essay about taking care of ourselves

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Jen Ashley is a writer living in Charleston, South Carolina who seeks to find the humor and humanity in all things. Yes, Ashley is her last name.

Taking Care of Ourselves

By jen ashley.

This essay has an associated podcast episode. Listen now .

My friends know me as ‘Jen’, but marketing agencies know me as ‘a mid-20s American woman.’ I am the target demographic for those shilling self-care products, and I am bombarded with ads for them constantly. If they knew me a little better, though, they might realize that no essential oil diffuser in the world could calm these ever-fraught nerves, and even if it could, I wouldn’t be able to afford it.

The term ‘self-care’ took off in the late 2010s as a means to combat the growing trend of burnout. At the heart of the concept was self preservation . It wasn’t about fixing your problems, it was about coping with them: “Your life sucks. Treat yourself to 10 minutes of meditation, or a manicure!”

Newsletters and blogs devoted to self-care started springing up. The faces of stylish, beautiful women in the bylines tell us in gentle, feminine tones that we should buy that sponsored eucalyptus candle or vegan yoga mat as if that will satisfy our growing desperation for peace.

Search the hashtag #selfcare on Instagram, for instance. In between pastel graphics featuring inspirational quotes, you’re bound to find numerous product posts: alternative medicine, moisturizers, crystals, throw pillows, detoxifying teas and low-calorie ice creams. “We can make you feel a little better,” the brands promise, “ for a price. ”

After a year filled with fear, loss, sickness, change, and uncertainty, the need to address my own physical and mental wellbeing reached an all-time high. I wasn’t happy, and I could no longer believe the lie, “If I can just get through this week , my schedule will start clearing up.” I realized I too had a need for self-care, but the online discussion around it felt less like a resource and more like a marketplace oversaturated with overpriced hokum.

Self-care may have started out as a good faith movement for combating burnout, but it has grown into a $450 billion industry that preys upon those who are burnt out. But if life is so hard for so many people, imagine how much harder it must be for those who can’t afford to pamper ourselves with $100 facials? Aren’t they, too, deserving of self-care? And if so, where does it leave them?

Maybe we shouldn’t be listening to the marketers who tell us that we are too old, too ugly, or too imperfect, and that we need to be fixed. Maybe we should listen to ourselves instead.

Should we purchase blue light glasses to protect our eyes from the excessive screen time, or should we quit scrolling our timelines? Should we download a freemium meditation app, or should we take a walk outside? Are we practicing self-care, or have we lost our sense of self?

One evening recently, I was feeling particularly exhausted. All I wanted to do was sit on my sofa and pretend that I did not exist. When I, shoeless, stepped on a spill on the floor, I seriously considered returning to the couch with dirty bare feet. Instead, I forced myself to go to the tub and wash them. It sounds odd, but the quiet and solitary act of washing my own feet felt incredibly therapeutic. It occurred to me that maybe what I was doing was, technically, self-care.

When reflecting more on the concept, I realized I’d been framing it the wrong way – starting with the very term. I began to put intention not into ‘self-care’, but ‘taking care of myself.’ Simply by making it an active phrase rather than an ambiguous term, it instantly became less like an impulsive purchase or an elitist indulgence and more like a necessity.

It is a mantra. When I feel a sense of dread sweeping over me at the thought of doing the laundry, or flossing my teeth, or responding to an email, I now think: “By doing this, I am taking care of myself.” It doesn’t necessarily make these tasks enjoyable, but it does give me a sense of mindfulness.

While self-care is a reactionary measure, taking care of myself is a lifestyle. I no longer make to-do lists for the day, where work deadlines are prioritized above all else. Instead, I make a schedule that incorporates an even mixture of chores, work and self. Lunch breaks are just as important as a mandatory Zoom call. My career will not end if I opt to take a 20-minute walk over a doom-scroll through my inbox – and if that was actually a possibility, would I really want that career?

I challenge you to stop thinking that life is inevitably stressful and that your only option is to take the occasional vacation or book a quarterly massage to patch up your feelings of burnout. You can still book that yoga retreat or buy that candle if you can afford it, but you should think of those purchases as treats, not band-aids. Your wellbeing is not a commodity. Take care of yourself.

A tall Victorian at the end of the line for the J-Church streetcar was home to The Integral Counseling Center. I caught the streetcar a block from my apartment on that most rare of things in San Francisco, flat ground, and rode the car as it lurched around the curves up a very steep grade.

There is no magic deeper than re-telling a story, for you are giving yourself agency to assign meaning and (most importantly) to assign usefulness to time and events. When fairytale writer Hans Christian Andersen wrote, “Our lives are fairytales written by God’s fingers,” it was not just a cute ditty— it was a magic healing spell. 

Self-care has never been more important

Clinicians, researchers, professors and other psychologists need to continue to prioritize self-care

Vol. 51, No. 5 Print version: page 60

Even with the first few months of the COVID-19 pandemic behind us, psychologists, like the rest of the world, are still adjusting to a new normal: working from home, managing child care, worrying about older family members and wondering what comes next. “We have all of these concerns ourselves, and then we have to also provide support as our patients struggle with them, too,” says Heather Gebhardt, PhD, of the Veterans Affairs (VA) Puget Sound Health Care System in Seattle.

Whether you’re a clinician, a researcher or an educator, how can you care for yourself during this stressful time? “By doing all the things we recommend to our patients,” says Gebhardt. She and other psychologists offer this advice:

Prioritize. Make a plan of action by listing your work and personal priorities and then deciding what can be delegated and what can be postponed, says Laura Boxley, PhD, of The Ohio State University. Be sure to add self-care to your schedule, she adds. “In stressful times, self-care can seem frivolous or selfish,” she says. “But committing to self-care will preserve your ability to rise to the challenge of this time.”

Pivot, if necessary. For researchers, university shutdowns don’t have to mean that work grinds to a halt. “Lots of labs are nimble,” says Jeff Zacks, PhD, of Washington University in St. Louis. “If we can’t collect data face-to-face, we can work on other things that are often pushed to the back burner, such as data analysis and writing.”

Stick to a routine. “I still pack my lunch every day and put on work clothes even if I’m not going into the office,” says Gebhardt. “Still doing those r­­outines gives a sense of normalcy to the otherwise abnormal situation we’re in.”

Create a separate workspace. “Working from home can blur the boundaries between work and your personal life so that you feel you’re working all the time,” says Nathaly Shoua-Desmarais, PsyD, of Florida International University. “I could be on the computer 24/7 now.” Create a separate workspace if possible, even if that means setting up a desk in a corner of your living room with your back to the larger space, she suggests. Keep your sleeping area as personal space, she adds.

Don’t skimp on the basics. Eating healthy food, getting enough sleep and being active are foundations of good self-care, says Vaile Wright, PhD, APA’s senior director of health care innovation. If you can get outside, take a walk or go for a run. But there’s plenty you can do inside. “People are posting workouts on social media and hosting exercise classes on Zoom or FaceTime,” says Gebhardt. Ask your gym or yoga studio if they’re offering virtual sessions or look for workouts on YouTube.

Stay connected. While psychologists often worry about excessive screen time, online technologies like Zoom, Skype and Google Hangouts are helping people stay connected despite being physically isolated. “It’s such a breath of fresh air to be able to see people and laugh with them,” says Gebhardt, who recently enjoyed a “family Zoom date” with relatives from around the world. “I’ve been blown away by how social distancing can make a community come together.”

Limit news consumption. Checking the news or social media constantly or having the news on in the background only causes unnecessary distress, says Shoua-Desmarais. Decide how much time you’re going to devote to checking reliable sources and then stick to that limit, even if you have to ask a friend to serve as an accountability partner and check up on whether you followed through with your commitment. For Shoua-Desmarais, that means spending five minutes scanning the news in the morning and another five minutes before doing pre-bedtime relaxation exercises.

Be mindful of substance use. You may be using alcohol or other substances to temporarily relieve boredom or stress, says Wright. “Be mindful of the slippery slope,” she says. “And obviously avoid it if you’ve had any problems in the past.” The same holds true for eating, she adds. “A little ice cream feels good,” she points out. “A whole pint usually doesn’t.”

Practice mindfulness and other relaxation techniques. “Mindfulness activities can be helpful for dealing with anxiety,” says Richelle Concepcion, PsyD, MPH, of Tripler Army Medical Center in Honolulu. “Meditation, yoga, even mindful breathing are ways to slow things down.” And there are plenty of free resources, including autogenic training on YouTube, the apps Breathe2Relax and Tactical Breather from PsyberGuide, and Mindfulness Coach and other resources available from the VA App Store . Headspace and Ten Percent Happier , two apps that normally charge a fee, are offering free access to health-care providers during the pandemic.

Learn something new. Now is a good time to burnish your professional skills, says Bethany A. Teachman, PhD, a professor of clinical psychology at the University of Virginia. “This is a good opportunity to build your skill set virtually,” she says, citing as one example taking an online statistics course. Use this time for continuing-education courses or other professional development, suggests Concepcion. If you’ve had to go virtual professionally, for instance, check out the offerings on APA’s telepsychology resources page . Or just engage in self-enrichment. Another free resource is Coursera’s “ The Science of Well-Being ,” a course created by Yale psychology professor Laurie Santos, PhD, and touted as “Yale’s most popular class ever.” These online resources are a good way to distract yourself from the news and keep yourself engaged in learning, says Concepcion.

Cut yourself some slack. “It’s important to be kind to others—and to ourselves,” says Teachman. Keep in mind that in abnormal times like these, you’re not going to be as productive as you were before and that’s OK, she says.

Watch for signs of trouble in yourself . Even after the crisis eases, you may be at risk of burnout or even post-traumatic stress disorder, says Wright. “Stay attuned to your body,” she suggests, explaining that many people first experience mental health symptoms as physical symptoms, such as muscle tension, a clenched jaw, increased heart rate or chest pressure. “Your body is trying to tell you something’s up.” Other signs of burnout include irritability, a lack of empathy or an inability to connect with patients, students, research participants or others. If you’re experiencing warning signs or finding yourself unable to work or take care of yourself or your family, it may be time to seek help from another psychologist, says Wright. She advises reaching out as soon as you feel yourself slipping. “Don’t wait until you’re in a crisis,” she says.

Check in with colleagues, too. Keep an eye on struggling colleagues and let them know you’re also struggling as a way of normalizing their reactions. And find meaning in helping others. “There’s not enough yoga in the world to deal with the magnitude of what we’re coping with right now,” says Boxley. “We have to think flexibly about self-care: It’s not just about taking care of ourselves but about taking care of others.”

