Admissions team members want to hear your authentic voice, with a style that sounds natural and genuine. By sharing your authentic self, and your transformative experiences, passions, goals, and voice, you can leave a lasting impression.

    Best of luck with the rest of your application journey!

    Upcoming Carey application deadlines

    The Fall 2025 Full-time MBA application is now open. Applications for all other Fall 2025 programs will open this fall. Please visit our upcoming deadlines webpage to view all application, decision, and deposit deadlines.

    Full-time MBA Fall 2025: Early action application deadline

    September 11, 2024

    Part-time programs Spring 2025: Round 1 application deadline

    October 9, 2024

    Full-time MBA Fall 2025: Round 1 application deadline

    October 23, 2024

    • Home News Tribune
    • Courier News
    • Jersey Mayhem
    • NJ Politics
    • National Politics

    What to avoid in college application essays | College Connection

    harvard admission essays that worked

    An important part of the Common Application, which is accepted by more than 1,000 colleges, is the personal essay. Students are given six options as prompts, as well as a seventh option which is to share an essay on a topic of choice.  So, students can write about anything at all.

    The essay is an integral part of the application, as it is typically viewed by all the schools to which a student applies.  It is the one section where students have the opportunity to share what is unique about them and what qualities they will bring to their future college community.

    To make their essay stand out, students should avoid some common pitfalls.

    Do not cheat. That means students should not turn to ChatGPT or to another person  to write their essay. This should go without saying but, sadly, it does need to be said. College admissions officers know what the “voice” of a teenager sounds like, and that’s exactly what they’re looking for.

    More: Top colleges where 'B' students are accepted | College Connection

    Do not write about mental health issues. Although many young people, as well as those in every age group, deal with such issues, it is important not to share that information. Due to privacy laws, colleges are not able to contact parents if students struggle with depression, substance abuse, or any other troubling behavior. Therefore, students should not raise a red flag, or they will most likely find their applications in the “rejected” pile.

    Do not be redundant. One’s personal essay is not the place to itemize the extracurricular, volunteer, and work experiences that are all included in the Activities section of the Common App. If there is one activity that dominated a student’s high school experience and is particularly compelling, it can be the topic of the essay. But students must elaborate on how they were profoundly impacted by their engagement. 

    More: How where you live affects your college admissions chances | College Connection

    Do not recycle successful essays that were submitted by prior applicants. Often, students turn to the multitude of articles showcasing essays written by students who were admitted to Ivy League and other elite institutions. What worked for a prior student will not be effective for another as it’s not their story. It’s vital for students to share their genuine story using their authentic voice.   The key to writing a thoughtful, introspective essay is to start early, carefully consider the story you want to share, and then do so in your very own style.

    Susan Alaimo is the founder & director of Collegebound Review, offering PSAT/SAT ® preparation & private college advising by Ivy League educated instructors. Visit CollegeboundReview.com or call 908-369-5362 .

    HKS Insider: Bibi Lichauco MPP 2025

    Headshot of Bibi Lichauco with quote about the size of the HKS community and advice she'd give to prospective students

    Bibi Lichauco MPP 2025 is pursuing a Master in Public Policy to better promote migrant integration, well-being, and prosperity. Prior to attending HKS, she was a government consultant in Washington, D.C., where she worked on projects to strengthen health systems  in West Africa, develop nonprofit management and fundraising strategies in Colombia, and support DEI efforts. She holds a bachelor’s degree in international relations from Tufts University and is originally from the Greater Boston area with family roots in the Philippines.

    What inspired you to choose Harvard Kennedy School?

    Harvard Kennedy School is a hub for aspiring experts and practitioners driven to solve public problems. When researching master’s programs, I saw that the academic offerings at HKS would allow me to sharpen hard and soft skills, deepen my understanding of public policy’s many complex intersections, and gain the confidence to move policy forward. By choosing HKS, I knew I would engage with peers, faculty, staff, and guest speakers in every sector from local to international levels of leadership. I knew my HKS experience would equip me to pursue my own career interests.

    What are your favorite things about your experience at HKS?

    It is delightful to be a student again, and everything I love about HKS is because of the people here. The HKS community is small enough that you can bond with anyone in any program, yet large enough that you can learn from a wide range of people with different experiences and policy interests—climate change, education, foreign affairs, tech, health, housing, political participation, international development, and more. Additionally, it is wonderful to work with faculty who are incredibly thoughtful about their curriculum.

    In what ways do you engage with the Harvard Kennedy School community outside of the classroom?

    Members of the HKS community wake up each morning to the HKS Daily newsletter, which lists dozens of activities happening on campus. The newsletter offers a wide selection of opportunities to get involved on campus—I’ve chosen to attend study groups with former White House staff members, informal lunch chats on social inequality, Forum talks with former state leaders, and faculty research presentations. I have also participated in the Taubman Center’s Economic Development Seminar and Center for International Development seminars on strategy and diplomacy. These kinds of series have supplemented my classroom learning and allowed me to engage with field practitioners and learn from their real-life experiences. Finally, the Professional Interest Caucuses (PICs), HKS’s version of student-led clubs and extracurriculars, are particularly exciting. Through PICs, students organize social events, guest lectures and panels, day trips, and themed Quorum Calls. I have especially loved joining events organized by the Asian American and Pacific Islander Caucus, Human Rights PIC, and Disaster Resilience & Crisis Leadership PIC.

    What advice would you offer to prospective students considering Harvard Kennedy School?

    View the application as a meaningful opportunity to reflect on what drives you. Read and understand the essay questions. Give yourself plenty of time to really think about the threads of your story and relay it in your own way. Ask yourself: What do I know, how do I know, what do I want to find out, and how can HKS help me get there? No matter what happens in the admissions cycle, you will have made space to remind and, perhaps, recenter yourself around what truly matters to you. This process itself can be quite rewarding, in more ways than one. 

    Quick questions

    • Favorite class: DPI-385M/DPI-386M , the two-part Race & Racism sequence of the core curriculum with Professor Khalil Gibran Muhammad and Professor Zoe Marks
    • Favorite study spot: Smith Campus Center for casual study and Widener Library Reading Room when it’s crunch time
    • Favorite restaurant near campus: Lê’s Vietnamese Restaurant
    • One bucket list item you want to accomplish before graduating: Bike to Walden Pond!
    • Favorite guest speaker: Andrea Guerrero Garcia , Director of the Growald Climate Fund and former lead negotiator for Colombia on climate coalitions 

    headshot of Komala Anupindi

    HKS Insider: Komala Anupindi MPP 2025

    More From Forbes

    How to make college admissions a little less unequal.

    • Share to Facebook
    • Share to Twitter
    • Share to Linkedin

    Last week I visited my 77-year-old mother who lives in Tiny, Ontario, on the beautiful shore of Georgian Bay. She was excited to tell me about the successful anniversary party she helped organize for the local senior center where she takes line dancing lessons. In the years since she moved from Toronto to Tiny, the senior center has become increasingly central to her social life. All her close friends are members, participating in activities like yoga, quilting, euchre, and line dancing to keep minds and bodies sharp. Then she recounted how nearby Casino Rama was donating a portion of winnings to select charities, including the senior center, but in return required greeters at the door. So one day last month, she put on her senior center shirt and worked a greeting shift.

