funny one liner movie reviews

50 of the funniest, most searing movie reviews ever written

• Movie reviewers have had some pretty scathing takes on films throughout the years. 
• One reviewer referred to a film as like "Grease: The Next Generation" acted out by the food-court staff at SeaWorld.
• Another riffed "Some movies leave a bad taste in the mouth. This one causes full-on halitosis."

For many viewers, a movie can simply exist as something to fill a void of upwards of 90 minutes. Film critics, who spend their lives scribbling notes in dark theaters, ask for a little more.

" I have a colleague who describes his job as 'covering the national dream beat,' because if you pay attention to the movies they will tell you what people desire and fear in their deepest secrets," the late Roger Ebert wrote in 1992 . "At least, the good ones will. That's why we go, hoping to be touched in those secret places. Movies are hardly ever about what they seem to be about. Look at a movie that a lot of people love, and you will find something profound, no matter how silly the film may seem."

Sometimes the best thing to come out of a movie is a blistering review. INSIDER rounded up 50 of the funniest, most searing movie reviews ever written.

Critics said that heartbreak was preferable to watching "Valentine's Day."

"'Valentine's Day' is being marketed as a Date Movie. I think it's more of a First-Date Movie. If your date likes it, do not date that person again. And if you like it, there may not be a second date." —   Roger Ebert , Chicago Sun-Times.

Critics eviscerated "Twilight," but the movie still made more than $390 million at the box office.

"I've had mosquito bites that were more passionate than this undead, unrequited, and altogether unfun pseudo-romantic riff on 'Romeo and Juliet.'" — Marc Salov , The Austin Chronicle.  

"The Other Woman" wasn't a hit with critics.

"I know what you're thinking ... 'Enough beating around the bush. Just tell us whether you liked it.' Consider this, which I will say in terms this movie would understand, if you were on an airplane, 'The Other Woman'   might not be preferable to simply staring into your empty airsick bag, but it has enough nicely executed physical comedy that in the event you become ill, it is definitely preferable to staring into your occupied airsick bag." — Linda Holmes , NPR.

"The Emoji Movie" has an 8% fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

"This is a movie about how words aren't cool, but you can still expect a girl to fall at your feet in response to mild wordplay. Please keep up. Or throw whatever device you’re reading this on into the ocean. Send me a postcard ... tell me what it’s like to be free." — Kaitlyn Tiffany and Lizzie Plaugic , The Verge.

Netflix is making a sequel to "Bright" despite the fact it was totally panned by critics.

"While I had the misfortune to see 'Bright' in a theater, most people will simply press 'play' out of curiosity on their Roku remote. I am willing to concede that this might elevate the experience a little ... the ability to take a quick trip to the kitchen or restroom after shouting 'no, don't pause it' to your partner on the couch will be liberating." — Jordan Hoffman , Vanity Fair.

"Battlefield Earth" was a box-office bust and a critical failure.

"'Battlefield Earth' saves its scariest moment for the end: a virtual guarantee that there will be a sequel." — Desson Howe , The Washington Post.

The basic plot of "Milk Money" perplexed critics.

Roger Ebert imagined what the conversation between studio executives would have looked like when they greenlit the movie:

"Studio Executive A: Kind of like 'Working Girl Turns a Trick?'

"Studio Executive B: Cuter than that. We start with three 12-year-old boys. They're going crazy because they've never seen a naked woman.

"Studio Executive A: Whatsamatter? They poor? Don't they have cable?"

Even fans of the HBO series prefer to pretend "Sex and the City 2" doesn't exist, according to critics.

"When viewed as a rom-com, 'Sex and the City 2' is terrible and crappy and a horrific inversion of everything the show once was. But when viewed as a science fiction film, 'SATC2' is subversive, stylish and chilling. Like The Island from 'Lost,' we may never know The City's true identity — Is it a VR computer program? A malevolent interdimensional god? Satan?" — Cyriaque Lamar , i09.

Making fun of "Gigli" became a national past-time.

"Even making a little game of it, and trying to pinpoint the exact moment when Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez fell in love, stops being fun after a while. Perhaps it's when he says, in an attempt to seduce her, 'I'm the bull, you're the cow.' Or when she beckons him into foreplay by lying back in bed and purring, 'Gobble, gobble' — which could forever change the way you view your Thanksgiving turkey." — Christy Lemire , The Associated Press.

"The Adventures of Pluto Nash" wasn't a hit with critics.

"It's good to know that, if we have to leave Earth someday, we won't have to go without our kitsch. Forensics experts will be digging through the rubble of this fiasco for a long time, trying to reconstruct the accident. How did so many lines fall flat? Why were the action scenes so corny and unconvincing? Who put the stink on this?" — Jack Mathews , New York Daily News.

"Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2" has a 2% fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

" At its best/worst, 'Superbabies' hallucinatory idiocy inspires open-mouthed horror at what happens when an ill-conceived premise leads to even more jaw-droppingly misguided execution." — Nathan Rabin , AV Club.

Critics thought "Gotti" was so bad it was almost criminal.

"I'd rather wake up next to a severed horse head than ever watch 'Gotti' again. The worst movie of the year so far, the long-awaited biopic about the Gambino crime boss' rise from made man to top dog took four directors, 44 producers and eight years to make. It shows. The finished product belongs in a cement bucket at the bottom of the river." — Johnny Oleksinski , New York Post.

Critics got personal with their contempt for "Jaws: The Revenge."

"In the just-released 'Jaws: The Revenge' the shark's main course is intended to be Roy Scheider's widow, Ellen Brody, a frumpy middle-aged woman played by boring actress Lorraine Gary, who happens to be married to the president of MCA Universal, which finances the 'Jaws' films and which explains her lead role. Let's put it this way: When you see and hear the nasal Lorraine Gary on screen you want the shark to eat her." — Gene Siskel , Chicago Tribune.

"One Missed Call" didn't warrant anyone's attention, according to critics.

"The kid in front of me spent most of the movie playing Tetris on his phone. I didn't care enough about the movie to ask him to stop, or to find a cooler game." — Wesley Morris , The Boston Globe.

The critical response to "Jack Frost" was icy.

"With emotions as sincere as the soap flake snow on its sets, 'Jack Frost' goes on to show how much fun it is to have a snowman as a loving, though dead, father … As one more Hollywood effort to look on the sunny side of fatality, 'Jack Frost' is so sugarcoated that it makes other recent efforts in this genre look blisteringly honest." — Janet Maslin , The New York Times.

"The Snowman" left critics cold.

"'The Snowman' is like if aliens studied humanity and tried to make their own movie in an attempt to communicate with us. This simulacrum contains all the requisite pieces of a movie, but humanity got lost in translation." — Barbara VanDenburgh , The Arizona Republic.

Critics saw "Batman & Robin" as more of a cash-grab than a movie.

" The people who made this movie — which, as always, is set up for a sequel — will be laughing all the way to the bank. But isn't there someone in that bank who can lock them all inside a safety-deposit vault and throw away the key?" — Peter Rainer , The Phoenix New Times.

"Cool World" was almost universally hated by critics.

"The plot of Michael Grais' and Mark Victor's screenplay is even more nonsensical than it needs to be, revolving around frequent unmotivated trips between parallel cartoon and live-action universes, and around the question of whether cartoon women will have sex with human men." — Janet Maslin , The New York Times.

"Titanic" won 11 Academy Awards, but critics thought it took its sweet time getting to the point.

"'Titanic' is a good, often stunning movie caught in a three-and-a-half hour drift. As we marvel at the physical spectacle of the Titanic's last few hours, we're left staggeringly untouched by the people facing their last moments. This movie should have blown us out of the water. Instead, we catch ourselves occasionally thinking the unpardonable thought: 'OK, sink already.'" — Desson Howe , The Washington Post.

"Howard The Duck" was a one-note movie that prompted critics to question for whom exactly the movie was made.

"The story has no center; the duck is not likable, and the costly, overwrought, laser-filled special effects that conclude the movie are less impressive than a sparkler on a birthday cake. George 'Star Wars' Lucas supervised the production of this film, and maybe it's time he went back to making low-budget films like his best picture, 'American Graffiti.'" — Gene Siskel , The Chicago Tribune.

"Catwoman" is considered by critics to be one of the worst superhero movies ever made.

"The film could have turned out worse, but only via the addition of a Tom Green cameo, or an accident in which the actors caught on fire." — Keith Phipps , The AV Club

Critics thought "Mac and Me" was a discount version of "ET: The Extraterrestrial."

"'Mac and Me,' which opened yesterday at the Guild and other theaters, has a final police shootout and a fiery explosion in which Eric is the victim. When a doctor announced that Eric was gone, a small boy behind me said, 'He ain't dead,' with all the calm assurance of an experienced moviegoer who knows perfectly well that if E.T. came back, so would Eric. Cloning is a dangerous thing." — Caryn James , The New York Times.

Only a sucker would bother watching "Sucker Punch" after reading reviews.

"In the end, though the metaphor of mental institution as battleground is an interesting one to explore, that is not the analysis at the heart of this movie. Nope, 'Sucker Punch' is a two-hour $82 million fetish film examining how hot sad schoolgirls look when holding weapons. Snyder should have just made a porn movie — it might have been better, and it definitely would have been cheaper and more honest." — Dodai Stewart , Jezebel.

"Movie 43" prompted devastating reviews.

"It's as if 'Movie 43' was itself a feature-length f--- you to Hollywood, a movie made simply to show how bad a movie a studio could be induced to make and actors could be persuaded to act in." — Richard Brody , The New Yorker.

The best thing critics could say about "Fifty Shades Freed" was that the trilogy was finally over.

"Universal has had some fun with its marketing campaign, using the tag-line, 'Don't miss the climax.' It's a shame, though, that the posters exhibit considerably more ingenuity than the film itself." — Brian Lowery , CNN.

"A Christmas Prince" falls squarely in the category of "so bad it's good."

"It's a Netflix original movie, but it feels like a violation of nature that it somehow isn't from Lifetime or the Hallmark Channel. Nathan Atkins is credited with the screenplay, but this film is such a perfect amalgam of established tropes that I am not entirely convinced that isn't a pseudonym to keep us from discovering that Netflix has created the artificial-intelligence technology to generate a script using auto-complete." — Dana Schwartz , Entertainment Weekly.

"A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding" seemed to revel in shoddiness.

"It plays like a piece of Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan fan fiction, written by a child who actually doesn't know who they are but has watched the 'Princess Diaries' films." — Carly Mallenbaum , USA Today.

Critics thought "Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice" was far too depressing for a superhero movie.

"An even less charitable way to put it is that a clearly excited 7- or 8-year-old kid sitting in front of me busted out crying and had to be whisked out of the theater by his father within the first five minutes. Perhaps he was unnerved by the harsh, operatic violence of Bruce Wayne's parents getting murdered — the mom's pearls get tangled around the gun, somehow, which allows for some very tight and poignant slow motion — or maybe he was offended by the notion that a 2016 Batman movie felt it necessary to depict Bruce Wayne's parents getting murdered. Either way, this kid bounced." — Rob Harvilla , Deadspin.

Critics thought "Transformers: The Last Knight" was simply too incoherent to describe.

"I'll admit, I've been dreading the thought of trying to at all explain the plot of this movie — even in broad, simple terms. I honestly had anxiety dreams last night about this moment. It's like staring at a projected kaleidoscope for two and a half hours and then trying to tell someone about the plot." — Mike Ryan , Uproxx.

Many thought "The Brown Bunny" was tedious and only remembered for its inclusion of one explicit scene.

"It's not really a movie. I suppose it's what could be called a recorded behavior. It simply reproduces, with some crude fidelity, the hapless anguish of a grieving man as he copes with his loss. It has no characters, it has no conflict, it has nothing that could be called a plot. It offers no reason to watch it — that is, no reason within the picture." — Stephen Hunter , The Washington Post.

Critics were thoroughly disgusted by "The Human Centipede," but they were also bored by it.

"This is one of those movies where victims repeatedly have opportunities to escape but choose not to, guaranteeing still more grotesque degradation, full of gore, torture, and sexual humiliation — and contains not an iota of wit or intelligence to justify any of it." — Michael Ordoña , The Los Angeles Times.

"Avatar" is still the highest grossing movie of all time, but not everyone was a fan.

"' Avatar' isn't about actors or characters or even about story; it's about special effects, which is fine as far as it goes. But for a movie that stresses how important it is for us to stay connected with nature, to keep our ponytails plugged into the life force, 'Avatar' is peculiarly bloodless. It's a remote-control movie experience, a high-tech 'wish you were here' scribbled on a very expensive postcard. You don't have to be fully present to experience 'Avatar'; all you have to do is show up." — Stephanie Zacharek , Salon.

Critics thought "I Know Who Killed Me" was embarrassing for everyone involved.

"Pretentious and inane, 'I Know Who Killed Me' arouses unexpected sympathy for its embattled star. 'Should we populate the movie with competent, strong performances, or were we looking for stars?' asks the producer, Frank Mancuso Jr., in the film's production notes. Out of the mouths of producers." — Jeannette Catsoulis , The New York Times.

Critics thought there was nothing redeeming about "Sorority Boys."

"I'm curious about who would go to see this movie. Obviously moviegoers with a low opinion of their own taste. It's so obviously what it is that you would require a positive desire to throw away money in order to lose two hours of your life. 'Sorority Boys' will be the worst movie playing in any multiplex in America this weekend, and, yes, I realize 'Crossroads' is still out there." — Roger Ebert , The Chicago Sun-Times.

"Forrest Gump" won multiple Academy Awards, but it still prompted some biting reviews.

