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The Meaning of Family to Me

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Published: Sep 19, 2019

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what does the word family mean to you essay

Five Stories That Redefine the Word Family

They share one important thing in common: Love.

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I LIVE IN MANHATTAN with two men—neither is my husband. In fact, they’re in love with each other. One is my best friend, Chris, whom I’ve known since we were 12, and the other is his partner, Curt; they’ve been together for three decades. When we were in our mid-30s, I was single and Chris was already with Curt. But we all wanted a child, which led to a plan: Chris and I would make a baby together. Not the traditional way—we did artificial insemination DIY-style, with help from a sterilized measuring cup, a homemade ovulation calendar, and a turkey baster.

.css-meat1u:before{margin-bottom:1.2rem;height:2.25rem;content:'“';display:block;font-size:4.375rem;line-height:1.1;font-family:Juana,Juana-weight300-roboto,Juana-weight300-local,Georgia,Times,Serif;font-weight:300;} .css-dqv6fo{margin:0rem;font-size:1.625rem;line-height:1.2;font-family:Juana,Juana-weight300-upcase-roboto,Juana-weight300-upcase-local,Georgia,Times,Serif;font-weight:300;letter-spacing:0.0075rem;text-transform:uppercase;}@media(max-width: 64rem){.css-dqv6fo{font-size:2.25rem;line-height:1;}}@media(min-width: 48rem){.css-dqv6fo{font-size:2.375rem;line-height:1;}}@media(min-width: 64rem){.css-dqv6fo{font-size:2.75rem;line-height:1;}}.css-dqv6fo em,.css-dqv6fo i{font-style:italic;font-family:inherit;}.css-dqv6fo b,.css-dqv6fo strong{font-family:inherit;font-weight:bold;} Chris said, 'I'm the father.' Then Curt said, 'And I'm the other father.'

After three months of trying, I got pregnant in August 2001. Chris and Curt were driving back from Fire Island, where they were renting a summer house, and I called to say, “You won’t be able to take that house next summer because we’re going to have a baby.” Lily was born in April 2002; when I was in the delivery room, someone asked Chris who he was. He said, “I’m the father.” Then Curt said, “And I’m the other father.”

Though we all lived in the same city, our apartments were 21 blocks apart, meaning Lily was shuttled back and forth constantly. After about ten months, we said, “This is crazy.” Everybody wanted to be with the baby, which meant we needed to live in the same place.

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So a month before Lily’s first birthday, we moved in together. Amazingly, it wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable—probably because we’d known each other so long. And it didn’t hurt that Curt has a fabulous eye for decoration. (Although there were some disagreements about which diapers to choose and whether organic baby food was really healthier.) Two years later, we tried for another baby, but I had two miscarriages . It was just too emotionally painful, so we all agreed we’d adopt. That’s how we got our son, Luca, who was born in Ethiopia. Now five of us live in the same happy, chaotic three-bedroom apartment.

The kids call Curt “Papi” and Chris “Daddy.” One doesn’t take precedence over the other—both are their fathers. Conservatives say we’re going to turn the kids gay , but I always tell people you couldn’t do that if you wanted to. When Luca was 8, we took him to the gay pride parade, and he was like, “I’m not gay, I’m hungry, and I don’t want to be here.”

I know it all sounds pretty hip, but we’re just like any other family . I’m the control freak, and Chris is the disciplinarian. (He hates that I’ll make Luca a separate dinner if he doesn’t like what the rest of us are eating.) For the children, though, having three parents is phenomenal; they have two fathers who’ll toss around a baseball with them for hours on end and a mom who’ll let them stay up too late watching movies in bed with her.And I’m lucky, too—if the kids are driving me nuts, Curt will take them out for an hour to give me some peace, then come home with a bottle of red wine.