    I was a bit surprised that my mom – a retired community college professor – was working as a greeter at Casino Rama. But that wasn’t the most remarkable part. “You also have to see what I was taught to do with my name tag,” she said. She brought out the shirt, which read “Georgian Shores Swinging Seniors,” and showed me how she placed the magnetic name tag right over “Swinging.” “My friend worked a shift the week before and was propositioned by a man looking to swing,” she explained.

    Just a senior, not a swinging senior.

    Apparently before there was a center, there was a club. And at the time of its formation, swing dancing was all the rage, hence Georgian Shores Swinging Seniors. But as should be clear from the list of current activities, my mom’s senior center may be the least prurient organization from Wasaga Beach to Penetanguishene.

    It turns out that the senior center recently refreshed its web site. The member who took charge of the neglected site – www.georgianshoresswingingseniors.ca – reported that nearly all the hundreds of submitted inquiries were from individuals and couples seeking to swing. With this vital information, a special meeting of the board was called, and a name change to Georgian Shores Seniors Club passed with unanimous consent. Although the brand new site looks terrific, vestiges of swinging seniors remain in social media , Google Maps , and the swinging shirt my mom will continue to wear to Casino Rama.

    Marketing a line dancing and euchre club as swinging is one way to attract depraved interest. Another is to claim a secret path for gaining admission to elite colleges. That’s what admissions consultants like Crimson Education do, and not inadvertently. Crimson boasts that it helps “students gain admission to the Ivy League, Stanford, MIT, Duke, UC Berkeley, UCLA, and other top colleges at a rate that is 5x higher than the general applicant rate.” The firm posts a whirling counter showing 992 offers to Ivy League universities and 293 offers to Oxford and Cambridge, as well as a banner congratulating “Crimson’s Class of 2028, who have already received more than 289 acceptances to the Ivy League.” (More than 289? So 290? 291?) Lucky for Crimson that not even Harvard can trademark a color.

    Dana White Savagely Announces UFC’s Split With Undefeated Fighter

    Robert downey jr’s casting as doctor doom sparks backlash from fans, google says sorry after passwords vanish for 15 million windows users.

    Christopher Rim of admissions consultant Command Education generates client interest through a weekly Forbes column on subjects as varied and search-engine-optimized as 3 Things To Consider When Hiring An Ivy League College Consultant, Five Ways to Maximize Your Academic Summer Program For Ivy League Admissions, and The Personal Statement Topics Ivy League Hopefuls Should Avoid . This last column sagely counsels high schoolers to avoid writing cliché essays like the trauma dump, the pandemic sob story, and the travelogue. That’s common sense advice, although there may be some value to paying for it in a process where emotions reign and judgment can be as spotty as putting “swinging” into the name of a Canadian seniors club.

    Crimson and Command are just two of thousands of admissions consulting firms – some large and international, most sole proprietors – marketing prestige to parents with means and touting the ability to help students find what makes them unique, wrap it, and tie it up in a bow for Bowdoin. It’s an industry as American as they come: helping students climb the socioeconomic ladder for profit. One industry participant estimates that over 50% of applicants to highly selective schools hire consultants. And because parents who hire consultants are also keenly attuned to rankings, several clever marketers have put out rankings of admissions consultants , which could be a sign of the apocalypse.

    What do these firms do? Services seem to fall into four buckets:

    1) Guidance and planning: helping select high school courses, assembling lists of college targets (safety, target, reach, extreme reach), and tricks to signal real interest to get around colleges playing at yield protection

    2) Shaping: advising on – or matching to – extracurricular activities to “shape” applicant

    3) Standardized test tutoring

    4) Writing personal statement and essays

    Costs vary wildly. Some firms charge $5-10K for essays, others are $100K+ with meetings beginning in ninth grade. As I learned from a June issue of the New York Times Magazine , one of the latter is a former classmate of mind who seems to sit near the industry’s apex. Benjamin Bolger has attended all eight Ivy League schools, plus Stanford, Georgetown, Brandeis, Boston College, Skidmore, William and Mary, Ithaca, Michigan, Georgia, Oxford, Cambridge, and a few more. With 14 graduate degrees, Bolger is the most credentialed American under age 50. To fund his burgeoning collection, Bolger began working as adjunct faculty but had trouble making ends meet until – like Superman in the Fortress of Solitude or perhaps, given the amount of debt, like Batman watching his parents get killed – he grasped his true superpower: getting admitted to elite universities. And that’s the origin story of Dr. Benjamin Bolger Consulting. The self-titled “world’s leading expert in admissions,” and “world’s best education and admissions consultant” charges six figures and makes millions a year.

    Still, Bolger isn’t the very top of the market. That would be Ivy Coach , charging $1.5M for a five-year package, touting early acceptance rates north of 90% for Harvard, Stanford, and Penn, and maintaining that since all early applicants were admitted to Dartmouth for 14 years in a row “they don’t call us The Dartmouth Whisperer for nothing” (although I bet no one besides the founders and employees of Ivy Coach ever called them “the Dartmouth Whisperer”). Perhaps the only thing worse than colleges overcharging for 4+ years is college counselors overcharging for 4+ years, although given the socioeconomic status of Ivy Coach’s clients, it’s probably a victimless crime.

    Like a virus, admissions consulting appears to be mutating into new forms. Taking advantage of the lesson learned by Bolger concerning the compensation of young, well-credentialed academics, programs like Lumiere Education and Eureka connect college applicants with Ph.D students and junior faculty at elite universities “to undertake high-quality, personalized research projects.” And while Eureka posts a disclaimer not guaranteeing reference letters from faculty – “it is at the faculty’s discretion whether to provide student reference letters” – faculty (and families) understand that providing letters that can be submitted with college applications is a requirement for more work.

    Apparently the most elite consultants make students “apply,” which begs the question, is there a market for consultants to help students get accepted by the most elite consultants?

    Unlike the guy who approached my mom’s friend at Casino Rama, I don’t have any questions about swinging seniors. But I have two about admissions consultants. First, how effective are they? Second, how do we stop them?

    Companies like Crimson which compare admissions success to the “general applicant rate” expect families to overlook the fact that paying clients are quite different in terms of wealth and parenting (helicopter or snowplow). Self-selection may go a long way to explaining any admissions advantage. I also question whether application readers can’t see through much of the shaping and packaging effected by consultancies and research mills. It’s hard to mass-produce authenticity. As repeat players, admissions offices should be well versed in distinguishing between authentic passion and branding.

    But I’m more concerned about the human and social toll. Coaching a 14- or 15-year-old to identify what Ivy Coach calls “a singular hook” is stressful and likely developmentally detrimental, as is sending the message that figuring out who you are requires a service provider. As the “help” provided on essays (producing, per New York Times Magazine , “stories so compelling that they stand out from the many other compelling stories of the teenagers clamoring for admission”) includes idea generation, structuring, and line editing, students may infer it’s acceptable to pass off collaborative work product (or someone else’s work) as their own. And to the extent admissions consultants like Ivy Coach or Dr. Benjamin Bolger are effective, they’re fueling inequality.