"With two decades of perspective on 'Forrest Gump's triumph, you get the sense that '90s audiences were relieved to see a film that said it was OK — even honorable — to ignore all the bad stuff about war. So, too, was the Motion Picture Academy, which 12 months after lauding 'Schindler's List'   decided, 'Screw it, let's give the awards to the movie that sells cookbooks.' — Amy Nicholson , LA Weekly.

Critics absolutely hated "Life Itself."

"'Life Itself' thinks you're stupid. Or, if not stupid, unable to understand how a movie should work. It's a movie made for people who can't be trusted to understand any storytelling unless it's not just spoon-fed but ladled on, piled high, and explained via montage and voiceover" — Kate Erbland , IndieWire.

"Ridiculous 6" felt intentionally offensive.

"There's the broad racism and misogyny of the piece. After the controversial walk-offs, Netflix claimed that this was 'satire.' It's not. There's nothing satirical about Sandler's bad Native American accent, which totally comes and goes, by the way, or Schneider's Hispanic caricature. Saying that this is satire is like the drunk guy at the bar telling you how many black friends he has after telling a racist joke. Don't fall for it." — Brian Tallerico , RogerEbert.com.

"The Village" felt like a waste of time to some.

" [M. Night Shyamalan] directs the material as if he'd written it (which he did), and not a single friend dared tell him the truth." — Mick LaSalle , SFGate.

The extreme level of product placement in "Crossroads" was an issue for critics.

"It turns out that 'Crossroads' is not a music video, not yet a movie, but more like an extended-play advertisement for the Product that is Britney." — Ann Hornaday, The Washington Post.

Critics thought "Grown Ups" was a lazy attempt at comedy.

"The movie is symptomatic of a social attitude that might be called the security of incompetence. There's something reassuring about a bad movie that doesn't ask you to think or feel or even pay attention ... we can all be happy D-minus students huddled together in communal self-disgust in a D-minus world." — Stephen Holden , The New York Times.

Critics thought "Grown Ups 2" was so bad that it made them appreciate the first movie.

"In 'Grown Ups 2,' which is set on the last day of school, our heroes are now all living in the same small town together, and everybody's pretty happy, so there's little to motivate the action. It makes the first movie look like 'The Maltese Falcon.'" — Bilge Ebiri , Vulture.

Some thought "Suburbicon" was too smug for its own good.

"You absolutely can fault [George Clooney] for wrongheadedness in making a movie that condemns racism, and specifically segregation in the postwar housing boom, albeit in the most broad, perfunctory, awareness-ribbon-wearing way while barely allowing its black characters to speak. 'Suburbicon' might be the biggest embarrassment to pious Hollywood liberalism since 'Crash' won best picture in 2006." — Chris Klimek , NPR.

"Mother!" may not have been enjoyable, but it certainly was memorable.

"I admired the camerawork, the wide-angle close-ups of flaring nostrils, and the pandemonium of the crowd scenes in the second half of the film when it goes haywire and insanity reign. It's an odd sensation to still remember moments of technical brilliance in a movie I never want to see again." — Rex Reed , The Observer.

Some thought "Freddy Got Fingered" was an embarrassment for everyone involved.

" This movie doesn't scrape the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't below the bottom of the barrel. This movie doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence with barrels." — Roger Ebert , Chicago Sun-Times.

Critics thought there just wasn't anything funny about "Joe Dirt."

"Why do American audiences accept the stance that silly movies have to be terrible by definition? There's nothing enjoyable about 'Joe Dirt.' Absolutely nothing. Spade's generic nonperformance is the centerpiece of a very wobbly story, and he simply isn't enough of an actor to keep you interested." — Paul Tatara , CNN.

Critics thought "Fantastic Four" was the opposite of fantastic.

"My notebook usually remains near my lap, but at this movie, it made involuntary trips over my mouth to cover all of my gasping. The entire experience is shameful — for us, for the filmmakers, for whoever at the studio had the job of creating the ads, in which the cast appear to be starring in hostage posters." — Wesley Morris , Grantland.

"From Justin to Kelly" was embarrassingly amateur, according to critics.

"How bad is 'From Justin to Kelly?' Set in Miami during spring break, it's like 'Grease: The Next Generation' acted out by the food-court staff at SeaWorld." — Owen Gleiberman , Entertainment Weekly.

"National Lampoon's Gold Diggers" has a 0% fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

"Just how repellent is 'National Lampoon's Gold Diggers?' So stupefyingly hideous that after watching it, you'll need to bathe in 10 gallons of disinfectant, get a full-body scrub and shampoo with vinegar to remove the scummy residue that remains. Some movies leave a bad taste in the mouth. This one causes full-on halitosis." — Jen Chaney , The Washington Post.

"Venom" was a tonally-uneven, muddled mess, according to most critics.

"For all of its cult potential, and my God, is this film rife with it, it is 'Venom's' insidious political intonations, which were entirely avoidable, that become the least palatable aspect of the film. And this is a movie where you see Tom Hardy eat out of a garbage can." — Sarah Tai-Black , The Globe and Mail.

"North" almost universally disliked by critics and prompted one of Roger Ebert's movie memorable reviews.

"' North' is one of the most unpleasant, contrived, artificial, cloying experiences I've had at the movies. To call it manipulative would be inaccurate; it has an ambition to manipulate, but fails … I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it." — Roger Ebert , Chicago Sun-Times.

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Comedic and Iconic Movie Lines: The Best One-Liners in Cinema

O ne-liners can be hilarious. Other movie one-liners are deep, even dark, while others are just straight up weird. Regardless of the genre, they’re usually remembered long after the movie’s release, and the words can impact an entire generation. Don’t believe me? See if you’ve ever said or heard any of these phrases in conversation. You might not even know what movie they’re from. But that’s okay!

We’ve curated a list of some of the best funny movie one-liners, some dramatic examples, and even a few creepy mentions. Let’s take a look.

Iconic, Dramatic, and Funny Movie One-Liners

The best movie one-liners.

Ranking seems silly but we did it anyway. We didn’t rank by category, just based on a gut feeling and what the line did for the scene or film.

What’s considered “the best” is always up for debate, and honestly, I’m not a fan of ranking. But, just for fun, let’s start with some classics and see where we end up. 

MIDNIGHT COWBOY

55. “i’m walking here”.

If you missed Dustin Hoffman's performance in  Midnight Cowboy , you likely didn't miss the famous phrase it bore. You know a line is truly indelible as this one when it gets parodied this many times.

Midnight Cowboy gives not only a line, but an attitude

54.  "i'm as mad as hell, and i'm not going to take this anymore".

You may have never seen  Network, but it's strangely relevant for today's socioeconomic and political climate.  Whichever side you sit, it's also just really good movie. 

Speech from Network sounds weirdly relevant today

Jerry maguire, 53.  “show me the money”.

Reiterated in many movies (most notably Austin Powers), "show me the money," is surely used by everyone, even those who have never seen Jerry Maguire . 

Tom Cruise and Cuba Gooding Jr. "show me the money" scene

Toy story 2, 52.  “to infinity and beyond”.

Now, I'm not sure this one-liner necessarily "beats" the few above in quality or depth, but its use spans (at least) two generations. Not to mention, the sequels are actually pretty good.

This also became the Buzz Lightyear toy catchphrase

It: chapter one,  51.  "now i'm gonna have to kill this f***ing clown.".

Actor, Finn Wolfhard delivers the line and it's probably the more badass than all of his lines from Stranger Things, combined. 

It movie ending one-liner

When harry met sally, 50.  "when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.".

And now we side-step over to romantic comedies. Cheesy or adorable, maybe a little bit of both, When Harry Met Sally boasts a few memorable one-liners. We'll see another a little later in the list. 

Billy Crystal's one-liner

49. “love means never having to say you’re sorry.”.

Aw, how many decorative wall art pieces did this inspire. Just kidding, cheesy or not, this line has been repeated a number of times since the film's release in 1970.

Run with him to a minute and 30 seconds to hear the line

48.  “shaken, not stirred.”.

For every corny dad out there, or maybe just for mine, because that's definitely how I learned this line. Luckily, I stopped saying it by the time I was actually old enough to order a drink.

This line was said in many Bond movies

Sudden impact, 47.  “go ahead, make my day.”.

Clint Eastwood had to make the list, so we went ahead and added this iconic scene from Sudden Impact.  

Wait for the one-liner towards the end of the scene

46. “here’s lookin at you, kid.”.

So famous and so iconic, you know that's true because this one really does span generations. 

One the most famous lines of all time

45.  “i’ll be back.”.

Said in the Terminator voice, of course. And often quickly followed by "Hasta la vista, baby." May we never forget how our 10-year-old selves used to leave a room.

Arnold Schwarzenegger in Terminator

Field of dreams, 44.  “if you build it, he will come.”.

Not to be confused with "if they build it, they will come," which never actually said in this film. But I guess people hear what they want to hear, thanks to the real phrase for giving us something to work with. Below, wait for it at about one minute and 30 seconds. 

Life lessons from Field of Dreams

E.t. the extra terrestrial, 43.  “e.t. phone home.”.

Yeah, sometimes we say this one for no real reason at all. It's cute, and it's a little weird, just like the movie. 

Drew Barrymore is almost as adorable as E.T.

Taxi driver, 42. “you talkin to me”.

The best part about this iconic movie one-liner is that it comes directly from De Niro improvising. 

Taxi Drive infamous movie one-liner

The shining, 41. “here’s johnny”.

And then there are those that are iconic because the level at which they freaked us the hell out. I've heard people say this in real life, and I really question who they are as a person.

And there he is: Jack Nicholson in the Shining

40.  “houston, we have a problem.”.

We do don't we? Because whenever you hear this phrase, there usually is an issue with whatever situation you're in. The gravity of how often this phrase is used is overwhelming. Pun absolutely intended. 

Tom Hanks delivers the famous line

39.  "yippie-ki-yay, motherf—er.".

Bruce Willis added the "the mother f--ker" part for fun. It did so well with the test audience, it stuck.  

Sometimes actors write the lines

A league of their own, 38.  “there’s no crying in baseball”.

Sage advice from Tom Hanks' Jimmy Dugan that can be applied to any situation. Love this film and this line. 

A League of Their Own movie one-liner

37. “i’m the king of the world”.

I've said this at least a hundred times as a kid. And maybe even as an adult, just in my head. 

Liberating movie one-liners

The usual suspects, 35.  "the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.".

I didn't even realize this was from a movie, I just assumed some sage said it. Maybe they did. Either way, it entered into the cultural ether in The Usual Suspects . 

One-liners frame interesting perspectives

Best in show, 34.  “we could not talk or talk forever and still find things to not talk about.”.

It doesn't really matter what's being said in this movie, it's all hilarious because the characters are incredible. To refresh your memory, or if you've never seen  Best in Show , watch below. 

Best in Show one-liner

Star wars: the last jedi, 33.  "the greatest teacher, failure is.".

Ah, yes, how could we leave Yoda out. Forget, we must not. Include him, we must. I don't know. Here's a good one-liner from Yoda. 

Learning from Yoda's one-liners

Spider-man: homecoming, 32. "if you're nothing without the suit, then you shouldn't have it.".

It's too new to be iconic, but I think it has the most depth than the majority of this list. Maybe one day it will be considered iconic, but for now, I'll just appreciate it for it's truth. 

Robert Downy Jr. schools Spiderman

When harry met sally, 31.  “i’ll have what she’s having.”.

Iconic, fun, and has probably been repeated by anyone capable of speaking. The rando who delivers the line is definitely not talking about food, but that's typically how it's used in real life. 

When Harry Met Sally has a few one-liners

30.  “i am serious. and don’t call me shirley.”.

Airplane! I love this movie! The humor can be enjoyed by literally anyone, and the plays on words are almost too perfect. 

Anyone who knows it probably loves this line

Frankenstein (1931), 29.  “it’s alive it’s alive”.

If this list reflected the most known phrases, this would be number one. It's actually a little creepier than I remember. I said it as a child so many times but now that I watch the clip, I'm not sure I'll want to pass it along to my own kids. Though, I'm sure they'll hear it somewhere. 

The original "It's alive!"

The jazz singer (1927), 28.  “you ain’t heard nothin yet.”.

There could probably be separate article just on how many times this one-liner was used in cinema. But it originated in 1920s.

How many times have you heard this?

Almost famous, 27. “i am a golden god”.

I'm not sure how often this is yelled from rooftops, but I personally have always wanted to. 

"I'm on drugs" isn't a terrible preface to this one-liner

26.  “as if.”.

Quite possibly one of the greatest teen movies of all time, Clueless created its own language, way before  Mean Girls  was a thing.

90s one-liners are always a favorite

The big lebowski, 25.  “the dude abides.”.

He sure does. I mean, is it really a one-liner or is it more of a motto? What's the difference? In light of the Dude, whatever.

Funny movie one-liners

24. “you’re gonna need a bigger boat.”.

Classic, iconic, and over-used. But it definitely deserves a mention. 

Infamous movie one-liners

23.  “may the force be with you.”.

So powerful, May the fourth is now Star Wars Day.

Bordering historic one-liner

22.  “i am your father.”.

This line is so ubiquitous, it's hard to imagine how powerful this twist actually was. 

Where would the movies be without this scene

The wizard of oz, 21.  “i'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too".

One of the most known phrases in cinematic history, this one-liner can give a child and a 90-year-old something to talk about.

Wizard of Oz one-liner

20. “your aura is purple.”.

Another  Almost Famous  line because what a great movie. Hippies love this one. I love this one. Your parents probably have never heard of it. 