Still, our situation definitely confuses people. We were coming back from a family vacation in Costa Rica in 2013, and the customs officer didn’t understand why each of the adults had a different last name; one kid had mine and the other had Chris’s. So we started trying to explain: “She’s my daughter and they’re her fathers, and they’re a couple, and he’s adopted.” The guy just handed back our passports, shaking his head and laughing as he sent us through. He said, “You couldn’t make this up if you tried.” —Judith Timoll, as told to Molly Sims

I WAS ENGAGED MORE than a decade ago, but broke it off after an important realization: I was staying with him only because I wanted kids. I’d always been very committed to becoming a mom someday; I’d created my own business and developed a flexible schedule based largely on that objective. So when I said goodbye to my fiancé at 30, I decided that if I hadn’t met somebody I wanted to have a family with by 37, I’d go for it another way.

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At 36 1/2, I was still single. At the same time, my parents were having marital troubles , and I wanted to encourage my mom to create some distance from her marriage. I made a proposal: She’d come live with me, I’d do IVF and have a baby, and she’d be my coparent . She moved in two weeks later. Then, while I was pregnant with my second daughter, Logan, we learned that my younger sister was seriously ill with pulmonary fibrosis , a rare disease that causes scarring and stiffening of the lung tissue—she’d need to be hooked up to an oxygen tank 24/7 and would be unable to work. So she moved in, too.

I call our place the sorority house.

We live in a five-bedroom colonial in a very traditional New Jersey suburb; nearly everyone on our street is a nuclear family or a retired couple. I call our place the sorority house because it really feels that way—I make eggs for all of us in the mornings, the three grown-ups watch The Bachelor on Monday nights, and we sing a lot of show tunes. My older daughter, Mischa, is in kindergarten, and though it’s sometimes tough for my sister to make the block-long walk, she’s out there to greet her niece at the bus stop in the afternoon as often as she can. She also comes up with little games to get the girls to eat healthy dinners and makes sure they know it’s okay to color outside the lines.

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I never could’ve predicted that this would be my path; while my feelings about motherhood are steadfast, my thoughts on our arrangement depend on the day. Sometimes it feels pretty ideal—because I have so many hands on deck, I get to have a mom’s night out or work in the evenings and not scramble for a babysitter. Other days, it feels like the most confining thing I could fathom—three adult women living in very close quarters. I’ll call my girlfriends to chat while I’m waiting at the car wash because that’s a rare moment of privacy. I guess we’re somewhere on the line between completely bizarre and totally normal.

In our society, we’re not really raised to think that we’ll live with our siblings and parents as adults, although in a lot of cultures, that’s exactly what happens. It looks like Americans are headed in that direction, with kids moving home after college and grandparents moving into their children’s places instead of retirement communities. I guess you could say our little crew is on the cutting edge. —Emily Wolper, as told to M.S.

Relative Strangers

In 2014, Florida paralegal Donna Skora wanted something you can’t find on Amazon : grandkids. “I was looking for a way to spend time with children,” she says. “My daughter and I are very close, but she doesn’t have kids. And for complicated reasons, I haven’t seen my son and grandchild since 2013. I tried being a baby cuddler at a neonatal unit in our local hospital for almost two years, but it was tough to fulfill the minimum hourly commitment while working. I wanted to be able to give someone a grandparent’s love and attention, and I couldn’t.”

A growing online community is turning Facebook friends into family.

So in January 2015, Skora founded a Facebook group called Surrogate Grandparents USA , a place where strangers can potentially become much more. On the page, prospective grandparents across the country offer their services for book reading and cookie-making, while parents post photos of kids who need the kind of cheerleading, comfort, and butterscotch candies that only grandparents can provide. (Access to the group is by permission only; Skora reviews each membership request and encourages anyone meeting up IRL to do a background check beforehand.) Short bios and locations are shared, and if there’s interest from a compatible family, the two parties start messaging privately and take things from there. Currently, the group has more than 3,700 members.