    There’s no point blaming parents with Ivy League dreams for wanting to pay for help. But I don’t understand why colleges put up with it. Why don’t they require students to disclose whether they’ve paid an admissions consultant or any service provider to help with their applications? An honor code of sorts, with admission offers subject to rescission for misrepresentation. Disclosure could be broad, covering SAT and ACT tutoring. Or it could be limited to the personal statement. I’d imagine most admissions officers would find any disclosure of paid assistance valuable in assessing authenticity.

    One objection is that students attending well-resourced private and public schools already benefit from college counselors with caseloads as low as 30. At the typical high school, the ratio is closer to 1,000 : 1 , leaving little to no opportunity for meaningful counseling, let alone essay line edits. Another is that parents sending their children to wealthy schools tend to be better educated and are already active participants at all stages of the process.

    But while top colleges will never succeed in establishing a level playing field for admissions, in the spirit of not letting the best be the enemy of the good, demanding disclosure could make it less uneven. That and directing application fees to fund nonprofit college counseling organizations and making sure applicants are aware of such services. Both would help take some of the money out of applying to college and make the case to disillusioned Americans that college is part of the solution. Because unlike swinging, the problem of inequality in elite college admissions isn’t something that can be covered up with a name tag.

    Ryan Craig

    • Editorial Standards
    • Reprints & Permissions

    Join The Conversation

    One Community. Many Voices. Create a free account to share your thoughts. 

    Forbes Community Guidelines

    Our community is about connecting people through open and thoughtful conversations. We want our readers to share their views and exchange ideas and facts in a safe space.

    In order to do so, please follow the posting rules in our site's  Terms of Service.   We've summarized some of those key rules below. Simply put, keep it civil.

    Your post will be rejected if we notice that it seems to contain:

    • False or intentionally out-of-context or misleading information
    • Insults, profanity, incoherent, obscene or inflammatory language or threats of any kind
    • Attacks on the identity of other commenters or the article's author
    • Content that otherwise violates our site's  terms.

    User accounts will be blocked if we notice or believe that users are engaged in:

    • Continuous attempts to re-post comments that have been previously moderated/rejected
    • Racist, sexist, homophobic or other discriminatory comments
    • Attempts or tactics that put the site security at risk
    • Actions that otherwise violate our site's  terms.

    So, how can you be a power user?

    • Stay on topic and share your insights
    • Feel free to be clear and thoughtful to get your point across
    • ‘Like’ or ‘Dislike’ to show your point of view.
    • Protect your community.
    • Use the report tool to alert us when someone breaks the rules.

    Thanks for reading our community guidelines. Please read the full list of posting rules found in our site's  Terms of Service.

    FALL COURSE REGISTRATION  is open through August 29. Explore courses today.

    How to Get Started in Technology: A Career Guide

    Careers in technology are rapidly growing and are here to stay. This guide offers tips and steps you can take if you're ready to start your journey in this dynamic field.

    Jessica A. Kent

    It’s easy to underestimate the technology that surrounds us each day, improving business operations, facilitating communication, and helping to evolve industry and culture.

    But technology is truly everywhere; 72 percent of businesses have adopted artificial intelligence (AI), up from 55 percent in 2023. By 2028, more than 50 percent of enterprises will be in the cloud. According to IBM, a data breach costs a company an average of $4.45 million, making cybersecurity professionals more in demand than ever. There are more than 310 million smartphone users in the United States, according to Statista — all of whom use multiple applications.

    Because of its prevalence and impact, technology offers plenty of job opportunities as well. The U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics projects technology occupations to grow faster than the average by 2032. Today, the top in-demand tech jobs include systems security manager, network/cloud architect, and applications architect.

    Clearly, the outlook for tech careers is strong. But is technology a good career path for you?

    We consulted Heather Hinton , chief information security officer at PagerDuty who also teaches cybersecurity courses at Harvard Extension School, for her insights on how to get into tech. Whether you are considering a career pivot or are just starting out, this guide will help you assess your interest and create a plan.

    Is a Career in Technology Right For You?

    As with any career exploration, you should start by evaluating your career goals and interests and whether they align with a career in technology.

    Hinton suggests asking the following questions to guide your path forward through all the opportunities: 

    • How do I want to make a difference?
    • What kind of company do I want to work for?
    • How do I want to apply my skills in an organization?

    Maybe you want to learn AI so that you can help manufacturing companies become more efficient. Or maybe you want to learn web development or programming langauges so that you can help start-ups create a more engaging online presence.

    “Make sure you’ve got something that will make you stand out,” Hinton says. “It’s not just, ‘I use AI, therefore, you should hire me.’ It’s: ‘I have a background in AI or data science or cybersecurity or web development. These are the things I know you are suffering from or that you are struggling with. And here’s how I can help you.’”

    Think about your interests and personal attributes, too. Those most poised for successful careers in tech, according to Hinton, are excellent problem solvers, good communicators, and curious professionals committed to continual learning.

    Courses of Study and Education

    While technology is a very broad area in which to focus, there are a few in-demand categories where innovation is booming today:

    • Artificial intelligence (AI) uses machine learning to problem solve similar to human cognition, with broad applications across many industries.
    • Cybersecurity is the practice of protecting an organization’s networks and IT systems from attack.
    • Computer science and coding focuses on computer systems, hardware, networks, and software development.
    • Data science is the practice of applying statistical analysis to data to gain relevant insights from that data.
    • Digital media focuses on designing experiences for the web, video, games, or other digital mediums.

    Whether it’s a class, certificate program, or degree, education will help you build the skills to break into tech. Hinton suggests exploring options that align with your goals. 

    A useful approach is to find out what common technical skills are listed in your ideal job postings and build your focus from there. This way, you can start building out courses that align with the experience you need.

    Harvard Extension School offerings

    Master’s Degrees

    • Computer science
    • Cybersecurity
    • Data science
    • Digital media design
    • Systems engineering

    Graduate Certificates

    • Front end / back end web development
    • Data analytics
    • Learning design
    • Programming

    Microcertificates

    Database management

    Data modeling and ethics

    UX/UI design

    Web application development

    Gaining Experience in Tech

    In addition to your courses, start looking for opportunities for real-world connections and experience in the areas of tech you want to enter, both inside and outside your current workplace.

    Be prepared for continuous learning

    Technology rarely stays static, so be prepared for continued education to learn about emerging technologies and to keep your skills and knowledge current.

    By pursuing continuing education, you’re demonstrating that continuous learning mindset to future employers — which is especially key in tech roles.

    Find opportunities at your workplace

    If you’re currently employed, explore opportunities at your workplace, where you already know the systems and the organization is already dedicated to your success.

    Hinton suggests having conversations with the managers and senior leaders in a tech-focused department and seeking mentorship and coaching to build relationships. 

