how to write an essay about why you deserve something

• Applying For Scholarships

Why I Deserve This Scholarship Essay Examples 2023

Jennifer Finetti Aug 3, 2022

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One of the most popular scholarship essay questions is “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” Answering such a question can be difficult because you don’t want to sound too needy or greedy. Your essay must stand out from the competition while still being humble and appreciative. Check out these essay writing tips, along with a scholarship essay sample about why I deserve the scholarship.

Tips for writing a “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” essay

Your essay will be unique to your experiences, but there are some general guidelines you should follow. Here are tips for writing a “why I’m deserving scholarship” essay:

• Explain how the scholarship money would contribute to your long-term goals. You’re asking the scholarship committee to invest in your future. They want to ensure their investment goes to a worthy cause. Explain how your education will play a role in your career and overall goals after graduation.
• Focus on the purpose of the scholarship. While writing your essay, keep in mind what the scholarship is for and where it comes from. Tailor your response to the scholarship so it resonates with the review committee.
• Don’t be afraid to promote yourself. This may be your only chance to tell the committee about your achievements. Showing your past success will instill confidence about your future success.
• Use a thesis statement, just like you would with any other essay. You should refer back to the thesis throughout the essay and tie it into the conclusion. If you have trouble creating the thesis at the beginning, write the rest of the essay first. Read through, see what stands out the most, and then write an intro with a cohesive thesis.
• When explaining obstacles in your life, focus on how you overcame them. Show that you’re a problem solver, able to persevere through any situation. You can mention difficulties from your past, but turn the attention to what you did as a result of them.
• Avoid generalizations. Generic statements like “I deserve this because I am a hard worker” aren’t enough. Every applicant is a hard worker, has ‘good grades,’ etc. What makes you different, special and memorable? That should be the topic of your scholarship essay.
• Support your statements with examples. Instead of saying, “I’m a hard worker,” say, “I upheld two jobs while I was in high school to support my family, and I still maintained a 3.75 GPA.” This is no longer a generalization. It is an achievement specific to your life and upbringing.
• Use positive language. Phrases like ‘well-prepared,’ ‘qualified candidate’ and ‘specialized training’ showcase achievements in a positive light. Even in a negative situation, show the positive way you got through it.
• Avoid words like ‘very’ and ‘really.’ You can typically find a one-word substitute that sounds more professional. Very hard turns into difficult. Very good becomes exceptional. Here is an excellent guide for modifiers that replace very .
• Take a one-day break before you edit. Once you have a solid draft written, do not jump straight into editing. Wait a day before looking over your essay. This will let you read the essay with fresh eyes so you can catch inconsistencies, grammar mistakes, and more.

Example 1: Why I deserve this scholarship essay (100 words)

With a 100 word scholarship essay, you need to jump into the thesis as quickly as possible. There is not enough space for a lengthy introduction. Use concise language, and showcase your biggest achievements/goals. You should have enough sentences to break into two small paragraphs, though one may only be two to three sentences.

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I believe I deserve this scholarship because I am an innovative problem solver. As the student council president, I helped re-organize my school library to better accommodate students’ needs. I worked with staff to categorize books to better reflect current school subjects.  I will use the same leadership mindset to obtain my business degree with a focus on project management. My goal is to work in construction management to increase efficiency in low-income housing development. With this scholarship and the need-based grants I will receive, I can complete my education and continue to solve problems within my community.

Word Count: 98

Example 2: Why I deserve this scholarship essay (250 words)

A 250-word scholarship essay usually consists of 4-5 paragraphs. The introduction can have a short lead-in, but it should arrive at the thesis quickly. The body paragraphs should support the assertion made in the first paragraph (the reason you deserve the scholarship). The conclusion should summarize the essay collectively, and it may include a statement of appreciation.

One of the most debated topics in America is how to provide affordable healthcare to the masses. I believe the answer lies in accessible healthcare providers. Nurse practitioners often go unappreciated and unrecognized for their versatility and value in the medical profession. With this scholarship, I could continue my training to become a nurse practitioner and provide attainable medical services to underserved communities. Growing up in a small Montana farming town, the closest hospital was 45 minutes away. The only local family doctor charged whatever he wanted because he was the sole provider. My parents relied on home remedies to treat any ailment my brother and I developed. This is when my passion for medicine first took form. Minimal medical care was not a concern until my father went to the hospital for severe stomach problems. These were the result of Crohn’s disease, a condition that can be managed with treatment. Because my father had not been to the doctor in years, the flare up was highly aggressive. It took months to get it under control and get him on preventative medication. I decided to go to college to help people like my father. As a nurse practitioner I can practice medicine without charging a fortune for my services. I plan to serve in rural communities where hospitals and doctors are limited or non-existent. I am grateful to be considered for this scholarship opportunity, and should I be selected, I will use it to advance my medical education.

Word Count: 248

Example 3: Why I deserve this scholarship essay (500 words)

With a 500-word scholarship essay, you have room to tell your story and create an experience for the reader. Use several introductory sentences to lead into your thesis and set the tone for the essay. The body paragraph should flow in a logical manner, most often chronologically. Then the conclusion should re-emphasize the thesis and leave the scholarship committee with something to remember.

Winston Churchill once said, “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” And while I never define my obstacles as ‘failures,’ I mark my success by my repeated perseverance through adversity. I have faced several challenges over the years, from dyslexia to homelessness; yet I continued to earn exemplary grades and graduate at the top of my class. I deserve this scholarship because I have the strength and determination to achieve my goals, no matter what hurdles I have to overcome. I was not born a gifted student. Testing and assignments were always difficult for me, whether I studied or not. In second grade, my parents had me tested for learning disabilities. The psychologist said that I had a hyperactivity disorder and prescribed medication to suppress my energy. After two years abiding by that treatment, I was re-evaluated and diagnosed with dyslexia. This helped me get the treatment I needed, and I finally made progress in school. Shortly after I learned how to study with dyslexia, my father lost his job. He was the sole breadwinner for the household, and I was soon on the street with my mother and two younger siblings. I got a job in newspaper delivery, one of the few fields that will hire a 12-year-old. My father found odd jobs to bring money to the family, and together we were eventually able to pay for a two-bedroom apartment to live in. I was valedictorian that school year, and I maintained a perfect attendance record. Like my father, I knew I had to do whatever was necessary to succeed and thrive. In high school, I developed an interest for psychology. I noticed patterns in behaviors, both in myself and in the people around me. I asked my child therapist, the one who officially diagnosed me with dyslexia, if I could work at his clinic over the summers. He allowed me to intern at his counseling center my junior and senior year, and I gained valuable insight into the business side of psychology. I am now entering the second year of my psychology degree. I plan to complete my bachelor’s degree and earn a Doctorate of Neuropsychology in the years that follow. My focus is on psychological testing, specifically for children with autism or learning disabilities. I spent years struggling in school because of a preventable misdiagnosis.  I want to ensure that other children do not face the same struggles in their future. Why do I deserve this scholarship? Because I have the passion and determination to become a trusted member of the psychological community. With my education, I can help children get the treatment they need at an early age, giving the best chance at finding their own success. You’re not just helping me get through college. You’re improving the quality of life for countless families to come. I appreciate your consideration, and I look forward to building a lasting relationship with your organization.

Word Count: 492

You Should Also Read…

How to Write a Scholarship Motivation Letter

Why Are You Applying to This Scholarship Essay (with Example)

How to Write a Scholarship Essay Introduction (With Example)

How to End a Scholarship Essay

How to Write a Great 250-Word Essay

How to Write a Great 500 Word Essay

5 People Who Should Review Your Scholarship Essays

• Scholarship Essay

Jennifer Finetti

As a parent who recently helped her own kids embark on their college journeys, Jennifer approaches the transition from high school to college from a unique perspective. She truly enjoys engaging with students – helping them to build the confidence, knowledge, and insight needed to pursue their educational and career goals, while also empowering them with the strategies and skills needed to access scholarships and financial aid that can help limit college costs. She understands the importance of ensuring access to the edtech tools and resources that can make this process easier and more equitable - this drive to support underserved populations is what drew her to ScholarshipOwl. Jennifer has coached students from around the world, as well as in-person with local students in her own community. Her areas of focus include career exploration, major selection, college search and selection, college application assistance, financial aid and scholarship consultation, essay review and feedback, and more. She works with students who are at the top of their class, as well as those who are struggling. She firmly believes that all students, regardless of their circumstances, can succeed if they stay focused and work hard in school. Jennifer earned her MA in Counseling Psychology from National University, and her BA in Psychology from University of California, Santa Cruz.

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How to answer “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” essay prompt (with examples!)

When you’re applying for scholarships, you’ll see tons of different essay prompts. Two of the most common are “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” or its variant “Why are you applying for this scholarship?” While these might seem like intimidating questions, don’t overthink them! These are straightforward questions that you can easily answer. Here’s how.

What’s the scholarship committee looking for?

Tips to consider.

• Examples of “Why I Deserve It” scholarship essays

Variant: “Why are you applying for this scholarship?”

Variant: “why do you need this scholarship”, ready to start answering an essay prompt like this.

Scholarship providers want to give the award to the most deserving student. So by including these prompts, they’re basically asking: Why should it be you?

In particular, they want to know:

• What makes you unique? What are your particular interests and motivations?
• How do your strengths and goals fit in with this particular scholarship? For instance, why you might deserve an athletic scholarship might be different from why you deserve a financial need scholarship . 
• How will you make use of the scholarship funds? Scholarship providers want to know their awards will make a difference. Show them how this money would really help advance your goals.

Link your passions to the scholarship

One of the first things to consider is to express who you are in your writing. Show scholarship providers why you deserve this scholarship by painting them a picture of who you are and what drives you. But remember to keep it related to the scholarship. For example:

• If you’re applying for a journalism-related scholarship, explain how you became interested in journalism, and what kind of journalism you hope to pursue.
• If you’re applying to a community service scholarship , explain what kind of community service you do and why you’re committed to it.

Show your grit

This is where your scholarship essay might get personal . You might deserve this scholarship because you have persevered through some personal struggles. Those struggles might be more serious–for example, related to family income (growing up poor) or physical obstacles (a disability or injury). Or it might be a more fleeting personal circumstance (like not getting that student organization position you were vying for).

In any case, focus on how you overcame these difficulties–and how the experiences have shaped who you are today. Also remember to focus it back on the scholarship topic at hand.

For example, if you’re applying to an arts scholarship, you might say:

Although I always loved art, growing up poor in a rural area made it difficult to have access to the fine arts museums (far away) or materials (too expensive). So I made do in other ways. I borrowed art books from the library and did virtual tours of the Met and the MOMA from my home computer. And since I couldn’t afford a fancy SLDR camera, I learned all the iPhone photography tricks I could, and used open-source software to do post-production on my photos.

This kind of statement shows how much the student loves art and the lengths the’ve gone to, in order to explore the medium, despite obstacles. A scholarship committee might read this and think: “This student is particularly deserving of our scholarship.

Share what you plan to do with the scholarship award

Why you are deserving doesn’t just have to do with your past achievements; it also has to do with your future plans and goals. Scholarship providers want to fund students who will go on to achieve great things or who wish to give back to their communities.

For instance, in scholarship winner Michelle Marie Charles’ essay, she explains how the award money will be put to good use:

My wish is to help guide undocumented people to obtain a job in a foreign country, and to fight for them to stay in the country. […] Once I am an attorney, I will seek new opportunities to expand the help provided to immigrants. I will create programs that specifically target undocumented people to know their own voice and to educated themselves about the law. […] I know the long journey that lays ahead of them and know how difficult the process of transferring to undocumented to citizen is, but I want to be there so they know that they still have a choice.

Examples of “Why I Deserve It” scholarship essay s

In general, there are three ways we’ve seen Going Merry students successfully tackle this essay. 

1. Treat it like a résumé, in paragraph form.

Since it’s asking you to brag about your strengths, some essay answers simply describe the applicant’s multiple accomplishments (either in chronological order, or grouped by interest/category – like academics, sports, research, student clubs). This is a particularly good strategy if the scholarship application doesn’t ask for a résumé or list of extracurricular activities. In that case, this essay is your opportunity to discuss those.

An example version of this might read like this :

“I [have been committed] to programs that would further develop my view of the world. I have been involved in Choir and Music Club. I have also been a member of the Red Crescent club for 3 years, which has expanded my exposures to other cultures by learning another language and studying multiple customs. I have been the captain of both the varsity golf and softball teams for two years, developing my leadership skills. My involvement in both my school and community prove that I am a student committed to developing a promising future.”

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2. Treat it like a personal statement. 

Maybe you deserve the scholarship because of the type of person you are: someone who has overcome adversity, thinks deeply, is passionate about a specific subject, or wants to contribute to their community. In that case, you might simply be able to reuse your personal statement , tweaking it slightly to be able to explain how your personal characteristics or narrative make you a deserving scholarship recipient. 

One example of this is Going Merry winner Jesús Adrian Arroyo-Ramirez’s essay , which discusses how he overcame the obstacle of his immigration status. He writes:

I was illegally brought to this country when I was just six years old. At the time I had no clue that I was breaking any laws, and I did not realize the fact that my life was going to change forever. Growing up with a different citizenship situation than my peers was and still is the biggest challenge I have to face in my life. Looking back there is not a single thing that I would change. Knowing that I had to work harder than everyone else led me to be the person that I am today. I took that fire inside of me, pushed myself, graduated first in my class with a cumulative 4.0 GPA, became a Kansas Scholar, and graduated High School with a semester’s worth of college credit. In November of 2016, everything began to look up for me. I received a work permit and a social security card all thanks to the DACA program. I was finally able to get my license, get a job, and most importantly attend college. I plan to continue my success in the classroom and do everything to the best of my ability as I know that under my current circumstances it can all be ripped away from me at any moment. Growing up with my situation has taught me to not take advantage of a single opportunity. 

3. Treat it like a career and/or academic goals essay. 

You’re likely using your scholarship money to attend college or grad school, so that you can pursue certain academic or career interests. You can discuss those, and then explain how scholarship funding would allow you to continue down that intended path, just like this short essay did : 

“The scholarship award will only push me further towards my Accounting degree and my dreams of one day having a successful career as an Accountant. […] Five years from now I see myself employed at a large local firm, crunching numbers, evaluating,and solving certain financial matters. I just feel blessed that I am given the opportunity to be awarded a scholarship to help fulfill my dream and I will prove that I do have what it takes to not only be a successful student, but an outstanding accountant.”

Here’s a guide on writing a career goals essay , and another guide for writing an essay on your academic goals . 

Is this the same question as “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” Yes and no. Both questions get at the same core idea (why are you relevant and deserving of the scholarship money), so for both essay prompts, your essay should describe your strengths and future plans. 

However, to properly answer this “why are you applying” question, you’ll need to more explicitly address your interest in the scholarship topic (e.g. if it’s a scholarship for nursing, why are you interested in nursing), as well as information about your financial situation (you are likely applying because you have need for the money, to pay for college or grad school). 

What about this one? Is this the same question?