Beyond fractured relationships, there are plenty of reasons people join. “Distance is a big one,” says Skora, now 63. “Those with family outside the country might look for someone local. And, of course, there’s death: People who’ve had a family member pass away say they’re searching for a relationship to help fill a void.”

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Happy beneficiaries regularly post success stories: One woman praises a surrogate grandma’s weekly visits and homemade meatballs; surrogate grandparents show off photos of kid-centric trips to the zoo. “The success stories fill my heart,” says Skora. “And the dynamic serves both sides. I read that grandparents who babysit their grandchildren tend to live longer. Meanwhile, seniors offer kids knowledge and a connection to the past.”

The effect on Skora has been profound as well. “One premise of the group is healing through moving forward, and it’s served that purpose for me,” she says. At the moment, moderating the Facebook group nightly and holding down a full-time job means she can’t devote time to a surrogate grandkid of her own. But Skora looks forward to rectifying that after she retires. “Until then,” she says, “I feel like I’m the parent of a very large community, and I’m so proud of that.” —Molly Simms

MY MOM AND HER father moved to Salem, Oregon, in the summer of 1972, for his new job . That’s where she met my biological dad—I jokingly call it the “summer of love.” They were teenagers and together for only a few months. When they realized she was pregnant , he couldn’t commit to being a dad, so she moved in with her mom in Washington to have me. I was born when my mom was 17. My father met me as a baby, but by then, my mother was already with someone else, Dick, who didn’t mind raising another man’s child. She was too young, though, not ready to be a mother. She’d had a tough childhood and had turned out kind of rootless and wild. Eventually Dick got custody of me, which was fine—I’d always believed I was his biological daughter.

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After Dick remarried, my being around just didn’t work anymore. So at age 7, I went to live with his parents, who’d always wanted a little girl. Every day they made me feel so cherished, so loved. Then, when I was about 10, they sat me down and told me the truth: that none of them were related to me by blood. I was horrified and confused—I remember thinking, What am I?

I never, ever gave up hope.

As a teenager, I became fixated on finding my biological father. I grilled my mother, and she told me everything she knew: His name was Brian Miller; he was from Salem; and he was “tall, dark, and handsome.” Then, when I was 24, my mom died. It was incredibly tough to lose her, yet I continued my hunt for my father, despite the fact that all I had was a common name and no birth date. This was pre-internet—I even tried psychics and detectives. It was unbelievably frustrating, but I never, ever gave up hope.

In March 2018, I took an Ancestry.com test in the hopes of learning a little more about my medical history. The results turned up something else: It was “extremely likely” they’d found a parent-child match. There was a location, Maui, and initials: B.M. Brian Miller. I was so nervous to call him. When I finally summoned the nerve to pick up the phone—after a pep talk from my best friend—I started by saying, “Hi. This is Nicki, and Ancestry says we’re related.” He replied, “Do you know how long I’ve been looking for you?” All I could do was sob.

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The story came tumbling out: He’d been searching for decades, making fruitless cold calls, doing internet searches that went nowhere because my mom had changed her last name after getting married. But here we were. We started talking and texting several times a day. I was in the stratosphere—it was total euphoria, like finding the piece to a puzzle I’d been waiting most of my life to solve. My connection to him was visceral and soul-deep.

Three weeks after our first call, I flew to Maui to surprise him on Father’s Day. His girlfriend and daughter, my half sister, helped me plan it—I hid as we were driving up and crawled along the side of the house, so he wouldn’t see me through the giant picture window. As I walked through the front door, he was coming down the hall, and we locked eyes in person for the first time. He was speechless, with a giant grin on his face; in the video his girlfriend took, we’re giddy, hugging and laughing and crying all at once. My mascara is a mess.

I had father figures growing up, but when I met my dad in person, I finally appreciated the biological bond. I wanted to grab his hand and cling to him like a little kid, like Don’t ever go away again . I’m certain my mother had a hand in bringing us together somehow, and I’m just so thankful. Neither of us can tell this story without breaking into tears. —Nicole Fleetwood, as told to M.S.