    “The hiring managers get to know you. The teams get to know you. You get to see what they’re doing,” she says. “Ask if you can attend a weekly staff meeting or status meeting so that you can learn what they’re doing. And then you slowly build up your reputation. As you learn all of this, you can actually start to contribute.”

    When it comes time to hire for a new role, you’ve already established yourself as a valuable candidate

    Networking and industry exposure

    Technology makes it easy to connect with others, and you can use this to your advantage as you begin networking. Follow tech professionals and leaders in your area of interest on LinkedIn or other social media platforms. Subscribe to informative blogs or newsletters. Attend industry webinars or conferences (in-person or virtually) to learn more from industry leaders.

    Find a mentor

    Whether a tech leader in your own company or someone you connect with on LinkedIn, a mentor can help you navigate your career journey. 

    Your support network can include anyone who is committed to helping you succeed, whether family and friends or a peer whose career you aspire to.

    Explore all Graduate Degree Programs

    How to Build Your Technology Experience and Portfolio

    Even if you’re still working full time in another area, you can prepare for your upcoming career change by gaining applicable experiences today.

    Taking a course with a capstone project will help you build your portfolio. In the Cybersecurity Master’s Degree Program at Harvard Extension School, Hinton guides students through building their own application and detailing in a paper the idea, budget, and market for the application, as well as the plan for developing and securing it. Such a project demonstrates that students can take a product through an entire lifecycle.

    You might get involved in open-source projects or volunteer — especially for nonprofits that may have smaller budgets to dedicate to industry professionals. 

    “It’s all about the quality and the relevance of what you’re doing, because what you’re showing is you’ve got that passion, you’ve got that interest, you’ve got the continual learning,” Hinton says.

    Additional certifications

    Depending on the area of technology you want to pursue, you may need a professional certification to stand out.

    For example, tech professionals pursuing a career in cybersecurity could earn credentials like the Certified Information Systems Security Professional (CISSP) certification. Those interested in database or systems management can obtain the CompTIA DataSys+ credential. Or you can become certified on specific platforms, like Amazon Web Services or Google Cloud .

    Job Seeking and Interviewing

    Once you have the experience and confidence to begin looking for a role in technology, start with your current workplace if you want to stay there. Department managers are often eager to hire internally, and while you may still be learning, already having an understanding of the business systems, processes, and vision can help make that transition easier.

    However, you may choose to look at outside tech companies or in a different industry. If you haven’t interviewed in a while, you may need to brush up on your interview skills as well.

    You may feel under-prepared for your interview because you don’t have a resume of tech-related experience. However, look for ways your past experience can translate into future experience. 

    You may have never managed a software development process before. But if you’ve managed an event, you can include that experience to demonstrate how you’d translate those skills to your new role.

    As with any job search, it may take some time to find the right role. The good thing is that you’ve already done the work to know that a career in technology is right for you, which will help move you forward.

    Next Steps in Tech

    Technology plays a key role in defining and developing the world around us. You can start your career journey by determining what technology you’re passionate about and in which industry or areas you want to make an impact. Network with others and if you’re currently employed, seek out tech leaders in your own organization.

    Begin your educational journey by finding a course, certificate, or graduate program today that best suits your goals and aspirations.

    Read more about careers in technology

    T echnology FAQ s

    Where do i start to pivot into technology.

    First, determine what you want to get out of a career in technology. Don’t just jump into a focus area because it’s a hot new trend. Instead, evaluate what excites you, and how you want to use that technology to help individuals, businesses, or industries solve problems. This will help you determine whether a job in tech is right for you and what education and experience you need to pursue to launch your new career.

    What areas of technology should I pursue?

    Look at areas of technology that interest you and where you can see using that technology to help others — like learning cybersecurity because you want to help nonprofits stay safe. Areas of focus include artificial intelligence, cybersecurity, computer science and coding, data science, and digital media.

    What is the current job market in tech?

    As technological innovation accelerates, jobs in tech will be widely in-demand. Organizations across industries are looking for tech professionals to lead innovation and application, including:

    • Machine learning engineers or prompt engineers who can help implement AI
    • Information security analysts on a cybersecurity team
    • Data scientists to make sense of and extract insights
    • Knowledgeable software developers and software engineers
    • Cloud computing experts

    How do I gain experience in a new area of study if I work in a different field?

    Start with courses and certifications that can help you move toward your new career goals. But don’t overlook the opportunities, connections, and resources within your current workplace. Have conversations with tech professionals across departments to share your interests. You may get to sit in on meetings, gain a mentor, and be top-of-mind when it comes to new hiring.

    What education do I need to pivot into a career in technology?

    The amount of education you need will depend on what area or position you want to move into. Some positions or workplaces may only require certifications while others may require a four-year degree. Look at ideal job listings to determine what level of education you’ll need, and get started on your Harvard Extension School journey today!

    About the Author

    Jessica A. Kent is a freelance writer based in Boston, Mass. and a Harvard Extension School alum. Her digital marketing content has been featured on Fast Company, Forbes, Nasdaq, and other industry websites; her essays and short stories have been featured in North American Review, Emerson Review, Writer’s Bone, and others.

    A Weekend Covering Washington

    Journalism student Juliet Molz attended the in-person experience Covering Washington as part of Harvard Extension School's master's degree program in journalism.

    Harvard Division of Continuing Education

    The Division of Continuing Education (DCE) at Harvard University is dedicated to bringing rigorous academics and innovative teaching capabilities to those seeking to improve their lives through education. We make Harvard education accessible to lifelong learners from high school to retirement.

    Harvard Division of Continuing Education Logo

    Yes, the Enrollment Management Industry Is Harming Higher Ed

    Financial aid leveraging leaves low-income students and their families with heavy debt loads, Stephen J. Burd writes.

    By  Stephen J. Burd

    You have / 5 articles left. Sign up for a free account or log in.

    The book cover for “Lifting the Veil on Enrollment Management: How a Powerful Industry is Limiting Social Mobility in American Higher Education,” edited by Stephen J. Burd.

    Harvard Education Press

    In an opinion essay they wrote for this publication recently, Robert Massa and Bill Conley gently took issue with my book Lifting the Veil on Enrollment Management: How a Powerful Industry Is Limiting Social Mobility in American Higher Education ( Harvard Education Press ), arguing that my critique of the institutional financial aid strategies that the enrollment management industry promotes “is somewhat overstated.” More cutting was the headline of their column: “Is Enrollment Management Really Ruining Higher Ed?”

    It is standard practice in Washington, D.C., public policy debates for supporters of the status quo to portray themselves as realists and reformers as naïve or conspiracy theorists. This approach echoes the infamous attack line that Ronald Reagan leveled at President Carter during the presidential debates of 1980: cocking his head toward Carter and chuckling, he said, “There you go again.”