Nope! This is a question about financial need. Although it may be uncomfortable to discuss, this prompt is asking you directly about your financial situation and why additional funding is necessary for you to pursue your academic or career plans.  Here’s more information about how to write a statement of financial need .

Also, check out this helpful list of the 10 most common scholarship essay topics to get started!

Now that you’ve got a better grasp on how to answer a prompt like, “Explain why you deserve this scholarship,” we think you’re ready to start writing and applying to scholarships! Get started by signing up for a free profile with Going Merry . You can write your essay and apply to thousands of scholarships . Just think of us as your one-stop shop for all things scholarships, including essay writing resources.

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How To Write A Scholarship Essay Why You Deserve

• 6 minute read

• November 30, 2023
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How To Write A Scholarship Essay Why You Deserve? When you apply for a scholarship, you will be presented with a ton of different essay prompts. Two of the most common questions are “Why do I deserve this scholarship? ” or its variant “Why should I apply for this scholarship?” These questions may seem scary but don’t overthink them.

In the pursuit of higher education, scholarships stand as invaluable tools that not only alleviate financial burdens but also open doors to opportunities that might otherwise remain out of reach. As you embark on the journey to secure a scholarship, one critical element takes centre stage—the scholarship essay. This piece serves as a personal canvas where you have the chance to paint a vivid picture of your aspirations, achievements, and the reasons why you are deserving of financial support for your academic endeavours.

In this guide, we will unravel the art of crafting a compelling scholarship essay, providing insights and strategies to help you effectively communicate why you deserve the scholarship you are vying for. Let’s delve into the key components that will transform your words into a powerful narrative, showcasing your unique qualities, experiences, and aspirations that make you a standout candidate.

These are simple questions that are easy to answer. Here’s how:

•  What do scholarship committees look for?
• Thinking Tips “Why I Deserve It” Scholarship Essay Examples Variations: “Why Apply for This Scholarship
• Why do I need this scholarship?
• Are you ready to start answering?
• How to start an essay prompt like this?

What do scholarship committees want?

Scholarship providers want to award awards to the most deserving students. So if you include these prompts, you’re asking questions like: Why should it be you? What they specifically want to know is:

• What makes you unique?
• What are your special interests and motivations?
• How do your strengths and goals relate to this particular scholarship?

For example, are the reasons you deserve an athletic scholarship different from the reasons you deserve a financial scholarship? Scholarship donors want to know that their award is making a difference. Show them how this money will help you achieve your goals.

Tips to Consider

One of the first things to consider is expressing who you are in your writing. Show the scholarship recipient why you are worthy of this scholarship by portraying who you are and what drives you. But don’t forget about the scholarship connection.

• If you are applying for a journalism fellowship, please explain how you became interested in journalism and what type of journalism you would like to pursue.
• If you are applying for a community service grant, please explain what type of community service you do and why you are passionate about it.

Sharing What You Plan To Do With Your Scholarship.

Past success isn’t the only reason you deserve it. It also concerns your plans and goals. Scholarship providers want to fund students who will go on to achieve great things or give something back to their communities. For example, in scholarship holder Michelle Marie Charles’ essay, she explains how the prize money will be used wisely: My wish is to be undocumented It’s about helping people find jobs abroad and fighting for them abroad. The country will remain. […] Once I become a lawyer, I plan to explore new ways to expand support for immigrants. I create programs specifically aimed at undocumented immigrants so they can find their voice and learn about the law. […] I know we have a long way to go and how difficult the process of transitioning from undocumented status to citizenship is, but I want to be there to let them know they still have options.

Why Am I Eligible for a Scholarship Essay Example

In general, three ways Going Mary students successfully approached this essay.

Treat it like a paragraph resume:

Because you are asked to boast about your strengths, some essay responses simply describe the applicant’s various accomplishments (in chronological order, or academics, sports, research, student clubs, etc.) (grouped by interest/category).

This is an especially good strategy if your scholarship application doesn’t require a resume or list of extracurricular activities. In this case, this essay is an opportunity to discuss them. A sample version of this would look like this: I am working on a program that develops the way I see the world. I was in a choir and a music club. I have also been an active member of the Red Crescent Society for three years, learning another language and learning different customs has expanded my contact with other cultures. I served as captain of my university’s golf and softball teams for two years, honing my leadership skills. My involvement in both the school and the community proves that I am a student who is committed to building a promising future.

Treat it Like a Personal Statement.

Maybe you deserve the scholarship because of the type of person you are: someone who has overcome adversity thinks deeply, is passionate about a specific subject, or wants to contribute to their community. In that case, you might simply be able to reuse your statement , tweaking it slightly to be able to explain how your characteristics or narrative make you a deserving scholarship recipient.

One example of this is  Going Merry winner Jesús Adrian Arroyo-Ramirez’s essay , which discusses how he overcame the obstacle of his immigration status. He writes:

I was illegally brought to this country when I was just six years old. At the time I had no clue that I was breaking any laws, and I did not realize the fact that my life was going to change forever. Growing up in a different citizenship situation than my peers was and still is the biggest challenge I have to face in my life.

Looking back there is not a single thing that I would change. Knowing that I had to work harder than everyone else led me to be the person that I am today. I took that fire inside of me, pushed myself, graduated first in my class with a cumulative 4.0 GPA, became a Kansas Scholar, and graduated High School with a semester’s worth of college credit. In November of 2016, everything began to look up for me. I received a work permit and a social security card all thanks to the DACA program. I was finally able to get my license, get a job, and most importantly attend college.

I plan to continue my success in the classroom and do everything to the best of my ability as I know that under my current circumstances, it can all be ripped away from me at any moment. Growing up with my situation has taught me to not take advantage of a single opportunity.

3 . Treat it like a career

You’re likely using your scholarship money to attend college or grad school so that you can pursue certain academic or career interests. You can discuss those, and then explain how scholarship funding would allow you to continue down that intended path, just like  this short essay did :

“The scholarship award will only push me further towards my Accounting degree and my dreams of one day having a successful career as an Accountant. […] Five years from now I see myself employed at a large local firm, crunching numbers, evaluating, and solving certain financial matters. I just feel blessed that I am allowed to be awarded a scholarship to help fulfill my dream and I will prove that I do have what it takes to not only be a successful student, but an outstanding accountant.”

Here’s a guide on  writing a career goals essay , and another guide for writing an  essay on your academic goals .

I believe that receiving a scholarship would not only alleviate this financial stress but also provide me with the validation and recognition that I have worked hard to achieve. Knowing that someone else recognizes and values my efforts would give me the motivation and encouragement to continue pushing myself toward success.

Frequently Asked Questions

• A: Highlight your achievements, goals, and unique qualities. Showcase how the scholarship aligns with your aspirations and contributes to your academic journey.
• A: Yes, typically, include an introduction, a body with supporting evidence, and a strong conclusion. Follow any specific guidelines provided by the scholarship provider.
• A: Tell a compelling story, be authentic, and emphasize personal experiences that demonstrate your character, resilience, and commitment to your academic and career goals.

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“Why Do You Deserve This Scholarship” Essay (+Examples)

While landing a full-ride scholarship might seem like hitting the jackpot, numerous scholarships offer amounts between $1000 to $5000. With the right strategy, these can significantly reduce college debt and associated expenses. But here’s the catch: crafting the perfect scholarship essay is often a requirement. Surprisingly, many students overlook the immense impact of a compelling essay, even though it’s a cornerstone of college admissions. This essay is a canvas to paint who you are, your values, and your aspirations. And often, the pivotal question to address is: “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” For those seeking an edge, there are resources like scholarship essays for sale to help craft the perfect piece. But in this guide, we break down how to ace that pivotal question and increase your scholarship odds. Plus, stick around for a sample essay to spark your inspiration.

Twelve keys to a successful scholarship essay (summary):

Why do you deserve this scholarship essay: how to write it properly, 1. write at least 500 words.

This will show that you care and want the scholarship. But, the essay won’t be too long to bore the review committee.

2. Respect the grammar, vocabulary, and formatting rules

5 paragraphs (1 for the introduction, 3 body paragraphs, and 1 for the conclusion). Make sure the essay is free of typos and grammatical errors. That’s the first step to writing a winning scholarship essay.

3. Give strong reasons for why you deserve the scholarship and what will you do with the money – be specific.

Powerful reasons drive human behavior. You can think about your essay as a persuasive letter that needs to evoke certain feelings and emotions. Brainstorm and come up with a few great reasons you deserve it. Adding the word “because” snowballs the chances of eliciting a positive response. A famous example from a persuasion study:

“I have 5 pages, Can I use the Xerox machine before you because I’m in a rush” got a 94% success rate vs. 60% when no “reason why” was given.

“I deserve this scholarship because I graduated top of my class, even though I still had to help my little sister with her homework”. “I would be so grateful if I could receive this scholarship because my family is in a tough financial situation now, and my younger sister also dreams about going to college”.

4. Include a powerful, memorable story

There was one  essay that got a student into 14 colleges , including Harvard, Stanford, and Princeton. Although a scholarship essay is different, you can use principles from an admissions essay to achieve the desired results. The secret ingredient in this one was a powerful personal story about bullying and reconciliation with a homeland.

Here’s an excerpt:

This memory has woven itself into my philosophy and my dreams. The very personal knowledge that millions live in a way such that electric toothbrushes are an unfathomable luxury (my cousin, Aina), has given me the following personal rules:

If you can, include a beautifully written, personal story like this in the essay, you will be so much closer to getting the scholarship you deserve.

5. Use words with an emotional impact

6. give proof of why you deserve it.

If you want to convince the committee that you truly deserve to receive a scholarship, you need to back up your claims with solid proof. It’s not enough to share powerful stories, and give strong “reasons why”. You also need to make the case more believable by proving that what you say is true. You need to be specific in this area. Do you have excellent grades in high school? Your GPA is off the charts? Did you take part in interesting extracurricular activities? Do you have high achievements in sports and athletics? Did you win an award for your accomplishments? An important person gave you a word of praise? Did you score north of 1400 on your SAT or notched a score of at least 24 on the ACT? You can use these things to make your claim more believable. Make it appear that you deserve the money because of your true accomplishments and hard work. Example: “In my senior year of High School, I received the MVP award for my accomplishments in football. My coach said he sees me in the big leagues if I work hard enough for it.”

7. Hook – get attention from the very beginning

The scholarship committee has to go through dozens and dozens of essays and applications every day. Most of them are quite bland and follow the same tired script. To stand out, you need to come up with an attention-grabbing paragraph  that will stop them in their tracks and get them focused. This is called a “hook”. There are a couple of ways in which you can do it.

You can start with:

8. demonstrate the right attitude, 9. paint a bright picture of your future, 10. call to action (close the essay with a bang), additional tips for editing and managing the scholarship essay:, an example of a “why do you deserve this scholarship” essay.

Two-thirds of students who earned a four-year degree borrowed for college. The average student loan is $28,500. These numbers seem mild in comparison to what I and my family are facing. My older brother and sister are already in college because my mom always wanted us to be  well-educated and make a positive impact on society. But this has caused us to borrow, and now we’re over $60,000 in debt. Our father is never here to help us as he left us when we were still small children. But this hasn’t stopped me from dreaming and painting a brighter vision for my future. I know that to get out of this situation, I will have to work harder than anyone else around me. Even though I’m young, I have already worked part-time in a local cafeteria and earned a little bit of money  on the side as a blogger to help my family. My true vocation is architecture. Ever since I was a child, I used to flip through the pages of “The Most Beautiful Buildings in The World” book in the nearby library and think that one day, I too would be able to construct magnificent structures full of light and color. I’m drawing as much as I can, and I have already filled 12 notebooks with my projects. I also received straight “A’s” in mathematics and physics since the very beginning of my school time. I even got first place in my high school art competition and my teachers say I’m going to accomplish great things in the future. I am dedicated to succeeding no matter what, but nowadays it’s becoming harder and harder because I have to save every penny and worry about money almost all the time. I fear that instead of pursuing my dream, I will have to settle for a low-paying job simply to survive and help my mom. But I don’t want to postpone my studies and wait until my siblings pay off their debt. I don’t want to put everything on hold. If I received a bit of financial help, it would be so much easier for me to go through college and become somebody. I deserve this scholarship because of my hard work, dedication, fantastic grades, and my entrepreneurial spirit. I promise I will make this money go a long way and continue with my efforts to make the world  a better place. I’m eagerly waiting for your response.

As you can see, writing a “Why do you deserve this scholarship” essay is easier than it seems. Once you have the final draft, you can use it as a template (with modifications), when applying for many scholarships. The important thing in scholarship essays is to push the right emotional buttons, share the exact reasons you deserve the money, and never give up until you get the scholarship. Don’t trust the companies that say they will find the scholarships for you and write  the best essay that will guarantee success. No one cares about your situation more than you, and it’s who needs to show up as a hard worker with strong leadership skills to make it happen.

Rafal Reyzer

Hey there, welcome to my blog! I'm a full-time entrepreneur building two companies, a digital marketer, and a content creator with 10+ years of experience. I started RafalReyzer.com to provide you with great tools and strategies you can use to become a proficient digital marketer and achieve freedom through online creativity. My site is a one-stop shop for digital marketers, and content enthusiasts who want to be independent, earn more money, and create beautiful things. Explore my journey here , and don't miss out on my AI Marketing Mastery online course.

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Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, why do i deserve this scholarship (sample answers).

I'm working on some scholarship applications, and a common essay question is 'why do you deserve this scholarship?' I would appreciate some sample answers or guidance on how I should address this question. What should I focus on to show that I'm a deserving candidate?

When approaching the "why do you deserve this scholarship?" question, it's essential to focus on your unique qualities, achievements, and goals that set you apart as a candidate. Here's some guidance and a sample answer to help you get started:

1. Start by highlighting your academic achievements: Mention your GPA, any honors or AP classes you've taken, and any academic awards you've received. This demonstrates your commitment to your education and capability to succeed in a rigorous academic setting.

Sample: "I have maintained a 4.0 GPA throughout my high school career, taking challenging AP courses such as Calculus and Chemistry. I also ranked in the top 5% of my class and was inducted into the National Honor Society, showing my dedication to my academics."

2. Discuss your extracurricular activities: Focus on relevant, impactful extracurriculars that show your dedication to your passions, leadership skills, and community involvement. This could range from participating in sports, clubs, or community service projects.

Sample: "As the president of the Environmental Club, I led efforts to organize campus clean-ups, creating awareness campaigns on recycling, and secured funding for solar panels. I also volunteered at the local animal shelter, dedicating my time to care for animals in need."

3. Describe any unique challenges you've faced: Sometimes, overcoming adversity can demonstrate the resilience and determination that scholarship committees value. If applicable, share the challenges you've faced in your personal life or educational journey and how you've persevered.

Sample: "Growing up in a low-income family, I juggled multiple part-time jobs to save money for college while excelling in my studies. Despite the challenges, I successfully advocated for a tutoring program at my school to support students from similar backgrounds as myself."

4. Tie in your future goals: Explain how the scholarship will help you achieve your goals, whether that includes furthering your education, giving back to your community, or kickstarting your career. Show the scholarship committee that their investment in you will pay dividends in the long run.