APA Services, Inc. Self-Care Resources

APA’s Self-Care Resource Center

Staying In and Staying Healthy: Insights for Positive Mental Health in Graduate School James, B.T., The Behavioral Neuroscientist and Comparative Psychologist , 2019

Contact APA

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What Is Self-Care and Why Is It Important?

4 Ways to Practice Self-Care

What Is Self-Care?

• Building a Self-Care Plan

Self-care is the practice of taking care of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual aspects of your life to promote health and wellness.

While many people may view self-care as a form of selfish indulgence, the act of caring for oneself is an important part of a person's overall well-being.

Many people do not fully understand what self-care means. Read on to find out more about what self-care is, examples of practicing self-care, and why it’s important for your mental and physical health.

Maskot / Getty Images

According to the World Health Organization (WHO), self-care is being able to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a healthcare provider.

The WHO also mentions that self-care is a broad term and many facets of a person’s life come into play, including:

• Hygiene (general and personal)
• Lifestyle factors such as exercise level and leisure activities
• Environmental factors such as a person’s living conditions or social habits
• Socioeconomic factors such as a person’s income level or cultural beliefs
• Self-medication and following treatment plans for current illnesses

The main goal of self-care is to prevent or control disease and preserve overall well-being through consistently taking care of various aspects of your health.

For a person to practice true self-care, they must use personal responsibility and self-reliance in a way that positively impacts their health in the current moment and the future.

Overindulgence in spending

Binge-eating your favorite but unhealthy foods

Participating in activities that provide instant gratification

Going on expensive and lavish vacations

Perfecting oneself by any means necessary

Numbing bad feelings using alcohol or illicit substances

Binge-watching television

Prioritizing one's physical and mental health

Adopting healthy lifestyle habits that can be maintained long-term

Eating a healthy diet

Finding exercise activities that you enjoy and participating in them regularly

Getting an adequate amount of good-quality sleep

Following treatment plans for existing conditions accordingly

Taking time out for yourself to participate in healthy activities you enjoy

What Types of Self-Care Are There?

Various forms of self-care involve different activities or actions. Each form is as important as the other and drives optimal health and well-being.

Physical Health

Taking care of your physical health is a form of self-care that helps improve quality of life and prevent or manage chronic conditions.

Physical self-care will be different for each person, but ways you can practice physical self-care include:

• Getting the proper amount of exercise
• Eating regular, well-balanced meals that are mostly whole foods and staying hydrated
• Engaging in relaxing activities that can help manage stress
• Getting enough sleep
• Getting regular medical and dental care

Mental Health

Mental self-care is designed to drive a healthy mind by practicing brain-stimulating activities and healthy mental behaviors. Mental self-care can help you manage stress, lower your risk of illness, and increase your energy.

While no two people are the same, these strategies can help you manage stress and stimulate your mind:

• Use relaxation programs or apps regularly to incorporate meditation, yoga, muscle relaxation, or breathing exercises. 
• Practice gratitude by reminding yourself daily of things you are grateful for. Write them down at night or replay them in your mind.
• Participate in creative activities you enjoy.
• Read a book or do a puzzle.
• Play games such as Scrabble, crossword puzzles, or other brain teasers.
• Try a new hobby.
• Engage in exercise.
• Take adult education classes.
• Seek help from a professional as needed.

Relationships

Having healthy relationships is a form of social self-care all its own. Research has shown that different forms of relationships, whether they be romantic, platonic, or familial, can all benefit overall health and well-being.

On the flip side, not having healthy relationships can be detrimental to health. When people lack platonic relationships, they are more likely to be subject to psychological distress and engage in unhealthy behaviors.  

Ways to foster relationships include:

• Regularly scheduling get-togethers (coffee, a walk, a meal, going to the movies, or just hanging out) with friends or family members
• Connecting with community or faith-based groups
• Volunteering for a local organization
• Joining a local group, such as a hiking club, knitting group, or other interest group

Not everyone has a spiritual or religious need. However, for some people nurturing their spirit allows them to connect on a deeper level with themselves and to think beyond themselves.

Spiritual self-care practices might include:

• Hiking or spending time in nature
• Listening to inspirational music
• Going to church or attending virtual spiritual activities or groups
• Talking with a spiritual advisor

Why Is Self-Care Important?

Practicing self-care regularly can bring about both short- and long-term benefits that lead to improved well-being and an improved health status.

In the short term, people who practice self-care can see positive changes such as:

• Reduced stress levels : Putting your health and needs first along with giving yourself a bit of rest can significantly reduce stress levels.
• Increasing self-worth : The more you take care of yourself, the better you will feel about who you are as a person. This is because more of your core needs will be met on a regular basis.
• Feelings of belonging : A short-term benefit of spending time with others will provide feelings of belonging and love, which is good for your overall mental health.

While the short-term benefits of self-care are good, the long-term benefits are what self-care is more focused on. Some long-term benefits include:

• Managing chronic conditions: By practicing physical and mental self-care strategies, conditions such as depression, diabetes, and heart disease can be more effectively managed.
• Disease prevention: Implementing self-care practices, such as regular exercise, healthy eating, and stress management techniques, reduces the risk of heart attack , stroke , and obesity in the future.
• Stress reduction: Stress affects all systems in the body. Chronic stress can lead to chronic health conditions. Practicing self-care that reduces chronic stress can help lower the risk of developing health conditions, such as heart disease, high blood pressure, gastrointestinal disorders, and more.
• Healthier relationships: When taking better care of our personal needs, we are better able to engage in healthy relationships partially due to increased self-esteem and self-worth.
• Improved job satisfaction: A study of nurses found those who implemented intentional self-care practices had significantly higher job satisfaction. The authors suggest implementing self-care practices could improve job satisfaction and teamwork while reducing burnout.
• Reduced burnout: Authors of a review of multiple studies concluded the solution for burnout is complex, but self-care strategies are one of several components that could be effective.
• Improved quality of life: When self-care practices help to better manage health conditions, reduce stress, or create a greater sense of belonging, overall well-being and quality of life improve.

How to Practice Self-Care

Building your perfect self-care plan will depend on your personal health and lifestyle. To create a plan to encourage better health and well-being:

• Determine your overall level of health: Once you know your starting point health-wise, you can begin adding or subtracting certain activities or stressors in your life to focus on improving your health.
• Identify your stressors: Make a list of things that cause you stress in all aspects of your life. The next step is to do your best to avoid certain stressors. If they are unavoidable, teach yourself coping techniques that can help lessen your stress reaction to certain situations.
• Identify your coping strategies: Everyone develops strategies to cope with health issues, stress, and other life problems. Make a list of your coping strategies and see which ones are healthy and which ones aren’t. The unhealthy ones that don't serve you well can be swapped out for healthier coping mechanisms.

After completing these three steps, you can begin to formulate a plan that you can commit to.

Self-Care Strategies for People With Chronic Disease

If you have a chronic disease, your self-care plan may look a little different than that of someone who does not. This is only because you will have to incorporate certain activities that will benefit you. For example, if you have diabetes , ensure that coping strategies and activities you utilize as self-care help you manage your condition while you follow your treatment plan.

Self-care is the practice of taking care of the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual aspects of your life to promote health and wellness. It is a lifestyle that enables you to set aside time for your health to ensure your overall well-being now and for years to come.

If you do adopt the right techniques to care for yourself, you will be able to reap the benefits, such as better physical and mental health, the prevention or better management of disease, and better personal and workplace relationships.

World Health Organization. What do we mean by self-care?

National Institute of Mental Health. Caring for your mental health .

Holt-Lunstad J. Loneliness and Social Isolation as Risk Factors: The Power of Social Connection in Prevention . Am J Lifestyle Med. 2021 May 6;15(5):567-573. doi: 10.1177/15598276211009454

Kiecolt-Glaser JK, Wilson SJ. Lovesick: How Couples' Relationships Influence Health. Annu Rev Clin Psychol. 2017 May 8;13:421-443. doi:10.1146/annurev-clinpsy-032816-045111

David D, Dalton J, Magny-Normilus C, Brain MM, Linster T, Lee SJ. The Quality of Family Relationships, Diabetes Self-Care, and Health Outcomes in Older Adults. Diabetes Spectr. 2019 May;32(2):132-138. doi:10.2337/ds18-0039

Amati V, Meggiolaro S, Rivellini G, Zaccarin S. Social relations and life satisfaction: the role of friends. Genus. 2018;74(1):7. doi:10.1186/s41118-018-0032-z

Riegel B, Moser DK, Buck HG, et al. American Heart Association Council on Cardiovascular and Stroke Nursing; Council on Peripheral Vascular Disease; and Council on Quality of Care and Outcomes Research. Self-Care for the Prevention and Management of Cardiovascular Disease and Stroke: A Scientific Statement for Healthcare Professionals From the American Heart Association. J Am Heart Assoc. 2017 Aug 31;6(9):e006997. doi:10.1161/JAHA.117.006997

American Psychological Association. Stress effects on the body .

Monroe C, Loresto F, Horton-Deutsch S, et al. The value of intentional self-care practices: The effects of mindfulness on improving job satisfaction, teamwork, and workplace environments . Arch Psychiatr Nurs. 2021 Apr;35(2):189-194. doi: 10.1016/j.apnu.2020.10.003

Adnan NBB, Dafny HA, Baldwin C, Jakimowitz S, et al. What are the solutions for well-being and burn-out for healthcare professionals? An umbrella realist review of learnings of individual-focused interventions for critical care . BMJ Open. 2022 Sep 8;12(9):e060973. doi: 10.1136/bmjopen-2022-060973

California State University Department of Educational Psychology and Counseling. How to Create an Individualized Self-Care Plan.

By Angelica Bottaro Bottaro has a Bachelor of Science in Psychology and an Advanced Diploma in Journalism. She is based in Canada.

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A reflection on the importance of self-care

By Cecilia Vorfeld

This piece was originally a Voices column in The Johns Hopkins News-Letter .

Amongst all this chaos and high stress as the year kicks off, we should never forget to take care of ourselves first. No matter how important exams feel, your health is vital. It's no wonder the freshman plague coincides with midterm season every fall. You can hear the symphony of coughs and sneezes in large lecture halls, especially while everyone is furiously scribbling away during an exam.

I myself got incredibly sick before one of my Brain, Behavior and Cognition midterms freshman year. Needless to say, I completely bombed that exam as I felt so awful that I could barely read the questions. Thank goodness I could drop a midterm. This plague I was suffering was more down to stupidity, but it was also part of learning what it means to go to college and to find balance here at Hopkins.