    It is important to say up front that I truly like and admire Robert Massa (I don’t know Bill Conley). By all accounts, he was an exemplary enrollment manager at Dickinson College, where he was dedicated to making the college more racially diverse. As Massa and Conley write, they had the good fortune of working at selective private colleges that were committed to meeting their students’ full financial need. They write that in their experience at such institutions, financial aid leveraging —an enrollment management practice in which colleges determine the precise price points, or tuition discounts, needed to enroll different groups of students, without spending a dollar more than necessary— was “primarily aimed” at just a subset of students with low or no need, and was “typically not used to determine the amount of institutional grants awarded to individual students with need.”

    Unfortunately, their experiences aren’t typical. In fact, fewer than two dozen selective private colleges leverage their aid and meet 100 percent of their students’ financial need.

    In reality the vast majority of colleges that engage in student aid leveraging do not meet the full financial need of their students. And many, if not most, of these colleges leave low- and lower-middle-income students with substantial amounts of unmet need, requiring these individuals and their families to take on heavy debt loads to enroll.

    In an analysis I conducted for the book of institutional financial aid data at 575 selective private and public colleges and universities, I found that these institutions’ use of non-need-based aid skyrocketed from $2 billion annually in 2000 to more than $8 billion by 2020, after adjusting for inflation. Breaking these figures down by sector, I found the following:

    • The 307 selective private colleges examined increased the annual amount they spent on non-need-based aid to $4.9 billion, from about $1.4 billion.
    • The 268 selective public universities examined increased the yearly amount they spent on non-need-based aid to $3.3 billion, from $931 million.

    At the same time that these selective colleges accelerated their spending on non-need-based aid, they left low-income and other financially needy students with larger funding gaps. Between 2000 and 2020, the average amount of financial need these colleges covered of their freshman student aid recipients dropped substantially: from 90 to 85 percent at private colleges and from 74 percent to 65 percent at public universities. A deeper dive into the data revealed that over this time period:

    • Nearly two-thirds of the selective public universities examined decreased the amount of financial need they covered by an average of 18 percentage points.
    • Nearly three-fifths of the selective private colleges examined decreased the amount of financial need they covered by an average of 11 percentage points.

    Rather than pushing colleges to limit their use of financial aid leveraging to a subset of students, the country’s largest enrollment management firms are aggressively marketing financial aid leveraging (also called “optimization”) products that are designed to help colleges use all their aid strategically to pursue the students they most desire: the best applicants, who can help them rise up the rankings, and the wealthiest, who can help them increase their revenues.

    EAB, one of the giants of the enrollment management industry, boasts to colleges that its “Financial Aid Optimization program ensures that every dollar you commit to aid is used to further your enrollment and net tuition revenue goals.” Instead of using student aid to meet financial need, the main goal of financial aid leveraging is to boost the institution’s bottom line. But don’t take it from me. Here’s what Nathan Mueller, a leader of EAB’s financial aid optimization team, recently told Higher Ed Dive : “The concept is to award financial aid in a way that results in the maximum total amount of net tuition revenue for the institution.” What this means in practice is that institutional financial aid dollars that used to go to financially needy students are now being used to provide discounts to entice affluent ones to enroll.

    Joanne Bresilien learned that lesson the hard way, as the author Beth Zasloff writes in a chapter in my book. Raised by a single mother, who supported her two children on a monthly disability check, Joanne decided that she wanted to attend Ithaca College to pursue her goal of becoming a physical education teacher. While Ithaca provides generous discounts to affluent students, the college left Joanne, a low-income, first-generation student, with a substantial funding gap for her first year that could only be filled by having her mother take out a $14,000 federal Parent PLUS Loan.

    Editors’ Picks

    • Did Trump Get HBCUs ‘All Funded’?
    • In Massachusetts, a Push for Free Community College for All
    • Taylor & Francis AI Deal Sets ‘Worrying Precedent’ for Academic Publishing

    Joanne is not alone. For colleges that leverage a substantial portion of their aid, PLUS loans are easy credit they can offer low-income families who are left with large funding gaps. Unlike federal student loans, which have strict borrowing limits, parents can borrow PLUS loans up to a college’s full cost of attendance (minus the cost of any aid awarded), regardless of their income. To obtain the loans, parents need only pass a lax adverse credit-history check that does not assess whether the borrower will be able to repay the debt. And because colleges are not held accountable if borrowers do default on this debt, the institutions don’t have to worry about how hazardous these loans may be for students’ families. As a 2019 Urban Institute report stated, the PLUS loan program is “a no-strings-attached revenue source for colleges and universities, with the risk shared only by parents and the government,” which loses money if borrowers default.

    It would be one thing if selective colleges left students like Joanne with large funding gaps because of limited resources. Joanne believed that was the case at Ithaca until one who day when she ran into an affluent friend outside her dorm who complained about having to go to the financial aid office. “I don’t know why they’re giving me an extra $14,000, and I don’t need it,” her friend said. For Joanne, “hearing this number, the same amount as her gap, felt like a punch to the gut,” Zasloff writes.

    The fact that families like Joanne’s need to take on such an extraordinary risk to attend colleges that are showering wealthy students with more money than they know what to do with should raise alarms. Policy makers need to take a good, hard look at the financial aid leveraging products, strategies and algorithms that the giant enrollment firms are marketing to determine whether they are putting low-income and other financially needy students in harm’s way.

    Massa and Conley conclude their column by writing that “enrollment management provides an easy target to blame” and suggesting that little would change for low-income students “if enrollment management consulting firms and current practices were banned from college campuses tomorrow.” These longtime enrollment managers have a right to their opinion, but it seems premature to reach that conclusion until we have a much better idea of what these firms are selling.

    Stephen J. Burd is a senior writer and editor with the education policy program at New America. He is editor of Lifting the Veil on Enrollment Management: How a Powerful Industry Is Limiting Social Mobility in American Higher Education ( Harvard Education Press, 2024 ).

    A photograph of police in riot gear, with the words "state police" on their shields, approaching a group of people huddled together, holding on to one another, on a lawn at Indiana University at Bloomington.

    Indiana U Board Doubles Down on Protest Restrictions

    The Indiana University Board of Trustees has approved a divisive policy expanding restrictions enacted against a pro-

    Share This Article

    More from views.

    A stock photo of a university building next to a sign that reads "university," next to a tree in autumn with red leaves.

    Survivability Is Not Sustainability 

    The existential question of institutional survivability may mask more important questions about sustainability and mi

    A calendar with the 15th of the month circled in red pen. A red pen lies atop the calendar.

    Why Aren’t College Grads ‘Job-Ready’?

    An icon depicting centralization: the icon features a central circle, from which eight lines and circles radiate outward, akin to the hub and spokes of a wheel.