Sample: "With this scholarship, I plan to pursue a degree in environmental engineering, so I can help develop sustainable solutions to pressing environmental issues. My long-term goal is to work with community leaders and nonprofits to create greener spaces in underprivileged areas, empowering residents to take control of their environment."

Putting it all together:

"I am a dedicated student with a 4.0 GPA, excelling in challenging AP classes and involved in my community as president of the Environmental Club and a volunteer at the local animal shelter. Despite facing financial adversity, I've continued to persevere, even advocating for a tutoring program at my school. This scholarship would enable me to pursue my passion for environmental engineering, ultimately allowing me to give back to my community and work towards creating a more sustainable world. It's because of my commitment to academic success, resilience in the face of challenges, and unwavering determination to contribute positively to society that I believe I deserve this scholarship."

About CollegeVine’s Expert FAQ

CollegeVine’s Q&A seeks to offer informed perspectives on commonly asked admissions questions. Every answer is refined and validated by our team of admissions experts to ensure it resonates with trusted knowledge in the field.

10 reasons why I deserve a scholarship [model answers and prompt]

Scholarships are an essential aid for many students, but what does it take to secure one? Answering “why do I deserve a scholarship” can feel challenging, yet it’s the key to opening many educational opportunities.

In this article, we break down the top 10 reasons why you might be a deserving candidate, alongside advice on what scholarship committees are seeking.

From displaying academic excellence to overcoming adversity, we provide model answers to help you articulate your story convincingly.

We’ll also guide you on aligning your essay with the funders’ mission, offering tips on crafting a tailored, impactful application.

Read on to equip yourself with the insights and confidence to assert “why I deserve a scholarship”.

Why Do I Deserve A Scholarship? Here are some awesome prompts for your response:

Use the essay prompts below to help beat writer’s block for your essay, especially when crafting a scholarship essay sample.

Essay Prompts and Questions to Answer for your Essay on Why I Deserve a Scholarship:

• “One of my proudest academic achievements is…”
• “I have consistently maintained a GPA of… because…”
• “Due to my family’s financial situation, I have faced challenges such as…”
• “A scholarship would significantly alleviate financial stress by…”
• “I have been actively involved in community service by…”
• “Through my volunteer work with… I have learned…”
• “I demonstrated leadership as the president of…”
• “In my role as captain of the… team, I was responsible for…”
• “I have a unique talent for… which I have developed by…”
• “My skills in… have led me to achieve…”
• “I conducted a research project on… which resulted in…”
• “Leading the project on… taught me…”
• “One significant challenge I have overcome is…”
• “Despite facing… I have managed to…”
• “My passion for… began when…”
• “I am committed to… because I believe…”
• “As the first person in my family to attend college, I have…”
• “This scholarship will help me overcome the challenges of being a first-generation student by…”
• “I contribute to diversity in my community by…”
• “My background in… has allowed me to…”
• “My long-term career goal is to…”
• “Achieving this goal is important to me because…”
• “I have been involved in… which has helped me…”
• “Participating in… has taught me the importance of…”
• “One innovative idea I have is…”
• “In the future, I plan to work on projects that…”
• “My academic plan includes…”
• “My career plan is to…”
• “The values that drive me include…”
• “I am motivated by… because…”

Sentence Starters:

• “I believe I deserve this scholarship because…”
• “My academic record shows…”
• “Financial support is crucial for me as…”
• “Volunteering at… has shaped my…”
• “As a leader, I have…”
• “My unique talent in… has…”
• “Despite facing…, I have…”
• “My commitment to studying… is evident through…”
• “Being a first-generation college student means…”
• “Diversity is important to me because…”
• “My career aspirations include…”
• “Participating in… has allowed me to…”
• “I have a vision for… that involves…”
• “My educational journey includes plans to…”
• “The core values that guide me are…”

Check out my YouTube video on crafting the best personal statement to support your scholarship application!

Why Do Scholarship Organizers Ask This Question?

According to the US Department of Education in Trends From 1995–96 to 2007–08 show us that:

• Total grant aid: $116 billion
• Average grant aid per student: $4900

And the source of the funding is mainly from Universities:

Scholarship organizers ask applicants to answer specific questions to gain a deeper understanding of their motivations and aspirations and give out quite a limited amount of money.

By posing these questions, they are able to assess whether the candidates truly deserve the scholarship opportunity.

The scholarship committee wants to identify individuals who not only have financial need but also display a genuine passion for their field of study or have a compelling personal story.

Moreover, these questions serve as a way to distinguish applicants from one another. It allows the committee to recognize those who stand out and have the potential to make a significant impact in their chosen field.

Scholarship organizers often inquire about how the applicant plans to utilize the funds.

This helps ensure that the scholarship money is going towards a worthy cause and will be used in a productive and beneficial manner.

Therefore, it is crucial for applicants to carefully consider their way to answer these questions, as a well-thought-out response can greatly increase their chances of receiving the scholarship and ultimately, achieving their educational goals. 

What’s the scholarship committee looking for?

The scholarship committee seeks applicants who align with their mission and priorities.

To impress them, adhere strictly to guidelines, including word counts. You may even be called in to a meeting and interview. Check out this link for the best scholarship interview tips!

Research the organization thoroughly, understanding its vision, goals, and objectives.

Reflect these in your essay to show shared values. If no formatting instructions are given, stick to a standard 12-point Times New Roman font with double spacing.

Think from the reviewer’s perspective and ensure your essay resonates with the funders’ priorities.

Tailor your content to the organization’s focus areas.

For example, if you’re a biology major interested in microbiology, emphasize this if it’s relevant to the scholarship. Use the scholarship as a platform to showcase your specific interests. Make your application specific, personal, and focused on the scholarship provider’s interests.

The application isn’t just about you ; it’s about how well you fit with the scholarship’s purpose.

Tips to consider for writing a “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” essay – sample answers

Writing a “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” essay can be challenging.

Begin by sharing your story, focusing on your accomplishments, demonstrating how you’re a hard worker, your leadership or volunteer experiences make you a deserving candidate for the scholarship.

Here are some elements that you should consider including in your application.

• Express Aspirations for Community Service : Make sure to express your desire to create a positive impact on the community through something like a scholarship fund, nonprofit, charity, or other forms of community service in your scholarship essay. This shows relatability to the scholarship committee.
• Personalize Your Application : Try to personalize your application by addressing the scholarship board directly, or including a heartfelt message in your thank you note.
• Elaborate on Your Financial Situation : If there are significant financial circumstances that weren’t covered in your FAFSA application, mention them. Highlight special circumstances like extensive medical bills, family situations, etc., that necessitate additional financial support.
• Narrate Your Growth Journey : Include a story of personal growth or overcoming a challenge in your essay. This can be a narrative of triumphing over hardships in a particular class or a life event.
• State Your Career Goals : Clearly state your major or career goals, and what inspired you to pursue them. Use simple, understandable language especially when applying for scholarships not directly related to your field of study.
• Mention Relevant Experiences : Include the activities, community service, clubs, associations, and coursework that relate to your major or career goals. Don’t just list them, narrate how these experiences have shaped you and prepared you for your career.
• Demonstrate How the Scholarship Will Help : Without sounding entitled, explain how receiving the scholarship will aid in your academic journey. Try to be humble and indirect, stating your need without sounding too desperate.
• Detail Your Life Goals : Including your long-term life goals in your essay gives the scholarship committee a clear vision of your future plans.
• Show Your Community Involvement : Indicate any community involvement that relates to your career or life goals. This shows that you’re proactive and already engaged in activities aligned with your objectives.
• Highlight Leadership Positions : If you’ve held leadership roles, elaborate on the duties and responsibilities associated with those positions. This demonstrates initiative, management skills, and responsibility.
• Name Your Role Models : Mention who has motivated you or had a significant impact on your life. You could quote them if their words tie into the overall theme of your essay.

The scholarship committee is seeking a worthy cause, so illustrate how supporting your dreams aligns with their values. 

Proofread attentively, ensuring your scholarship essay is clear, persuasive, and free of errors.

By following these tips, your answer to “why you deserve this scholarship” may compel the committee to acknowledge you as a deserving scholarship recipient. 

Tips on Answering “Why Do I Deserve a Scholarship?”

It’s essential to frame your achievements on a scholarship application not as bragging, but showcasing your capability and motivation. This approach can turn your essay into a compelling scholarship opportunity.

Acknowledge that your need, while genuine, isn’t to beg but to highlight how the scholarship helps you overcome your challenges.

Here are the best ways to do this!

1. Understanding the Scholarship Essay Question

Understanding the essay question, “Why do I deserve this scholarship?” is crucial for drafting a compelling response. Don’t see it as a mere requirement but as an opportunity to make your case convincingly and uniquely.

2. Focusing on the Future: How Scholarships Support Career Goals

Scholarships aren’t just about avoiding student debt, they’re stepping stones towards your future career. Discuss how this scholarship will facilitate your long-term educational goals and broader contributions to society.

3. Aligning Your Interests: Tailoring Your Answer to the Scholarship’s Purpose

Research the organization offering the scholarship. If it’s associated with a specific field or honors a certain individual, tailor your response to reflect alignment with the scholarship’s purpose or values.

4. Crafting a Story: The Importance of Using Specific Examples

Generalizations rarely make an impact. Instead, use specific examples from your life that highlight your attributes. Show the judges your qualities rather than just telling them.

5. Showcasing Kindness: Illustrating Personal Attributes with Real-Life Instances

Demonstrate your kindness, selflessness, or commitment to community service through real experiences. A story that shows your empathy and care can set you apart from the crowd.

6. Overcoming Challenges: The Art of Displaying Resilience in Scholarship Essays

Sharing how you’ve overcome obstacles shows your resilience and problem-solving skills, characteristics highly valued by scholarship committees. Highlight your ability to turn challenges into opportunities.

7. Striking a Balance: Sharing Past Struggles without Dwelling on Them

While it’s important to share past struggles, the focus should be on your resilience and how you’ve overcome these challenges. It’s not about evoking sympathy, but about demonstrating your strength and determination.

8. Ensuring Success: Proving Your Potential through Past Experiences

Showcase your potential for success by drawing on past experiences that demonstrate your commitment and determination. The more convincingly you can argue this, the more likely you are to secure the scholarship.

9. Utilizing the Word Count: Maximizing Your Space for Maximum Impact

Using the maximum word limit allows you to provide a detailed and compelling response. Don’t write less than the limit and don’t exceed it. Every word is an opportunity to persuade the committee.

10. Conclusion: Effectively Conveying Why You Deserve the Scholarship

Wrap up your essay by summarizing your key points. Reiterate your passion, commitment, and potential, leaving a lasting impression of why you indeed deserve the scholarship.

Wrapping up – applying for a scholarship so you are awarded a scholarship

Applying for a scholarship involves more than just financial need or exceptional grades.

It’s about convincing the selection committee that you not only align with their mission and values but that you also bring unique qualities that set you apart from other candidates.

It’s about sharing your life’s journey, demonstrating your resilience, and illustrating how the scholarship will help you in furthering your education, achieving your career goals, and making a difference in your community.

Your scholarship essay should be a blend of your aspirations, achievements, personal struggles, and the difference you aspire to make. It should give a compelling answer to the question, “Why do I deserve this scholarship?”

Your response should showcase your commitment, determination, and the potential for success you’ve demonstrated through your academic or career experiences so far.

Applying for scholarships can seem daunting, but with a bit of time, effort, and using the tips provided in this blog, you can craft a winning scholarship essay that resonantly answers “Why I deserve this scholarship?”.

Always remember, it’s not just about whether you think you’re deserving but being able to effectively communicate this to the scholarship committee.

So, take the leap, believe you deserve to win, and put forth your best self in your application.

Best of luck with your journey!

Dr Andrew Stapleton has a Masters and PhD in Chemistry from the UK and Australia. He has many years of research experience and has worked as a Postdoctoral Fellow and Associate at a number of Universities. Although having secured funding for his own research, he left academia to help others with his YouTube channel all about the inner workings of academia and how to make it work for you.

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How to Write an Essay on ‘Why I Deserve This Scholarship’

Scholarships & Financial Aid

Updated on April 11th, 2024

While there are a lot of potential topics a committee may want a student to cover in their scholarship essay, the “why I deserve this scholarship” essay prompt is one of the most common ones around.

Ultimately, it seems simple at its core, but the “why I deserve this scholarship” topic can feel like the most complex question on the planet if your child isn’t sure how to tackle it.

Ideally, your student needs to strike a balance in their tone, making sure they don’t come off arrogant while also not selling themselves short. Additionally, they need to cater their response to their target audience, the scholarship committee.

If your child isn’t sure how to begin, here are some tips for writing a winning “why I deserve this scholarship” essay.

• 1.1 Consider the Source of the “Why I Deserve This Scholarship” Question
• 1.2 Use Examples, Not Trait Descriptions
• 3 Look to the Future
• 4.1 Related Video: Scholarship Essay Sample About Why I Deserve The Scholarship

Why I Deserve This Scholarship: Having the Right Attitude

It isn’t uncommon for students to struggle with the “why I deserve this scholarship” prompt because of self-doubt. Not everyone is comfortable tooting their own horn, and some even have trouble viewing their academic achievements and accomplishments as noteworthy, their experiences as valuable, and their perspective as unique.

However, nearly every student has overcome an obstacle over the course of their life or had to persevere through personal struggles to reach a point of academic excellence and success. That means they do have something to share that can showcase why they deserve the scholarship.

Before your child begins writing their “why I deserve this scholarship” essay, they need to have the right mindset. It’s important for them to realize that they are worthy and to use that feeling to drive their writing.

If your student needs a little help, consider sitting down with them and reflecting on their biggest achievements. Remember, the accomplishments don’t have to be academic. Life experiences of all kinds can qualify, so don’t be afraid to mention events that happened outside of the classroom.

Consider the Source of the “Why I Deserve This Scholarship” Question

When your child writes a scholarship essay, the scholarship committee is their target audience. After all, these are the people who select the winner, so catering the content to them can help your student force a stronger, more meaningful connection with the committee members.

As your child gets ready to brainstorm ideas, they need to keep the community involvement organization behind the scholarship in mind. This allows them to choose the accomplishments that will genuinely speak to the reader.

For example, a scholarship from a charity that focuses on giving back to the local community may appreciate hearing about your student’s volunteer experiences. A for-profit company might connect with your child’s story about running a side business or how they worked part-time while maintaining a high GPA. Organizations that focus on academics could connect with your student’s work as a tutor or time spent participating in school clubs or community organizations that enhanced their learning experience.

By focusing on the scholarship provider, your child can select accomplishments and leadership skills that align with the organization’s values and goals. If they aren’t sure how to find this information, the organization’s “About Us” page on their website can provide powerful insights, especially in their mission and core values statements.

Ultimately, taking a little time to research the organization before your child writes their “why I deserve this scholarship” essay can pay off big if it gives them the ability to forge a more meaningful connection with their audience.