Almost Famous is filled with great one-liners

Bridesmaids, 19.  “i’m glad he’s single, because i’m going to climb that like a tree.”.

Melissa McCarthy makes my life. She spits out ridiculousness regularly and while they can't be considered "classics" just yet, at least one of her lines deserves a spot.

Bridesmaids movie one-liner

The godfather, 18.  "i'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse.".

Back to basics, but not in the boring sense. This is one of those sayings that you probably forgot where it originated from. 

The Godfather famous lines

Pulp fiction, 17.  “they call it a royale with cheese.”.

Of course, we couldn't have a list of lines without Tarantino. John Travolta delivers hits magically delicious line in Pulp Fiction.

Try ordering this out

16.  "toto, i've a feeling we're not in kansas anymore.".

I think I heard someone say this before I even saw the movie, which is actually hard to accomplish, because this is like the first movie every child sees. 

Great set design aided this iconic phrase

Apocalypse now, 15.  "i love the smell of napalm in the morning.".

The fact that this one caught on in mainstream society reminds just how weird and awesome people can be. 

Famous Apocalypse Now move line

14.  “say hello to my little friend”.

Al Pacino gives us the best (violent) one-liner probably in cinematic history. It's ridiculous, and if we heard it today, it probably wouldn't even stick. But for some reason, Al Pacino in 1983 as Tony Montana wins every time. 

One of the most notorious lines in movie history

13.  “there’s no place like home.”.

This phrase and those ruby red slippers will be around forever. 

Most famous Wizard of Oz line

12.  “leave the gun. take the cannoli.”.

This probably should've been lower on the list in comparison to the "classics," but honestly, it's my favorite, and I say it's number 12. 

Best movie one-liners

The godfather part 2, 11.  “keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.".

So many quotes, life lessons, and ideas came from this franchise. It's crazy to think about how many parts of our speech and ways we think, actually came from cinema, especially mafia cinema.

Part 2 still delivering

10.  “this is not ‘nam. this is bowling. there are rules.”.

This one isn't "better" than The Godfather's lines, it's just number 10 because it's different, it's unique, and it's also perfectly stupid for this stupidly perfect movie.

John Goodman delivers the line

Gone with the wind, 9. "frankly, my dear, i don't give a damn.".

The OG of the best movie one-liners.

Gone with the Wind clip

Dr. strangelove, 8.  “gentlemen, you can’t fight in here. this is the war room”.

Even if you haven't seen it, just read it, it's amazing. 

Older one-liners

7. “what is this a center for ants.

Popularized amongst millennials, this one-liner has weirdly become one of the most comedic ways to express the size of anything.

Perfect way to end the film

The dark knight, 6.  “why so serious”.

This phrase introduced us to Heath Ledger's Joker. The first time we see him in The Dark Knight , is the first time we hear it, it was powerful then, and it still is now...though, still super creepy.

Ledger's line introduces us to his character

Jerry maguire, 5.  “you had me at hello.”.

Probably the most romantic movie one-liner ever. I wish I could go back to the day I heard it for the first time.

Watch the full scene

Back to the future, 4.  “roads where we’re going, we don’t need roads.”.

I still say this, all the time. It makes no sense when I say it, and that's the power of it. It's fantastical, quirky, and everybody loves it. 

Back to the Future one-liner

3.  “she doesn’t even go here”.

This line is in this particular spot because I think it's more difficult for younger films to get noticed for their incredible one-liners. Films like The Godfather , Star Wars , or what's considered "classic cinema" tend to get all of the attention for noteworthy lines. 

She doesn't even go here

The silence of the lambs, 2. “i’m having an old friend for dinner.” .

I cringe just thinking about this, but it's also so good and perfect for what's actually going on in the film.

What a line

1.  "i told you not to go in that house.".

Okay, so this line may not be something repeated for generations, but it will definitely be remembered. It brings the film full circle and it's a near perfect ending. It may not be a universal line like those in The Godfather , but I put it here because not only does it provide comedic relief for the scene, it provides it for the entire film. 

One-liners bring comedic relief in Get Out

Best movie taglines & why they work.

You saw some of the best examples of one-liners in movie history, but how good are you at describing the entire film in a line. If you're a writer, you'll probably have to do that at some point. Learn from the best in the next article. 

Up Next: Best Movie Taglines → 

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Best Movie One Liners: Top One Liners From Films

Ever watched a movie and found yourself repeating that one killer line over and over?

We’ve all been there, caught up in the magic of a perfectly timed zinger that’s both iconic and endlessly quotable.

From the chilling to the chuckle-inducing, we’re diving into the realm of the best movie one-liners that have left their mark on cinematic history.

Get ready to nod in agreement or even discover a few gems you might’ve missed.

MOVIE ONE LINERS

What are movie one liners.

Movie one-liners are memorable, succinct phrases from films that capture the essence of a character, a moment, or the film itself.

These lines often become part of popular culture and are remembered long after the movie’s release. 

They can be humorous, dramatic, poignant, or inspirational, and are typically delivered at pivotal moments in the film.

Their effectiveness lies in their ability to convey a significant idea or emotion in a concise and impactful way.

Classic Movie One-liners

In the tapestry of cinema, certain threads are woven with more vibrant hues than others – iconic phrases that have transcended their silver screen origins.

The collective consciousness of moviegoers is often defined by powerful snippets of dialogue.

• The Godfather gives us the chilling offer that’s impossible to refuse, embedding a sense of the Mafia’s invincibility in our minds.
• From Dirty Harry, we’ve learned what happens when you feel lucky — or at least, when Clint Eastwood’s Harry Callahan challenges you to ponder your fortune.
• When Scarlett O’Hara asserts that tomorrow is another day in Gone with the Wind, it’s more than optimism; it’s a testament to the enduring human spirit.

Not merely filler between action scenes, one-liners serve as narrative linchpins – a confluence of character, timing, and thematic resonance.

We find these moments in films like The Wizard of Oz, where a simple declaration of not being in Kansas anymore transports us into a fantastical odyssey alongside Dorothy.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/QBRCegxuOko

Some lines become the soul of the film itself.

For instance: In Casablanca , Rick’s “Here’s looking at you, kid” captures a timeless romance that lingers long after the credits roll.

Terminator’s “I’ll be back” merges the foreboding with the inevitable, etching Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character in sci-fi legend.

These one-liners offer a quicksilver quality – they encapsulate entire narratives within a handful of words, a feat of cinematic brevity that demands recognition.

As we jump further into our analysis, it’s clear that a great line is as much about delivery as it is scripting.

The actors breathe life into these words, making them immortal.

By examining such iconic quips, we’re not just remembering a flickering image on a screen.

We’re acknowledging the imprint these words have left on pop culture and our own viewing experiences.

These snippets of dialogue have set the stage for countless imitations and references across different media, further cementing their legacy.

As we explore various genres and eras, it’s apparent that the power of a succinct phrase can be just as impactful as the most elaborate monologue.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ki_qAyE-ytA

Action-packed movie one-liners.

Action films are synonymous with high-octane sequences and even more explosive dialogue.

It’s no surprise that some of the most unforgettable one-liners come from the genre that embraces thrill and spectacle.

These punchy quotes have done more than just underscore moments of intensity – they have become synonymous with the characters that deliver them and reflect the ethos of the action genre itself.

In  Die Hard , Bruce Willis’ dry delivery of “Yippee-Ki-Yay, Motherfucker” elevates the moment from just another showdown to cinematic legend.

Similarly,  Terminator’s  “I’ll Be Back” is a perfect blend of foreboding promise and robotic terseness.

These statements are crafted with such finesse that they remain etched in memory, often outliving the movies they come from.

Action one-liners often serve a dual purpose –

• They offer a release of tension during high stakes scenarios,
• Provide character insights in an immediate, relatable manner.

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s penchant for catchphrases in films like  Predator,  with “Get to the Choppa!”, showcases his character’s urgency and leadership amidst chaos.

Meanwhile, Clint Eastwood’s “Go Ahead, Make My Day” from  Sudden Impact  exemplifies a no-nonsense attitude that’s become emblematic of his on-screen persona.

One-liners also reinforce the signature style of renowned directors.

Funny Movie One-liners

When we jump into the realm of comedy, movie one-liners are not just lines – they’re meticulously crafted verbal juggernauts that pack a punchline.

Films like Airplane and The Naked Gun have gifted us with rapid-fire wit that keeps audiences chuckling decades later.

These quips don’t just make us laugh; they often hold a mirror to society, parodying everything from politics to pop culture.

In the hands of comedic geniuses like Mel Brooks or the Farrelly Brothers, a one-liner can become the highlight of a movie.

Take for example the line  There’s Something About Mary  – “I say we need more lemon Pledge.

” It’s a subtle nod to not only the character’s personality but also the plight of the overlooked and underappreciated.

Throughout cinematic history, filmmakers have harnessed the power of humor to create memorable moments that resonate beyond the screen.

• Ghostbusters: “Dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!” – here’s a comedic prophecy that encapsulates the chaotic fun of the film,
• Caddyshack: “So I got that goin’ for me, which is nice.” – a line that’s become synonymous with finding a silver lining in a bizarre situation,
• Step Brothers: “Did we just become best friends?” – a question that’s echoed in real-life moments of bonding.

These lines, while hilarious, are more than just spoken words.

They’re culturally significant markers in film, acting as social commentary and offering insights into the human condition.

Understanding the context in which these one-liners were delivered is crucial, for they serve not only as entertainment but also as a reflection of the times.

As we keep quoting and reliving these lines, they’ll remain timeless, reminding us of the power of a single line to capture the heart of a story.

Frequently Asked Questions

What are some examples of iconic action movie one-liners.

Iconic action movie one-liners include “Yippee-ki-yay, mother******” from Die Hard and “I’ll be back” from Terminator.

These phrases are emblematic of their characters and genre.

How Do Action One-liners Benefit A Movie?

Action one-liners serve to relieve tension and provide insights into a character’s personality or outlook, adding depth and memorable moments to films.

Can You Mention A Few Directors Known For Their Signature One-liners?

Directors like Quentin Tarantino are known for crafting unique one-liners that capture the essence of their films and leave a lasting impression.

What Role Do Comedic One-liners Play In Movies?

Comedic one-liners are designed to deliver humor while often providing commentary on societal issues, becoming cultural markers that can reflect and parody current events.

What Is The Significance Of Memorable One-liners In Cinema?

Memorable one-liners from movies can define a character, encapsulate the essence of a film, and transcend beyond the screen to become part of everyday language and culture.

Why Should We Appreciate Underrated Movie One-liners?

Underrated one-liners are noteworthy for their wit and ability to convey deep themes or character emotions.

They contribute to the richness of film narratives and deserve recognition for their clever writing.

Ready to learn about more Film History & Film Movements?

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10 best changes the lord of the rings movies made from the books, every lord of the rings actor who’s also in the mcu, ranked.

Great movie one-liners are hard to forget. These bits of witty or poignant dialog become popular, as they can be referenced in various outlets, sometimes becoming better known than the movies they originated from.

Related: 10 Best Fantasy Movie Openings

A great movie on-liner is not remembered because people have seen the movie, rather the movie is known through that one-line. Word of mouth is a powerful tool, and it is what has helped so many movie one-liners to become as popular as they are. One-liners are carried through time as they make appearances on shows, other movies, and social media outlets, taking on lives of their own.

10 "Go Ahead, Make My Day"

Sudden impact (1983).

Clint Eastwood's most famous role is as Dirty Harry in Sudden Impact . In the film, Eastwood has an abundance of great movie one-liners, but his line " Go ahead, make my day " stands out more than the others. People know this line regardless of whether they've seen the film or not.

This makes his line " Go ahead, make my day " one of the most notable lines of Clint Eastwood's acting career. The line is so notable in fact, that Clint Eastwood signed his own rendition of the popular movie line alongside his name and hand prints on Hollywood Boulevard.

9 "I'll Be Back"

The terminator (1984).

Arnold Schwarzenegger took his line " I'll be back " and made it one of the most famous movie lines in cinema history. Almost 30 years have passed since the release of The Terminator , and people still utter " I'll be back " before making their exit.

Related: 10 Movie Franchises That Got Progressively Worse

There are several other great lines that came from The Terminator franchise, but " I'll be back " has taken the number one spot. The line has become so iconic that Arnold Schwarzenegger cannot say those three words without viewers relating it back to his role in The Terminator .

8 "With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility"

Spider-man (2002).

While Uncle Ben's classic line " With great power comes great responsibility " has been known by comic fans for over 60 years, it was 2002's Spider-Man that turned it into a pop culture sensation. Twenty years later, and the quote is still being used in shows, movies, and by fans around the world. To make the quote more iconic it was re-used by Aunt May in Spider-Man: No Way Home .

Movie viewers don't need to have seen Spider-Man in order to know the famous line said by Uncle Ben. The line remains just as popular as it was twenty years ago. " With great power comes great responsibility" is a line that will live on for years to come.

7 "I Am Your Father"

Star wars: the empire strikes back (1980).

Star Wars has become a large franchise, and people do not need to be a fan in order to know that Darth Vader told Luke Skywalker " I am your father. " It was a moment of awe as those words were first spoken on screen. Fans had chills as the scene was filled with tension, making Darth Vader's line all the more empowering.

Related: 10 Best Star Wars Lightsabers, Ranked

The line was an attempt to persuade Luke Skywalker to join his father on the dark side. Darth Vader believed they would become more powerful if they were to join forces. Despite the line's popularity it often gets misused as " Luke, I am your father. " Regardless of its misuse, the line is considered to be one of the most popular movie lines.