I ALWAYS KNEW I WAS ADOPTED. Talking about it was never taboo; my mom would work the fact into my bedtime stories. But my parents waited until I was 7 years old to hand me a piece of information that stunned me. It was a Washington Post article dated September 6, 1988, about a newborn who’d been abandoned in a hospital bathroom. A janitor had come in with his mop and saw a bundle move on the floor. That bundle was me—clean, fed, and warm, but alone.

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No security camera had captured an image of how I wound up there, so my birth mother’s identity was a mystery. I was put into foster care, and three months later, my parents adopted me. I grew up an only child, which occasionally annoyed the hell out of me. I’d get angry and complain,“Everyone else has a brother and sister—why don’t I?”

The site had found a relative who shared my DNA.

When 23andMe became popular, my husband encouraged me to try it. So for Christmas 2017, we both got the kit. When my results arrived, I was glad to have more info on my genetic makeup and some basic medical facts. But 23andMe wasn’t done. A couple of months later, I received an email: The site had found a relative who shared my DNA. When I logged on, there was a name, Sterling, highlighted in purple, and next to that it identified her as my half sibling—on my maternal side. I turned to my husband, frozen in shock.

My half sister was even more surprised: She was one of four siblings, none of whom knew I existed. They all were raised by our mom, who hid her pregnancy with me because it was the product of an affair while her husband was stationed abroad in the army. She gave birth, stuck me in a safe place, and was home in time for the 6 o’clock news.

She and I still don’t have a relationship, and my siblings are not in contact with her, either. I’ve forgiven her, but don’t plan to reach out. At this point, it’s up to her if she wants to reconnect. But I met my sisters and brothers for the first time last May. And though they were technically strangers, it wasn’t strange—these people look like me, sound like me, have my smile. We made a pact to see each other at least once a month, and we’ve stuck to it; we send video messages daily, and I vacationed with one of my brothers in Jamaica in September. We’re catching up on the past few decades of our lives—the prom stories and favorite movies —and trying to do it as quickly as possible so we can move forward and make memories together. Sometimes I still can’t process my joy: I woke up one morning an only child, and I went to bed the second youngest of five. —Sally Armstrong, as told to M.S.

Home Is Where The Foster Parent Is

When Davion Only’s story made national headlines in 2013, heartstrings across the country were forcefully tugged—the then 15-year-old had spent his entire life in foster care and had made a sorrowful plea at a Florida Baptist church: Adopt me. “I’ll take anyone,” he said. “Old or young, dad or mom, black, white, purple, I don’t care. And I would be really appreciative; the best I could be.” Roughly 10,000 families offered him a permanent home; his foster agency placed him with one in Ohio and everyone was utterly relieved—until the arrangement failed. “He was sent back to Florida, to ‘age out’ of the system,” says Connie Going, who had been the adoption administrator at the agency and known Davion most of his life. “When he called me and asked, ‘Will you adopt me, Ms. Connie?’ I said, ‘Absolutely.’”

Going, 56, has spent more than 25 years working in the child welfare system, and Davion is one of two former fosters she’s adopted—when she adopted her son Taylor at age 12, he’d been in more than 47 homes. The boys are part of a speedily growing group: “There’s a desperate need for foster families right now,” says Going. “Because of the increase in opioid use and children being removed from homes by social services, they’re coming into foster care at higher rates than ever; they’re sleeping in offices.

Thousands of kids in the U.S. are waiting for families to take them in. Are you ready to change someone's life?

More than 120,000 foster children are waiting to be adopted.” While fostering may seem intimidating, Going says the challenges are nothing compared to the rewards. “I used to look at foster parents and think, I could never do that,” she says. “And yes, at moments, I’ve shut the bedroom door and cried. But I’m here to say that you can do this. If you have love in your heart and can offer unconditional acceptance, you will not fail.”