Use Examples, Not Trait Descriptions

Scholarship committees often get inundated with scholarship essays with statements like, “I’m a hard worker,” and other generalizations or platitudes. Sentences like that aren’t particularly powerful and aren’t almost guaranteed not to be convincing.

However, a well thought out example has the potential to sway hearts and minds. In the vast majority of cases, people enjoy stories, so your student should tell theirs in their “why I deserve this scholarship” essay. Encourage them to take people on a journey instead of using clichés. It will be significantly more impactful, and can dramatically improve their odds of being selected.

If you and your student are working on the scholarship application process, make sure you don’t miss our free scholarship training. It’s about 45 to 60 minutes long and I cover exactly where you can find more scholarships your student is actually eligible for and are legitimate. Grab your spot here:  6 Steps to Quickly Securing Scholarships for College

Look to the Future

Scholarship committees don’t just want to know where your student has come from; they also want to know where they are going. Along with discussing their accomplishments, your child should also include details about their career goals and how the scholarship funds can help them reach them.

To create an effective scholarship essay, your child will need to look beyond simply getting their college degree. For example, do they have a future career in mind? Do they want to change the world in some way? Is there something they are hoping to achieve outside of academia?

Once your student has an idea of career path and where they want to go, they need to explain how the can enable them to get there. For example, giving them the ability to attend a school with a rigorous and respected program in a relevant field that would otherwise be unaffordable could be a pertinent point.

Similarly, if the scholarship allows them to access additional experience that would help them excel, such as a chance to participate in a non-paid internship instead of working a part-time job, that could also be worth discussing.

The idea is to showcase that, by awarding your child this scholarship money, more people could benefit than just your student. In the end, a scholarship is an investment made by an organization, so they want to know that it is money well spent.

Related articles:

• How to Win Scholarships with the Right Scholarship Essay Format
• How to Get Started with Scholarships

How to Structure a Winning Essay

If your child wants to impress the scholarship committee, they need to make sure they use the proper structure when writing their essay, no matter what topic is being covered.

Generally, this involves starting with an introduction (also known as a thesis) that both catches the reader’s attention and summarizes what is going to be discussed. Then, they transition into the body of the essay, where each paragraph will cover a single point or a relevant example that addresses the topic. Finally, they again summarize the essay, reemphasize how their points support the topic, and discuss lessons learned to create a solid conclusion.

Related Video: Scholarship Essay Sample About Why I Deserve The Scholarship

If your student isn’t comfortable with creating the structure for their “why I deserve this scholarship” essay, have them check out this article: How to Write a Winning Essay . It covers the basics of everything from brainstorming to editing the final piece, providing them solid guidance to help them craft a great essay for any question they may encounter.

Ultimately, writing an amazing “why I deserve this scholarship” essay doesn’t have to be challenging. Your child just needs to consider their accomplishments, cater the achievements they cover to the audience, speak about the future, career aspirations and how the scholarship will help, and bundle it all together using the proper structure.

With a little self-reflection, your student can certainly come up with something that sets them apart and highlights why they are deserving candidate for such an amazing investment. And, if they have trouble, offer to sit down with them and reminisce about everything they’ve been through and achieved.

Everyone has something that makes them a deserving scholarship recipient, so bolster your student’s confidence and let them showcase their awesomeness for all the world (or, at least the scholarship committee) to see.

Related Video:

• 7 College Scholarship Essay Ideas to Win More Funding

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Feb 2, 2023

Why I Deserve This Scholarship Essay | Outlines and Examples

Are you applying to a scholarship program at your dream university? Here are some scholarship essay outlines and examples to help you stand out from the rest!

Crafting a compelling essay for your scholarship application is more than just a task; it's an opportunity to showcase your dedication, aspirations, and unique perspective. The weight of this essay cannot be understated – from its formatting to its grammar and content, every detail could sway the decision between acceptance and rejection. It's crucial to express both your academic achievements and your future career plans with clarity and confidence. For many, distilling their aspirations and achievements into a concise and persuasive essay can be daunting. If you ever feel lost or overwhelmed, consider turning to resources that can assist, such as online writing tools known to help streamline the process. They can be invaluable in guiding you, organizing your thoughts, and ensuring that your essay stands out in a sea of applications.

General tips on how to write a proper scholarship essay:

A scholarship essay should be clear and concise, it should also be unique to your own experiences to emphasize your unique qualities as a candidate for the scholarship. Here are some of our tips:

Emphasize your individual skills and promote your personal strengths by highlighting your achievements and projects. This will show the scholarship committee that you are worth investing in.

Be yourself and talk about your long-term goals and how you believe you can achieve them. You can also talk about your hobbies, goals, and interests outside of school, as this will further highlight your personality and give them an idea of who you are as a person.

Talk about the life experiences that have influenced you and why you want to study at this particular university/field of study. Make sure to relate your experiences to the scholarship you are applying for and how they will help you achieve your dreams.

Avoid using general statements like “I want to achieve my academic goals” or “I am passionate about this field.” General statements like this are overused and will not stand out to the scholarship committee. Make sure to state your specific goals and ambitions and use the essay to demonstrate why you should be awarded the scholarship.

Explain your personal characteristics that make you a deserving candidate for the scholarship. What makes you different from your other fellow students? What unique skills and talents do you have?

Write a short and concise overall summary of what you want to say in your essay of around 4-5 paragraphs. Make sure not to write too much content as this will only confuse the scholarship committee and make sure to write in a professional tone.

Make sure to give sufficient supporting details about your experiences by providing examples to support your ideas. Talk about your life past experiences like accomplishments, grades, and extracurricular activities that have helped shape who you are today.

Proofread and make proper adjustments. Make sure that you are taking breaks when creating your essay scholarship draft throughout the writing process to avoid burnout and ensure a high-quality final product. You can also ask a friend or a teacher to read your essay and scan through errors that you might have overlooked during the writing process.

Make sure to submit the scholarship essay before the deadline! After properly proofreading, make sure that the essay is submitted in a punctual manner to prevent disqualification due to late submissions.

Scholarship Essay Examples

Now that you are fully equipped with the guidelines and the tips mentioned above, we can now show you a couple of examples of how to write a scholarship essay for your dream university or field of interest.

Scholarship Essay Example #1

"Dear Scholarship Committee,

Two years ago, I learned that over 100,000 ocean animals die every year from plastic. Two years ago, I became committed to reducing the amount of plastic I use. Two years ago I became a minimalist.

I am the kind of person that once exposed to a fact, I am unable to turn a blind eye to it. When I understood the crux of consumerism and the impact that it was having on our earth, I knew that I had to do something about it.

I started small. I bought a stainless steel water bottle and started using reusable grocery bags. I stopped purchasing food items wrapped in plastic. I started making my own soap and deodorant. I started shopping in second-hand stores.

But, I knew that my initiatives weren’t enough. Sure, they were something. But I knew that I had to involve more people in my undertaking. So, naturally, I took to social media.

I began to share my zero-waste project with family and friends. I started to see a lot of support coming in. People were interested. How was I making my dish soap, they wanted to know. Where were the best second-hand shops? There was a response.

So, I started a Facebook page called “Clean Your Act” and began to share environmental problems that were happening around the world. I also shared my tips on reducing your waste.

I decided to start an environmental awareness group at my high school, during my junior year. I recruited an environmental science teacher to help me. Every week, I share with participants how-tos like starting a compost. We also have discussions on environmental issues plaguing our planet.

Next year, I will be starting my bachelor’s degree at the environmental science school of the University of Virginia. With the rising costs of college, it will be difficult for me to pay for the expenses on my own.

For this reason, I am applying to the Environmental Studies Scholarship Program. I have dreams of pursuing this field and by obtaining a degree in it, I know that I will get the necessary tools to grow my passion into something big.

I am going to work very hard in the program and learn all that I can. I am hoping to bring my “Clean Your Act” group to campus and get other students involved in the movement.

I am committed to saving our environment, one animal and tree at a time. I may not be able to save all 100,000 animals, but I can definitely save some of them. I don’t need to move mountains to save the world. But, if I can make others appreciate the mountains and our world, then they’ll want to learn how to treat it better."

This scholarship application works well because the writer is talking about relevant things related to the field he/she is applying for. The writer also talks about themselves and the learnings they have obtained through their experience thus far and how they plan on using their skills and their future education to help the world.

Another great thing about this scholarship essay is that the writer talks about their achievements and projects, which would make them stand out to the scholarship committee.

Scholarship Essay Example #2

"To Whom It May Concern:

My name is [Name] and I am a third-year student at Oklahoma State University. I am currently pursuing a five-year Bachelor of Architecture Degree. My plan is to follow up with a one-year master’s degree after I graduate.

In high school, I worked extensively with my local Habitat for Humanity branch to help build homes for low-income families. I learned about the construction process from the ground up, and I discovered the importance of function in architectural design. The homes we built during my four years as a volunteer were never extravagant. They served their purpose and became a beacon of hope for their owners.

My education has been focused on this mindset: function over form, stability over showmanship. I have enrolled in several classes that crossover to the Architectural Engineering major. My goal is to have a comprehensive view of how design meets structure. I have worked on three extra-credit residential design projects under the supervision of my architecture professors (Dr X and Dr Y). This helped speed up my research and education.

My goal is to become an architect to create accessible, affordable housing opportunities in underprivileged communities. Living in a college town, I have seen countless rental properties available. Yet there are few homes for sale that are affordable enough for college students and first-time buyers. This is the case in many towns throughout America, especially areas with a low standard of living. I want to create neighbourhoods that include affordable starter homes. This would enable low and middle-class families to build equity, avoid excessive debt, and create financial stability for their futures.

This summer, I will intern with LMNOP Architects. Upon completion of my master’s degree, I hope to continue there as I further develop my skills. After working under acclaimed residential architects Suzan Craft and Peter Wood, I would like to open my own architectural firm focused on developing inexpensive, high-quality housing. I also would like to work with Habitat for Humanity again, this time as an architect instead of a general labourer. I believe firmly in their mission to build “a world where everyone has a decent place to live.” I appreciate your consideration. With your help, I can continue my schooling in architecture and design to bring accessible homes to those in need.

This is another scholarship essay that clearly and concisely states the purposes of the program sought by the applicant. Additionally, they state details about the goals they want to attain in the near future if they get accepted by their desired school of choice. Again, clear aims are established as to why they desire to continue their education and how they plan to use the knowledge they gain through this new program.

Scholarship Essay Example #3

"Winston Churchill once said, “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” And while I never define my obstacles as ‘failures,’ I mark my success by my repeated perseverance through adversity. I have faced several challenges over the years, from dyslexia to homelessness; yet I continued to earn exemplary grades and graduate at the top of my class. I deserve this scholarship because I have the strength and determination to achieve my goals, no matter what hurdles I have to overcome.

I was not born a gifted student. Testing and assignments were always difficult for me, whether I studied or not. In second grade, my parents had me tested for learning disabilities. The psychologist said that I had a hyperactivity disorder and prescribed medication to suppress my energy. After two years of abiding by that treatment, I was re-evaluated and diagnosed with dyslexia. This helped me get the treatment I needed, and I finally made progress in school.

Shortly after I learned how to study with dyslexia, my father lost his job. He was the sole breadwinner for the household, and I was soon on the street with my mother and two younger siblings. I got a job in newspaper delivery, one of the few fields that will hire a 12-year-old. My father found odd jobs to bring money to the family, and together we were eventually able to pay for a two-bedroom apartment to live in. I was valedictorian that school year, and I maintained a perfect attendance record. Like my father, I knew I had to do whatever was necessary to succeed and thrive.

In high school, I developed an interest in psychology. I noticed patterns in behaviours, both in myself and in the people around me. I asked my child therapist, the one who officially diagnosed me with dyslexia if I could work at his clinic over the summers. He allowed me to intern at his counselling centre during my junior and senior years, and I gained valuable insight into the business side of psychology.

I am now entering the second year of my psychology degree. I plan to complete my bachelor’s degree and earn a Doctorate in Neuropsychology in the years that follow. My focus is on psychological testing, specifically for children with autism or learning disabilities. I spent years struggling in school because of a preventable misdiagnosis. I want to ensure that other children do not face the same struggles in the future.

Why do I deserve this scholarship? Because I have the passion and determination to become a trusted member of the psychological community. With my education, I can help children get the treatment they need at an early age, giving them the best chance at finding their own success. You’re not just helping me get through college. You’re improving the quality of life for countless families to come. I appreciate your consideration, and I look forward to building a lasting relationship with your organization."

This is yet another fantastic essay because the writer used a quote, a personal story, and the experiences that made them want to become a psychologist to help others overcome their struggles and live a better life. The quote they used was powerful and shows why the writer deserves the scholarship because they are determined to make their dreams come true despite the obstacles they face and want to do what others cannot in order to help others have a bright future. 

To sum it all up:

Writing a scholarship essay letter on why you deserve the scholarship is quite daunting and you really have to stand out from the rest in order to get accepted. So you need to really think about what makes you special and stand out from everyone else and give a clear reason as to why you should be getting the scholarship that you are asking for.

Jenni.ai is an AI writing assistant that can help you create a flawless scholarship college essay prompt that will greatly increase your chances of getting accepted to your dream university. So what are you waiting for? Get the help you need by signing up here today !

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Proving My Worth: Why I Deserve a Scholarship

One of the key benefits of writing an essay on why you deserve a scholarship is that it encourages you to think about the impact you want to have in your field of study or career, and how the scholarship can help you achieve your goals. You need to remember that your scholarship essay is your chance to make a strong impression on the scholarship committee. By showcasing your strengths, achievements, and potential, you can demonstrate why you deserve this scholarship and how it will help you achieve your goals.

Writing an essay requires time and effort, and some people may struggle with managing their time effectively to complete the task. By the way, with custom writing services, you can get expert guidance on how to craft a scholarship essay that addresses the prompt, meets the word count and showcases your unique strengths and qualifications.

Why I Deserve This Scholarship

As a college student, I constantly strive to achieve my academic and career goals. I believe that obtaining a scholarship would not only help me achieve these goals but also validate the hard work and dedication that I have put into my studies. Well, I would like to explain my thoughts in the essay about why I deserve a scholarship to help achieve my academic and career goals.

Scholarship Can Help Me Graduate with Honours

As a dedicated and hard-working student, one of my primary academic goals is to graduate with honours. However, the financial burden of pursuing higher education can often be overwhelming and distract from academic pursuits. That’s why I believe that a scholarship would be invaluable in helping me achieve my goals. With the financial assistance of a scholarship, I would be able to devote more time and energy to my studies, ultimately increasing my chances of graduating with honours. I could focus on taking challenging courses and conducting in-depth research, without the added stress of worrying about how to pay for tuition and living expenses. In addition to the academic benefits, a scholarship would also provide me with a sense of validation for my hard work and dedication. It would demonstrate that my efforts have been recognized and that others have acknowledged my potential for success.