6 "There's No Place Like Home"

The wizard of oz (1939).

After being lost in the land of Oz, Dorothy can't help but think " There's no place like home. " It is one of the oldest movie lines that can still be heard today. People will find themselves out and about at places they dislike and will reference the line " there's no place like home " while clicking their heels together.

The Wizard of Oz is nearing its 85th anniversary, and during that time, Dorothy's line has become rather famous and well-known throughout the world. " There's no place like home " is referenced by viewers, other shows, and movies as well.

5 "You're A Wizard, Harry"

Harry potter and the sorcerer's stone (2001).

The scene where Harry Potter meets Hagrid is both memorable and important to the Harry Potter series, both in the books and the movies. Hagrid states his iconic line, " You're a wizard Harry, " and Harry Potter is in disbelief. Not only is the line memorable, but the scene helps guide viewers to the beginning of Harry Potter's journey.

Hagrid's line " You're a wizard Harry " sets the foundation for the story. It is a turning point in both the book and the film. Hagrid's one line tells Harry more about his family and his past than he had ever known before.

4 "You're Killing Me, Smalls!"

The sandlot (1993).

Hamilton Porter, better known as Ham in The Sandlot repeatedly used his popular line, " You're killing me, Smalls! " throughout the film. In several scenes, Ham states his famous line, which adds a bit more comedy to the scene. Ham simply calls out his friend's lack of baseball knowledge by saying " You're killing me, Smalls !"

Hamilton's line is referenced across social media, among movie fans, and friend groups alike. Referencing Ham's line adds a bit of comedic flair to the conversation and gets people laughing. The line may very well be more popular than The Sandlot itself.

3 "You Shall Not Pass!"

Lord of the rings: the fellowship of the ring (2001).

In perhaps the most pivotal scene in Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, Gandalf sacrifices himself to save Frodo and the others from the Balrog. The powerful wizard paused to break the pathway as he yelled " You shall not pass! " and made his promise true as the Balrog plummeted into the abyss, but not before taking Gandalf along with it. Gandalf's line is one of the most memorable moments of the Lord of the Rings trilogy .

Surprisingly enough, it is not the same line that was written in the book. J.R.R. Tolkien wrote the line as " You cannot pass ." While both lines hold the same significance, is still uttered by fans today.

2 "Stop Blowing Holes In My Ship!"

Pirates of the caribbean: the curse of the black pearl (2003).

Throughout the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, Jack Sparrow says some very memorable lines. However, " Stop blowing holes in my ship! " takes the cake, as it is often used in memes and other references across social media. In Pirates Of The Caribbean: The Curse Of The Black Pearl , Jack Sparrow is held captive on his own ship and helplessly watches the Black Pearl be pelted by the Interceptor.

Related: 10 Actors Who Have Played More Than One Iconic Character

No one loves the Black Pearl more than Jack Sparrow, so it is understandable when he yells out his famous line while his ship is being bombarded by the Interceptor. Fans reference this line during moments when they feel the same kind of frustration Jack Sparrow felt.

1 "To Infinity And Beyond!"

Toy story (1995).

At the beginning of Toy Story , Buzz Lightyear believes he is real , and thus believes he can fly. With this came Buzz's famous line, " To infinity and beyond! " The line quickly became popular, as fans can no longer say " to infinity " without adding " and beyond " afterward.

Buzz Lightyear gifted fans with a memorable line to reference. The line only becomes more notable as Buzz's best friend Woody takes a turn with the catchphrase. Buzz says the line throughout the Toy Story franchise making " To infinity and beyond " hard to forget.

Next: 10 Movies That Don't Deserve Their Popularity (& Why)

• The Lord of the Rings

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Beauty & The Beast's Belle Becomes A Winter Princess In Stunningly Detailed Disney Cosplay

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While people don't necessarily go to action movies for the dialogue, there are occasionally some memorable quotes. The action movie one-liner is a beloved aspect of the genre with some of them becoming iconic movie quotes. But while some of them are meant to be tough and intimidating, some of them are just plain hilarious.

RELATED: 10 Best Action Movie Catchphrases Of All Time, Ranked

It's true that some of these lines might not necessarily be meant as funny, but they are entertaining nonetheless. Others are able to balance to cool action movie tone with some humor, and there are some that are funny for how they poke fun at the usual action one-liner.

"Something Cool!" - 22 Jump Street (2014)

The series 21 Jump Street was a cheesy cop show that launched the careers of many Hollywood actors . However, few could have predicted the movie version would not only be a wildly entertaining action-comedy but also delivers an equally terrific sequel.

The hero cops, Schmidt and Jenko, see themselves as real action movie heroes, even wanting to deliver the cool one-liner. When Jenko is about to throw a grenade at the bad guy, Schmidt reminds him to say something cool. Jenko takes that literally and yells "Something cool!"

"I Have Had It With These Motherf***Ing Snakes On This Motherf***Ing Plan" - Snakes On A Plane (2006)

There have been a variety of action movie sequences set on planes , but only one that also includes a lot of snakes. Legend has it that Samuel L. Jackson only signed on to Snakes on a Plane because of the title and the movie gradually transformed into a semi-parody from there.

Given Jackson's penchant for saying a particular curse word in most of his movies, this new line was written. It is a purposely ridiculous line that is a wink and the audience and delivered with the perfect amount of passion by Mr. Jackson.

"Some Motherf***Ers Are Always Trying To Ice Skate Uphill" - Blade (1998)

While it remains to be seen if the MCU's Blade will be R-rated , the Wesley Snipes version fully embraced the more mature content. While this allowed for some gory moments, it also gave Snipes the opportunity to let loose with some memorable curses.

When the villainous Deacon Frost transforms into an all-powerful vampire god, Blade is not too impressed. Just before delivering his final blow, Blade offers these hilarious words of wisdom. It's not clear how much these words really relate to the moment at hand, but it is a surprisingly profound idea.

"I'm Gonna Take You To The Bank Senator Trent. To The Blood Bank" - Hard To Kill (1990)

Despite being one of the biggest action movie stars in the 1980s and 1990s, Steven Seagal was never much of an actor. With an intense delivery and lack of emotion, most of Seagal's lines ended up being unintentionally hilarious.

RELATED:  Steven Seagal's Funniest Quotes From His Films

A lot of these one-liners seem to know they are being funny, but this iconic one from Hard to Kill is delivered with such sincerity that it is hard not to roll on the ground laughing every time Seagal says it.

"Let Off Some Steam, Bennett" - Commando (1985)

There are few action movie heroes who can deliver a corny one-liner as well as Arnold Schwarzenegger. While these types of lines became a staple of his career, Commando is probably the movie with the most quotable lines.

During Schwarzenegger's final fight with the villain Bennett, he makes easy work of the inferior foe. In an amazing final move, Schwarzenegger rips a steam pipe from the ceiling and throws it through Bennett's torso. The line is wonderfully obvious and made even better by the sight gag of the pipe still letting off steam while impaled in the bad guy.

"I Have Come Here To Chew Bubblegum And Kick Ass. And I'm All Out Of Bubblegum" - They Live (1988)

They Live is a very fun and underrated action sci-fi romp from iconic filmmaker John Carpenter. The movie is also a great showcase for pro wrestler Roddy Piper who plays the cool hero of the story.

Piper cements himself in action movie history in this famous scene where he enters a bank that is filled with disguised aliens. Wielding a shotgun, Piper makes this glorious declaration that is the perfect balance of being eye-rolling silly and admirably badass.

"Dying Ain't Much Of A Living, Boy" - The Outlaw Josey Wales (1976)

Though his career is filled with many great roles, Clint Eastwood's career in Westerns is the stuff of Hollywood legend. He brings a swagger and confidence to these cowboy roles that makes the audience immediately cheer for him.

RELATED:  The 7 Westerns Directed By Clint Eastwood, Ranked (According To IMDb)

One of his best Westerns, The Outlaw Josey Wales , gives Eastwood a number of great one-liners. When a gunman corners him, Wales asks if the man is a bounty hunter. The man confirms that he is, saying it's a way of making a living. But Wales argues with total calmness, "Dying ain't much of a living, boy." It is a clever and ultra-cool line that puts a smile on the face of any viewer.

"Hey Terrorist! Terrorize This" - Team America: World Police (2004)

Another movie that plays against the tropes and silliness of the action genre is Team America: World Police . The movie uses marionette puppets to create a Michael Bay-like action story about a team of world-saving soldiers.

Despite the use of puppets, this is actually a solid action movie while also having fun with the genre. During the opening action scene, one of the soldiers delivers this action hero line. What is great about the quote is that it sounds like a typical action line at first, but giving it some more thought, it actually doesn't make any sense.

"You're The Rocket Man" - The Rock (1996)

Nicholas Cage appeared in many action movies throughout his career, but there was a time when he was quite an unexpected actor to become an action hero. It was The Rock that launched this stage of Cage's career.

What is great about the movie is that it lets Cage be in an action movie while also embracing his awkwardness and quirkiness. When cornered by a bad guy, Cage tries to make small talk and asks if he likes the Elton John song "Rocket Man" then launches a rocket into the man. It is such a random line that fits Cage perfectly.

"Yeah, Well I'm Taller" - Speed (1994)

Keanu Reeves was the king of action movies in the 1990s and perhaps his greatest moment was in Speed . Most of the intense and entertaining action of the movie takes place on the speeding bus, but there is a thrilling sequence at the end when Reeves battles Dennis Hopper's villain atop a subway.

Hopper's character manages to get on top of Reeves while beating him and taunting him that he is smarter than Reeves. In response, Reeves lifts Hopper's head until he is decapitated by one of the tunnel lights. Reeves then points out to the headless man, "Yeah, well I'm taller."

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Minutes before showtime it appeared it would not fly and nothing was going right, even to the point of Michaels getting accidentally sprayed with red paint from a machine that had not been operating properly. The decision to go live was still in doubt just 10 minutes before when Tebet, fully doubting Michaels, says, “Show me Saturday Night.” Your pulse will be pounding watching this remarkable scene take hold.

Remarkably, there is such a wealth of pure gold comic situations inherent in this idea that Saturday Night becomes an even better movie than all of the comedies that were spawned by the talent honed on SNL (many produced by Michaels himself). Before its world premiere at the Telluride Film Festival on Saturday night (of course), Reitman said his two dreams were to be a director and to write on SNL. Here he has merged both with a treasure trove of material that has been hiding in plain sight over the past half century but now has been turned into the funniest film of 2024, no easy trick since making a movie about making comedy is full of landmines. This crew doesn’t step on any of them.

Of course it is also that casting that makes the difference in buying into this at all, so many of the actors asked to play such recognizable stars, and they all hit it out of the park. Anchoring it all is LaBelle’s Michaels, and he hits the perfect tone throughout surrounded by nightmarish events that threaten to blow his dream to smithereens. Other standouts in a cast full of them are Cory Michael Smith’s spot-on Chevy Chase; Lamorne Morris’s Garrett Morris (no relation), who gets a choice scene doing a musical warm-up number; Matt Wood’s John Belushi, playing a comic genius on the edge; Nicholas Braun ‘s twin roles of Jim Henson and Andy Kaufman; Tommy Dewey’s cutting Michael O’Donoghue, a key creative component of the early SNL; and a chilling, pitch-perfect J.K. Simmons as ’50s NBC Variety kingpin Milton Berle, a perfect juxtaposition to NBC’s comedy past just as he stops by NBC’s about-to-be comedy future . Simmons nails Berle’s visit to the set, amidst all this chaos , in a brief but unforgettable turn that has to be seen to be believed (and that includes his legendary manhood).

With less screen time, Ella Hunt’s lovely Gilda Radner, Kim Matula’s Jane Curtin and Emily Fairn’s Larraine Newman hit their marks here as well, especially in the female construction worker sketch re-created for the movie with a riotous Dylan O’ Brien’s Dan Aykroyd as the sexual object of their affection. Rachel Sennott is also excellent as writer Rosie Shuster, who was trying to keep her marriage to Michaels secret. And a personal shout-out to Finn Wolfhard as the hapless NBC page standing in front of 30 Rock hocking tickets to get people in to see this new show no one had ever heard of. It kind of made me tear up a bit because two days later after SNL’s premiere I would start my first show business job as an NBC page.

One false move and this whole ambitious soufflé could have fallen, but Reitman steers this all in style creating on the great movies about show business I have ever seen — and I have seen a lot of them. It is a shame that comedy is not always given its due, often dismissed as light compared to heavy dramas, the kind usually on display at Telluride and other festivals. Saturday Night is a breath of fresh air, and I know Reitman’s father, the late great Ivan Reitman whose films include Ghostbusters, Stripes, Twins and on and on, would be a proud dad.

Producers are Jason Blumenfeld, Peter Rice, Reitman and Kenan.

Title: Saturday Night Festival: Telluride Distributor: Columbia Pictures Release date: October 11, 2024 Director: Jason Reitman Screenwriters: Gil Kenan & Jason Reitman Cast: Gabriel LaBelle, Rachel Sennott, Corey Michael Smith, Ella Hunt, Dylan O’Brien, Emily Fairn, Matt Wood, Lamorne Morris, Kim Matula, Finn Wolfhard, Nicholas Braun, Cooper Hoffman, Andrew Barth Feldman, Kaia Gerber, Tommy Dewey, Willem Dafoe, J.K. Simmons, Jon Batiste, Naomi McPherson Running Time: 1 hr and 43 mins

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The Greatest Movie One-Liners Right Before Someone Dies

Everything is larger than life at the movies — including death.