    A Shared Governance Conundrum

    The increasing importance of technology demands a shared governance model that combines robust centralized support wi

    • Become a Member
    • Sign up for Newsletters
    • Learning & Assessment
    • Diversity & Equity
    • Career Development
    • Labor & Unionization
    • Shared Governance
    • Academic Freedom
    • Books & Publishing
    • Financial Aid
    • Residential Life
    • Free Speech
    • Physical & Mental Health
    • Race & Ethnicity
    • Sex & Gender
    • Socioeconomics
    • Traditional-Age
    • Adult & Post-Traditional
    • Teaching & Learning
    • Artificial Intelligence
    • Digital Publishing
    • Data Analytics
    • Administrative Tech
    • Alternative Credentials
    • Financial Health
    • Cost-Cutting
    • Revenue Strategies
    • Academic Programs
    • Physical Campuses
    • Mergers & Collaboration
    • Fundraising
    • Research Universities
    • Regional Public Universities
    • Community Colleges
    • Private Nonprofit Colleges
    • Minority-Serving Institutions
    • Religious Colleges
    • Women's Colleges
    • Specialized Colleges
    • For-Profit Colleges
    • Executive Leadership
    • Trustees & Regents
    • State Oversight
    • Accreditation
    • Politics & Elections
    • Supreme Court
    • Student Aid Policy
    • Science & Research Policy
    • State Policy
    • Colleges & Localities
    • Employee Satisfaction
    • Remote & Flexible Work
    • Staff Issues
    • Study Abroad
    • International Students in U.S.
    • U.S. Colleges in the World
    • Intellectual Affairs
    • Seeking a Faculty Job
    • Advancing in the Faculty
    • Seeking an Administrative Job
    • Advancing as an Administrator
    • Beyond Transfer
    • Call to Action
    • Confessions of a Community College Dean
    • Higher Ed Gamma
    • Higher Ed Policy
    • Just Explain It to Me!
    • Just Visiting
    • Law, Policy—and IT?
    • Leadership & StratEDgy
    • Leadership in Higher Education
    • Learning Innovation
    • Online: Trending Now
    • Resident Scholar
    • University of Venus
    • Student Voice
    • Academic Life
    • Health & Wellness
    • The College Experience
    • Life After College
    • Academic Minute
    • Weekly Wisdom
    • Reports & Data
    • Quick Takes
    • Advertising & Marketing
    • Consulting Services
    • Data & Insights
    • Hiring & Jobs
    • Event Partnerships

    4 /5 Articles remaining this month.

    Sign up for a free account or log in.

    • Sign Up, It’s FREE
    • Shopping Cart

    Advanced Search

    • Browse Our Shelves
    • Best Sellers
    • Digital Audiobooks
    • Featured Titles
    • New This Week
    • Staff Recommended
    • Discount Dozen
    • Reading Lists
    • Upcoming Events
    • Ticketed Events
    • Science Book Talks
    • Past Events
    • Video Archive
    • Online Gift Codes
    • University Clothing
    • Goods & Gifts from Harvard Book Store
    • Hours & Directions
    • Newsletter Archive
    • Frequent Buyer Program
    • Signed First Edition Club
    • Signed New Voices in Fiction Club
    • Off-Site Book Sales
    • Corporate & Special Sales
    • Print on Demand

    Harvard Book Store

    Our Shelves
    • All Our Shelves
    • Academic New Arrivals
    • New Hardcover - Biography
    • New Hardcover - Fiction
    • New Hardcover - Nonfiction
    • New Titles - Paperback
    • African American Studies
    • Anthologies
    • Anthropology / Archaeology
    • Architecture
    • Asia & The Pacific
    • Astronomy / Geology
    • Boston / Cambridge / New England
    • Business & Management
    • Career Guides
    • Child Care / Childbirth / Adoption
    • Children's Board Books
    • Children's Picture Books
    • Children's Activity Books
    • Children's Beginning Readers
    • Children's Middle Grade
    • Children's Gift Books
    • Children's Nonfiction
    • Children's/Teen Graphic Novels
    • Teen Nonfiction
    • Young Adult
    • Classical Studies
    • Cognitive Science / Linguistics
    • College Guides
    • Cultural & Critical Theory
    • Education - Higher Ed
    • Environment / Sustainablity
    • European History
    • Exam Preps / Outlines
    • Games & Hobbies
    • Gender Studies / Gay & Lesbian
    • Gift / Seasonal Books
    • Globalization
    • Graphic Novels
    • Hardcover Classics
    • Health / Fitness / Med Ref
    • Islamic Studies
    • Large Print
    • Latin America / Caribbean
    • Law & Legal Issues
    • Literary Crit & Biography
    • Local Economy
    • Mathematics
    • Media Studies
    • Middle East
    • Myths / Tales / Legends
    • Native American
    • Paperback Favorites
    • Performing Arts / Acting
    • Personal Finance
    • Personal Growth
    • Photography
    • Physics / Chemistry
    • Poetry Criticism
    • Ref / English Lang Dict & Thes
    • Ref / Foreign Lang Dict / Phrase
    • Reference - General
    • Religion - Christianity
    • Religion - Comparative
    • Religion - Eastern
    • Romance & Erotica
    • Science Fiction
    • Short Introductions
    • Technology, Culture & Media
    • Theology / Religious Studies
    • Travel Atlases & Maps
    • Travel Lit / Adventure
    • Urban Studies
    • Wines And Spirits
    • Women's Studies
    • World History
    • Writing Style And Publishing
    Gift Cards

    Add to Cart

    50 Successful Harvard Application Essays: What Worked for Them Can Help You Get into the College of Your Choice

    With talented applicants coming from the top high schools as well as the pressure to succeed from family and friends, it’s no wonder that writing college application essays is one of the most stressful tasks high schoolers face. Add in how hard it is to get started or brag about accomplishments or order stories for maximum effect, and it’s a wonder that any ever get written. To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, edited by the staff of the Harvard Crimson, gives readers the most inspiring approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, the nation’s top ranked college. From chronicling personal achievements to detailing unique talents, the topics covered in these essays open applicants up to new techniques to put their best foot forward. It teaches students how to: - Get started - Stand out - Structure the best possible essay - Avoid common pitfalls Each essay in this collection is from a Harvard student who made the cut and is followed by analysis by the staff of The Harvard Crimson where strengths and weakness are detailed to show readers how they can approach their own stories and ultimately write their own high-caliber essay. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays’ all-new essays and straightforward advice make it the first stop for applicants who are looking to craft essays that get them accepted to the school of their dreams.

    There are no customer reviews for this item yet.

    Classic Totes

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Tote bags and pouches in a variety of styles, sizes, and designs , plus mugs, bookmarks, and more!

    Shipping & Pickup

    harvard admission essays that worked

    We ship anywhere in the U.S. and orders of $75+ ship free via media mail!

    Noteworthy Signed Books: Join the Club!

    harvard admission essays that worked

    Join our Signed First Edition Club (or give a gift subscription) for a signed book of great literary merit, delivered to you monthly.

    Harvard Book Store

    Harvard Square's Independent Bookstore

    © 2024 Harvard Book Store All rights reserved

    Contact Harvard Book Store 1256 Massachusetts Avenue Cambridge, MA 02138

    Tel (617) 661-1515 Toll Free (800) 542-READ Email [email protected]

    View our current hours »

    Join our bookselling team »

    We plan to remain closed to the public for two weeks, through Saturday, March 28 While our doors are closed, we plan to staff our phones, email, and harvard.com web order services from 10am to 6pm daily.