Achieving a Graduate Degree in Psychology

Pursuing a graduate degree in psychology is an essential step towards achieving my career goal of becoming a psychologist. The advanced knowledge and training that a graduate degree provides will allow me to better understand human behaviour, diagnose and treat mental illnesses, and help others lead fulfilling lives. However, the high cost of graduate school is a significant obstacle for me. Without financial assistance, it will be difficult for me to pursue this path. That’s why I believe that a scholarship would greatly alleviate this concern and allow me to focus on my studies and career aspirations. With the support of a scholarship, I could attend the best graduate programs in psychology and receive a high-quality education that will prepare me for my future career. I would also be able to participate in research opportunities and gain hands-on experience in the field.

Gain Hands-On Experience and Achieve My Career Goals

In addition to my academic goals, I also have career goals that I am working towards. One of these goals is to gain practical experience in my field. I am currently working part-time as a research assistant, but I would like to have more opportunities to gain hands-on experience. A scholarship would allow me to focus on my studies while also providing me with the financial support to seek out internships and other opportunities that can help me achieve my career goals. Furthermore, a scholarship would provide me with the financial freedom to explore my interests and take risks. I believe that taking calculated risks is essential for personal and professional growth. With a scholarship, I would be able to take on new challenges and pursue opportunities that would have otherwise been out of reach.

I believe that receiving a scholarship would not only alleviate this financial stress but also provide me with the validation and recognition that I have worked hard to achieve. Knowing that someone else recognizes and values my efforts would give me the motivation and encouragement to continue pushing myself towards success.

Tips on How to Write a Scholarship Essay About Why You Deserve It

If you’re tasked with writing a scholarship essay on why you deserve to receive the award, it’s essential to highlight your accomplishments, strengths, and future potential. To help you begin crafting an impactful essay, here are some valuable tips to consider.

Understand the essay prompt

Before starting to write, make sure you understand the essay prompt and what the scholarship committee is looking for. Pay attention to the requirements, word count, and the main question or theme.

Highlight your achievements

Begin by listing your academic achievements, extracurricular activities, and any other accomplishments that demonstrate your skills and potential. These could include volunteer work, leadership roles, or personal challenges you have overcome.

Connect your achievements to your goals

Next, explain how your achievements relate to your academic and career goals. Show how the scholarship will help you achieve these goals and how you plan to use the scholarship funds.

Share your story

Personalize your essay by sharing your unique story and experiences. Explain any obstacles you have overcome and how these challenges have shaped you as a person.

Show your passion and dedication

Demonstrate your passion for your field of study or career path. Show how you are dedicated to achieving your goals and how the scholarship will help you get there.

Edit and proofread

Finally, make sure you edit and proofread your essay carefully. Check for grammar and spelling errors, and ensure that your essay flows logically and is easy to understand.

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How to Conquer “Why Do You Deserve This Scholarship?” Essays

FAQs , High School Students , Scholarship Mindset , Scholarships , Undergraduate Students

Scholarships for college or university often include an essay prompt. Scholarship committees give you a question and you do your best to answer it. One of the most common essay questions asked is: Why do you deserve this scholarship?

It’s a question that doesn’t have a universal answer. This is because there are several types of scholarships , which reward different things.

To win scholarships, the way you position your answer matters. If you want to compete with other students and stand out , you must do two things. First, show that you understand and appreciate why the scholarship exists, and second, show that your profile meets the criteria better than any other student.

Below, you’ll find more tips for these common “show us you deserve it” scholarship essays. After reading this post, you’ll know what a committee’s looking for and how you can best position your scholarship application.  

Why the Scholarship Exists

The first stop to understanding why a scholarship exists is to research what it’s all about. Things like when it was founded. Why? Who donated the money? Etc. You should always have a good understanding of these questions when you apply for scholarships.

Knowing these answers will give you a good idea about what the scholarship selection committee is looking for . Another place where you can learn more about the scholarship is the eligibility requirements . This tells you what specific criteria you need to meet to qualify for the prize and what you can use the scholarship money for . If the eligibility requirements state something like, “student must play an instrument,” then you should assume that music is important. Of course, you’ll want to reflect this in your scholarship essay.

Goal of the Scholarship: How Does Your Profile Relate?

Closely related to the above, you should also ask: What is the goal of the scholarship? This will help you understand your audience and position your scholarship essay for success. Here are a few examples of what the goals of certain scholarships may be.  

Merit-based scholarships : these are prizes that award students for outstanding academic or extracurricular achievements. When applying to merit scholarships, you should distinguish yourself from other students by highlighting your GPA , academic goals, or highly impactful service to your community. For these scholarship opportunities, the higher your achievements, the better.

Student-specific scholarships : these prizes reward students for various reasons related to their personal characteristics. for example, numerous scholarship competitions exist for students based on gender, race, religion, ethnicity, and much more. these prizes can be diverse, so do your research and show the scholarship committee that you best reflect what they are looking for., brand scholarships : these awards are offered by businesses or corporations. oftentimes, winners of these prizes are posted on the website of the scholarship provider. because of this, you’ll want to communicate something unique or compelling about yourself. simply stating that you’re a good student likely won’t do the trick here because the brand will want to celebrate a student with an interesting story., demonstrating your uniqueness.

Now that you know a little about how to research what scholarship providers may be looking for, there’s one piece of advice that works for almost every single scholarship prize out there: be unique!

It’s a lot easier said than done, but without question, every single student has a story worth telling. The thing is, you have to own who you are. In other words, be sincere, authentic, and real.

If you grew up going on a lot of camping trips and learning survival skills, tell that story. How does it help you succeed in college or university and in your career?

If you grew up facing difficult personal circumstances, tell that story. Again, how does this help you in your career?

Where You’ve Been or Where You’re Going

If, after a ton of self-analysis, you still can’t think of a story to tell, then focus on where you’re going. Tell a scholarship provider about your career goals and show them that winning their prize will help you do something major in your professional life. Maybe an investment in you will help drive some large impact in the future. If this is the case, share this story. This could be a great way to demonstrate why you deserve this scholarship.

Ultimately, you must show a scholarship committee that your story and goals fit with the mission of their prize. In other words, show them why you’ll be a great ambassador of this scholarship opportunity.

Why You Deserve This Scholarship Essay Examples

Here are a couple of sample introductions that show you how you can frame an essay to win scholarships . Keep in mind that the question is “why you deserve this scholarship,” so your essay should be about you . Applying for this scholarship requires you to combine the scholarship’s mandate with your personal story. Here are some introductions to help you frame your winning scholarship essay questions:

Introduction Example One: A Scholarship Resume That Shines

Last winter, my high school administration made the decision to cancel all after school programs because of budget cuts. This action robbed students of necessary skill development and important community participation that comes along with extracurriculars. I couldn’t let this happen. In response, I wrote a letter to my school board and city council. It received thousands of signatures. While it took nearly three months, this advocacy was central to having after school programs reinstated in my high school. I believe that my community service, leadership, and perseverance closely align with the ABC Scholarship’s stated values. For this reason, I know I would be a great ambassador of the prize.

Introduction Example Two: An Investment in Your Potential

When someone looks at my academic and extracurricular achievements so far, they may call me average. However, this would be a mistake. People often underestimate me because I’m quiet, but what they don’t see on the surface is my great ambition. My goal is to completely change the way we think about [insert anything you’re passionate about here]. For this reason, winning the ABC Scholarship prize wouldn’t just help me, but anyone who has ever encountered [whatever the problem is that you’re working toward]. This is why I deserve this scholarship and how I plan to use the prize money for positive change.

“Why you deserve this scholarship” essays should be authentic, personal, and always free of grammatical errors. Always ensure that you pay careful attention to the scholarship requirements on the scholarship website. Note important details like word count, exact essay question(s), and any other scholarship application items desired by the selection committee.

Finally, whether you’re a graduating high school student, undergraduate, or graduate student, apply for college and university scholarships now! There are many “deserve this scholarship” questions out there, and now you know what committees look for. Writing these winning scholarship essays could help you overcome the major stress that comes along with paying for higher education. Don’t wait! You’ve got this!  

Christopher Grafos, Ph.D., is the founder and chief scholarship mentor at BridgesEDU Scholarships.

He’s a first-generation university graduate whose life was transformed by education and winning scholarships. 

Scholarships help students financially, but they also help advance a student’s career. It’s his life’s work to champion this message and share the secrets to finding and winning scholarships. 

Read more about Christopher’s journey here . 

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How to Write a “Why This College” Essay (With Example!)

Varonika Ware is a content writer at Scholarships360. Varonika earned her undergraduate degree in Mass Communications at Louisiana State University. During her time at LSU, she worked with the Center of Academic Success to create the weekly Success Sunday newsletter. Varonika also interned at the Louisiana Department of Insurance in the Public Affairs office with some of her graphics appearing in local news articles.

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Bill Jack has over a decade of experience in college admissions and financial aid. Since 2008, he has worked at Colby College, Wesleyan University, University of Maine at Farmington, and Bates College.

Maria Geiger is Director of Content at Scholarships360. She is a former online educational technology instructor and adjunct writing instructor. In addition to education reform, Maria’s interests include viewpoint diversity, blended/flipped learning, digital communication, and integrating media/web tools into the curriculum to better facilitate student engagement. Maria earned both a B.A. and an M.A. in English Literature from Monmouth University, an M. Ed. in Education from Monmouth University, and a Virtual Online Teaching Certificate (VOLT) from the University of Pennsylvania.

Applying to college is a big decision that brings a lot of excitement and stress. This is especially true when it comes to answering the “why this college” prompt asked by so many colleges. However daunting these prompts might seem, you got this. Keep reading to learn tips and tricks to write your “why this college” essay, and take a look at an example essay!

“Why this college?” essay prompts 

The “Why this college?” essay is probably one of the most common essays you’ll come across during your application process. This is partially because admissions committees want students that’re as interested and passionate about their institution. Some popular colleges that offer “why this college?” prompts include:

• Columbia University : “Why are you interested in attending Columbia University? We encourage you to consider the aspect(s) that you find unique and compelling about Columbia. (150 words or fewer)
• Duke University : “What is your sense of Duke as a university and a community, and why do you consider it a good match for you? If there is something in particular about our offerings that attracts you, feel free to share that as well. (max. 250 words)”
• University of Michigan : “Describe the unique qualities that attract you to the specific undergraduate College or School to which you are applying at the University of Michigan. How would that curriculum support your interests?” (Minimum: 100 words/Maximum: 550 words)

As you can see, all three of the prompts are a variation of the basic “why this college” question. Let’s take a look at a sample response essay written for Columbia University. 

“Why this college?” sample essay

Dear Columbia University, 

This is probably the hundredth essay you’ve read in the sea of applicants, and as you’re likely expecting, I could tell you that I’m different from them all. Though in some ways, I’m the same. Like them, I want to stand on the corner of Broadway and 116th St. and know I chose the perfect school to study literary arts with a focus on fiction writing. 

Even more so, I strive to be one of the Columbia Greats that inspired me to pick up a pen. Though, you shouldn’t want me because I might be the next Allen Ginsberg, but because I plan on being a writer that captures the virtue found in the rye of J.D. Salinger, the watchful gaze of Zora Neale Hurston, and the freshness of my own style. Amongst your walls and tutelage, these literary greats blossomed, as I hope to.

Applicant Name

Why this essay works:

• Starts with a compelling statement to interest the audience
• Answers the “why this college?” question by discussing notable alumni and the arts program
• Uses a unique approach to the prompt question that reflects interest in the major of choice
• Explains why the admissions committee should choose this applicant
• Stays within the word count limit

Also see: How to respond to this year’s Common App essay prompts

Mistakes to avoid when writing a “why this college” essay

Generalizing.

When writing any essay, generalizing usually isn’t the way to go. Readers want to get invested in the story or argument you’re presenting, and the admissions office is no different. Details are a key component of making your essay stand out. 

The admissions committee wants to get to know you and assess how you’ll fit into their institution. No two applicants are the same, and you should strive to prove that through your unique essay. 

Placating the admissions office

It can be easy to fall back on simply telling your college’s admissions committee what they want to hear. However, you shouldn’t just pull facts and figures from the website or quote the college’s brochure. Individualize your essay not only to capture the attention of your reader, but to display interest in your college of choice.

Anyone can put general information in their application, but it takes effort to explain why you want to attend a particular school, how admission would affect your life, and what the school has to gain from your attendance. Think of it as a persuasive essay where you have to back up your argument with details. 

Also see: An insider’s perspective into what goes on in college admissions offices

Tips for writing your essay

Find a connection.

Even before you start writing your essay, figure out the connection between you and your college of choice. 

Is there a particular professor you want to study under? Are you a legacy applicant? Is it the campus of your dreams? Are you excited for a particular program? 

Asking yourself questions like this can help pinpoint what’s motivating you to apply to a university and why they should admit you. Explaining your connection to your school of choice can show the admissions committee that you belong on their campus. 

It will strengthen your application and help you individualize your application. Create an interesting or anecdotal story out of your connection in order to set yourself apart.

Also see: How to write an essay about yourself

Outline and edit

College essays usually range from around 200 – 500 words, which can go by much quicker than you might think. This is why it’s ideal to outline your essay once you’ve decided what to write about. It can be easy to get distracted by the little details, but emphasize the main points that are essential to the story you’re trying to tell the admissions office. 

It’s also a good idea to thoroughly read and edit your essay multiple times. You’ll want to submit the complete and final version of your essay, not something that reads like a rough draft. 

Remember, your parents, advisors, teachers, and peers can be helpful resources during revision. Feedback is an important aspect of the editing process.

Additional resources

Congratulations on starting your applications to college and working so diligently on them! Fortunately, Scholarships360 has even more resources to offer that can help propel your college journey in the right direction. 

• Start choosing your major
• Find the supplemental essay guide for your college
• Learn what “demonstrated interest” means for your application

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How to Write a Scholarship Essay about Why You Deserve It + Scholarship Essay Samples

A scholarship essay is one of the most important essays you might have written in your life! No wonder your own budget depends on how successful it is! But we are not here to make you even more worried about this task. This article by Custom-Writing experts can help you make the writing process as easy as it can be.

The thing is that there may be other students with the same grades and achievements as you, so you need to stand out if you want that scholarship. In this case, you need to focus on explaining why you are the one who deserves it!

• 👣 Writing Steps
• 👌 Writing Tips

🔗 References

👣 how to write a scholarship essay step by step.

There are only a few tips to keep in mind when you are to write your financial assistance essay .

• Start early . It must be the most challenging part. However, you absolutely need to make sure you have enough time for every next step of the process. So try to start earlier than you usually do (preferably not on the due day).
• Research everything you can about the scholarship provider . All of them are looking for different candidates. Check their overall mission and if it fits you, think about how you can highlight your best traits according to it in your essay.
• Always check and follow the requirements . Make sure you understand every step in the instructions for submitting your essay. You don’t want to lose those thousands of dollars of the scholarship just because you didn’t pay attention to the requirements!
• Choose more optimistic topics . Even if you’ve been through hard times, try to focus on the positive sides. Write about how you managed to overcome those obstacles and what that experience has taught you. It sets the right mood and presents you from the best side!
• You are allowed to get personal . Don’t be afraid to share something about what makes you an individual. It appears to be one of the best strategies when it comes to scholarship essays. Not only this approach highlights your personality; it makes your writing unique and gives a chance for the committee to know who you really are. It improves the chances they will remember you!
• Don’t be shy to ask for advice . Getting some feedback from your mentors, teachers, and peers can be extremely helpful and valuable. You shouldn’t miss a chance to improve.
• Never skip proofreading and grammar check! If you think it doesn’t really matter, think twice! Some admission committees wouldn’t even read past the first grammar mistake they find! Besides, it can really distract from the central message of your essay. Take some time and double-check everything before submitting it.
• It’s not time to give up yet! You can feel tired and frustrated, but it’s completely normal. All you need is to take a break, have a nap, and come back to the writing process with a fresh head full of ideas! Don’t let the burnout catch you!