I had decided to do a 24-hour sci-fi movie marathon, from 8 a.m. on Saturday to 8 a.m. on Sunday, with six new friends in my small Sylvester AMR I double (still hands down the best place to live freshman year, despite this horrific event — just saying).

As you can imagine, it did not end well. Seven people in one dark, small room, watching around 12 films one after the other, with only a few breaks and chips to sustain us —it was a recipe for disaster. Unsurprisingly I felt awful on Monday. I was dead. An absolute zombie. And yet I had a midterm on Tuesday morning which I needed to do. If only I had taken better care of myself.

Twenty four hours with no fresh air. That is a death sentence for sure. My freshman year self did not see how that was rather unhealthy of me, and so I want to encourage you all to learn from my mistakes.

Right now, the weather continues to be so beautiful. Soon enough fall will come with its rain and then the nights will get longer and winter will approach with its cold winds. Enjoy the sunshine while you can my friends! You could do this by getting coffee with a friend outside, reading on a quad or even working out — go for a run or walk around campus.

Personally, I try to exercise regularly, but when I don't manage my time well, it's the first thing that goes out the window. But when I do, it's always so worth it. It's a great way to process through whatever is stressing you out, feel those endorphins pumping and take a break from everything that is going on around you. I'll usually go first thing in the morning because at that point I am not even fully awake yet so I don't have time to think about what I need to get done.

By the evenings, my plate is so full, I can't seem to find time to make my way over to the Rec Center. Again, whatever works for you and your schedule is best, but if you haven't tried it out yet, I'd recommend it.

My second recommendation to you all, no matter how long you've been here, would be to get enough sleep. As an RA this year, I certainly witness residents staying up late into the night and I myself this past week have not been getting the sleep I need. It never ends well. Everything just seems so much harder when you're tired. I know I am a lot more irritable when I haven't had enough shuteye and any little thing that may never have annoyed me on a regular day, makes me want to burst into tears.

Of course, some people can function on less sleep than others, but I would encourage you all to make sure that you don't lose sleep because you left everything last minute.

Managing your time can really help make things better in the long run. I believe in taking time to relax and do things you enjoy, but don't do that in order to delay your work. Fit those treat-yourself-moments into your schedule.

I often will work with a friend so they can encourage me to get the worst over with, the assignment I keep putting off, the email I don't want to write. You've just got to rip off that band-aid. Then it's done. Leave it, and it becomes almost too late to the point that you have to sacrifice your sleep and get all stressed. People will say that there are not enough hours in the day, but there are exactly 24 hours each day for each of us, and I believe that we have total control over how we spend those hours.

Maybe I come from a very privileged perspective, but I think that if a class is too much, or a club you're in, or a job you work or the research you do, you have the power to change that. Very few things are absolutely necessary.

And if they are, then the stress you go through must be worth it or why do it at all. Know that you can always ask for help or alterations to create more balance in your life. As a senior, I feel that the more help I ask for, the more questions I ask, the more I use the resources available to us here at Hopkins, the happier I am and the more balance I have in my life.

I only have one more year here so I definitely want to max out on everything that is available to me, such as the extracurriculars I do. They are things that I get a huge amount of pleasure from and thoroughly enjoy. However sometimes I have to recognize that I need to set boundaries. I need to take care of myself first. There is nothing wrong with that. People are understanding.

Self-love is not selfish. You can't pour from an empty cup. Please remember that in the coming weeks and months here at Hopkins and make sure to put your own health and happiness first. You will make others around you healthier and happier too.

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To Take Care of Others, Start by Taking Care of Yourself

• Whitney Johnson

Most of us are not on the overtaxed frontlines of the healthcare battle, but all of us can be first responders to the need for emotional support. Almost everyone needs connection to others and the opportunity to give and get support right now. So, how can you shore up your mental health and deepen your own emotional reservoir? The author offers four suggestions: 1) Start with self-care. We can’t share with others a resource that we lack ourselves. 2) Ask for help when you need it. If you don’t ask for that support, the need for it will be revealed in ways that don’t serve you. 3) Ask others “How are you?” Take time to listen to their full answer and walk through your personal rollercoaster ride. 4) Look for the positive and say it aloud. Express appreciation, give compliments, and call out triumphs, no matter how small. If you see something good, speak up.

In these difficult times, we’ve made a number of our coronavirus articles free for all readers. To get all of HBR’s content delivered to your inbox, sign up for the Daily Alert newsletter.

As businesses and schools are shuttered, economic uncertainty encroaches, and a pandemic rages worldwide, there is plenty of anxiety to go around. We’re watching our healthcare system be pushed to its limits, but the grief and trauma we’re seeing presages a second wave of need: Before long, our mental healthcare system is going to be stretched to the breaking point as well. As physical distancing continues, we need to make sure that we help alleviate the isolation, loneliness , depression, anxiety, and other mental health impacts that will result, driving a potentially system-overwhelming curve of their own. And now is the time to head off this second crisis.

• WJ Whitney Johnson is the CEO of Disruption Advisors, a tech-enabled talent-development company and author of Smart Growth: How to Grow Your People to Grow Your Company .
• AH Amy Humble  is the co-founder and  President of Disruption Advisors ,  an executive coach, and  former ly  Chief of Staff to Jim Collins .

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What Is Self-Care, and Why Is It So Important for Your Health?

Self-care is all about looking after yourself. It means taking the time to tend to your physical, spiritual, mental, and emotional well-being. Practicing self-care is really important in itself, and it will enable you to help and care for others, work well, and do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day: in other words, be the best version of yourself.

Paula Gill Lopez, PhD , an associate professor in the department of psychological and educational consultation at Fairfield University in Fairfield, Connecticut, says the need for self-care is obvious. “We have an epidemic of anxiety and depression,” she says. “Everybody feels it.”

Self-care is part of the answer to how we can all better cope with daily stressors, explains Kelsey Patel , a Los Angeles–based wellness expert . It’s work stress, the stress of trying to keep up with the pace of daily life, which technology has hastened more than ever. “People are feeling lonelier and less able to unwind and slow down, which makes them feel more anxious and overwhelmed by even the simplest tasks,” Patel says.

Read on to learn more about self-care, including why it’s important, what it entails, and how it can benefit your overall health.

What Is Self-Care?

According to this definition, self-care includes everything related to staying physically healthy — including hygiene, nutrition, and medical care when needed. It’s all the steps you can take to manage the various stressors in your life and take care of your health and well-being.

Self-care does not mean the same thing for everyone. Different people will adopt different self-care practices, and even your own definition might change over time. “What is self-care for one person will likely differ from someone else, and what’s self-care for you one day might not feel like self-care another day,” says Marni Amsellem, PhD , a licensed psychologist based in the greater New York metropolitan area.

Regular self-care may help you put your best foot forward. “When we are regularly taking care of ourselves, we are better able to react to the things that go on in our lives,” Dr. Amsellem says. “It’s something we do to maintain positive well-being.”

As self-care has become more mainstream, the definitions have started to become more about general well-being and tend to focus on tuning in to one’s needs and meeting those needs. “Self-care is anything that you do for yourself that feels nourishing,” says Amsellem.

“That can be something that’s relaxing or calming, or it can be something that is intellectual or spiritual or physical or practical or something you need to get done,” she says.

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Types of self-care.

There are a few categories of self-care. The main areas it tends to include are physical, emotional and mental, and spiritual.

“Self-care could be anything that floats your boat — anything that puts a smile on your face,” Dr. Gill Lopez says. “Anything that makes you feel cared for, even if it’s you caring for yourself.”

Here are four of the main categories of self-care.

Emotional Self-Care

This includes all the things that help you relax and give yourself the time to decompress. It can include self-talk, weekly bubble baths, saying “no” to things that cause unnecessary stress. It can simply mean giving yourself permission to take a pause, or setting up a weekly coffee date with a friend. Perhaps it’s lighting some candles and listening to your favorite records, or reading a book in the garden. Whatever makes you feel happy, calm, and de-stressed.

Physical Self-Care

This could mean things like prioritizing sleep, and practicing good sleep hygiene . It might be adopting an exercise routine you can stick with, or choosing healthy and nourishing foods over highly processed ones.

Spiritual Self-Care

Spiritual self-care includes spending time in nature, meditating , or even just incorporating regular acts of kindness into your day. Some people choose to keep a gratitude journal , and if you practice organized religion, this could mean attending a service or ceremony as well.

Mental Self-Care

Mental self-care is also crucially important. It can mean doing things that keep the mind active and sharp, like learning a language, or a new and interesting subject. Puzzles and mind training games are also a great way to stimulate your mind and practice mental self-care. It can also involve practicing acceptance and improving self-love.

What Counts as Self-Care, and What Doesn’t?

There’s absolutely no exact science to self-care, because everyone has their own definition. The underlying rule is that it should be something that brings you sustained joy in the long run, Courtney says.

Though there are plenty of examples of self-care that seem to tread a fine line between a health-enhancing behavior and self-indulgence, self-care doesn’t have to be about padding your calendar with luxurious experiences or activities that cost money.

Consider a manicure or a massage or any other pampering activity. It might seem indulgent, but if the activity helps you de-stress and carve out time for yourself, it counts as self-care, Amsellem says. If weekly manicures or monthly spa days are beyond your means, they will likely add stress to your life in the long run, so there are plenty of other self-care practices you can adopt.

“Self-care does not have to cost anything — it’s just doing things you enjoy. And a lot of the things we enjoy or feel fulfilled from cost nothing,” Amsellem says. “Stepping outside and taking a deep breath, for example, might be the greatest act of self-care.”

Add Self-Care to Your Daily Routine

If you don’t have a lot of time, you can work acts of self-care into your daily routine. You can try being more mindful of your thoughts on your commute to work, or maybe you find ways to make daily tasks, like showering, more enjoyable. Pick a soap with a scent that you love, and focus on the physical sensations of the shower. What does your shower smell like? What does it sound like? How does the warm water feel on your skin? It’s about being mindful and present. “For about 10 minutes in the shower, which I have to do anyway, instead of letting my monkey brain run wild, I’m right there,” she says.

Daily chores like making your bed in the morning are also examples of self-care — or can be. “This is where that individuality comes into play, because for some people there is no way making a bed feels like self-care — it may just feel like a chore,” Amsellem says. But if it helps you claim your day and gives you a sense of accomplishment early on, you’ll have that with you even if the rest of the day gets derailed, Amsellem says.

How Self-Care Benefits Your Health and Well-Being

Many common self-care practices have been linked to longevity and other positive health outcomes, says Ellen K. Baker, PhD, a psychologist based in Washington, DC. There’s a lot of research, for example, showing that exercise, yoga, and mindfulness are supportive of mental and physical health, she says.