For most of us, our final moments are likely to be fairly un-cinematic — a quiet gathering of friends and family, or a sudden medical crisis that's over before anyone has a chance to react, or simply passing away while we sleep. Whatever the circumstances, it's generally unlikely that we or anyone around us will have the presence of mind to offer a classic quip before we kick the bucket. In the movies, however, it happens all the time.

The long list of snappy one-liners delivered right before a character's death includes some of the best moments in cinema history — in fact, you can probably quote a good chunk of the best deadly blockbuster zingers. With that in mind, we've rounded up a group of the most memorable, from hit films we've all seen countless times to contemporary classics in the making. Get ready for some surprises as we unpack the greatest movie one-liners uttered right before someone dies.

The little friend

Al Pacino's Tony Montana is not one to go down without a fight — much less a fight without a little trash talk. That's why in Scarface , when Montana enrages a business colleague and inadvertently signs his own death warrant, he doesn't take the execution sitting down. He saddles up with a grenade launcher, plops himself in front of his cocaine-coated desk, and shouts the words "Say hello to my little friend!" before unloading on his own office's front door, instantly killing a bevy of goons on the other side. From there, he goes on to slay dozens of would-be assassins, eating bullets all the while until he eventually keels over like a great white shark with one too many harpoons in him.

Though the high-stakes plot circumstances are the primary reason this line is so epic, Pacino's performance doesn't hurt. With his character high off his rocker from cocaine, Pacino hams it up and fuses the drug-induced haze with his already lively accent to deliver Tony Montana's last one-liner in grand fashion.

Is this Persia? No...

Few film lines in history have become quite as much of a meme as "This is Sparta," otherwise known as the adult variant of the classic ironic warcry "For Narnia!" On many an Xbox Live server, you can hear wisecracking 20-somethings saying it before executing an insane killstreak in Call of Duty or some other violent game, as they remind everyone that Sparta means business.

Where does this now-mainstream line hail from, though? One of director Zack Snyder's many ultra-quotable action films, of course — in this case, 300 . At one point in the film, a Persian messenger relays a message from his king demanding the surrender of the Spartans. Leonidas (Gerard Butler), leader of the Spartans, responds by kicking the messenger down a well while yelling "This is Sparta!" in the most over-the-top way humanly possible. It's this level of ham and sheer testosterone that has led to the phrase becoming the cool, albeit terribly silly punchline it is today.

He doesn't have to save you

It's always tricky when you're a hero with a no-kill rule who, for obvious reasons, sometimes has to kill in order to keep dangerous supervillains off the streets. How do you circumvent your own rule in order to eliminate a threat while still maintaining moral superiority? In Batman Begins , Bruce Wayne figures out the trick: you don't have to kill them, but you also don't have to come to their rescue when fate intervenes.

That's how he navigates his own moral grey area while throwing down with Ra's Al Ghul aboard a subway train that's slated to crash. Once he's got Ghul right where he wants him, Batman opts to vacate the train instead of dealing the finishing blow to his opponent. As he prepares to depart, Ghul asks him the question "Have you finally learned to do what is necessary?" To this, the caped crusader cooly responds "I won't kill you... but I don't have to save you." Then he flies out of the train car and lets it reach its final destination, with a defenseless Ra's Al Ghul trapped inside.

The worst time of the day

"Time to meet God" is the insanely intense line Alejandro (the titular sicario) mutters in Spanish before turning his silenced pistol on a family at a dinner table, murdering a man's wife and children in front of him.

Throughout the movie, the viewers have been groomed to understand Alejandro isn't a hero or villain — he's an ugly, pitiable depiction of moral ambiguity woven into the body of a cold-blooded killer. Sometimes he does things we can root for, sometimes he doesn't. And sometimes, as in the case of this line, he does something we can't make up our minds about. After all, the man he's torturing in this scene is the one who was responsible for his own wife and daughter dying in acid, so he's only paying back the favor (and preventing any future generations' revenge attempts in the process). Still, is there ever a scenario where one can cheer on a character who murders innocent bystanders?

Sicario asks us to confront the tough questions about humanity and right versus wrong, and no single moment sums up the movie's themes better than this one. "Time to meet God" is the marquee quote of a film where lethal judgment is everywhere, yet worthy judges are nowhere to be found.

We're the other Avengers

This checks all the boxes for being on a "greatest one-liners" list: does it subtly incorporate the title of the movie? Yes. Is it curt but effective? Yes. Does the hero call the bad guy a profane name right before executing them? You betcha.

At the climax of Guardians of the Galaxy , after thousands of Nova Corps deaths, Groot's heroic sacrifice, and a lot of struggle on the titular Guardians' part, they finally manage to acquire the power stone and turn it against Ronan the Accuser, the bad guy responsible for their movie's worth of struggles. Ronan initially has no fears when he sees Peter Quill wield the stone, assuming its immense power will kill him instantly. However, when Peter successfully manages to hold onto it with the assistance of his fellow Guardians, Ronan realizes his mistake. He wails a pithy "You're mortal; how?" to which Peter says the most badass finisher in the history of the MCU: "You said it yourself, b****: we're the Guardians of the Galaxy." Then Peter supercharges Ronan with a lethal dose of power stone energy, instantly killing him. Combined with some epic camerawork and a roaring soundtrack, this killer end-of-battle line arguably remains the coolest finale moment in all of the MCU.

All out of bubblegum

There's nothing quite as cool as Roddy Piper wielding a shotgun, something  They Live reminds us of repeatedly. Piper's goal throughout the movie is to handle some aliens that are causing trouble on Earth. The issue is that the aliens can disguise themselves as humans. To combat this, Piper wears a special pair of sunglasses that can differentiate between extraterrestrials and normal people. Does this make any sense? Of course not. And neither does the sentence he spits when he enters a bank loaded with disguised aliens. Armed with his special shades and a shotgun, Piper says the magic words with the utmost composure and confidence: "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubblegum." Having announced his lack of bubblegum, he starts dispatching aliens with extreme prejudice, and it's awesome — much like the whole movie and every line of its wondrously cheesy dialogue.

A robot's word

While the line is simple and its cultural impact unmistakable, even Arnold Schwarzenegger himself never expected the three words "I'll be back" to stick like they did. Heck, there was a period where it wasn't even clear that dialogue would make it into the movie, given that Schwarzenegger wasn't a fan of delivering the quote exactly as it was written (the rumor is that he couldn't pronounce the script's "I'll" contraction properly due to his thick Austrian accent). 

Thankfully, fates aligned and we ultimately received the endlessly quotable quip Cameron always wanted us to hear. Saying the phrase "I'll be back" is now a legitimate threat if spoken under the right circumstances, and it all stems from Schwarzenegger's 1984 Terminator T-800 coolly telling a cop that he'll return after being denied entry to a police station. Seconds later, Schwarzenegger makes good on that promise in his car, ramming through the station's doors and lobby, crushing the on-duty officer to death. The moral of the story: don't make the Terminator come back.

To die a monster, or not to die a monster

It takes some serious wit and quite a bit of nerve to dish out a memorable one-liner before you kill someone else. Can you imagine being able to think clearly enough to spit out a cool line if the person you had to kill was yourself, though?

That's what Dr. Otto Octavius does in Spider-Man 2 . Towards the end of the movie, he has to sink a volatile reactor before it can cause untold damage to New York City. To do this, he uses his robotic arms to rip it from its base and haul it to the bottom of the body of water it's situated above — a task that requires him to safely carry it right 'til the bitter end. Octavius, ever the closeted hero, does his duty with no qualms. He says to no one in particular (besides himself and his strangely sentient arms), "I will not die a monster," then takes the reactor to its — and his — final resting place.

The king is dead

As far as the greatest villainous one-liners before someone dies go, Scar's final words to Mufasa might just be king of the hill. If the kids and parents watching The Lion King weren't already intimidated enough by Scar's ruthlessness and menace, his most sinister quip seals the deal: "Long live the king," he taunts before letting Mufasa fall to his death. It's arguably the coldest bit of dialogue in any animated Disney movie ever, and as a result, it's also one of the greatest. And it's not just great because it's cruel, it's great because it's Shakespearean. It captures the high-minded themes of the movie — leadership, family, and betrayal — and boils them down to a single sentence that sounds like it was ripped right out of a classic Elizabethan play.

For all of those reasons, this line remains one of the best single pieces of dialogue in Disney's entire repertoire. Only time will tell if they ever let another property get dark enough to attempt to usurp Scar's "most quotable Disney villain" throne.

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Latest stories, the 30 funniest movie one-liners of all time, "what is this, a center for ants".

From life lessons that bear repeating to meme-ified lines that have become part of our cultural lexicon, these hilarious movie one-liners are sure to crack you up. And when you want to impress your friends with your movie knowledge, check out these 30 Movie Facts That Will Blow Your Mind .

1 | "She doesn't even go here!"

Mean Girls (2004)

-Damian ( Daniel Franzese ) calling out an overly-enthusiastic speaker at an anti-bullying assembly.

2 | "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

The Princess Bride (1987)

-Inigo Montoya ( Mandy Patinkin ) to Vizzini ( Wallace Shawn ) after he utters "inconceivable" one too many times.

And when you want to add to your movie collection, start with these 37 Movies Every Man Over 40 Should Be Able to Quote .

3 | "Our love is god. Let's go get a slushie."

Heathers (1988)

-JD ( Christian Slater ) to Veronica ( Winona Ryder ) after picking her up from a bad date.

4 | "These go to 11."

This is Spinal Tap (1984)

-Nigel Tufnel ( Christopher Guest ) to explaining what makes Spinal Tap's amps so special to Marty DiBergi ( Rob Reiner ).

And for more movie fun, check out The 30 Funniest Movie Lines of All Time !

5 | "This is not ‘Nam. This is bowling. There are rules."

The Big Lebowski (1998)

-Walter ( John Goodman ) to Smokey ( Jimmie Dale Gilmore ) when he steps over the line while bowling.

6 | "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here. This is the War Room!"

Dr. Strangelove, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)

-President Merkin Muffley ( Peter Sellers ) when a tussle breaks out.

7 | "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries."

Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)

-The Insulting Frenchman ( John Cleese ) to King Arthur ( Graham Chapman ) when he and his knights arrive at the castle.

8 | "There are only three ages for women in Hollywood: babe, district attorney, and Driving Miss Daisy."

The First Wives Club (1996)

-Elise ( Goldie Hawn ) to Dr. Morris Packman ( Rob Reiner ) when he denies her more fillers.

9 | "Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness."

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007)

-Jack Sparrow ( Johnny Depp ) as he escapes a hallucination in which he's surrounded by versions of himself.

10 | "I am serious. And don't call me Shirley."

Airplane (1980)

-Dr. Rumack ( Leslie Nielsen ) dismissing Ted Striker ( Robert Hays ) after he says, "Surely, you can't be serious."

11 | "There are 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses."

The Blues Brothers (1980)

-Elwood ( Dan Aykroyd ) to Jake ( John Belushi ) as they try to make it to their gig on time.

13 | "Human sacrifice! Dogs and cats living together! Mass Hysteria!"

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20 Best Movie One Liners of All Time

There are many things that make a film memorable. This can be a scene, a single shot or sometimes a dialogue that becomes a hit amongst the masses. A single line can cut across different groups of people and become part of pop culture. No one can really figure out why it happens, but there is just something about a particular line that makes it a big hit. In some cases, these one-liners are so popular that they are used to identify a movie. For example, ‘Die Hard’. And with the advent of meme culture, the legend of these dialogues is definitely growing.

The beauty of these lines is that they can be used in many different situations. So you can whip one out to surprise your friends or you can use them to process an event. There are many possibilities. So let’s have a look at the list of top most awesome one liners ever.

20. “I’m The King Of The World” – Titanic (1997)

The line became famous when it was uttered by Leonardo DiCaprio in the film. There are a couple of reasons for this. One, it expresses a feeling of achievement and it is also a great way to motivate yourself. Go ahead, say it, don’t you feel better ? The line also gained some notoriety when director James Cameron said it at the end of his speech after winning the Best Director Oscar.

19. “I’ll Have What She’s Having” – When Harry Met Sally (1989)

An example of a scene that gets elevated because of its punchline. The line said by Estelle Reiner, the mother of director Rob Reiner is the perfect way to cap a great scene. Although to be fair, credit has to be given to Meg Ryan for her very convincing performance. It is safe to say that without that ending, this scene wouldn’t have become iconic.

18. “This..Is..SPARTA” – 300 (2006)

This is a one-liner that does not possess the universal usage that other entries on this list have. What makes this awesome is just how exhilarating it is to see on screen. The moment when Gerard Butler says the line and kicks the guy in the chest, is bound to give you goosebumps. It is one of those visceral feelings that the film evokes and its popularity can be seen by the sheer number of memes that are made from it.

17. “I Like The Way You Die Boy” – Django Unchained (2012)

When it comes to crafting quotable dialogue, Quentin Tarantino is one of the best at it. And ‘Django Unchained’ is filled with them. But perhaps the most awesome and badass line of them all, would be this one. It is said by Jamie Foxx after killing someone, who deserved it. What makes it perfect is the delivery and timing of the line.

16. “I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass…and I’m all out of bubblegum” – They Live (1988)

Although this is an awesome line, what makes it memorable is just how idiosyncratic it sounds. Seriously just think about it. What an amazing way to deliver a threat. The line has added to the cult of the film and it has been parodied several times. Another great aspect of the line, you can use it in real life as well.