💡 Scholarship Essay Topics

First, you should choose an appropriate topic to illustrate your unique qualities (unless the committee has already selected it for you). Talk about anything that you think can make you stand out among the other applicants for this scholarship.

• Challenges you overcame . It’s considered one of the best topics for a scholarship essay! This way, you honestly talk about tough times and explain what you learned from those obstacles. Such an experience is always valued.
• Write about your background . You may choose to describe anything that shows off your personality. Try to come up with something that you feel like your CV is incomplete without. The committee respects honesty and is always glad to make a connection with you!
• Explain how you solved a problem. Such an essay is supposed to demonstrate your way of thinking. Explain why the problem was so essential and add some details about your thought process. It’s another excellent way for the admission committee to get to know you!
• Challenging an idea . Note, this topic is about your perspective! So talk about the time when something made you reevaluate your beliefs and ideas. It’s always useful to show that you are mature and open-minded enough to admit you were wrong and change your point of view.
• Your main passion . Write about a hobby or a topic that you care about so much that you can lose track of time while consumed by it. Being curious is one of the best qualities for a student!
• Talk about your personal growth . If there was an event or an experience that made a profound change in your life, go for it! Describe how it shaped your views and identity.
• Free topic . Sometimes, it happens that the committee would give you a chance to write about anything you want! It’s important to remember that the main point of a scholarship essay is to show your true self.
• The significance of that scholarship for you . Here, you have a chance to explain why you are the best match for this funding. Be honest and don’t show off too much. In this essay, your grades are not the most important.
• Your favorite book . Once again, it’s all to show your personality. Don’t write it in the form of a review, though. Explain why the book became so personal to you and what it reveals about you.
• Write about someone you admire . Try to avoid cliché personalities. You should write about someone who genuinely changed your views or behavior. They don’t necessarily have to be worldwide famous.

📑 Scholarship Essay Format

Once you’ve selected the topic and established your goal, you need to outline the story you’re about to tell. Without a well-thought-out plan, it will be challenging to keep the narration logical and straightforward and avoid getting lost in your thoughts.

A standard scholarship essay format can be similar to that of a five-paragraph essay with an introduction, a three-paragraph body, and a conclusion.

Scholarship Essay Introduction

The introduction is the face of your paper. Capturing the committee’s interest is the only way to get them engaged in your story. And once you do that, you’ll have every chance to receive your scholarship.

• Make your introduction brief, informative, and descriptive.
• Don’t use long sentences in your scholarship essay introduction. You may leave that for other parts of your essay.
• Be optimistic. Think about your attitude. You like people who have a positive point of view. The same thing works with the committee.

Scholarship Essay Body

The body is the paper’s part that has all the “meat.” It contains the main argument. The body paragraphs should include the information on your life, accomplishments, and plans for the future—anything that the committee might find engaging and persuasive.

• Provide as many details as possible to your story. Make it compelling, captivating, and convincing.
• Don’t be impersonal. It’s all about you. And it’s not only the story itself that should focus on you. It’s even better if you can add a couple of personal touches to your writing style, too.
• Don’t complain. Remember that strong personalities struggle and avoid whining. You also have to keep a positive attitude. Even if your story describes sad events, it’s an excellent opportunity to show how you managed to deal with them.

Scholarship Essay Conclusion

In this part of the essay, you’ll stress your story’s significance and why it’s necessary to give the scholarship to you.

There is only one main rule for the conclusion — don’t try to sum everything up . Your scholarship essay is short as it is. So, there is nothing to go over and review, as the memory is still fresh. To write a proper scholarship essay conclusion, just put extra emphasis on your story’s points that you consider to be the most important.

👌 Scholarship Essay Tips

A great, well-considered story about yourself is only one part of your scholarship essay’s success. What’s the other? It’s your language and the vocabulary you use.

You have to choose your words carefully, as they can make a significant impact on your essay’s overall success. Here are three core principles you can follow to filter out the wrong words:

• Sincerity. ‘A good candidate’ and ‘well-prepared’ is much better than ‘fantastic background’ and ‘exceptional skills.’
• Positive views. ‘Well-prepared’ can be a good substitute for ‘struggling academically.’
• Conciseness. Delete ‘very,’ ‘strongly’ and ‘literally’ from your papers and try to find more substantial one-word synonyms, instead.

At the same time, don’t try to show off your vocabulary just for its sake. Instead, use it as a tool to help you craft your story that will earn you that scholarship. After getting into the right mindset, try using the following words to brighten up your vocabulary.

Furthermore, moreover, similarly, what’s more, likewise, as well as, coupled with, to say nothing of, not to mention

In other words, in order to, to that end, that is to say, to put it another way

Yet, then again, that said, on the other hand, by contrast, however, in comparison, having said that

Importantly, significantly, notably

In light of, despite this, provided that, given, with this in mind, nevertheless, nonetheless, notwithstanding

All things considered, in conclusion, compelling, above all

👀 Scholarship Essay Samples

Of course, no amount of theory can compare to a nicely composed scholarship essay example. Instead of reading endless tips and suggestions and trying to remember all that information, take a look at an already-written work. It’ll give you an idea of what the finished essay should look like.

We couldn’t deprive you of this excellent opportunity. So, we’ve decided to provide you with several sources to find these examples. They will give you a clearer understanding of how you should approach the writing of your scholarship essay.

• Scholarship paper examples (Custom-Writing.org) . On this page, you can find three examples based on the top best topics! Those ideas are proven to be the most successful when it comes to receiving the scholarship. You can also find some comments about every example and a small Q&A section to help you understand the details!
• Scholarship essay samples (UW-Madison) . A couple of great downloadable examples of scholarship essays from one of the best colleges in the US! Moreover, they offer some writing tips that you can’t miss. It’s not easy to get into such a quality private college and get financial aid, so you should use all the help they offer!
• Scholarship essay examples (San Diego State University) . San Diego State University also appears to be quite generous and gives you a chance to look through four essay examples and ideas. Since it’s not easy to get into this university either, you should pay attention to what they consider the best writings!

Scholarship Essay FAQ

There is no universal way to answer this question. Some winners list 10 reasons why they should receive the scholarship. Others only mention 2 or 3. The thing is that the overall text needs to be persuasive , impressive , and sincere .

If you answer this question in the form of an essay, you need to explain why you need assistance. Make sure to do it in a logically structured way. In the body, list a minimum of 2-3 supportive arguments. Then add an appropriate introduction and a conclusion.

If you are wondering what colleges look for, imagine yourself a member of the applications commission. What would you look for in a student? Perhaps, a strong motivation , a clear vision, self-sufficiency, stress-resistance, etc.

If not through such essays, how should commissions get to know the applicants? A scholarship essay should explain to the college why the applicant deserves this assistance. It needs to be well-structured, without mistakes and misprints. It should also be comfortable and exciting to read.

• Writing a Winning College Scholarship Essay: The Princeton Review
• Tips for Writing an Effective Application Essay: College Board
• How To Write a Scholarship Essay: Maryville University
• How to Write a Winning Scholarship Essay: Top Universities
• 5 Ways to Make Your Scholarship Essay Stand Out: US News
• Introductions: The Writing Center, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill
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Thank you, Custom-Writing, you just saved me a whole 2 hours; now that you’ve given me a focus, I’ll spend less time on my scholarship essay.

Exactly what I wanted. Great.

This is excellent advice on writing my “Why I Need This Scholarship” essay, and I used it when I worked on my assignment. Really helpful blog!

Thanks. They really helpful

Thank you very much for these articles. Please, can you help me proofread my essays? I would be very grateful if you can help me. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sound ideas on writing “Why I Need This Scholarship” essays. They are the key to writing a good scholarship essay and getting financial aid!

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How to Write a Stellar “Why This College?” Essay + Examples

What’s covered:, sample “why this college” prompts, faqs about the “why this college” essay.

• Common Mistakes to Avoid

Good “Why This College?” Essay Examples

• Brainstorming for this Essay
• Outlining Your Essay
• Where to Get Your Essay Edited

One of the most common college essay supplements will ask you to answer the question: “Why This College?” These essays are looking to see whether you’re a good fit for the campus community, and whether the college is a good fit for you and your goals. 

In this post, we’ll show you a couple examples of these prompts, go over good and bad sample responses, and break down how to ensure yours is one of the good ones. 

Let’s start by taking a look at real prompts that fit under the “Why This College?” archetype: 

Tufts: Which aspects of the Tufts undergraduate experience prompt your application? In short, ‘Why Tufts?’ (150 words)

Northwestern: Other parts of your application give us a sense for how you might contribute to Northwestern. But we also want to consider how Northwestern will contribute to your interests and goals. Help us understand what aspects of Northwestern appeal most to you, and how you’ll make use of specific resources and opportunities here. (300 words)

As you can see, these prompts are basically asking why you want to attend the school in question. Northwestern spells it out even further, and specifically asks how you’ll use their resources to achieve your goals.

Both prompts have word counts that are much shorter than that of the Common App, which is typical of supplemental essays. These two word counts are pretty representative, and you can expect the “Why This College?” essay length to be 100-400 words on average. That’s not a lot of space for a pretty important question, so it’s especially vital to use the word count wisely.

What are colleges looking for in the “Why Us” essay?

Colleges want to admit students who will not only enroll (to protect their yield), but also thrive on their campus. They ask this question to see whether you’re truly interested in the school and whether it’s the right place for you. You can write a strong response by citing specific ways the college can support your goals, as well as demonstrating your enthusiasm.

Which colleges have a “Why This College?” essay?

This is one of the most popular supplements among colleges. Here is a selection of top schools that ask this question:

• Northwestern
• Boston University
• University of Michigan

Check out our essay guides for these schools for more in-depth advice on how to write these essays.

What kind of writing style should I use?

This is a straightforward question that generally has a short word count, so you don’t need to use a narrative form at all. You can simply explain what you like about the school and why, but try to use varied sentence structure and organize the essay around your major goals. 

You can start your essay with a story if you want, however. For example, if you visited campus and experienced a really interesting course, or sat in on a meeting of a club you liked, this can make for a strong anecdote to begin your essay. Just make sure that whatever story you tell has some substance, and isn’t just a narration of how nice it was to walk around campus.

Can I copy and paste my essay for other schools?

Absolutely not. If your essay is general enough to apply to other schools, you know you need to rewrite it. The resources you mention should be highly specific to the college you’re writing about.

Common Mistakes When Writing the “Why This College?” Essay

The most common mistake students make is listing generic characteristics that could apply to any school. This negatively impacts your application, since it sends the message that you didn’t do your research, and aren’t truly interested in the school.

Here’s an example of something NOT to list in your “Why this college essay.” We’ll take the example of Tufts since we shared the prompt in the beginning.

What NOT to write: I’m applying to Tufts because of its low student to faculty ratio, the strong math department, and its prime location in Medford, just a hop away from Boston. When I visited campus, the school already felt like home.

This example is bad because many schools have low student to faculty ratios and strong math departments. There are also a ton of schools in or near Boston, many of which have low student to faculty ratios and great math departments too, such as Boston College, Harvard, Northeastern, Boston University, etc. If your statements can apply to other schools, that’s definitely not a good sign (avoid things like location, weather, size, and ranking).

The student also uses an emotional appeal with the line “it felt like home,” which might sound nice, but it has no substance and can be written for any school. You should definitely avoid making any statements like these.

This example shows that the student really hasn’t thought much about their fit with Tufts, and that it probably isn’t their top choice. This will impact your application negatively, especially since Tufts is known for taking applicants’ demonstrated interest more seriously than other schools . So, if you show that you show little interest through your essay, you may end up waitlisted or rejected, even if your stats are excellent.

Another thing that this example gets wrong is that it doesn’t describe the student’s goals or interests at all. It’s important to not only talk about why you picked the school, but also how exactly those aspects will help you grow. Remember, this kind of prompt is two-fold: in addition to explaining why the school is a good fit for you, you want to show why you, out of the many thousands of applicants they get each year, are a good fit for them.

To summarize, the main mistakes to avoid are:

• Citing generic aspects of the school (location, weather, size, and ranking)
• Using empty emotional appeals
• Not describing your goals and interests

Now that we know what a bad example might look like, here’s an example of a rewrite to part of the Tufts essay:

What TO write: As a potential Applied Mathematics major, I hope to gain the tools to model political behavior. I’m especially interested in elections, and am looking forward to taking the course “Mathematics of Social Choice,” as the centerpiece of Social Choice Theory is voting. I would also love to take “Nonlinear Dynamics and Chaos,” because it will teach me to use differential equations to predict chaotic behavior. 

This is a good example, as the courses listed are highly-specific to Tufts, as well as the student’s professional goals. We not only learned something about Tufts, but also the student. Keep in mind that this wouldn’t be a complete essay⁠—it’s just an example of good, specific resources to list, and how to connect them to your own interests. 

If you want an example of a complete essay, here’s this real student response for Boston University’s “Why This College?” prompt.

Prompt: In no more than 250 words, please tell us why BU is a good fit for you and what

specifically has led you to apply for admission.

Boston University’s College of Arts and Sciences (CAS) attracts me because of its support of interdisciplinary study among its wide array of majors. In fact, the CAS now offers a course that combines biology, chemistry, and neuroscience. As I hope to conduct medical research into brain disorders, I plan to pursue all three areas of study. These cross-disciplinary connections at BU will prepare me to do so.

CAS’s undergraduate research program would allow me to work with a mentor, such as Dr. Alice Cronin-Golomb or Dr. Robert M.G. Reinhart related to their research on neurological disorders. With them, I can advance the work I have already completed related to Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). In a summer class at our local university, my partner and I extracted data from fMRI and PET studies and inputted them into a coding program. We then created an indicator map, which we imported into another software program, AFNI, to display significant activity in the brain regions affected by DID. Seeing the representation of our data thrilled me because I knew it could eventually help people who live with DID. I want to experience that feeling again. Successfully analyzing these fMRI and PET studies and learning to code drives me to pursue more research opportunities, and this desire motivates me to study at a university that offers research opportunities to undergraduates. BU’s interdisciplinary approach to psychology and support for independent undergraduate undergraduate research will optimally prepare me for a career as a neurological researcher.

This student clearly outlines BU-specific resources (the interdisciplinary course and undergrad research program), plus how these resources align with their professional goals (to become a neurological researcher). They do “name-drop” professors, but since their work clearly relates to the student’s interests, it doesn’t look disingenuous, and shows that the student has done research on their fit with BU. The student also provides background on why they want to pursue research, and shows that they already have experience, which makes their interest in the undergrad research program more concrete.