The following self-care practices have a strong, well-researched link to a longer life.

How to Start a Self-Care Routine

There are many ways to get started with a self-care routine . Determine which activities bring you joy, replenish your energy, and restore your balance. The following may provide a good starting point.

• Start small by choosing one behavior you’d like to incorporate into your routine in the next week.
• Build up to practicing that behavior every day for one week.
• Reflect on how you feel.
• Add more practices when ready.
• Get support through sharing practices with loved ones, a coach, a licensed professional (like a therapist or dietitian), or through your healthcare plan, community, or workplace.

Practicing self-care doesn’t need to be a heavy lift right out of the gate.

Here are a few ideas for activities that could help ease you into your self-care journey:

• Write in a journal.
• Start each day by paying attention to your breath for five minutes and setting intentions for the day.
• Eat breakfast.
• Reflect on what you’re grateful for each night.
• Put your phone on airplane mode for a half hour before bed each night to release yourself from the flurry of notifications.
• Call a friend just to say hello.
• Take up a relaxing hobby.
• Pick a bedtime, and stick to it.

Note: If you read this and feel a sense of demoralization or sadness from the challenges of mounting or establishing a self-care practice, it’s best to get help and support. There may be barriers to caring for yourself from past trauma, mental health issues, or family situations that may be making it more challenging to get started.

Seek support from trusted counselors and behavioral health providers (like a therapist), a trusted primary care doctor, or a close friend.

The Takeaway

Self-care means taking proactive steps to tend to your physical and emotional health, helping you cope with daily stress and improve overall well-being. It's not about self-indulgence, but activities that bring joy and help you feel balanced. Start small by incorporating daily practices that rejuvenate you, like mindful breathing or setting daily intentions.

Common Questions & Answers

Self-care is anything you do to take care of yourself so you can stay physically, mentally, and emotionally well. Its benefits are better physical, mental, and emotional health and well-being. Research suggests self-care promotes positive health outcomes, such as resilience, longevity, and better stress management.

Common examples of self-care include: a regular sleep routine, a healthy diet, spending time in nature, a hobby you enjoy, and expressions of gratitude. Self-care can look different for everyone, but to count as self-care, the behavior should promote health and happiness for you.

To get into a regular self-care routine, experts recommend starting small rather than tackling the most challenging thing first. Choose one practice each week to weave into your daily routine. Note any positive changes, and add in more practices when you feel ready.

Resources We Trust

• Cleveland Clinic: How to Start a Self-Care Routine
• Mayo Clinic: Self-Care Tips to Manage Mental Health and Wellness
• National Institute of Mental Health: Caring for Your Mental Health
• World Health Organization: Self-Care for Health and Well-Being
• Global Self-Care Foundation: What Is Self-Care?

Everyday Health follows strict sourcing guidelines to ensure the accuracy of its content, outlined in our editorial policy . We use only trustworthy sources, including peer-reviewed studies, board-certified medical experts, patients with lived experience, and information from top institutions.

• Self-Care for Health and Well-Being. World Health Organization .
• Walsh K. What Is Self-Esteem? DailyOM . August 2022.
• Mills J et al. Exploring the Meaning and Practice of Self-Care Among Palliative Care Nurses and Doctors: A Qualitative Study. BMC Palliative Care . April 2018.
• What Is Self-Care. International Self-Care Foundation .
• Pizzo PA. A Prescription for Longevity in the 21st Century: Renewing Purpose, Building and Sustaining Social Engagement, and Embracing a Positive Lifestyle. JAMA . January 2020.
• Pedro F et al. Association of Leisure-Time Physical Activity Across the Adult Life Course With All-Cause and Cause-Specific Mortality. JAMA . March 2019.
• Alimujiang A et al. Association Between Life Purpose and Mortality Among U.S. Adults Older Than 50 Years. JAMA . May 2019.
• Fadnes LT. Life Expectancy Can Increase by Up to 10 Years Following Sustained Shifts Toward Healthier Diets in the United Kingdom. Nature . November 2023.
• Li H et al. Association of Healthy Sleep Patterns With Risk of Mortality and Life Expectancy at Age of 30 Years: A Population-Based Cohort Study. QJM . March 2024.
• Rojas-Rueda D, et al. Green spaces and mortality: a systematic review and meta-analysis of cohort studies. Lancet . November 2019.
• Riegel B et al. Self-Care Research: Where Are We Now? Where Are We Going?  International Journal of Nursing Studies . April 2021.

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“Be there for others, but never leave yourself behind.” ~Dodinsky

Sometimes, when we’re feeling stressed and running around taking care of everybody else, the healthiest thing we can do is to stop and consider how we can take care of ourselves.

While this seems obvious to some people, many of us struggle with the idea of putting ourselves first. We were raised to think we should always put others before ourselves and ignore our own needs—that it is somehow arrogant or self-centered, and not a nice thing to do.

So why is self-care not held in high regard as the essential practice that it is for our well-being?

Here, I take a look at some misconceptions that hold us back from looking after the most important person in our lives, explore why self-care is better for others around us, and share my own list of self-care commitments, as somebody who has struggled with this in the past.

1. We think self-care means being selfish.  

Taking care of ourselves is the opposite of being selfish, as it strengthens us and enables us to support our loved ones better. We are no use to anyone if our energy is depleted because we have given every last bit of it away. Self-care is an antidote to stress, as it builds resilience so we can better cope with challenges.

Just think how they tell us to put on our oxygen mask first on an airplane before we help others. Yes, absolutely support others, but nurture yourself first.

2. We confuse “rescuing” with caring.

We often sacrifice self-care because we’re too busy trying to save everyone else. But people have to learn their own lessons in life, however painful that is. Who are you to decide that you know what is right for them? Now that is selfish, as it’s based on your own desires for them, which may not truly be in their best interests.

The way we can really help is to focus on ourselves and stop trying to run others’ lives. While we think we’re caring by “rescuing” them from unpleasant experiences in their lives, we are denying them the opportunity to face their own challenges, and grow stronger or learn a lesson from doing so.

This has been a hard truth for me to face, as I always thought I was being nice and caring. It’s even tougher to accept now that a close family member of mine is very ill, mostly caused by their own actions. I have an overwhelming desire to help, and have tried on numerous occasions, but I now realize that they have to want to change.

By rescuing them every time, out of what we believe is love, the rest of the family are enabling this person to stay feeling helpless, and we are burning ourselves out with stress.

I don’t mean we should never help people, but there is a difference between providing support for somebody who asks and taking it upon ourselves to save somebody and make their life turn out in a way that we think it should.

3. We are accustomed to relationships based on neediness, not real love.

We often fall in love with the idea of being in love because we watch Hollywood films that portray love as dramatic and needing to be with somebody 24/7.

When we give from this place, we give too much because we believe we have to die for that person and other such dramatic statements. As Ernest Hemingway wrote in Men Without Women , “The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much and forgetting that you are special too.”

Instead of spending our every waking hour thinking about that other person and forgetting ourselves, we (and our partners!) would be better served by focusing on ourselves. This way, we’ll be able to give from a place of wholeness, without expecting anything in return or feeling resentful.

As Rollo May said, “Love is generally confused with dependence; but in point of fact, you can only love in proportion to your capacity for independence.” If we take care of ourselves , we are more independent, less needy of getting attention or affection, and more capable of truly connecting with another human being.

4. We don’t realize we teach people how to treat us.

We teach people how to treat us by our own actions and attitude toward ourselves. By putting signs out there that you are a rescuer and will sacrifice yourself to help others , you attract the sort of people who want to be rescued and for whom it has to be all about them—not a balanced relationship.

Then, you have made it a self-fulfilling prophecy, by effectively bringing about what you always complain that you attract: people who take advantage of your good nature.

Here, it is useful to question whether they have really taken everything we have or if we have voluntarily given it all to them. Yes, they have played a part, but we can’t change them. We only have control over our own actions, so what part did we play?

Also, although this can be hard to hear, there is always a pay-off for us. Is it that you always get to be the “nice guy” or the “victim”? Take a long hard look now…

5. We expect others to take care of us.

While we might believe that our actions are purely altruistic and caring, are we actually expecting something in return?

I have previously been guilty of giving everything and believing I was being nice, but then feeling resentful when they inevitably didn’t give back in equal measure.

I complained to my friends that this or that person didn’t give me enough (and, in some cases, I wouldn’t have been wrong!) It’s easy to complain about what others aren’t doing. It’s hard to accept that we have chosen to give all our love to them and keep none for ourselves, expecting them to fill a gap they couldn’t fill, because it was our own self-esteem that was missing.

Yes, somebody may take advantage of your caring nature, but if you lie down to be walked on, you can’t be surprised when people treat you like a doormat. Your self-care is your responsibility, nobody else’s.

6. We don’t realize our worth.

Ultimately, it boils down to the fact that we think others are worth more than us. If we are confident in our love for ourselves and treat ourselves as if we are worthy, then that is what we will attract back.

Yes, I’m afraid it comes down to that whole self-love thing again! There is a reason why this is a cliché, though, because the key to meaningful relationships really is to love ourselves first.

So, What Does Self-Care Look Like?

Self-care is essential for us all, but looks different from person to person. We are all individuals with different preferences. Listen to your inner voice to find out what makes you content. Sometimes we can’t even hear our own inner voice because we are so busy anticipating the needs of those we care about, so you might have to listen carefully at first.

Below is my own personal list of self-care practices . I hope it gives you some inspiration for ways to take care of yourself.

I commit to:

1. Being fully in and embracing the present moment—mindful living

2. Preparing and eating three healthy meals a day, avoiding sugar fixes

3. Getting outside every day

4. Exercising every day

5. Doing something I enjoy every day—being creative

6. Spending time with positive people

7. Setting healthy boundaries— saying no more often

8. Identifying negative self-talk and changing it to positive

9. Pausing before reacting—do I really want to do this?

10. Getting one thing done every day, and celebrating this achievement

11. Looking after my health, body, skin, hair, teeth—regular appointments

12. Being grateful—starting each day with at least three things I am thankful for

13. Regular yoga and meditation

14. Laughing more and starting the day with a smile

15. Singing or dancing whenever possible

16. Having more fun and taking life less seriously

17. Treating myself with love and compassion—being my own best friend

18. Focusing on myself and prioritizing my needs —not focusing on the lives of others

19. Spending time alone and being still every day

20. Being my authentic self, not what others want me to be

21. Listening to my inner voice/intuition and doing what feels right for me

22. Avoiding over-analyzing a situation

23. Limiting my time on Facebook

24. Not worrying about what other people think about me

25. Getting a good sleep every night

26. Being patient with myself

27. My self-development, no matter how challenging

What’s your most important self-care practice?