    Store Hours Monday - Saturday: 9am - 11pm Sunday: 10am - 10pm

    Holiday Hours 12/24: 9am - 7pm 12/25: closed 12/31: 9am - 9pm 1/1: 12pm - 11pm All other hours as usual.

    Map Find Harvard Book Store »

    Online Customer Service Shipping » Online Returns » Privacy Policy »

    Harvard University harvard.edu »

    Facebook

    • Clubs & Services

    harvard admission essays that worked

    I'm a corporate lawyer with a mid-6 figure salary. Enlisting in the Marines set me up for success.

    • Andrew Hanson, now a lawyer, overcame a troubled youth by joining the Marine Corps.
    • Hanson pursued education post-military, earning degrees from Stanford and Harvard.
    • He now practices law at Skadden and earns a salary in the mid-six figures range.

    Insider Today

    This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Andrew Hanson, a 35-year-old lawyer based in Virginia. The following has been edited for length and clarity.

    Growing up without a lot in the Chicago area, I tried to do all the right things to set myself up, like taking honors classes and playing football.

    I lost my way and started making bad decisions. At 17, I was kicked out of high school because I skipped class to work at my fast-food job and hang out with my friends.

    I was always interested in the Marines

    After getting kicked out of school, I enlisted in the Marine Corps .

    I got my GED and took 15 units of entry-level community college classes, like English 101 and US History. My recruiter said it would help me get the military paralegal job I was aiming for, but I didn't get it, so I went into infantry.

    I left for boot camp in August 2006, graduated in November, and started at the School of Infantry at Camp Pendleton, California, the next month.

    I was on active duty for 4 years

    My first deployment was to Iraq, and then I deployed aboard the USS New Orleans . The military taught me to push myself, be self-disciplined, manage people and teams, and work in a fast-paced environment.

    I met my wife in 2008 while stationed in California between deployments, and she became pregnant with our first child as I neared the end of my first enlistment in 2010. I started to feel less invincible and began to think about a new career. I didn't want to be away for months at a time and miss my child's early life.

    I left the military and began classes at a community college

    Tragically, our first daughter died during birth. My wife and I supported each other and decided to persevere.

    Related stories

    I was enrolled full-time in an associate of arts program in political science and government, taking four to five classes per semester.

    I began working the graveyard shift as a  security guard to make ends meet. I was on campus from 9:30 a.m. to about 3:30 p.m. each weekday. Then, I'd go to sleep and get up to work from midnight to 8 a.m., five days or more a week.

    I had a real interest in criminal justice

    Many of my academic interests pointed toward a career in law, so I began researching what I needed to do to become a lawyer.

    The military taught me to always push myself above and beyond the minimum requirements. I joined two honors societies and saw that we received letters from universities inviting us to apply.

    I applied to seven or eight universities to earn my bachelor's degree in political science and government

    I felt confident that my chances of being accepted by some public universities were promising, but I also applied to some big ones, like Stanford and Columbia.

    Stanford offered me a place and a full scholarship through needs-based aid due to my income. Saying yes to Stanford was a no-brainer. Our second daughter was born right before we moved to Stanford.

    I struggled to balance full time work and study

    My job transferred me, but the hours weren't sustainable, so I quit to focus on being a student. I took out student loans to cover my family's living expenses.

    The highlight of my time at Stanford was a program called Stanford in Washington , where I spent a term in DC, took small classes that engaged in government policy, and worked an internship with the Department of Justice. My family moved with me, and we lived in a faculty apartment.

    I enjoyed the Stanford experience so much that I began to think about what next, and all roads pointed to law school

    In my junior year, I started studying for and taking the LSAT, drafting multiple essays for different prompts, and getting feedback from trusted sources.

    Based on my application metrics, I was confident I could get into some schools, but I've also thrown a few Hail Marys in my life, and they've been caught, so I wanted to give some of the top-ranked schools a shot.

    One of the first schools that I heard back from was my No. 1 choice: Harvard University

    When the call came from an unknown number in Cambridge, Massachusetts, I couldn't believe this was happening to me.

    I saved three academic years of GI Bill benefits because of my scholarship to Stanford. The GI Bill is capped at the highest cost of an in-state public school, but they have a Yellow Ribbon Program where schools can agree to work with the Department of Veterans Affairs to cover some or all of the remaining gap.

    Fortunately, Harvard covered 50% of the remaining gap, so the VA matched and covered the rest.

    I essentially went to Harvard for free

    I took out more student loans to cover family living expenses, and our third child was born shortly after I arrived at Harvard.

    It was very similar to my Stanford experience, where there were many people with extremely impressive backgrounds. Then there were people like me who seemingly 'defied the odds' that we incorrectly believed made places like this out of our reach.

    The best advice I received during my academic career is that you're not paying for the materials in textbooks so much as the people you meet and the conversations you'll have.

    After graduating in 2017, I was offered a job at a top law firm

    I now practice securities enforcement at Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom , and my salary is in the mid-six figures range.

    Our fourth child was born shortly after we moved back to DC. After supporting me, my wife is pursuing her career interests with our local county police department.

    It's pretty amazing that a Black kid from a low-income family who didn't finish high school was able to achieve all of this. I've had no regrets since joining the Marines.

    I could've made better decisions as a teenager, but that's life. I don't know that I'd be in the same place or have achieved the same accomplishments had I not taken my current path.

    Want to share your story? Email Lauryn Haas at [email protected].

    harvard admission essays that worked

    • Main content

    IMAGES

    1. (PDF) [50 Successful Harvard Application Essays]

      harvard admission essays that worked

    2. College Essay Guides

      harvard admission essays that worked

    3. harvard essays that worked pdf

      harvard admission essays that worked

    4. Buy College Admissions Essay Example Harvard, 10 Successful Harvard

      harvard admission essays that worked

    5. Writing Admissions Essays

      harvard admission essays that worked

    6. Strong Admissions Essay Example

      harvard admission essays that worked

    VIDEO

    1. How to answer the Harvard application essays

    2. Harvard Admission: Leveraging Your Extracurricular Activities

    3. How do you get into Harvard Business School and Stanford Graduate School of Business?

    4. reading my uchicago essays + tips

    5. What Harvard *Actually* Wants

    6. How To Score Extra Points To Get Into Harvard

    COMMENTS

    1. 10 Successful Harvard Application Essays

      Successful Harvard Essay. I had never seen houses floating down a river. Minutes before there had not even been a river. An immense wall of water was destroying everything in its wake, picking up ...

    2. 10 Successful Harvard Application Essays

      Successful Harvard Essay. Fish Out of Water: idiom. a person who is in an unnatural environment; completely out of place. When I was ten, my dad told me we were moving to somewhere called "Eely ...

    3. Harvard University Essay Examples (And Why They Worked)

      For more help with your Harvard supplemental essays, check out our 2020-2021 Harvard University Essay Guide! For more guidance on personal essays and the college application process in general, sign up for a monthly plan to work with an admissions coach 1-on-1.

    4. My Successful Harvard Application (Complete Common App

      This was how my application worked. Just below I'll describe the activities in more detail, but first I want to reflect on this list. ... Having read books like 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, I was frightened. I didn't grow up as a refugee, wrenched from my war-torn home! I didn't have a sibling with a debilitating illness!