The only thing missing from this essay is the student’s fit with BU in terms of extracurriculars and social life. “Why This College?” essays should also cover extracurriculars, as the residential college experience is about more than just class and homework. Admissions officers are also interested in how you’ll contribute to their broader campus community.

In general, these essays should be academic-leaning (especially if they’re under 250 words), but you should still address some social aspects of the college that appeal to you (we recommend about 70% academics, 30% social, with more or less focus on social aspects depending on the word count). Since the student probably already detailed their previous research in their Common App activities section, they could’ve just summarized their research background in one sentence, and used the space saved to talk about a specific social aspect of BU that interests them.

Here’s another sample essay, but for UPenn. This essay’s word count was much longer, so the student was able to really hone in on several specific aspects of UPenn.

Prompt: How will you explore your intellectual and academic interests at the University of Pennsylvania? Please answer this question given the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying (650 words).

Sister Simone Roach, a theorist of nursing ethics, said, “caring is the human mode of being.” I have long been inspired by Sister Roach’s Five C’s of Caring: commitment, conscience, competence, compassion, and confidence. Penn both embraces and fosters these values through a rigorous, interdisciplinary curriculum and unmatched access to service and volunteer opportunities.

COMMITMENT. Reading through the activities that Penn Quakers devote their time to (in addition to academics!) felt like drinking from a firehose in the best possible way. As a prospective nursing student with interests outside of my major, I value this level of flexibility. I plan to leverage Penn’s liberal arts curriculum to gain an in-depth understanding of the challenges LGBT people face, especially regarding healthcare access. Through courses like “Interactional Processes with LGBT Individuals” and volunteering at the Mazzoni Center for outreach, I hope to learn how to better support the Penn LGBT community as well as my family and friends, including my cousin, who came out as trans last year.

CONSCIENCE. As one of the first people in my family to attend a four-year university, I wanted a school that promoted a sense of moral responsibility among its students. At Penn, professors challenge their students to question and recreate their own set of morals by sparking thought- provoking, open-minded discussions. I can imagine myself advocating for universal healthcare in courses such as “Health Care Reform & Future of American Health System” and debating its merits with my peers. Studying in an environment where students confidently voice their opinions – conservative or liberal – will push me to question and strengthen my value system.

COMPETENCE. Two aspects that drew my attention to Penn’s BSN program were its high-quality research opportunities and hands-on nursing projects. Through its Office of Nursing Research, Penn connects students to faculty members who share similar research interests. As I volunteered at a nursing home in high school, I hope to work with Dr. Carthon to improve the quality of care for senior citizens. Seniors, especially minorities, face serious barriers to healthcare that I want to resolve. Additionally, Penn’s unique use of simulations to bridge the gap between classroom learning and real-world application impressed me. Using computerized manikins that mimic human responses, classes in Penn’s nursing program allow students to apply their emergency medical skills in a mass casualty simulation and monitor their actions afterward through a video system. Participating in this activity will help me identify my strengths and areas for improvement regarding crisis management and medical care in a controlled yet realistic setting. Research opportunities and simulations will develop my skills even before I interact with patients.

COMPASSION. I value giving back through community service, and I have a particular interest in Penn’s Community Champions and Nursing Students For Sexual & Reproductive Health (NSRH). As a four-year volunteer health educator, I hope to continue this work as a Community Champions member. I am excited to collaborate with medical students to teach fourth and fifth graders in the city about cardiology or lead a chair dance class for the elders at the LIFE Center. Furthermore, as a feminist who firmly believes in women’s abortion rights, I’d like to join NSRH in order to advocate for women’s health on campus. At Penn, I can work with like-minded people to make a meaningful difference.

CONFIDENCE. All of the Quakers that I have met possess one defining trait: confidence. Each student summarized their experiences at Penn as challenging but fulfilling. Although I expect my coursework to push me, from my conversations with current Quakers I know it will help me to be far more effective in my career.

The Five C’s of Caring are important heuristics for nursing, but they also provide insight into how I want to approach my time in college. I am eager to engage with these principles both as a nurse and as a Penn Quaker, and I can’t wait to start.

This student takes a creative approach to the essay, by using the Five C’s of Caring as a framework. This technique works especially well since these qualities relate to the student’s future career in nursing. In addition to emphasizing the student’s creativity and passion for nursing, having the Five C’s in all caps at the start of each paragraph gives this long essay a clear, easy-to-read format.

What really makes the essay stand out is the depth of the student’s fit with UPenn, and how they’re able to also share more about who they are. The student lists specific courses, research opportunities, technology, and student groups. We also learn that they are a first-generation student, are passionate about increasing access to healthcare (particularly for LGBTQ+ people, minorities, and the elderly), care about health education, and are a feminist who staunchly defends abortion rights (this controversial topic could be risky, but since UPenn is a very liberal school, this should be fine).

Overall, this essay paints a vivid picture of how the student would engage academically at Penn, and we also see clearly how the student would pursue their intellectual passions outside the classroom. Since this essay prompt focused on “intellectual and academic interests,” there was no need to address other aspects of UPenn beyond those supporting their various interests in healthcare.

See more “ Why This College?” essay examples to understand what makes a strong response.

Brainstorming for the “Why This College?” Essay

Now that we’ve gone through a couple examples, you might be wondering how to get started yourself. 

Here are three steps we recommend to get your essay underway:

• Reflect on your academic and career goals
• Research unique opportunities related to your academic and extracurricular interests
• Pick your top academic reasons for applying, and your top extracurricular/social reasons

1. Reflect on your academic and career goals.

The driver behind this essay needs to be you , and not the school itself. Anyone can write nice things about the college, but only you can explain why you would be a good fit for it.

Ask yourself:

• What do you want to major in, if you know? If you’re undecided, what are the subjects you’re interested in?
• Which career do you want to pursue, or what are the potential options?
• What do you want to get out of college? Any particular skills or experiences?

Once you have a clear idea of your college plan, then you can dig into how the college can support your plan.

2. Research unique opportunities related to your academic, career, and extracurricular interests.

You might be wondering where you can find all these specific courses, clubs, and other resources. The school’s website is a good place to start, or if you have a general idea of what you’re looking for, you can even use Google with the school name in your search, such as “Tufts orchestra.” 

Take a look at the website of your department/major and dig into the courses, fellowships, internships, and other resources. For course syllabi, you can visit the website of the professor who’s teaching the course; they’ll often post more detailed information than the online course catalog, including readings and concepts to be covered.

Clubs may have their own websites, but you can also try to find their Facebook groups or Instagram pages, which might be more current and even show events they’re hosting⁠.

If you can, try to speak with a current student. Your school counselor may be able to connect you with one, or you can also reach out to the admissions office to see if they can connect you. If not, speaking with an admissions officer is also great, or you can try to find day-in-the-life videos on YouTube.

3. Pick your top academic reasons for applying, and your top extracurricular/social reasons.

Once you’ve done your research and found specific opportunities to cite in your essay, pick your top 1-3 academic reasons and top 1-3 extracurricular ones, depending on the word count. Going back to the Tufts essay, the good example we gave actually was already 65 words, and it was only able to mention two courses. 

Keep in mind that you not only have to describe resources specific to the school, but also how they’ll contribute to your goals. This personal aspect is just as important as the actual opportunities, so be sure to allot space to describe why exactly these resources make the school a good fit for you.

When it comes to academic reasons, you are free to list anything from special programs to unique majors to specific courses and professors. We want to caution you against “name-dropping” professors, however⁠—unless their work actually fits with your established interests and professional goals. Otherwise, it might seem like you’re being disingenuous.

We also want to reiterate that you should be sure to not only talk about academics in your essay, but also extracurriculars (unless the prompt asks you to focus only on academics, or if the word count is unusually short, i.e. 150 words or fewer). Again, college isn’t just about what you do in the classroom. Admissions committees want to be sure that accepted students will also contribute to the college community. 

Outlining Your “Why This College?” Essay

Once you’ve identified your goals and the resources to support them, it’s time to start writing. An easy format/outline for your essay would be:

• Introduction to your main goals and the why behind them (great spot for an anecdote). 
• Your first goal and how the school can support it.
• Your second goal and how the school can support it.
• Conclusion where you look towards the future and reaffirm how the college can get you there.

You can adjust the length of the essay by adding or subtracting the number of goals you write about. As noted above, r emember to include extracurriculars when sharing how the college can support your goals. You should plan to spend about 70% of your space on academic reasons, and 30% on extracurricular reasons.

Some students choose to use a more unconventional format, like the Five C’s of Caring essay above, and that works too if you want to show off your creative writing skills. Some examples include a letter to the school or a schedule of your day as a student at the college. These unconventional formats can be harder to pull off though, so only go that route if you’re confident in your writing. The letter format can be especially tricky since it’s easy to sound cheesy and overenthusiastic.

Regardless of the format you choose, remember these two things that your essay should do. It should:

• Reveal more about your goals and interests.
• D escribe how the school can help you develop your interests and reach your goals, by naming highly-specific and unique campus resources, both academic and extracurricular.

If your essay checks both of those boxes, you’re well on your way to making your candidacy more compelling to admissions officers!

Where to Get Your “Why This College?” Essay Edited

Do you want feedback on your “Why This College?” essays? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

I need some advice on ideas - "Why do I deserve the scholarship"

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 17, 2009   #2 From what you've said so far, the two things that might make you stand out are taking care of your grandmother and using knowledge finance as a means of contributing to your country. Might you be interested in taking your education in finance into a job in public policy, government, or an NGO? If so, say so.

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 17, 2009   #3 Simone is right -- you should focus heavily on what you plan to do with your degree, how you plan to contribute to society, etc. You might also talk about how you would contribute to the university environment as well. Also, is the scholarship based purely on merit, or is it based partially on need, too? If the latter, you will have to explain why you need the scholarship more than other applicants. If it's only merit-based, though, then stick with focusing on how good of a student you are, and how much you have already contributed to your community, and plan to contribute more both at university and after graduation.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 17, 2009   #4 Thank you. I'm gonna write the complete essay and would you mind checking it for me later? However I'm having some trouble finding the best way to express my ideas as I'm afraid that they may sound a little showing off By the way I'd like to ask you a question: Should I mention something about my character? One of my friend said that I should focus on that rather than on my studying process

zowzow 10 / 175   Jun 17, 2009   #5 i would recommend that you do mention stuff about your character. your studying process is not why you deserve the scholarship but its you. little showing off shouldnt be a problem because you're pretty much selling yourself for this scholarship. just give it a go and we'll check it for ya

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 17, 2009   #6 You are suppose to show off shamelessly in this sort of essay. You are selling yourself, remember. You can talk about your character, but if you do, use anecdotes to show your positive qualities, rather than just telling the reader about them generally.

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 18, 2009   #8 I don't think you can be precluded from posting new threads -- at least, I don't know of any option the moderators have that would keep you as a member while stopping you from starting new threads. The only thing I could think of would be if you had posted a lot of new threads without commenting on anyone else's work, but you are very active on the site, so that shouldn't be a problem. What error message do you get when you try to create a new thread?

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 18, 2009   #9 I'm gonna write the complete essay and would you mind checking it for me later? Yes, please do post your draft for comments when you are ready for feedback.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 19, 2009   #10 This is the complete essay. Please check it and comment. As many other graduated high school students, I have to come to the most important decision of my life: choosing a suitable place to further my education. Through the years, especially my last three years in high school, I had the opportunity to discover my passions and then came up with the awareness of my professional goals. My special interest in mathematics and the influence from my friends, particularly from my brother were the reasons why I decided to pursue finance as my career. Attending RMIT University will help me to actualize the desire to succeed in my future life. The idea of continuing my study in RMIT University dates back to 2004, when my father heard about the establishment of the first international university in Hanoi. This led to my thought of being trained in a totally different study environment, where I could enjoy high-level curriculum system while still being able to stay in my hometown to take care of my parents and especially my grandmother. With fervent support from my family and my friends, I decided that I would enroll in RMIT University. Having spent quite a lot of time learning about the university, it could be assumed that its reputation for teaching qualities and modern facilities are among numerous reasons for my determination. Obviously, it is an ideal place that satisfies my hope of enjoying the best studying conditions in my country. The desire to train in RMIT University was the motivation for me to study so hard on English during high school time, which led to my 7.5 IELTS band score. This result gives me certainty that I have no trouble communicating and I could follow the lectures seamlessly. Furthermore, I have the ability to acquire knowledge quite quickly. Having been working tirelessly on mathematics since secondary school gives me a logical mind and an independent way of thinking. These would be advantages for my studying process in the future. I have been studying really hard during my 12 years in school so I believe that I'm qualified for the scholarship. Recently, I have paid more attention to learn about my favorite field in order to gain more academic knowledge as well as to be more certain about choosing it as my future profession. I'm well aware of what I want and I have confidence that attending RMIT University will give me a chance to pursue my dream. I hope that after finishing my course, I would be able to apply for a good job then accumulate wealth. Knowing that finance and commerce have massively contributed to the society, I eagerly want to be a part of it. I had great time doing my volunteer work in Vinh Phuc province. Working there helped me partially understand how indigently that many Vietnamese people have to live. Hopefully, in the future I would have the opportunity to donate a part of my fortune to help improve the poor's lives. It is a long way to realize my dream, and it certainly will be another long way to go to actualize it. I was always anxious that the family's budget would cause me some difficulties carrying out my determination. That makes the scholarship even more significant to me. If I am given the scholarship, I can further my education without having to worry about my family financial problem, and more important, I can stand a better chance to do what I want, which is to take a step closer to success. Again, I'm not really satisfied with it. Even myself after reading the complete essay, I can hardly find something call "original" or "outstanding". Anyways, please read and give me your comments. I really need your help. Thank you very much.

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 19, 2009   #11 Even myself after reading the complete essay, I can hardly find something call "original" or "outstanding". Right: It's a solid essay by a strong candidate but not particularly engaging or unique. Look at your first words: "As many other graduated high school students..." Right away, you are telling the reader, "I am just like everybody else." What can you start with instead? What does make you stand out from the crowd? You've not got enough of your personality in this essay for me to even offer a suggestion. In the introduction, and throughout, let us see your personality. Are you always so serious, so much so that other people joke about that, or do you have a playful sense of humor? You mention caring for your grandmother. Do you have an especially close relationship with her? Is caring for others important to you? How do your friends and family members describe you? I'm not saying you should put all of this in your essay directly, but answering such questions might help you to see what aspects of yourself to put into the essay.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 19, 2009   #12 Thank you. I really appreciate your comments. My friends said that it would be extremely good if I mentioned something about my character, but I find it really difficult to think of a way to express those ideas seamlessly. I'll try to revise it and please check it again for me later (:

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 19, 2009   #13 Maybe your friends will have some ideas about what, specifically, you can say about your character or, even better, what story about you best illustrates your character.

sound10kp 5 / 12   Jun 19, 2009   #14 I think your examples are great and I think your essay will definitely persuade them. Good luck to you! :)

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 19, 2009   #15 Ok. I've just got some new ideas. It's a true story about how I studied Math, because I used to hate it, even for a long time I was scared of it. But after a lot of things happened, I realized how interesting Math was and I became massively interested in it. Maybe it's just another mediocre idea but at least I think it's better than what I wrote above. I hope that I could find the best way to express it, so from my essay the readers can understand something about my personality. At least I can be optimistic that if I start with this idea, I won't have to list everything about me in a very boring way (: And this may take quite a long time, so hopefully you guys could wait for it. What do you think about this idea? Thanks for your comments. Another question: Can I tell a story instead of writing this essay in the normal format? @sound10kp: Thank you for your comments (:. However, I think I need to do something different to catch the recruiters' eyes.