15. “Coffee’s For Closers Only” – Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)

It occurs during one of the most iconic cameos in film history. To be fair, all the lines Alec Baldwin utters are awesome and they set the tone for the film. This is especially remarkable because of his very limited screen time. Nonetheless he manages to leave an indelible impression. And this line that comes during that memorable scene, is the perfect way to top it off.

14. “King Kong Ain’t Got Shit On Me” – Training Day (2001)

In a performance that would fetch him an Oscar, Denzel Washington says many quotable things. This particular line of dialogue in the middle of a monologue, seems to have left the largest impression. Once again, this is something that you can use as motivation. Using this in many situations cannot be justified but at times, it really is worth saying it and for that we have Denzel to thank for.

13. “Show Me The Money” – Jerry Maguire (1996)

This is another film that is filled with memorable one-liners. But if you had to choose one among them, it would have to be this. It is contagious and when he’s saying it, you feel like screaming it out yourself. It is this aspect alone that makes it worthy of being awesome. It also works as a line that manages to encapsulate a character very well.

12. “Ever notice how you come across somebody once in a while you shouldn’t have fucked with? That’s me” – Gran Torino (2008)

Clint Eastwood’s career has reached a level where it can be used as a synonym for iconic. In his long career, he has had many one-liners that captured the people’s imagination. And this from ‘Gran Torino’ is one of his more underrated one-liners. Apart from being menacing and awesome in equal measure, it also shows that this is someone you do not want to mess with.

11. “I Dare You, I Double Dare You Motherfucker” – Pulp Fiction (1994)

If this list was about dialogue in general, this exchange would be up there with some of the very best. You could pick out quite a few lines from this exchange, but this one makes the cut. It is not only an awesome way to threaten somebody, it is also hilarious. And to Samuel L. Jackson’s credit, it doesn’t seem right when anyone else says it.

10. “60% Of The Time, It Works Everytime” – Anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgundy (2004)

Some lines become memorable because of how funny they are or how cool they sound. But sometimes the sheer absurdity of a piece of dialogue propels it to fame. ‘Anchorman’ is filled with many such lines. And this one said by Paul Rudd’s character perfectly captures the spirit of the film. It doesn’t sound funny when you listen to it the first time but it’ll surely grow on you.

9. “If You’re Good At Something, Never Do It For Free” – The Dark Knight (2008)

The demise of the great Heath Ledger robbed us of an incredible actor who left us with a few iconic roles. Chief among them being The Joker. While almost everything he says is quotable, this is an awesome and important line in the film. It shows us that not only is this guy crazy, he is actually sensible and calculating. A bonus is that we can use this in our lives as well.

8. “Yippee-ki-yay, Motherfucker” – Die Hard (1988)

When it comes to action films and action heroes, there are few who are more iconic than ‘Die Hard’ and John McClane. The line is used as a way of showing McClane’s confidence. But what is also does is to boost the confidence of the audience as well. It gives them something to cheer for and more than anything else: what a way to reply to someone when they think they’ve cornered you.

7. “I Love The Smell Of Napalm In The Morning” – Apocalypse Now (1979)

As a film that puts you right in the middle of the war zone in Vietnam, ‘Apocalypse Now’ succeeds in its intent with the harrowing visuals we get to see. But, a one-liner gives us a good understanding of the psyche of those involved in the war. Robert Duvall’s iconic line is not only cool, it also shows the man’s sheer love for war or in this case, napalm.

6. “Say Hello To My Little Friend” – Scarface (1983)

Tony Montana is one of the most badass characters we have seen on screen and it is fitting that he gets to deliver a really badass and not to mention awesome one-liner. The line has become one of the most famous quotes from a film. It is a thrilling scene that gets elevated thanks to Al Pacino’s killer (no pun intended) delivery.

5. “May The Force Be With You” – Star Wars (1977)

A line that serves many purposes. It is one of the most commonly used one-liners from a film. It can be used to motivate someone, wish them luck and so on. In fact, it because of this versatility that the line has developed a life of its own. In the film, it captures a great moment when Harrsion Ford says it and he’s finally won over by The Force.

4. “I’m Gonna Make Him An Offer He Can’t Refuse” – The Godfather (1972)

It is considered by many to be quite possibly the greatest film ever made. It certainly has some of the best dialogues in a film. The line establishes the myth that is Don Corleone. When he says it, we actually believe him. And also, it is an incredibly elegant way to word a threat. The line is so closely attached to Brando and the film that they are impossible to think of separately.

3. “You Talkin’ To Me?” – Taxi Driver (1976)

This may be one of the only times, a one-liner has made it to pop culture despite being directed at an imaginary person. Travis Bickle (Robert De Niro) speaks to the mirror as if he’s threatening somebody. What the scene and this line achieve is showing us a layer of Bickle’s personality, his loneliness etc. that make him who he is. It also has quite a chilling effect.

2. “Get Busy Living, Or Get Busy Dying” – The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Not a quote you would expect to see this high on the list but there is a good reason for its presence here. We all know how inspirational a film, ‘The Shawshank Redemption’ is. It has many great lines that we can employ in our day to day lives. But in my opinion, this one takes the cake. This is because of the sheer simplicity behind the line that gives it a deep meaning.

1. “Frankly My Dear, I Don’t Give A Damn” – Gone With The Wind (1939)

Few lines are more iconic than this and it also great importance in the history of cinema. The usage of the word “damn” led to a change in the Production Code. Looking at the line, we can sense a man who has given up on his love for a woman. And it is one of the most eloquent ways in which you can dismiss someone. For those reasons alone, this deserves to be at the top of the list.

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Talking about a movie is as much fun as watching it.

People can talk on and on about every scene and line from their favorite movie, but if you want a real challenge, try explaining your favorite movie in just one sentence.

Not so easy when you think about it, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible, Especially when you focus on it’s bad points, no matter how many of few there are.

Someone had the bright idea to give this challenge to the world and the  # ExplainaFilmPlotBadly  Twitter trend was born.

The millions of tweets with one-sentence movie plot explanations will make you laugh out loud and even give you a new perspective on the movie you never noticed before.

Take a look at 30 of the funniest movie-plot explanations people came up with.

1. The Twilight Saga

3. Harry Potter

4. Cast Away

5. Warcraft

8. Dumb And Dumber

9. The Shining

10. Independence Day

11. Lord Of The Rings

12. Ratatouille 

13. Titanic

14. The Dark Knight

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17. The Chronicles Of Narnia

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19. Friends

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21. Grease 

22. Phantom Of The Opera

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Beetlejuice Beetlejuice First Reviews: Michael Keaton’s Return as Betelgeuse is Worth the Wait

Critics say tim burton's beetlejuice beetljuice is funny, vibrant, and campy; a legacy sequel in all the right ways..

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Burton. Burton. Burton. According to the first reviews of the long-awaited sequel Beetlejuice Beetlejuice , Tim Burton is back. Critics are mostly praising this return to the sort of work that got him fans in the first place, as the Beetlejuice follow-up is being called one of the rare great legacy sequels that captures the same magic as the original. Michael Keaton slips back into the black and white suit perfectly, while the practical effects are welcomed with open arms. As for what’s new, is it any surprise that Willem Dafoe fits right in with Burton and the rest?

Here’s what critics are saying about Beetlejuice Beetlejuice :

Does it live up to the first movie?

“ Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is just as funny, vibrant, and campy and will satisfy both nostalgic audiences for the first film and those just discovering this amusing world from the creative mind of Burton for the first time.” — Ema Sasic, Next Best Picture

“Quirky, joyous, vibrantly macabre, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice managed to recreate the original’s winning mix of innocent, childlike wonder and morbidly mad imagination.” — Zhuo-Ning Su, Awards Daily

“It’s a silly little sequel to an equally silly original, and it’s hard to imagine wanting or needing much more from it.” — Siddhant Adlakha, IGN Movies

“The movie is just a lightweight riff on Beetlejuice — a piece of fan service, really. It doesn’t give you the full monster-kitsch jolt that the original film had.” — Owen Gleiberman, Variety

Is it a return to form for the director?

“Miraculously, it represents Tim Burton getting his groove back, successfully returning to the dark comedy and outrageous visuals that marked his extraordinary early work.” — Alonso Duralde, The Film Verdict

“This gleefully zany farce is one of Burton’s most enjoyable films and a welcome return to his own brand of oddball creepiness after the Disney dud that was his 2019 live-action Dumbo remake. ” — Nicholas Barber, BBC.com

“Fans of Burton will definitely not be let down…Tim Burton is back.” — Ben Rolph, Discussing Film

“I scrawled ‘Tim Burton’s back!’ in my notes.” — David Rooney, The Hollywood Reporter

“This long-gestating sequel is the most brazenly Burton-esque and bonkers Tim Burton has been in years in terms of macabre Frankenstein creatures, weird situations and off-beat humor.” — Hannah Strong, Little White Lies

“Few would mistake Beetlejuice Beetlejuice for a confessional or particularly self-revealing work, but it does hew closer to that original artistic spark that dimmed once the director became a trademark.” — Ben Croll, The Wrap

(Photo by Photo by Warner Bros. / Courtesy Everett Collection)

Does it work better than most sequels?

“As far as sequels go, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is one of the better examples of how to honor the past while bringing a story into the modern era.” — Ema Sasic, Next Best Picture

“ Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is a legacy sequel in all the right ways.” — Alexander Harrison, Screen Rant

“While the track record of sequels in general — and sequels arriving more than 30 years after the original, specifically — is spotty at best, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice defies the odds.” — Alonso Duralde, The Film Verdict

“As in Top Gun: Maverick, the long gap between the old film and the new one turns out to be beneficial. Instead of seeming like a retread, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice stands up as a comedy with its own story and its own concerns.” — Nicholas Barber, BBC.com

Is Michael Keaton still terrific in the title role?

“Michael Keaton’s return as Betelgeuse is worth the wait.” — Ben Rolph, Discussing Film

“Keaton has exhumed the role he first played in 1988 and plays him with the same energy, intelligence and devilish gusto as he did in the original all those years ago.” — Jo-Ann Tit-marsh, London Evening Standard

“Keaton is brilliant as always in a role that fits him like a glove.” — Hannah Strong, Little White Lies

“Keaton, given more of a leading role in this film compared to the first, still has the goods to bring this iconic character to life, and it’s such a treat to watch all his gags and comedic deliveries still land in his 70s.” — Ema Sasic, Next Best Picture

“Keaton occupies the role with the same off-the-wall pizazz as previously, but — how to put this — he is less annoying, more restrained, slightly melancholic (maybe).” — Sophie Monks Kaufman, In-dieWire

“Michael Keaton clearly adores this character; once again, he pours pure love into Beetlejuice’s maniacal, depraved soul.” — Stephanie Zacharek, Time Magazine

What about the other returning actors?

“Among the top-flight cast, Ryder and O’Hara excel.” — Jonathan Romney, Screen International

“Ryder goes beat for beat with Keaton as the yin of the movie to his rancidly irreverent yang. The actress transports us back to the enchanting screen persona of her late teens, not just in Beetlejuice but also in movies like Edward Scissorhands, Mermaids and Heathers, in which she radiated a singular mix of smarts, sweetness, and innocence but was just as effective when she veered into darkness.” — David Rooney, The Hollywood Reporter

“Ryder isn’t always great in comedies but her rapport with Burton probably helped shape this delightfully loose performance.” — Zhuo-Ning Su, Awards Dai-ly

Are there any standouts among the new additions?

“The addition of Willem Dafoe, who is known for his various kooky roles, is perfect for Burton’s world…Dafoe hams it up every moment he gets and draws in plenty of laughs as a result.” — Ema Sasic, Next Best Picture

“Dafoe is clearly off in his own movie, one that’s barely connected to the rest of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice …but like most of the cast, the actor is having infectious fun.” — Siddhant Adlakha, IGN Movies

“Justin Theroux is perfect for the role of Rory, and manages to make a mark despite his short screen time, delivering some of the best lines of the film.” — Serena Seghedoni, Loud and Clear Reviews

How is the script?

“The story of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is scattered all over the place. The script…focuses on one too many characters.” — Ben Rolph, Discussing Film

“Screenwriters Alfred Gough and Miles Millar cannily stitch together a framework that is more narratively intricate than the first film. They interweave several plot strands to crafty but often confusing effect.” — Jonathan Romney, Screen International

“The script spends so much time introducing new characters and plot-threads that it gets a bit tangled in the narrative cobwebs.” — John Nugent, Emnpire Magazine

“It’s just a pity that the storytelling sprawls all over the place, with some plotlines (like the Beetlejuice/Delores discord) failing to pay off.” — James Mottram, Total Film

Are there a lot of nostalgic nods to the original?

“There are plenty of callbacks to the original, but Burton allows this one to stand apart with new drama in this world and beyond.” — Ema Sasic, Next Best Picture

“The closest the film gets to any egregious level of nostalgia bait (other than its very unnecessary existence) is in its third act, where it tries too hard to replicate the iconic possession scene.” — Connor Lightbody, Movies We Texted About

“A lot depends on the viewer recognising recurring elements from 1988.” — Jonathan Romney, Screen International

Does it ever feel unnecessary?

“At no point does the 36-years-later revival tout itself as capital-I ‘Important’…it’s fine – at times, it’s even charming – and it doesn’t need to be much more than that.” — Siddhant Adlakha, IGN Movies

“There’s good fan service and bad, and as stilted and gimcracky as it can sometimes be, I had a pretty good time at Beetlejuice Beetlejuice .” — Owen Gleiberman, Variety

How Does it look?