    5. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays: What Worked for Them Can Help

      To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays gives you the most inspiring approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, one of the nation's top ranked colleges.

    6. 10 Successful Harvard Application Essays

      10 Successful Harvard Application Essays | 2020 ... I had planned for myself if I simply disregarded the taunting aches and worked doggedly to catch up at school. ... As an admission essay ...

    7. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, 5th Edition

      Book Details. Fifty all-new essays that got their authors into Harvard - with updated statistics, analysis, and complete student profiles - showing what worked, what didn't, and how you can do it, too. With talented applicants coming from top high schools as well as the pressure to succeed from family and friends, it's no wonder that ...

    8. Top 13 Successful Harvard Essays

      Harvard University requires the Common Application, with its 250-650 word essay requirement, as well as their own short essay questions, included below. Harvard University Supplemental Essay Prompts Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences.

    9. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, 6th Edition: What Worked for

      To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays gives readers the most inspiring approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, the nation's top ranked college. From chronicling personal achievements to detailing unique talents, the topics covered in these ...

    10. Harvard Essays Examples

      Harvard essays that worked show the writer's core values and interests to Harvard admissions officers. 4. Harvard is competitive. This may seem obvious, but Harvard is one of the most competitive schools in the nation. Harvard essays that worked helped students get the attention of admissions; however, evaluations of applicants are holistic.

    11. 50 successful Harvard application essays : what worked for them can

      50 successful Harvard application essays : what worked for them can help you get into the college of your choice. Publication date 2017 Topics ... Openlibrary_work OL20058225W Page-progression lr Page_number_confidence 100 Page_number_module_version 1.0.5 Pages 230 Pdf_module_version ...

    12. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, Third Edition

      To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays showcases the exact approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, the nation's top-ranked college.

    13. 35 Harvard Essays That Worked

      35 Harvard Essays That Worked. Updated for the 2024-2025 admissions cycle. About Harvard. One of the most prestigious universities in the world, Harvard University is the United States' oldest college. Steeped in a rich 400 year history, Harvard's rich academic and research environment has fostered some of the world's brightest minds ...

    14. How to Get Into Harvard Undergrad: Strategies and Essays That Worked

      Part 4: 2023-2024 Harvard supplemental essays (examples included) (Note: While this section covers Harvard's admissions essays specifically, we encourage you to view additional successful college essay examples.). Acing the supplemental essays is a crucial part of your child's strategy to get into Harvard. In addition to the Common App Personal Statement, Harvard's essays, like other ...

    15. How they wrote (and rewrote) their Harvard admissions essays

      First-years recount the agony and the ecstasy. Late nights. Discarded drafts. That one great idea. Most high school seniors would agree that the admissions essay is the hardest part of a college application. The Gazette asked first-year students to reflect on theirs — the writing, the inspiration, the hand-wringing — and the lessons learned.

    16. How to Write the Harvard University Essays 2023-2024

      First, identify one or two goals you have for the future—with just 200 words, you won't have space to elaborate on any more than that. Ideally, these should be relatively concrete. You don't have to have your whole life mapped out, but you do need to be a lot more specific than "Make a difference in the world.".

    17. 50 successful Harvard application essays

      50 successful Harvard application essays : with analysis by the staff of The Harvard crimson by Harvard Crimson. Publication date 1999 Topics ... Openlibrary_work OL9210838W Page_number_confidence 78 Page_number_module_version 1.0.5 Pages 198 Pdf_module_version 0.0.20 ...

    18. Six Law School Personal Statements That Got Into Harvard

      The essays below, which were all part of successful applications to Harvard Law, rely on humble reckonings followed by reflections. Some reckonings are political: an applicant grapples with the 2008 financial crisis; another grapples with her political party's embrace of populism. Others are personal: a student struggles to sprint up a hill ...

    19. Top 41 Common Application Essays That Worked

      This page features all of the successful Common App essay examples available on Squired, accepted to dozens of schools including Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, and Yale. Common App Essays →. Harvard Essays →. MIT Essays →. Princeton Essays →.

    20. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays

      To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, edited by the staff of the Harvard Crimson, gives readers the most inspiring approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, the nation's top-ranked college.

    21. How to Write the Harvard Supplemental Essay

      How to Write Harvard Supplemental Essay #3. Briefly describe any of your extracurricular activities, employment experience, travel, or family responsibilities that have shaped who you are. (10-200 words) This is your classic 150-word extracurricular essay.

    22. Writing Application Essays and Personal Statements

      Some applications ask that you write an essay that draws on more personal reflections. These essays, sometimes called Personal Statements, are an opportunity to show the selection committee who you are as a person: your story, your values, your interests, and why you—and not your peer with a similar resume—are a perfect fit for this opportunity. These narrative essays allow you to really ...

    23. Admissions tips: How to write a graduate admissions essay

      An admissions essay is a standard part of the admissions application. To help, we've curated our top tips on how to write a standout graduate admissions essay. LinkedIn; ... Revisiting your work with a fresh outlook allows for a new perspective. During this second review, tackle the details of grammar, punctuation, and vocabulary. ...

    24. What to avoid in college application essays

      An important part of the Common Application, which is accepted by more than 1,000 colleges, is the personal essay. Students are given six options as prompts, as well as a seventh option which is ...

    25. HKS Insider: Bibi Lichauco MPP 2025

      Bibi Lichauco MPP 2025 is pursuing a Master in Public Policy to better promote migrant integration, well-being, and prosperity. Prior to attending HKS, she was a government consultant in Washington, D.C., where she worked on projects to strengthen health systems in West Africa, develop nonprofit management and fundraising strategies in Colombia, and support DEI efforts.

    26. How To Make College Admissions A Little Less Unequal

      As the "help" provided on essays (producing, per New York Times Magazine, "stories so compelling that they stand out from the many other compelling stories of the teenagers clamoring for ...

    27. How to Get Started in Technology: A Career Guide

      Jessica A. Kent is a freelance writer based in Boston, Mass. and a Harvard Extension School alum. Her digital marketing content has been featured on Fast Company, Forbes, Nasdaq, and other industry websites; her essays and short stories have been featured in North American Review, Emerson Review, Writer's Bone, and others.

    28. Enrollment management industry harms higher ed (opinion)

      In an opinion essay they wrote for this publication recently, Robert Massa and Bill Conley gently took issue with my book Lifting the Veil on Enrollment Management: How a Powerful Industry Is Limiting Social Mobility in American Higher Education (Harvard Education Press), arguing that my critique of the institutional financial aid strategies that the enrollment management industry promotes ...

    29. 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays: What Worked for Them Can Help

      To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, edited by the staff of the Harvard Crimson, gives readers the most inspiring approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, the nation's top ranked college.

    30. I essentially went to Harvard for free

      I got my GED and took 15 units of entry-level community college classes, like English 101 and US History. My recruiter said it would help me get the military paralegal job I was aiming for, but I ...