About Jo Ritchie

After working in the corporate world for seventeen years, Jo redesigned her life to follow her bliss. She now travels the world running workshops and retreats and speaking about her experiences. Jo uses her background in martial arts, with her training in yoga teaching, coaching, and NLP, to help others find their power within. Visit her at  joritchie.com  and  followyourblissblog.com .

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Why Self-Preservation Is Key to Protecting Your Peace Every Day

Hold on to those moments that are just for you

Olga Rolenko / Moment / Getty

Understanding Self-Preservation

Self-preservation in different contexts.

• Self-Preservation and Personal Growth

Developing Self-Preservation Skills

Most afternoons, I enjoy a hot cup of tea with a splash of milk while sitting in silence at the dining table. It’s 10 minutes of solitude before my husband and kids come home and chaos ensues where I have to jump from snack-making, dinner-prepping, and sock-picking to errand running.

I protect this time like my life depends on it. Here’s how that kind of self-preservation may be the key to maintaining peace in your mind and body every day.

Liz Hughes, MEd, LPCC , founder and therapist of Mind Body Therapy explains that self-preservation is our innate biological instinct to stay alive.

Basic Instinct of Self-Preservation in Organisms

When I was pregnant with my son, I went hiking with my sister. Halfway through our trek, my sister’s face suddenly turned white. She spotted a bear about 30 feet from us. My hands immediately grabbed my belly and without thinking, I speed-waddled backwards until the creature was out of sight and started sprinting. 

Self-preservation doesn’t just occur for humans. All animals have a biological instinct to avoid harm, evade predators, and do what it takes to survive.

Fleeing the scene gave me and my unborn child the best chance of survival. If I was closer to the bear or dashed towards it, it may have mauled me for its own self-preservation.

Psychological Aspects of Self-Preservation

There are several psychological responses such as flight, flight or freeze which may coincide with emotions such as anxiety, panic or fear.

“Some people are more resilient to physical or psychological threats while others may be severely impacted. Researchers today continue to explore the reasoning behind the resiliency of humans but some research suggests there are genetic and personality components that lead to better outcomes in the face of adversity,” Hughes says.

The Role of Self-Preservation in Mental Health

Self-preservation has an important role in mental health. It helps us protect ourselves from emotional and psychological harm—it doesn't just mean running way from bears!

Self-preservation can look like any number of things like the following:

• Setting boundaries
• Practicing self-care
• Adopting healthy coping mechanisms
• Taking breaks at work
• Avoiding certain people or social situations you’ve had negative experiences with

Self-preservation can look different depending on the context. 

Self-Preservation in the Workplace

Hughes shares that at the workplace, someone can use self-preservation by pausing before reacting to a difficult situation.

“If your tendency at work is to immediately take the blame for something even if it isn’t your mistake, you can try pausing and sitting in awkward silence. Conversely, if you usually jump to blame others at work maybe you can try pausing and taking a breath before speaking your thoughts,” explained Hughes.

Self-Preservation in Relationships and Social Interactions

Ricki Romm, LCSW , a psychotherapist who helps individuals and couples explains that self-preservation means protecting your own well-being as part of maintaining a healthy relationship with a partner. 

“That might mean setting and maintaining personal boundaries, expressing or advocating for your own needs , or taking steps to preserve your sense of self and individuality. The goal is to build a relationship where both parties can thrive, rather than prioritizing one’s needs over another’s,” Romm says.

Self-Preservation in Challenging or Dangerous Situations

Hughes shares that in a dangerous situation, it may be counterintuitive to slow down and consider the best option available to you; however, it might be more helpful to do this than making an impulsive decision rooted in anxiety or fear.

For instance, when paramedics first enter a scene, they do not immediately rush to the injured person. Their first step is to check for danger and assess the environment to ensure it’s safe before approaching.

Not every difficult situation you encounter in your life will be this dramatic. With luck, you'll never face an inherently dangerous situation at all! Even so, following those steps to stop, breathe, and think will be a huge boost to your self-preservation toolkit, even if your own personal danger zone is your living room after everyone gets home in the afternoon.

Self-Preservation and Personal Growth

Self-preservation can be used as a personal development tool. This involves consciously prioritizing your emotional and physical well-being and safety.

Overcoming Fear

Romm shares that self-preservation can help to overcome fear and self-doubt by building resilience and confidence. 

“When you take care of yourself, you have a greater capacity to navigate challenges," Romm says. "And the more you see yourself as capable of navigating challenges, the less you fear them or doubt your ability to do so."

Cultivating Self-Compassion

When you focus on self-preservation, you become more mindful of your needs and feelings. This allows you to respond to yourself with kindness rather than self-criticism.

Setting boundaries to protect your mental and emotional health reinforces the idea that you deserve care and respect. This helps you build a compassionate attitude towards yourself.

Stress and burnout are threats to our well-being. Engaging in self-preservation can make it easier to give yourself a break and practice self-care since you’re less likely to be overwhelmed or reactive.

Nurturing Self-Acceptance

Self-preservation encourages acceptance of your limits, imperfections, strengths and vulnerabilities without judgment. It recognizes that it’s okay to prioritize your needs and not always meet external expectations.

When you preserve your well-being, you’re creating a safe space to grow and heal. It gives you permission to accept who you are now while you work on becoming your best self.

Romm advises that for many people, the hardest part about developing self-preservation skills is doing the internal work.

“First, being honest with yourself about what your needs are is often easier said than done, especially if you were taught to focus on or prioritize others," Romm says. "And then understanding what gets in your way of taking care of yourself.

She says that beliefs about what you deserve, should need, or should can make it more difficult enact self-care or find support.

Hughes shares that it can be difficult to challenge our biological response to things like fight, flight or freeze. However, if someone wants to improve their self-preservation skills, she recommends working on emotion regulation practices. 

Healthy emotional regulation means recognizing and understanding your emotional responses. Learn to accept your emotions without rejecting or fearing them, even when they aren’t socially accepted such as anger or sadness.

Use strategies to reduce the intensity of emotions when necessary. This allows you to maintain control and behave constructively when you feel triggered . Lastly, resist impulsive behaviors that might come up when you’re upset, such as lashing out.

Therefore, leaning into your biological instincts may be the key to protecting your peace. The next time you face a challenge, stop and take a moment to listen to your body. It might just tell you what you need to do.

American Psychological Association. APA Dictionary of Psychology Self-Preservation Instinct .

By Katharine Chan, MSc, BSc, PMP Katharine is the author of three books (How To Deal With Asian Parents, A Brutally Honest Dating Guide and A Straight Up Guide to a Happy and Healthy Marriage) and the creator of 60 Feelings To Feel: A Journal To Identify Your Emotions. She has over 15 years of experience working in British Columbia's healthcare system.

Greater Good Science Center • Magazine • In Action • In Education

To Be Happier, Should You Focus on Yourself or Others?

If we want to become happier, should we focus on ourselves or focus on others?

Prior research suggests that we may benefit more from helping and giving to others. But, at the same time, too much of a focus on others can sometimes lead to burnout and exhaustion . Now, new research suggests that we might want to pursue a mix of both strategies—each of which can boost our well-being in slightly different ways.

In a study published in the journal Emotion , 263 American participants received instructions on their smartphone daily for 10 days, to perform one of three activities. One group was assigned to engage in moral deeds (such as giving to charity or helping someone else), one group to think moral thoughts (such as thinking good things about someone else or hoping for someone else’s success), and one group to do something kind for themselves (such as relaxing or treating themselves to a nice meal). On five of the study days, participants were instructed to complete their assigned practice; on the other five days, they were given no instructions.

Each night, participants filled out surveys of their happiness, their life satisfaction, their sense of purpose in life, and how connected they felt to others. The surveys also asked participants how moral and virtuous they felt, how exhausted they were, and how much they felt different emotions, including gratitude and elevation (the feeling of inspiration that comes from witnessing someone else’s good deed).

The researchers then compared people’s responses on days when they engaged in the practices to days when they did not—and found that the practices had a wide range of benefits. Most notably, all three practices led participants to report greater happiness and life satisfaction, elevation, and closeness with others that day.

But certain practices had particular benefits. Only doing moral deeds and thinking moral thoughts led people to feel more empathic, moral, and grateful that day. And only doing moral deeds led people to feel less angry, less isolated, more in control, and more purposeful in life. Interestingly, the researchers found that the “treat yourself” practice did have one unique benefit: It led people to feel less exhausted.


The researchers suggest that activities focused on others and activities focused on ourselves could impact our well-being through different routes. Other-focused acts might boost “eudaimonic” well-being , the kind that comes from a sense of purpose and meaning. On the other hand, they suggest that self-focused behaviors could bring us “hedonic” well-being (feelings of happiness and enjoyment).

This research builds on a 2018 study , which found that being kind to others or to oneself both increased happiness. However, this prior study focused only on one benefit (happiness), while the current study included a wider range—and found different effects on people’s empathy, morality, gratitude, and exhaustion.

These findings are significant because they aren’t necessarily intuitive to us—which means we probably aren’t making the best choices for our overall thriving. In a follow-up study, the researchers asked a different group of participants to guess how moral deeds, moral thoughts, and treating oneself would affect well-being. The researchers found that people tended to underestimate some of the benefits of treating themselves, suggesting that people don’t fully recognize the importance of self-care and self-kindness.

Taking time for self-care may prevent the exhaustion that sometimes results from focusing only on the needs of others. Ultimately, the researchers suggest, the goal would be to balance self-care with helping others—which is easier said than done, of course. “Alternating which strategy one employs might enable people to get the benefits of both, without the drawbacks of either,” write study authors Adam Waytz, associate professor at the Kellogg School of Management at Northwestern University, and Wilhelm Hofmann, professor at the University of Cologne.

In other words, we shouldn’t necessarily be looking for the one secret to happiness, but rather practicing a variety of activities. As the researchers explain, “there are multiple paths to subjective well-being.”

About the Author

Elizabeth Hopper

Elizabeth Hopper, Ph.D. , received her Ph.D. in psychology from UC Santa Barbara and currently works as a freelance science writer specializing in psychology and mental health.

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The Importance of Self-Care

The Importance of Self-care

We can all help our loved ones and community members get through crisis. But as we take action to support others, it is also vital that we take the time to support and care for ourselves. This page shares tips and resources to help you practice self-care.

If you’re looking for additional resources or support for yourself or a loved one, please call or text the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988 or chat online at  988lifeline.org/chat .