“There’s lots to feast on visually…the comic-gory special effects are also memorable.” — James Mottram, Total Film

“The film’s most laudable achievement is its boisterous way of reclaiming highly tactile practical and animatronic effects for the CGI age.” — Jonathan Romney, Screen International

“Burton both recaptures and expands beyond the aesthetic of the original, mix-ing the macabre and the cartoonish, and running the gamut from stop-motion animation to the most sophisticated CGI.” — Alonso Duralde, The Film Verdict

“There is an abundance of practical effects, with the caveat that some CGI effects (namely a cringe-worthy scene with some influencers) are not as graceful and tactile.” — Connor Lightbody, Movies We Texted About

Will it make us laugh?

“ Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is funny, all the time.” — Stephanie Bunbury, Deadline Hollywood Daily

“The nicest surprise is that Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is that rare thing, a big-budget comedy which is actually funny.” — Nicholas Barber, BBC.com

“The priority is to cram in as many grisly comic riffs as possible, from visual puns on phrases like ‘inner child’ and ’spill your guts’ to a relishable digression on Betelgeuse’s romance with Dolores.” — Jonathan Romney, Screen International

“ Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is filled with low-stakes wisecracks and kindergarten-style one-liners, but the effect works.” — Stephanie Zacharek, Time Magazine

Is it for kids?

“ Beetlejuice Beetlejuice [is] an ideal gateway to the horror genre for younger viewers.” — Siddhant Adlakha, IGN Movies

“The original script for Beetlejuice was deemed too dark and was lightened in tone, while this seems to have experienced similar sanitation as an F-bomb is covered by a very sharp and very unneeded bleep.” — Connor Lightbody, Movies We Texted About

Are there any complaints?

“Monica Bellucci’s role is wasted.” — Ema Sasic, Next Best Picture

“ Beetlejuice Beetlejuice could use more Delores: she pops up, elegantly, only here and there.” — Stephanie Zacharek, Time Maga-zine

“The film’s only flaw is that it has a couple of plotlines too many, which give it a drawn-out middle and a rushed and jumbled finale: as in the original Beetlejuice , it could have done with spending more time with Betelgeuse.” — Nicholas Barber, BBC.com

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The Most Scathing (But Also Kinda Funny) Movie Reviews From Critics

Whether they specialize in summarizing and rating the latest Hollywood flicks or older classic films, moviegoers value the assessments critics provide online and in print. Good critics often spend years studying the film industry and journalism to contribute fair and unbiased evaluations for their readers, and audiences rely on their opinions when deciding to commit time and money to a film.

As honest and reliable sources in the entertainment industry, reviewers often expose the flaws and shortcomings of the movies they rate. While readers expect to get honest and sometimes unflattering film reviews from their trusted sources, they often assume critics will remain professional and courteous with their words. However, now and then, a critic will hate a particular film so much that they feel obligated to voice their unfiltered opinion. Although their most likely intent is to provide a seriously harsh analysis, the scathing reviews from these critics often come off to readers as quite comical. 

This list features 22 such instances of funny movie reviews from critics who despised the films they critiqued. Some aren't that surprising, as the movies did not go over so well with general audiences, either. (Yet they are still, ultimately, hilarious.) However, some of the featured films won numerous awards , becoming instant classics in the hearts of fans and seemingly every other critic who watched them. 

Vote up the most brutally insulting reviews from film critics that also made you laugh. 

Roger Ebert Likened Watching ‘Battlefield Earth’ To Taking A Bus With Someone Who Doesn’t Bathe

Giving the 2000 film only half a star, Roger Ebert thought sitting through Battlefield Earth was about as enjoyable as sitting next to someone who stinks for a few hours in a tight, enclosed space: 

Battlefield Earth is like taking a bus trip with someone who has needed a bath for a long time. It's not merely bad; it's unpleasant in a hostile way. The visuals are grubby and drab. The characters are unkempt and have rotten teeth. Breathing tubes hang from their noses like ropes of snot. The soundtrack sounds like the boom mike is being slammed against the inside of a 55-gallon drum… Hiring Travolta and Whitaker was a waste of money, since we can't recognize them behind pounds of matted hair and gnarly makeup. Their costumes look like they were purchased from the Goodwill store on the planet Tatooine… The Psychlos can fly between galaxies, but look at their nails: Their civilization has mastered the hyperdrive but not the manicure… Some movies run off the rails. This one is like the train crash in The Fugitive . I watched it in mounting gloom, realizing I was witnessing something historic, a film that for decades to come will be the punch line of jokes about bad movies. There is a moment here when the Psychlos' entire planet (home office and all) is blown to smithereens, without the slightest impact on any member of the audience (or, for that matter, the cast). If the film had been destroyed in a similar cataclysm, there might have been a standing ovation.

• Vertical Entertainment

'New York Post' Reviewer Johnny Oleksinski Would Rather Wake Up Beside A Severed Horse Head Than Watch ‘Gotti’ Again

In a reference to The Godfather, the film that spawned the modern mob movie, reviewer Johnny Oleksinski claimed he would choose being threatened with an animal carcass in his bed over sitting through Gotti for a second time:

I’d rather wake up next to a severed horse head than ever watch Gotti again. The worst movie of the year so far, the long-awaited biopic about the Gambino crime boss’ rise from made man to top dog took four directors, 44 producers and eight years to make.  It shows. The finished product belongs in a cement bucket at the bottom of the river… Travolta, who’s made a career out of Italian stereotypes, obviously thought the Dapper Don would be his Don Corleone. It’s his Chef Boy­ardee. His performance is a leather-faced freak show. And the plot is nonsensical… [It] is an excuse for ­Travolta to shmact and for his wife, Kelly Preston - playing Gotti’s wife, Victoria - to howl like Medea… It’s the worst mob movie ever, but I see a bright future in midnight showings. “The Gotti Horror Picture Show.”

• Universal Pictures

Gene Siskel Wanted The Lead To Get Eaten In ‘Jaws: The Revenge’

Chicago Tribune critic Gene Siskel thought Lorraine Gary's performance tanked 1987's Jaws: The Revenge : 

So, we need a good villain that everyone is afraid of [to carry a storyline]. Right, a great white shark. That solves the problem with the recent Jaws films in that lately the big fish has been eating nobodies. Remember Robert Shaw's old fisherman in the original Jaws ? Remember the police chief Scheider and the ichthyologist played by Richard Dreyfuss? Now those were three somebodies. We didn't want them to die. But in the just-released Jaws: The Revenge the shark's main course is intended to be Roy Scheider's widow, Ellen Brody, a frumpy middle-aged woman played by boring actress Lorraine Gary, who happens to be married to the president of MCA Universal, which finances the Jaws films and which explains her lead role. Let's put it this way: when you see and hear the nasal Lorraine Gary on screen you want the shark to eat her…

The film critic also commended a previous actor for refusing to act in the picture:

Roy Scheider wisely departed the Jaws films, having cashed enough paychecks without losing his self-respect.

• Columbia Pictures

Roger Ebert ‘Hated Hated Hated Hated Hated’ Rob Reiner’s ‘North’

One descriptive “hate” just wouldn't suffice for Roger Ebert as he voiced his distaste for the 1994 film, North :

I have no idea why Rob Reiner, or anyone else, wanted to make this story into a movie, and close examination of the film itself is no help. North is one of the most unpleasant, contrived, artificial, cloying experiences I've had at the movies. To call it manipulative would be inaccurate; it has an ambition to manipulate, but fails. The film stars Elijah Wood, who is a wonderful young actor… Here he is stuck in a story that no actor, however wonderful, however young, should be punished with….. What is the point of the scenes with the auditioning parents? (The victimized actors range from Dan Aykroyd as a Texan to Kathy Bates as an Eskimo). They are all seen as broad, desperate comic caricatures. They are not funny. They are not touching. There is no truth in them. They don't even work as parodies. There is an idiocy here that seems almost intentional, as if the filmmakers plotted to leave anything of interest or entertainment value out of these episodes… I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it.

The hate-heavy line from the review became so famous, Ebert's book collection of bad reviews is titled after it.

• Sony Pictures Releasing

According To Christy Lemire, Even Bennifer Couldn’t Save ‘Gigli’ From Its Terrible Dialogue

Film reviewer Christy Lemire argued that Gigli was “unwatchable,” despite featuring Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck in the leading roles: 

Gigli - which spawned the phenomenon the gossip pages and celebrity magazines so lovingly refer to as “Bennifer” - is every bit as unwatchable as the deafening negative chatter would suggest… Even making a little game of it, and trying to pinpoint the exact moment when Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez fell in love, stops being fun after a while… Perhaps it's when he says, in an attempt to seduce her, "I'm the bull, you're the cow." Or when she beckons him into foreplay by lying back in bed and purring, “Gobble, gobble” - which could forever change the way you view your Thanksgiving turkey… If this were a movie starring two B-list actors, or two complete unknowns, it probably would have gone straight to video. After curious masochists and J.Lo fans check it out the first weekend, Gigli probably will have a drop-off in audience that rivals The Hulk - 70 percent - then go to video…  Cameos from Pacino, Christopher Walken as a detective and Lainie Kazan as Gigli's mother don't help, either. Did they owe someone a favor? What are they doing here? Pacino won his one and only Oscar with Brest, [the director and producer of the film], for 1992's Scent of a Woman , but couldn't he have just thanked the director instead?

• 20th Century Fox

Roger Ebert Had A Lot To Say About The ‘Vomitorium’ That Was ‘Freddy Got Fingered’

Esteemed Chicago Sun-Times critic Roger Ebert thought Tom Green should consider bringing rocks into the theater to throw at the audience in case they assaulted him for making such a horrible film:

This movie doesn't scrape the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't below the bottom of the barrel. This movie doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence with barrels. Many years ago, when surrealism was new, Luis Bunuel and Salvador Dali made Un Chien Andalou, a film so shocking that Bunuel filled his pockets with stones to throw at the audience if it attacked him. Green, whose film is in the surrealist tradition, may want to consider the same tactic. The day may come when Freddy Got Fingered is seen as a milestone of neo-surrealism. The day may never come when it is seen as funny. The film is a vomitorium consisting of 93 minutes of Tom Green doing things that a geek in a carnival sideshow would turn down.

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30 Best One Liners in Horror Movies

Joshua Millican May 16, 2016 Lists Comments Off on 30 Best One Liners in Horror Movies

Below are some of the most instantly recognizable single lines of dialog from the pantheon of horror movies. Hardcore fans will have no trouble identifying the films attached to the following quotes, but you can make a game out of it by quizzing your friends. Have fun!

“ Welcome to Prime Time, bitch! ” Spoken by Freddy Krueger (Robert Englund) in A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987) Context : Jenny had Hollywood aspirations before getting locked up in Westin Hospital for self-destructive tendencies. Leave it to Freddy to deliver her first big “break” into television.

“ Get away from her you bitch! ” Spoken by Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) in Aliens (1986) Context : After rescuing Newt from a swarm of xenomorphs and escaping the abandoned facility moments before it went nuclear, Ripley’s especially pissed when Queen Alien surprises them on the Sulaco.

“ We’ll tear your soul apart .” Spoken by Pinhead (Doug Bradley) in Hellraiser (1987) Context : After Kristy Cotton strikes a deal with the Cenobites, one that will save her from an eternity of suffering, Pinhead reminds her of the consequences should she fail to deliver.

“ Here’s Johnny! ” Spoken by Jack Torrance (Jack Nicholson) in The Shining (1980) Context : Jack Torrance’s utterance is terrifying and hilarious in retrospect, delivered at the peak of his axe-wielding depravity.

“ Sometimes, dead is better .” Spoken by Jud Crandall (Fred Gwynne) in Pet Sematary (1989) Context : Jud knows Louis Creed is so devastated by the death of his son, he’s thinking about burying him on the resurrecting soil deep in the woods—but the land is sour.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGQr5hCpzr8

“ There here .” Spoken by Carol Anne Freeling (Heather O’Rourke) in Poltergeist (1982) Context : Carol Anne has just made first contact with the “TV People”. After the house is shaken by a supernatural force, she introduces them to her family.

“ I ate his liver with fava beans and a nice Chianti .” Spoken by Dr. Hannibal Lecter (Anthony Hopkins) in The Silence of the Lambs (1991) Context : Hannibal tells Agent Starling what happened to the last guy who tried to psychoanalyze him!

“ Be afraid, be very afraid .” Spoken by Veronica Quaife (Geena Davis) in The Fly (1986) Context : Veronica absolutely disagrees with Seth Brundle’s declaration that his tele-pods are so safe, there’s absolutely nothing to be afraid of.

“ I see dead people ” Spoken by Cole Sear (Haley Joel Osment) in The Sixth Sense (1999) Context : Dr. Malcolm Crowe just had a major breakthrough with his patient by getting Cole to verbalize the source of his fears.

“ You’re going to need a bigger boat .” Spoken by Brody (Roy Scheider) in Jaws (1975) Context : Brody just got his first look at the shark; his response it quite the understatement.

“ The power of Christ compels you! ” Spoken by Father Merrin (Max von Sydow) and Father Karras (Jason Miller) in The Exorcist (1973) Context : It was a good day for an exorcism. By chanting in unison, the Fathers seemed to have mean old Captain Howdy on the ropes in an epic confrontation.

“ We all go a little mad sometimes .” Spoken by Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins) in Psycho (1960) Context : Norman explains to Marion Crane why he won’t have his mother institutionalized. He’s such a good boy.

“ They’re all gonna laugh at you! ” Spoken by Margaret White (Piper Laurie) in Carrie (1976) Context : In her bid for Mother of the Year, Margaret gives her daughter yet another reason why she shouldn’t go to the prom. These words echo through Carrie’s mind when she snaps, unleashing a telekinetic fury.