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 19, 2009   #16 You could start with the anecdote you suggested -- whether it ends up being mediocre or not will depend on your writing skills. Here is an alternative approach: 1. Delete your first paragraph (often a good idea, and the first thing many people should do after finishing a draft) 2. Rewrite the first part of your second paragraph (which is now your introduction) to turn what you have written now into a narrative anecdote that shows you coming to your decision, rather than telling us about how your father apparently made the decision for you. You might find that this works better for you, as you will be working with ideas already in your essay, instead of adding something a bit new to the beginning. This should in theory give you a stronger flow to your writing.

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 19, 2009   #17 I like the idea of narrating the decision process. However, I still think that something additional is needed to make the essay stand out from the crowd. I like the anecdote about initially hating math as an introduction. Why don't you at least try writing that and then we can see if it works.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 20, 2009   #18 Thank you. I've been working on it. It may take about 4 or 5 days, hope that you don't mind waiting :( I've been thinking about using some kind of proverbs or quotes like "nothing is impossible", etc., something like that, as the first sentence. Anyways, I don't like my first essay so I'll try to write it all over again (:

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 20, 2009   #19 That's fine. Starting fresh can often be beneficial. Certainly, we will wait however long you need us to to review your next draft.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 23, 2009   #20 This is my next draft: ... Please read and comment. And it exceeded 600 words :( Could you help me to shorten it? Thanks a lot.

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 23, 2009   #21 Let's get rid of some of these weak verbs, especially since doing so will cut down the length. Instead of "I am especially interested in mathematics" (6 words), say "Mathematics especially interests me" (4 words). Instead of "This is what I could never confidently declare until some yeas ago" (12 words), say "Now I can confidently declare that" (6 words). You try it! Any time you start a sentence or phrase with "it is" or "it was," figure out how to say the same thing in fewer words with a stronger verb.

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 23, 2009   #22 In fact, get rid of every single form of "to be" you can, regardless of where it appears in the sentence. Then target other weak verbs, such as "to have," "to do," "to make," "to use," etc.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 23, 2009   #24 Here is my new draft, 600 words exactly. I tried to get rid of as many forms of "to be" as I could. Hope that you can help me more to better it. "Nothing is impossible" - Perhaps everyone knows this famous statement, but not everyone believes that it is true. Looking back, I never thought that I could do the so-called "impossible", but such things unfailingly happen in a lifetime and I cannot flee from them forever. Once I decided to confront impossibility in my studying and surmounted it, and most important, I would never have discovered my passion without that decision. Mathematics especially interests me - now I could confidently declare that. I used to rule myself out of all math periods. In the past, math, to me, was unnecessarily difficult and impractical. I disliked it, even for a long time I was so frightened of it that at times I thought that in the future I would not do any mathematics-related job. Everything changed since we had our math teacher altered. Her strictness compelled me to pay more attention to her lectures and at the very same time math started to attract me. "You have the aptitude for this subject. Don't waste it" - the new teacher said the words that nobody had ever done to me. Thanks to that encouragement, I finally determined on learning math. My last year in secondary school allowed me to understand how wrong I was to hate math for such a long time. As I went to high school, studying got harder, especially mathematics - a real challenge that I needed to overcome. Math became my number one priority among all subjects, and the more industriously I worked on it, the more I fell in love with it. "Practice makes perfect" - my endeavor paid off since I got good results for my math tests. But I did not get enough. A used-to-be math-unrelated student like me found it difficult to integrate whereas a competitive environment like my class was not a place for a pimping turtle. That was why once I decided to come out of my shell by presenting my own answer to a math exercise in front of the whole class. Although I solved it wrong and felt so embarrassed that everyone would laugh at me, I did not give up. I tried to do that again and again whenever I found a different solution to the exercise given, and I succeeded eventually. Step by step, I did not feel shy to give out my ideas anymore. Throughout 3 years studying tirelessly, I caught my teachers' eyes and earned respect from my fellows. "I made it" - finally I could be proud to have done something that no-one, even myself, had expected. At age 16, I discovered my professional goals. My special interest in math and the influence from my brother soon turned into the decision to pursue finance field. Recently, I have paid more attention to learn about finance to gain more academic knowledge as well as to be more certain about choosing it as my career. A long time researching led to the desire to enroll in RMIT University, which gave me the motivation to study English assiduously to get 7.5 IELTS band score. This, along with logical and independent way of thinking earned from studying math could give me some advantages for my future studying process. I have confidence that attending RMIT University will help me pursue my dream. It was a long way to realize my dream, and it will certainly be a long way to make it happen. The scholarship will give me an opportunity to further my education without having to worry about my family financial problem, and above all, a chance to take a step closer to success. Please give me your straight comments. Thank you

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 24, 2009   #25 Oh, this is so much stronger! I disliked it ; even for a long time I was so frightened of it that at times I thought that in the future I c ould not do any mathematics-related job.

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 24, 2009   #26 You're getting there. A few more suggestions: "Looking back, I never thought that I could do the so-called "impossible", but such things unfailingly happen in a lifetime and I cannot flee from them forever. Once I decided to confront impossibility in my studying and surmounted it, and most important, I would never have discovered my passion without that decision." This is a tad vague. Can you replace the generalities will specific examples of obstacles you overcame? "Everything changed since we had our math teacher altered." This is sort of scary. You had your math teacher altered? What, did you implant a chip in her brain? I know what you mean, but you have to rephrase. "A used-to-be math-unrelated student like me found it difficult to integrate whereas a competitive environment like my class was not a place for a pimping turtle." Now rewrite this using half the words and a clearer grammatical structure.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 26, 2009   #27 Sorry my internet got disconnected yesterday Thanks for your suggestion. I'll think about it and post my latest draft tomorrow (: The thing is I find it a bit difficult to rephrase the sentence "Everything since we had our teacher altered". Could you give me some more suggestion? Thanks (:

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 26, 2009   #28 find it a bit difficult to rephrase the sentence "Everything since we had our teacher altered". Could you give me some more suggestion? It's difficult for me to rephrase too, because I don't quite know what you mean. Everything changed when we got a new teacher?

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 26, 2009   #29 Everything changed when we got a new teacher? That's what I assumed he meant, though it is unfortunately the least interesting interpretation of his original phrasing :)

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 27, 2009   #30 Yes that's defenitely what I meant. First I had trouble finding the best way to express my idea and then I came up with that, although I wasn't satisfied at all ): And btw, I'm "she", not "he" :D

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 27, 2009   #31 Oops. Sorry about that -- I'm used to thinking of "o" endings to names as masculine, and "a" endings as feminine, but of course that isn't true across all cultures.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 29, 2009   #32 Oh it's ok. Fiyero is not my real name anyway, so you don't have to apologize :D

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 29, 2009   #33 Where'd you take the handle from anyway? Gregory Maguire's novel?

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 30, 2009   #34 Actually, from a play called "Wicked". Fiyero is the name of my favorite character (:

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jun 30, 2009   #35 The play was conceived from the novel. If you like the play so much, you would probably enjoy the book even more.

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jun 30, 2009   #36 I started reading the novel a while back. Couldn't get into it, though, which is unusual for me -- normally if a book is any good at all, I won't stop reading it until I get to the end, even if I really should be doing something else.

OP Fiyero 1 / 13   Jun 30, 2009   #37 Honestly, I haven't read the book yet. Seems like it isn't published in my country. I just watched the play once and I think it's a good musical theatre (:

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jul 1, 2009   #38 It's a very quirky work of fiction. If you like it, you love it. But if it doesn't seize you, you set it down. If you liked the musical enough to choose a character's name for your forum name, I suspect you'd love the novel. It's available used via internet even if it wasn't published in your country.

EF_Sean 6 / 3481   Jul 1, 2009   #39 Maybe I'll give the novel another chance, just so I can add more to this discussion later.

EF_Simone 2 / 1985   Jul 1, 2009   #40 From what I know of you, I'm not surprised you didn't like it the first time and suspect you won't like it again. On the other hand, it can sometimes be fun to read outside of one's preferences, as (paradoxically) one's distance from the work sometimes allows one to see what about it is compelling to to others.

No matter how thoughtful and empathetic you try to be, you’ve probably hurt or offended someone you really care about. Maybe you accidentally let a private detail about your best friend’s health struggle slip during a group hang, or you snooped through your partner’s phone , completely shaking their trust. After messing up, it’s natural to want to make things right—but what’s the best way to actually earn that all-important “it’s okay”?

The reality is, “you can't make someone forgive you,” Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT , author of I Want This to Work , tells SELF. Even if you fall all over yourself apologizing and take accountability for your actions, “forgiveness comes from the other person,” Earnshaw says—and there are plenty of reasons why someone might not be ready to let bygones be bygones. They may need time to process what happened or perhaps they’re not convinced your “sorry” is genuine.

While you can’t force forgiveness, you can take meaningful steps to earn it. According to the experts we spoke with, these are some of the best ways to redeem yourself—and get whoever you offended to move past your slipup.

1. Don’t view apologizing as a sign of weakness.

If you struggle to admit when you did something wrong, that makes a lot of sense. Acknowledging that you were a shitty friend or significant other, for instance, can bring up uncomfortable emotions many of us would prefer to avoid—such as guilt, shame, or embarrassment.

However, if you see owning up to your mistakes as a blow to your ego, this mindset will only hold you back and prevent you from being a better pal, partner, and overall person, Nelly Seo, PsyD , a psychologist at Therapists of New York, tells SELF. Instead, try to reframe the act of taking responsibility as an opportunity for growth.

“It requires emotional strength and a lot of self-awareness to trade in your pride and admit you messed up,” Dr. Seo says. And ultimately, this perspective shift can make it easier to be more honest, remorseful, and vulnerable—without the defensiveness or blame-shifting that might ruin your chances of returning to your loved one’s good graces.

2. Be specific about what you’re sorry for.

A declaration of sorrow isn’t always enough. “A good apology includes a clear understanding of what exactly you did to hurt the person and shows some sense of remorse,” Earnshaw says.

If you were super late to a close friend’s birthday party, a brief “sorry again for last night” text the next morning doesn’t convey that you truly get their disappointment. Instead, express your regret and validate their feelings with something like, “I’m so sorry I wasn’t on time. I know this party meant a lot to you and it’s been planned for months, and I completely get why you’re mad at me.” Or, “I should have told you sooner that I was running late, and I feel horrible about letting you down.”

Basically, don’t just admit you did something wrong; admit you did something wrong to them . The more personal and detailed you are, the more it shows you’ve carefully reflected on the situation—which Earnshaw says will make your apology more meaningful (and more likely to be taken seriously).

3. Explain why you did what you did without making excuses.

Especially if you didn’t mean to hurt their feelings, it’s easy to slip into defense mode and start justifying your shitty actions. It wasn’t my fault I was late—work was crazy! I didn’t mean to say [insert insensitive comment]—I was just drunk!

To be fair, adding context for why you did what you did can help clear things up. But sometimes it can also come across like you’re deflecting responsibility, Dr. Seo warns. (Think about it: Are you truly taking accountability if your priority is to explain away your bad behavior?) That’s why, when you’re giving reasons for what happened, it’s important not to let them overshadow how your actions affected the other person.

With the example above, if you missed part of your pal’s big day due to a last-second work obligation, it’s okay to mention that—just don’t use it as an excuse to sidestep how disappointed they felt. Or say, after a few cocktails, you joked about how bad your body looks in front of a sibling who’s struggled with disordered eating : You can add that you weren’t in the best state of mind—while also addressing how deeply inconsiderate your comment was. “The point is to acknowledge how your mistake hurt them, rather than assuming your explanation alone can make everything okay and absolve you of responsibility,” Dr. Seo says.

4. Describe what you’ll do to prevent this from happening again—and actually follow through.

Words alone can only do so much. If you’re talking the talk but aren’t taking real steps to fix the issue, your apology (no matter how heartfelt) won’t carry much weight—which is why it’s helpful to outline how you intend to change. (In other words, what will you do from this point on? How will you prevent similar slipups from happening again?)

Instead of just promising your partner that you’ll stop snapping at them whenever family-related stress gets to you, come prepared with a few concrete steps you’ll take (like requesting 15 minutes of alone time to cool off, for example). Or, to make sure you never forget a friend’s important moments (like birthdays or big doctor’s appointments) again, commit to adding those events to your calendar—and set reminders to notify you too. That way “you’re showing the other person you’re serious about not hurting them again,” Earnshaw says, which is a solid step toward rebuilding trust and gaining their forgiveness.

5. If they need space, let them know you’re ready to give it.

“You shouldn’t expect to be forgiven,” Earnshaw says. (Remember: Apologizing is your part, but accepting it is theirs.) Not only can it be annoying and overwhelming, but “putting pressure on someone might send a message that you only apologized to get what you wanted (forgiveness) rather than to genuinely right your wrong,” she adds.

Of course, it’s natural to want to check in and see where they’re at. A better idea than bugging them for updates, though, is simply asking if they need space, Dr. Seo says. You could also say something like, “I know I've been apologizing a lot, so I’ll give you some time to process everything. I don’t want you to think I'm abandoning you; I just want to respect your needs.” By stepping back, you’re letting them work through their pain at their own pace, which they’ll probably appreciate more than a flood of “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

6. Know that there’s a chance they won’t forgive you—and try to accept it.

Even if you do everything “right” and follow all of the advice above to a T, it’s possible that the person you hurt won’t ever forgive you—or even if they do, they may not want you back in their life. As heartbreaking as that outcome can be, though, you owe it to yourself to not let it jumpstart a never-ending cycle of self-blame and regret.

“No one is perfect, and we’re all bound to make mistakes that sometimes have big consequences,” Dr. Seo says. “What’s important is finding a way to accept that and, when you’re emotionally ready, focus on what you can learn from this experience.” Maybe that looks like reflecting on what it means to be a more reliable, trustworthy friend for your existing connections, or adopting healthier ways to manage your anger . As long as you’re committed to growing from your missteps, both therapists agree you’re on the path to doing better in the future—and forgiving yourself .

• 3 Things to Say When a ‘Friend’ Puts You Down
• How to Build Your Confidence So You Can Have the Life You Deserve
• 5 Signs That You’re in a One-Sided Friendship

Get more of SELF's great mental health advice delivered right to your inbox—for free .

SELF does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Any information published on this website or by this brand is not intended as a substitute for medical advice, and you should not take any action before consulting with a healthcare professional.