While you are supporting and helping someone who may be in crisis, it is especially important for you to also take care of yourself. Practicing self-care does not mean you are choosing yourself over your loved one. It means that you are simply being mindful of your own needs, so you are better able to support the people you care about. When you take care of yourself and are not stressed, you are better able to meet the needs of others.

Self-care comes in a variety of forms. It does not require an elaborate plan; self-care can be as simple as taking a deep breath when you notice you are becoming stressed. By maintaining your physical and mental health, you will likely be better equipped to handle the stressors that come along with supporting someone you care about. ( Source )

Signs of Stress (Adapted from Vibrant Emotional Health’s Staying in Balance: Healthy Solutions for Managing Workplace Stress and Mayo Clinic’s Caregiver Stress Management )  

Take a look at this list, and check in with yourself. It’s important and healthy to acknowledge your limits.

Do you feel…

• Anxious or full of worry?
• Unable to concentrate?
• Achy or sick more than usual?
• Sad or generally unhappy?
• Overwhelmed and constantly worried?
• Irritable or short tempered?
• Tired often?
• Lonely or alone?

Are you having trouble…

• Remembering things?
• Getting your work done?
• Making good decisions?
• Used alcohol, cigarettes, or drugs to “feel better”?
• Been sleeping too much or too little?
• Been eating too much or too little?
• Gained or lost weight?
• Isolated yourself from friends and family?
• Neglected responsibilities?
• Lost interest in activities you used to enjoy?

These can all be signs and symptoms of stress. If you think stress-overload might be affecting your life, there is something you can do about it.

Self-Care Strategies for Managing Stress

Self-care, as the word itself suggests, is what we do to take care of ourselves. When we get stressed out, we tend to ignore the very things that might make us feel better, so it is important to find time to take care of yourself.

Remain socially connected. When you are supporting someone else, it can be easy to lose sight of your other social connections. It is important stay in touch with your family and friends who can offer support. Set aside some time each week to spend time with others in your support network. ( Source )

Maintain a healthy lifestyle. By improving your physical health, you will be better able to maintain your mental health, and therefore may be more effective in supporting someone you care about.

• Exercising regularly is an important part of staying both physically and mentally healthy. Exercise doesn’t have to consist of a complicated workout routine at the gym. It can be as simple as taking the stairs instead of the elevator, or walking or biking instead of driving. Daily exercise produces stress-relieving hormones and improves your general health.
• Eating healthy foods is what will give your body fuel to exercise. By eating mostly unprocessed foods, you can lower your risk for chronic illness and stabilize your energy and mood.
• Getting enough sleep is also important in maintaining your physical and mental health. People generally require 7 – 9 hours of sleep to stay healthy. Turning off your phone and TV about 30 minutes before you go to bed can help you sleep better.
• Avoiding use or misuse of drugs and alcohol is an important aspect of stress management because rather than reducing stress, drugs and alcohol can worsen it. Click here if you are seeking help for substance abuse.
• Practicing relaxation exercises such as deep breathing and meditation can help reduce stress, and clear your mind. Click here to learn more about these exercises.( Source )

Make time for yourself. When caring for someone who may be suicidal, it can be hard to find time to take care of yourself. However, to be a productive caregiver, it is important to have some “me time.” Write out a list of activities that bring you joy to refer to when you need some time for yourself. These activities do not have to be elaborate or take a lot of planning. It can be something as simple as taking a walk in a park, listening to music, or writing in your journal. Anything that makes you feel better is worth a little bit of time out of your day.

Know when you need to ask for help . When caring for someone with suicidal thoughts, you may become overwhelmed. Being overwhelmed does not make you a bad caregiver, family member, or friend, it makes you human. There are various resources for caregivers such as NAMI Family Support Groups . These groups offer support for people with loved ones who have experienced symptoms of a mental illness. In addition, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is always available to provide free and confidential support and resources to you or your loved one by calling or texting 988 or chat online at 988lifeline.org/chat .

Self-Care: 12 Ways to Take Better Care of Yourself

Exhausted, uninspired, or unwell read these self-care tips to take care of you..

Posted December 28, 2018 | Reviewed by Lybi Ma

• What Is Stress?
• Take our Burnout Test
• Find a therapist to overcome stress
• Self-care, which includes nutrition, stress reduction, and exercise, helps keep a person happy, healthy, and resilient.
• Me-time is usually last on the agenda for most people, largely due to technology and job stress.
• Things like taking a trip or simply getting outside can contribute to lowering one's stress level and increasing life satisfaction.

It’s so important to make sure you take good care of your body, mind, and soul every day, not just when you get sick. Learning how to eat right, reduce stress, exercise regularly, and take a time-out when you need it are touchstones of self-care and can help you stay healthy, happy, and resilient .

Why Do We Often Fail at Self-Care?

Practicing self-care isn’t always easy. Most of us are crazy busy, have stressful jobs, or are too consumed with technology to make time for ourselves. Me-time is usually last on the agenda. Worse, we can sometimes feel guilty about taking the time required to take care of ourselves. So getting started with self-care can be challenging. In my new book, Outsmart Your Smartphone: Conscious Tech Habits for Finding Happiness, Balance, and Connection IRL , I teach folks how to find time and make space for self-care. But here are some additional tips that you won't find in the book to get you started with your self-care.

How Do You Engage in Self-Care?

Fortunately, there are many things you can do to engage in self-care. You can read about self-care strategies, join self-care programs, or work with a coach or therapist who can help support your progress . No matter what you choose, the goal is to figure out which self-care strategies work best for you, learn how to use these strategies, and implement them in your regular routine so you can boost your well-being not only today but forever.

Here are 12 ways to get started with your self-care.

1. Make sleep part of your self-care routine.

Sleep can have a huge effect on how you feel both emotionally and physically. Not getting enough can even cause major health issues. But stress and other distractions can wreak havoc on our sleep.

What do you do to make sleep part of a self-care routine ? Start by thinking about your nightly routine. Are you eating or drinking immediately before bed? If so, it's especially important to stay away from caffeine and sugar, which tend to keep you awake.

Reducing stress is also key. If you have work-related stress , think about the best ways to calm yourself after a hard day or relax more while on the job. You might talk to your employer about lessening your workload or settle a disagreement with a coworker.

Next, make sure your bedroom is the best possible place for you to get good REM sleep. It should be free of distractions (such as a television, laptop, cellphone, etc.). And make sure you have room-darkening curtains to keep the sun from waking you up too early in the mornings.

2. Take care of yourself by taking care of your gut.

Your gut health can have a significant impact on your health, well-being, and feelings of vitality. The types of foods you eat crucially impact the bacteria that live in your stomach, resulting in a cascade of either positive or negative outcomes. Healing the gut can lead to an unhappy person, and vice-versa.

3. Exercise daily as part of your self-care routine.

We all know exercise is good for us, but do we really know how good it is? Daily exercise can help you both physically and mentally, boosting your mood and reducing stress and anxiety , not to mention helping you shed extra weight.

Of course, it might be hard to go to the gym every day, so try to incorporate other exercises, such as walking, tennis, or yoga, which may be able to fit into your schedule more easily. The most important thing is to create a routine that works for you.

4. Eat right for self-care.

The food we eat has the potential to either keep us healthy or contribute to weight gain or diseases such as diabetes, but it can also keep our minds working and alert. Eating the right foods can help prevent short-term memory loss and inflammation, both of which can have long-term effects on the brain and, in turn, the rest of the body. Some of the most amazing self-care foods include fatty fish, blueberries, nuts, green leafy veggies, and brassicas, like broccoli.

5. Say no to others, and say yes to your self-care.

Learning to say no is really hard; many of us feel obligated to say yes when someone asks for our time or energy. However, if you’re already stressed or overworked, saying yes to loved ones or coworkers can lead to burnout, anxiety, and irritability. It may take a little practice, but once you learn how to politely say no, you'll start to feel more self-confident, and you'll have more time for your self-care.

6. Take a self-care trip.

Taking a self-care trip can make a huge difference in your life. Even if you’re not feeling particularly stressed, getting away for a weekend every now and then can help you disconnect, relax, and be rejuvenated. These self-care trips don’t have to be costly; simply drive to the next town over and see the sights, or go camping nearby. The goal is to veer away from your normal schedule and take the time to do something just for yourself.

7. Take a self-care break by getting outside.

Spending time outside can help you reduce stress, lower your blood pressure, and live in the moment. Studies have even shown that getting outside can help reduce fatigue, making it a great way to overcome symptoms of depression or burnout. Getting outside can also help you sleep better at night, especially if you do some physical activity, like gardening, hiking, or walking while you are outside.

8. Let a pet help you with your self-care.

Pets can bring a boost to our lives. From giving unconditional love to providing companionship, pets can be hugely beneficial for our self-care. Dogs especially can help reduce stress and feelings of anxiety and can even lower blood pressure. In fact, many people who suffer from disorders like PTSD have benefited from working daily with animals, which is why service dogs have become so helpful for these individuals.

9. Take care of yourself by getting organized.

Getting organized is often the first step to becoming a healthier you because it allows you to figure out exactly what you need to do to take better care of yourself. A small change, like keeping a planner or a calendar on the fridge, can help you write down all your responsibilities and appointments, while at the same time keeping your life a bit more organized. You can also create an area to keep keys, purses, backpacks, briefcases, and coats, and make sure they’re ready to go for the next day.

10. Cook at home to care for yourself.

Many people don’t take the time to make themselves meals, preferring instead to stop for fast food or popping a pre-made meal in the microwave. But these "fast" meals aren’t usually sufficient when it comes to feeding your body the right kinds of calories and nutrients. Even if it’s only once a week, consider making a healthy meal for yourself or your whole family. You could even look into a meal delivery service or meal kit that can help you get started.

11. Read a book on self-care for self-care.

In today’s fast-paced world, we tend to turn to our phones for entertainment or comfort, scrolling through news feeds that can contribute to our stress and worries rather than helping it. Instead, consider bringing a self-help book with you when you leave the house. Even better, bring books on self-care so that you can learn more about how to take care of yourself while you are taking care of yourself. You might be amazed at the difference it can make when you slow down instead of always looking at your phone. Not only can it help improve your mood, but it can also help you to stay more present and mindful .

12. Schedule your self-care time, and guard that time with everything you have.

It can be hard for us all to find extra time. But it’s extremely important to plan regular self-care time. Moments alone can help you to ponder the best ways to move forward in your life and keep you grounded. And moments with friends can help you feel more connected and relaxed.

Whether you decide you want to go for a long walk, take a hot bath, or enjoy a good movie with friends, taking self-care time is imperative. Look for small ways you can incorporate it into everyday life; for example, you might wake up 15 minutes earlier to sit with a cup of tea and practice deep breathing before the chaos of the day begins, or you might take a walk around the block on your lunch break. The more you can work self-care time into your schedule, the better you’ll be able to grow, enjoy your life, and thrive.