“ What’s your favorite scary movie? ” Spoken by Ghostface (Roger L. Jackson) in Scream (1996) Context : Leave it to Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson to turn a seemingly innocuous question into a deadly threat. Too bad poor Casey wasn’t up on her horror trivia.

“ Death by stereo! ” Spoken by Sam (Corey Haim) in The Lost Boys (1987) Context : Sam and the Frog Brothers have started turning the tables on a gang of vampires attacking Grampa’s house. He just shot one through the heart with an arrow, into a vintage sound system—with explosive results.

“ This is my Boomstick! ” Spoken by Ash (Bruce Campbell) in Army of Darkness (1992) Context : After traveling through time, Ash uses his shotgun to appoint himself Alpha Dog of a mediaeval community.

“ We all float down here .” Spoken by Pennywise (Tim Curry) in It (1990) Context : Pennywise knows how much Georgie loves balloons, using the tot’s weakness to lure him down into the sewers.

“ I want to play a game .” Spoken by Jigsaw/John Kramer (Tobin Bell) in Saw (2004) Context : When the tricycle riding ventriloquist’s dummy named Billy delivers this message on his master’s behalf, don’t expect fun to follow. The details change but the game is always the same; it’s called: How Bad do you Want to Live?

“ He’s got his father’s eyes .” Spoken by Roman Castevet (Sidney Blackmer) in Rosemary’s Baby (1968) Context : Rosemary has just seen her child for the first time, and the look of utter shock on her face is as iconic as Roman’s quote.

“ When there is no room left in hell, the dead will walk the earth .” Spoken by Peter (Ken Foree) in Dawn of the Dead (1978) Context : Peter reminisces on something his voodoo-practicing grandfather once told him. It’s as good a theory as any for a zombie apocalypse.

“ They’re coming to get you, Barbara .” Spoken by Johnny Blair (Russell Streiner) in Night of the Living Dead (1968) Context : Karma’s a bitch, Johnny! That’s what you get for teasing your sister.

“ We’ve traced the call… it’s coming from inside the house .” Spoken by Sgt. Sacker (Bill Boyett) in When a Stranger Calls (1979) Context : After a night of harassing phone calls, babysitter Jill Johnson gets the worst news possible.

“ Every 23rd spring for 23 days it gets to eat .” Spoken by Jezelle Gay Hartman (Patricia Belcher) in Jeepers Creepers (2001) Context : Eccentric psychic Jezelle may indeed have a few screws loose, but her brief summation of The Creeper’s mythology is extremely chilling.

“ Welcome to Fright Night… for real .” Spoken by Jerry Dandrige (Chris Sarandon) in Fright Night (1985) Context : When Charley Brewster and Peter Vincent attempt to rescue Amy Peterson, vampire Jerry Dandrige reminds them that this isn’t a TV show.

“ It takes all kinds of critters to make Farmer Vincent’s fritters .” Spoken by Vincent Smith (Rory Calhoun) in Motel Hell (1980) Context : The secret ingredient is people!

“ Brains! ” Spoken by Tarman (Allan Trautman) in Return of the Living Dead (1985) Context : Return of the Living Dead is the first film to postulate that zombies enjoy eating brains best!

“ Outlander! ” Spoken by Malachai (Courtney Gains) in Children of the Corn (1984) Context : He may play second fiddle to child prophet Isaac, but Malachai is one scary ginger motherfucker!

“ Get out! ” Spoken by an invisible malevolent entity in The Amityville Horror (1979) Context : It just took 2 words to send Father Delaney fleeing from the house in abject terror.

“ Groovy! ” Spoken by Ash (Bruce Campbell) in Evil Dead II (1987) Context : Ash likes his new chainsaw-hand!

“ Pancakes! ” Spoken by Dennis (Matthew Helms) in Cabin Fever (2002) Context : Dennis’s nonsequitur  is followed by an impressive display of karate skills. The 2016 Cabin Fever remake sheds light on the origins of this statement.

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Tags a nightmare on elm street aliens Army of Darkness cabin fever Carrie children of the corn Dawn of the Dead Evil Dead II Fright Night Hellraiser Horror Movie Quotes It Jaws Jeepers Creepers Motel Hell Night of the Living Dead Pet Sematary Poltergeist psycho Return of the Living Dead Rosemary’s Baby saw scream The Amityville Horror The Exorcist the fly The Los Boys the shining the silence of the lambs the sixth sense When a Stranger Calls

About Joshua Millican

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105 One-Liners That Prove You Don't Need Many Words To Make Someone Laugh

You don't need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.

BuzzFeed Staff

It's always a good idea to have a solid joke on hand. You never know when you'll need to cheer someone up, break the tension in an awkward situation, or convince people that you're funny. And if the person who needs cheering up is you, well, they say laughter is the best medicine.

Whatever you need them for, here's a nice, long list of jokes for you to enjoy. They're all one-liners, so you won't have to wait forever to get to the punchline (you're welcome). Best of all, there's a little bit of everything: clever jokes, corny jokes, dad jokes, you name it.

1. i’m afraid of elevators, so i take steps to avoid them..

2. I was addicted to the hokey pokey, but then I turned myself around.

3. what’s the difference between an outlaw and an in-law outlaws are wanted., 4. did you hear they arrested the devil yeah, they got him on possession., 5. why aren’t dogs good dancers because they have two left feet..

6. A bossy man walked into a bar. Then ordered everyone a round.

7. if athletes get athlete’s foot, what do astronauts get missile toe., 8. why shouldn’t you trust atoms they make up everything., 9. what do you call a bear with no teeth a gummy bear..

10. If Whole Foods sells sliced apples, is it false advertising?

— u/cockneybastard

11. Where does a winemaker get his gossip? Through the grapevine.

12. if you arrest a mime, do you have to tell him he has the right to remain silent, 13. you can't plant flowers if you haven't botany..

— @punstars

14. I went to buy some camo pants, but I couldn’t find any.

15. did you hear the one about the claustrophobic astronaut he just wanted a little more space., 16. conscience: the small voice that makes you feel smaller., 17. my iq test results came back. they were negative..

18. I'm not a hard drinker. I actually find it quite easy.

19. the trouble with getting to work on time is that it makes the day so long., 20. you shouldn't marry a calendar because its days are numbered., 21. why don’t pirates take a shower before they walk the plank they just wash up on shore..

22. I used to believe that all things must pass—until I got stuck behind a school bus.

23. what do you get when you combine a rhetorical question and a joke.

— u/mayor123asdf

24. How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing, it was on the house.

25. it was an emotional wedding. even the cake was in tiers..

26. The reason some politicians like to stand on their record is to keep voters from examining it.

27. did you hear about the circus fire it was in tents..

—Mark Dunn, Facebook

28. I spent a lot of time, money and effort childproofing my house … but the kids still get in.

29. our child has a great deal of willpower—and even more won’t power..

30. I wanted to make a joke about leeches, but it sucked.

— @IncredibleCulk

31. My mother was so surprised when I told her I was born again. She said she didn’t feel a thing!

32. you can’t believe everything you hear—but you can repeat it., 33. what do you get when you cross a polar bear with a seal a polar bear..

34. They’ve been treating me like one of the family, and I’ve put up with it for as long as I can.

35. one of the oddities of wall street is that the dealer, not the customer, is the broker., 36. what do you call a hippie’s wife mississippi., 37. the issue with dating tennis players is that once they've scored, it's not love anymore..

38. Three guys walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

— u/Photon_Torpedophile

39. There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count and those who can't.

40. there was a heated debate about theft at the restaurant, so i decided not to take sides., 41. i love my furniture. my recliner and i go way back..

— u/akaShadezz11

42. The difference between an old bus station and a lobster with breast implants is one's a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.

— hobbitgirl96

43. My friends keep pressuring me to go spelunking, so I finally caved.

44. a man walked into his house and was delighted when he discovered that someone had stolen all of his lamps., 45. my friend asked me to help him round up his 37 sheep. i said, "40.".

46. A girl walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre, so he gave it to her.

47. there are two types of people in the world: those who can extrapolate from incomplete data., 48. i'll never forget my grandfather's last word to me before he kicked the bucket. he looked me in the eyes and said, "son, how far do you think i can kick this bucket", 49. i have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo..

50. Without a doubt, my favorite Robin Williams movie is Mrs. Fire.

— u/Metalingus03

51. My friend gave me his EpiPen as he was dying. It seemed very important to him that I have it.

52. you don't need a parachute to go skydiving. you need a parachute to go skydiving twice., 53. polite tennis players give each other backhanded compliments., 54. i'd never let my children watch the orchestra because there's too much sax and violins..

— u/theDwarfed

55. I, for one, like Roman numerals.

56. working in a mirror factory is something i can totally see myself doing., 57. i saw a sign that said, "watch for children," and i thought, that sounds like a fair trade., 58. i entered 10 puns in a pun contest, hoping one would win, but no pun in ten did., 59. i recently started a band called "1023 megabytes." we haven't gotten a gig yet., 60. what's the difference between a well-dressed man on a bike and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle attire., 61. my favorite time on the clock is 6:30, hands down..

— u/imabadassinmymind

62. I just bought these shoes from my drug dealer. Don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.

63. my son told me he didn't understand cloning and i told him, "that makes two of us.".

— u/26326312

64. I refused to believe my roadworker father was stealing from his job, but when I got home, all the signs were there.

65. it's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally., 66. what if soy milk were just regular milk introducing itself in spanish, 67. i accidentally swallowed some scrabble tiles. my next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster., 68. of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry-erase board has to be the most remarkable..

— u/Foreverxtrue24

69. A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket and thinks, Some asshole has my pen .

70. the average person is really mean..

— u/o0oo00oo0o

71. What has five toes but isn't your foot? My foot.

— u/D3V1L420

72. They all laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian; well, they're not laughing now.

73. i haven’t slept for 10 days because that would be too long., 74. this morning i was staring at my naked body in the mirror and thought, i'm gonna get kicked out of this ikea pretty soon ., 75. i tried to start a beekeeping business, but it didn't generate any buzz., 76. shoutout to anyone wondering what the opposite of in is., 77. there's no "i" in denial., 78. i have an inferiority complex, but it's not a very good one., 79. people say i'm condescending. that means i talk down to people., 80. who is this rorschach guy, and why did he paint so many pictures of my parents fighting, 81. there's a fine line between hyphenated words., 82. i asked the gym instructor if he could teach me to do the splits. he replied, "how flexible are you" i said, "i can't make it on fridays.", 83. i organized a threesome last night. there were a couple of no-shows, but i still had fun., 84. how many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb only two. the hard part is getting them into the light bulb., 85. i was addicted to soap, but i'm clean now., 86. a senior citizen called her husband during his drive home: "herman, i just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on interstate 90, please be careful" herman said, "it's not just one car. there's hundreds of them", 87. exaggerations went up 1,000,000% last year., 88. a magician was going down the road and turned into a driveway..., 89. the difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is heavy and the other is a little lighter., 90. i got caught taking a pee in the local swimming pool. the lifeguard yelled at me so loud, i nearly fell in., 91. when my toothpaste dropped to the ground, i was crestfallen., 92. i was so surprised when the stationery store moved., 93. on the other hand, you have different fingers., 94. parallel lines have so much in common, but it’s a shame they’ll never meet., 95. i sympathize with batteries. i’m never included in anything either..

— u/jhabibs

96. Two guys walk into a bar; the third one ducks.

—Kevin Kohr, Facebook

97. I hate Russian dolls; they're so full of themselves.

98. Apparently, you can’t use “beefstew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.

— u/TheAmericanWay1597

99. I like the name Brie, but it's a little cheesy.

100. the baby knew she was ready to be born because she was running out of womb., 101. velcro, what a rip-off, 102. i lost 25% of my roof last night...oof..

— u/apgp123

103. I asked my dad for his best dad joke and he said, "You."

104. i used to have a job at a calendar factory, but i got the sack because i took a couple of days off..

—A.J. Dunleavy, Facebook

105. This is my stepladder. I never knew my real ladder.

This post contains content written by Erin Chack and Tanner Greenring. It was compiled by Evelina Medina. 

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Where Kamala Harris Stands on the Issues: Abortion, Immigration and More

She wants to protect the right to abortion nationally. Here’s what else to know about her positions.

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By Maggie Astor

• Published July 21, 2024 Updated Aug. 24, 2024

With Vice President Kamala Harris having replaced President Biden on the Democratic ticket, her stances on key issues will be scrutinized by both parties and the nation’s voters.

She has a long record in politics: as district attorney of San Francisco, as attorney general of California, as a senator, as a presidential candidate and as vice president.

Here is an overview of where she stands.

Ms. Harris supports legislation that would protect the right to abortion nationally, as Roe v. Wade did before it was overturned in 2022, in Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization.

After the Dobbs ruling, she became central to the Biden campaign’s efforts to keep the spotlight on abortion, given that Mr. Biden — with his personal discomfort with abortion and his support for restrictions earlier in his career — was a flawed messenger. In March, she made what was believed to be the first official visit to an abortion clinic by a president or vice president.

She consistently supported abortion rights during her time in the Senate, including cosponsoring legislation that would have banned common state-level restrictions, like requiring doctors to perform specific tests or have hospital admitting privileges in order to provide abortions.

As a presidential candidate in 2019, she argued that states with a history of restricting abortion rights in violation of Roe should be subject to what is known as pre-clearance for new abortion laws — those laws would have to be federally approved before they could take effect. That proposal is not viable now that the Supreme Court has overturned Roe.

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