This post was co-written by self-care advocate Brad Krause .

To find a therapist, please visit the Psychology Today Therapy Directory .

LinkedIn Image Credit: Izida1991/Shutterstock

Tchiki Davis, Ph.D. , is a consultant, writer, and expert on well-being technology.

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Knowledge for nurses to better care for themselves so they can better care for others during the Covid-19 pandemic and beyond

Anne hofmeyer.

a Anglia Ruskin University, UK

c Rosemary Bryant AO Research Centre, UniSA Clinical and Health Sciences, University of South Australia, Adelaide, Australia

d UniSA Clinical and Health Sciences, University of South Australia, GPO Box 2471, Adelaide, Australia

Ruth Taylor

b University of Aberdeen, King's College, Aberdeen AB24 3FX, United Kingdom

Kate Kennedy

1. introduction.

Viktor E. Frankl (1945, p. 165) declared, “The meaning of life is to help others find the meaning of theirs”. Arguably, the need for empathy, compassion and meaning in the lives of our patients, families, colleagues and ourselves has never been greater.

To care for others with compassion is why we became nurses ( Vachon, 2016 ). The rapid spread of SARS-CoV-2, the virus that causes Covid-19, is an international public health event without precedent in any of our lifetimes. Not everyone will be affected physically by the virus, but every one of us will be affected psychologically. It is critical that nurses do not neglect their mental health during this pandemic. The global nursing and healthcare community is at the forefront of this unprecedented public health outbreak. The World Health Organization is one of many trusted public health organisations to provide comprehensive guidelines for the protection of front-line healthcare workers ( WHO, 2020 ). But there are alarming reports of ongoing global shortages of personal protective equipment (PPE), for example: clinical staff in Chinese hospitals wore their raincoats or plastic garbage bags as protection ( Smith et al., 2020 ). There are courageous stories, but also reports of resource rationing decisions, ongoing PPE shortages, and unrelenting pressure and grief. But nurses have experienced significant occupational stress, pressure and burnout prior to the Covid-19 pandemic.

To spark debate about these ‘contemporary issues’, we present a series of three papers for different audiences (i.e., nurse educators; front-line nurses; health system leaders and managers) to explain how empathic healthcare cultures and constructs such as empathy, emotion regulation, compassion, and self-care could sustain wellbeing, resilience and effectiveness in these volatile times. In this second of three papers, we explain how nurses, midwives and students can better care for themselves (e.g., self-care strategies such as kind self-talk; emotion regulation) so they can better care for others during the Covid-19 pandemic, and beyond.

First, we provide an overview of caring for ourselves and resilience in uncertain times. Next, we discuss empathy and compassion and explain why emotion regulation (‘self-other’ distinction) is an essential self-care strategy that nurses must learn so they can sustain care for others. Next, we explain how the practice of self-compassion can safeguard mental health, wellbeing, regulate emotions and reduce vulnerability. We then describe tips to support self-care and list trusted online resources that are providing regular updated information about Covid-19. Keeping strong in body, mind, and spirit to cope with ever-changing circumstances is vital.

2. Caring for ourselves so we can care for others

How do you talk to yourself when you are having a difficult time or have made a mistake? Are you kind and understanding and talk to yourself as you would talk to a good friend who is upset, or are you critical and judgmental? Studies show harsh self-talk and self-criticism activates the sympathetic nervous system that stimulates the stress response, so is harmful to our mental health and wellbeing ( Singer and Klimecki, 2014 ). As nurses, we understand the importance of self-care strategies (e.g., adequate sleep, healthy eating, regular exercise, social connections, mindfulness) to foster our resilience ( Mills et al., 2018 ; Cusack et al., 2016 ). Another important self-care strategy is kind self-talk which is a component of self-compassion ( Neff, 2011 ). We must first practice self-compassion and be aware of our own needs, before we can help others with theirs ( Vachon, 2016 ). When we talk kindly to ourselves, we strengthen our pro-social behaviours (e.g., altruism, kindness, empathy) toward others ( Singer and Klimecki, 2014 ). When we are empathic, we communicate better with patients, families, and colleagues. This process can lead to a deeper understanding of what matters to patients, and how to act with kindness and compassion to relieve their suffering and distress ( Vachon, 2016 ).

Nurses can use self-care strategies such as emotion regulation and self-compassion to lessen their vulnerability to caregiving fatigue and to improve their wellbeing and resilience.

2.1. Resilience in uncertain times

Everyone differs in their need for control, ability to tolerate uncertainty, and capacity to be resilient ( Hanson, 2018 ). Control is vital for our wellbeing, but our plans and sense of normality are being threatened and disrupted by forces beyond our control. Resilience starts with self-awareness, understanding how you are being affected by the uncertainty, powerlessness and difficult events. Fear, anxiety, anger, sadness and grief are normal feelings in the current crisis. We need to acknowledge our feelings of vulnerability, grief and worry, rather than telling ourselves we shouldn't have those feelings because other people are worse off ( Berinato, 2020 ). “When we are no longer able to change a situation – we are challenged to change ourselves” ( Frankl, 1945 , p. 112). Instead of focusing on negativity and uncertainty, we need to accept what we are going through and work out what we can do. Resilience is our capacity to maintain our wellbeing and respond effectively in the face of uncertainty. Psychological resilience is based on self-efficacy, coping and mindfulness ( Cusack et al., 2016 ).

3. Empathy, self-awareness, emotion regulation and compassion

Clinical teams are more effective, morale is higher, patient satisfaction is higher, and safety improves when empathy and compassion are present in healthcare cultures ( Lown, 2018 ). Empathy is the ability to ‘feel with’ others and our empathic response is caused by the activation of neural networks in the anterior insula and anterior cingulate cortex that processes first person (our personal) experiences ( Singer and Klimecki, 2014 ). Functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) studies show that similar circuits of the brain are activated in both the person who is suffering and the person who is witnessing the suffering. It is vital we understand our empathic emotions are in response to seeing the other person suffering. In other words, it is not our suffering ( Singer and Klimecki, 2014 ).

This understanding that the suffering is external to ourselves is called the ‘self-other’ distinction. The ability to distinguish between our own and the emotional pain of others firstly requires self-awareness and then regulating our emotions to develop a protective ‘self-other’ boundary ( Vachon, 2016 ). The ability to regulate our emotions is key to avoid experiencing the distress of others. fMRI studies show that inadequate emotion regulation (i.e., blurring ‘self-other’ distinction) leads to individuals being unable to tolerate distressing emotions when confronted with another's suffering, so become overwhelmed. Nursing calls this debilitating condition ‘compassion fatigue’ which manifests as distress, emotional detachment from patients, feelings of isolation, and inability to care for self and others ( Hofmeyer et al., 2019 ). However neuroscientists have proven it is ‘empathic distress fatigue’ ( Singer and Klimecki, 2014 , p. 875).

In sum, exposure to the distress and suffering of others can lead to two different emotional responses. Empathic distress results from inadequate emotion regulation that triggers detachment and personal stress. In contrast, compassion is characterized by empathic concern and motivation to relieve others' distress and suffering ( Singer and Klimecki, 2014 ). Our ability to be self-aware and to regulate our emotions is key to our wellbeing and capacity to act with compassion. fMRI studies show compassion activates the medial orbitofrontal cortex related to positive affect, affiliation, maternal love, and reward leading to feelings of compassion for self and others ( Vachon, 2016 ). Compassion training includes strategies (e.g., meditation) to ease distress and strengthen resilience and attachment ( Vachon, 2016 ). Self-compassionate people are more likely to engage in ‘perspective taking’ which contributes to better mental health rather than ruminating about problems ( Neff, 2011 ). Acting with compassion is predicated on self-awareness and self-care including emotion regulation and self-compassion.

4. Self-compassion

Psychologist Kristin Neff was the first researcher to define and measure self-compassion two decades ago. As illustrated in Table 1 , self-compassion involves self-kindness, common humanity (understand that everyone makes mistakes and suffers), and mindfulness ( Neff, 2011 ). On the other hand, uncompassionate behaviour toward ourselves is expressed as self-criticism: self-judgement, isolation, over-identification ( Neff, 2011 ) as summarised in Box 1 .

Self-compassion and self-criticism.

Self-compassion affects our everyday lives and is expressed in how we relate to ourselves in times of perceived failure, inadequacy, or personal suffering ( Neff, 2011 ). Practicing self-compassion means we care with the same kindness and understanding toward ourselves when we fail, as we would care for a good friend ( Neff, 2011 ). Examples of actions that constitute self-compassion and actions that constitute self-criticism (that we need to lessen) are explained by Neff (2011) in Table 1 .

Learning to respond compassionately to our own distress requires self-awareness which, in turn, can strengthen our ability to activate our self-regulation systems so we feel safe (i.e., self-soothing activities stimulate positive emotions like contentment, more secure attachment) rather than feeling under threat ( Vachon, 2016 ). Self-care practices to develop self-awareness include mindfulness meditation and compassion training.

4.1. Benefits of self-compassion

Self-compassionate individuals have better psychological health, motivation, perspective-taking, better relationships and happiness ( Vachon, 2016 ). They experience less rumination, anxiety, depression, shame, and fear of failure. Self-compassion is an altruistic act that prepares us to cope with life stressors. Self-compassion is about ‘being with’ ourselves in a compassionate way – comforting, soothing, respecting and validating. This, in turn, prepares us to make self-compassionate choices about how to act in the world, such as:

• • Protecting: we feel safe from harm, and say no to people and factors that cause us harm;
• • Providing: we identify and give ourselves what we need to be well;
• • Motivating: we encourage ourselves to act with kindness and support ( Neff, 2011 ).

Self-compassion is a personal resource that can potentially help us live with greater ease by responding to our suffering and shortcomings in a supportive and balanced manner. Self-compassion promotes emotional stability, wellbeing and thriving. As we explained, self-criticism activates our sympathetic nervous system and elevates stress hormones ( Singer and Klimecki, 2014 ). Whereas when we practice self-compassion and remain calm in the face of failure, rejection or criticism, we de-activate the threat system and activate the care system so oxytocin and endorphins are released which helps reduce stress and increase feelings of safety ( Vachon, 2016 ).

5. Tips and resources for self-care

In this section, we list practical tips and online resources (i.e., organisations) providing regular updates to get you started so you can better manage in these uncertain times. However, this is by no means an exhaustive list. It is vital to be strong in body, mind, and spirit and courageously face the ever-changing circumstances of the Covid-19 pandemic. Self-care fosters greater self-compassion because it includes positive approaches to building resilience and regulating anxious emotions.

5.1. Self-care practices

Self-care is an intentional: “proactive, holistic, and personalised approach to the promotion of health and wellbeing through a variety of strategies, in both personal and professional settings, to enhance capacity for care of patients and their families” ( Mills et al., 2018 , p.1). The Schwartz Centre (2020) reminds us to accept that it is normal to feel sad, stressed, confused, and angry so it's important to monitor our stress levels. Develop a daily self-care routine to meet your basic needs: nutrition, hygiene, exercise, virtual social contact, and work to keep anxiety at bay. In addition:

• • Take breaks, go outside (even for short periods), adequate sleep, good nutrition, exercise.
• • Intentionally build moments of happiness, gratitude, and everyday pleasure in your life.
• • If you feel overwhelmed, seek support from a therapist (via telehealth).
• • Stay connected with colleagues, friends and relatives. Maintain social interaction and supportive networks in creative and safe ways. Practice ‘physical distancing’ during Covid-19, NOT ‘social distancing’. Our relationships with people and pets support our mental health.
• • Limit media exposure and access only trusted sites to minimise becoming overwhelmed.
• • Write a letter to yourself as if you were talking to a friend who was struggling with similar concerns. Read it later when the words can soothe and comfort you as you struggle.

5.2. Mindfulness meditation and compassion training

• • The Buddhist practice of mindfulness is about quietening and calming the mind by staying in the present moment, practicing gratitude in the midst of difficulties, breathing deeply, paying attention to sensations around you, and has proven benefits when practiced regularly. Mindfulness increases our psychological flexibility to regulate our emotions. fMRI studies show that mindfulness meditation regulates the anterior insula activity that is roused when we empathise with others' suffering, so can increase capacity for self-soothing. Meditation practices strengthen perspective, compassion, self-compassion and emotion regulation ( Klimecki et al., 2014 ).
• • Deep breathing takes us from the flight or fight mode (that stimulates the sympathetic system) into the calming parasympathetic system.
• • Caring touch such as placing your hand over your heart when feeling upset releases oxytocin that makes us feel safe and connected ( Neff, 2011 ).
• • Through compassion training, we increase our self-awareness, learn to regulate our emotions and strengthen our resilience. This, in turn, reduces empathic distress and increases our prosocial, kind, compassionate behaviour toward ourselves and others ( Klimecki et al., 2014 ).

5.3. Online resources

You can access local and international public health and professional websites for regular updated information about self-protection and coping during the Covid-19 pandemic. Various online resources provide ideas for self-care plans and supportive rituals. For example:

• • Schwartz Center for Compassionate Healthcare is supporting healthcare professionals to cope with the ever-changing challenges presented by Covid-19 pandemic. Visit their COVID-19 resource page that is regularly updated with tips and information to help caregivers support each other and care for themselves and maintain resilience.
• • WHO COVID-19 https://www.who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019
• • International Council of Nurses COVID-19 resources https://www.icn.ch/
• • RCN COVID-19 resources https://rcni.com/nursing-standard/covid-19
• • RCN resources and tips in RCNi newsletters to improve nurses' wellbeing and readiness to provide compassionate care. Take breaks, rest, rehydrate, refuel.
• • RCN Six steps to mindfulness: https://www.rcn.org.uk/magazines/bulletin/2019/june/mindfulness-meditation-tools-june-2019
• • Kristin Neff: 10 Self-Compassion practices for COVID-19: http://self-compassion.org/
• • Germer & Neff: Center for Mindful Self-Compassion: https://centerformsc.org/
• • Chris Germer: Mindful Self-Compassion program: https://chrisgermer.com/
• • SAHMRI Wellbeing and Resilience Centre https://www.wellbeingandresilience.com/

6. Conclusion

In the midst of the constantly evolving Covid-19 pandemic, it is vital that frontline clinicians have the support and essential resources they need to “reconnect with the purpose that drew them into healthcare so they can continue to experience, and offer, compassion” ( Lown, 2018 , p. 219). Knowledge and competence are as equally important as kindness and compassion in front-line nurses and responders to the Covid-19 pandemic. This unprecedented public health crisis is impacting every aspect of our daily life. Resilience, patience and kindness is needed to cope with the grief, distress and fear as we worry about the wellbeing of our patients, colleagues, our families and ourselves.

We have outlined tips and links to regularly updated information and self-care resources to safeguard our mental health, wellbeing and resilience as we work long hours caring for acutely ill patients and distressed families. Taken together, self-care and compassionate cultures are key ingredients to sustain wellbeing and resilience, contribute to nurses' career longevity, and compassionate practice now, and into the future beyond the Covid-19 crisis. In these moments of collective vulnerability and grief, let us all lead with hope and kindness toward others. As we continue to do the best we can in the days and months ahead, we can be encouraged by Ken Schwartz's words that simple acts of kindness can make the ‘unbearable bearable’ (Schwartz Centre, 2020 ).

CRediT author statement

Anne Hofmeyer: Conceptualisation, writing – original. Ruth Taylor: Conceptualisation, writing – review and editing. Kate Kennedy: Writing – review and editing.

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Taking Care of Ourselves & Each Other

Health & Well-Being Resources

Unique Cardinal Care Enrollment Situations

Learn about unique Cardinal Care enrollment situations, such as leaves of absence or degrees conferred off cycle. 

Cardinal Care and Leaves of Absence

If you are covered by Cardinal Care and contemplate taking a leave of absence (LOA) at any point in your academic career, be sure to contact Vaden Health Center’s Insurance and Referral Office for guidance about coverage, in advance, if possible. As you’ll see below, timing can be a driver as to whether coverage will be preserved.

A student enrolled in Cardinal Care who is granted an LOA in Autumn Quarter for which the effective date of the leave is  prior to the first day of class  will not be charged tuition or any associated fees for the quarter. Upon reversal of the tuition, the student’s eligibility for enrollment in Cardinal Care will be canceled retroactive to September 1. (The student’s eligibility for enrollment in Cardinal Care will resume upon return to the university and reinstatement of tuition.)

A student enrolled in Cardinal Care who is granted an LOA in Autumn Quarter for which the effective date of the leave is  on or after the first day of class  such that (prorated) tuition and associated fees for the quarter are charged will remain enrolled through the end of the plan year (August 31) and applicable fees will apply.

A student who is enrolled in Cardinal Care as of Autumn Quarter, and who is granted an LOA for a subsequent quarter (i.e., Winter, Spring, or Summer) will remain enrolled in and covered by Cardinal Care through the end of the plan year (August 31) and applicable fees will apply. 

A student who enters to the university in Winter Quarter or Spring Quarter, and who is subsequently granted an LOA for the entry quarter, will be subject to the same guiding principles as a student who enters in Autumn Quarter, i.e., if the effective date of the leave is prior to the first day of class, tuition and any associated fees for the quarter will be reversed. Upon reversal of the tuition, the student’s eligibility for enrollment in Cardinal Care will be canceled retroactively to the start of the applicable coverage period (January 1 for Winter Quarter entry students and April 1 for Spring Quarter entry students). If the effective date of the leave is on or after the first day of class but before the respective term withdrawal deadline, the student will be charged (prorated) tuition and associated fees for the quarter after confirmation of attendance in classes, or participation in units, by the Office of the University Registrar. If enrolled in Cardinal Care, the student will remain enrolled through the end of the plan year (August 31) and applicable fees will apply. 

Important to Note

Students on an LOA which crosses into a subsequent plan year, i.e., into September of the next academic year, will not be eligible to enroll in the Cardinal Care student health Insurance plan until they return and register in a future quarter such that a tuition charge posts.

Cardinal Care If You Confer Your Degree (Off Cycle)

Cardinal Care is an annual plan—that is, regardless of your quarter of entry or return, if you do not take steps to opt out of Cardinal Care by the applicable deadline you’ll have coverage starting in your entry quarter and running through the end of the plan year, i.e., August 31. You will be charged accordingly.

The one exception to this rule applies to students who graduate at the end of Autumn Quarter or Winter Quarter. Students who plan to end their relationship with the University, through conferral of a terminal degree at the end of Autumn Quarter or Winter Quarter, may request to be taken off the plan at the end of the corresponding Cardinal Care coverage period; December 31 for Autumn Quarter graduates and April 30 for Winter Quarter graduates. To initiate a request, you must complete the Petition for Early Cancellation of Cardinal Care Health Insurance form and submit it to Vaden Health Center’s Insurance and Referral Office by the applicable deadline; December 15 for Autumn Quarter graduates and April 15 for Winter Quarter graduates. Petition submission deadlines are strictly enforced. 

Students who graduate at the end of Spring Quarter do not have the option to leave the plan early, and coverage remains in effect through August 31.

2024–2025 Cardinal Care Cost and Coverage Options Based on Quarter of Graduation

If You Want Your Coverage to Continue…

Students enrolled in Cardinal Care who confer a degree at the end of Autumn Quarter or Winter Quarter and who wish to continue coverage do not need to take any action to stay in Cardinal Care through the end of the plan year (August 31).

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Where Tim Walz Stands on the Issues

As governor of Minnesota, he has enacted policies to secure abortion protections, provide free meals for schoolchildren, allow recreational marijuana and set renewable energy goals.

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By Maggie Astor

• Published Aug. 6, 2024 Updated Aug. 17, 2024, 10:08 a.m. ET

Follow live updates on the 2024 election .

Gov. Tim Walz of Minnesota, the newly announced running mate to Vice President Kamala Harris, has worked with his state’s Democratic-controlled Legislature to enact an ambitious agenda of liberal policies: free college tuition for low-income students, free meals for schoolchildren, legal recreational marijuana and protections for transgender people.

“You don’t win elections to bank political capital,” Mr. Walz wrote last year about his approach to governing. “You win elections to burn political capital and improve lives.”

Republicans have slammed these policies as big-government liberalism and accused Mr. Walz of taking a hard left turn since he represented a politically divided district in Congress years ago.

Here is an overview of where Mr. Walz stands on some key issues.

Mr. Walz signed a bill last year that guaranteed Minnesotans a “fundamental right to make autonomous decisions” about reproductive health care on issues such as abortion, contraception and fertility treatments.

Abortion was already protected by a Minnesota Supreme Court decision, but the new law guarded against a future court reversing that precedent as the U.S. Supreme Court did with Roe v. Wade, and Mr. Walz said this year that he was also open to an amendment to the state’s Constitution that would codify abortion rights.

Another bill he signed legally shields patients, and their medical providers, if they receive an abortion in Minnesota after traveling from a state where abortion is banned.

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