For those curious about the process, Going offers some sage advice:

  • Immerse yourself. “Follow foster moms’ social media accounts (try searching #fostermom on Instagram), and join online forums about fostering (visit dailystrength.org or adoption.com ). If there’s an in-person informational or support group in your town, show up and ask questions.”
  • Prepare to be patient. “To become a foster parent, you first must attend training classes. Next, a case manager comes to your house for an assessment and in-person interviews. The state does background checks, and then, if you’ve met all the requirements, you should get your foster placement. The process often takes around five months—in some states, longer. The barriers and safeguards are created with the kids’ well-being in mind.”
  • Self-assess. “The ideal foster parent or parents should be stable in who they are. If you have a challenging family history that you’ve processed and overcome, you’ll likely understand the kids better. Some of the strongest candidates have parented before, like empty nesters.”
  • Accept impermanence. “Around half of foster parents end up adopting, but there’s still a chance a biological family member could step back in at the last minute. The first goal in foster care is always reunification with the original family. And while I adopted my boys, they are not ‘mine’: I share them with their birth parents. I’ve even located those family members for them, because I knew it would help make them whole.”
  • Emphasize empathy. “When kids act out, remember that it’s the result of trauma. Think about it this way: They’re so resilient and brave that they’re taking the chance to connect with another human being after everyone else has let them down. It’s our privilege to step in and make their lives better.”

ANYONE PASSING MY HOUSE at 7 a.m. on a typical weekday in 2014 might have wondered why a man in pajama pants was climbing my front steps with a package of sandwich meat in one hand and a blender full of fruit in the other. But for our family, this was morning as usual. The man sporting slippers and smoothie fixings? My ex-husband, Derek, simply crossing the driveway that separated our two homes to help get our kids off to school.

This was a post-divorce life we could reconcile.

When we split up in 2008, Derek and I managed the first year under the same roof, with him in our home’s basement apartment. But we struggled to devise a more permanent arrangement that wouldn’t distance either of us from our two boys, at the time just 6 and 2. Then, in a blessed bit of real estate serendipity, the house next to ours came up for rent. We hugged in relief. This, we figured, was a kind of post-divorce life we could reconcile—maybe even be proud of one day.

Being next-door neighbors for eight years meant our boys moved back and forth fluidly—no packing or commuting necessary. If a permission slip or baseball glove was left behind, a quick text was all it took to arrange delivery to either front porch. Visible from both kitchen windows, the basketball hoop out back was the midpoint between our homes. Their dad or I could call out good morning or praise a newly mastered jump shot, no matter which of us was technically in charge that day. Our adjoining backyards became a well-worn loop for our sons and their friends during epic water-gun battles and games of tag. We liked this arrangement so much that it continued for four years after Derek married Amy in 2013.

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They moved a couple of blocks away in 2018, but not, as you might expect, because the grown-ups had tired of bumping into one another in bathrobes while fetching the paper. In our hot real estate market, the landlord decided to sell the place they were renting. Sure, there were times early on when I stood in the driveway waving a cheerful goodbye but noticing—with mixed feelings—how much like a family the four of them looked when departing for a weekend away. But those moments were far exceeded by all the bonus hellos our proximity allowed—and by how forgiving it was of our tendency to misplace coats, shoes, and retainers. Plus, we are a family now, the five of us, Amy included.

Today, we still cause confusion when all three parents show up to a weekend basketball tournament, but we’re fine with it. (My boyfriend, Ryan, and his son and daughter are yet more welcome additions to our lives.) No, this wasn’t what Derek and I imagined when we started a family, but we’re happy with our solution—and how we’ve put ourselves back together again, stronger than before. —Brandie Weikle, founder of TheNewFamily.com , a website that aims to document a thousand ways to be a family through its 1,000 Families Project and podcast

For the Record

Genealogist Crista Cowan has been fascinated by family history research since the mid-’80s, when she helped her dad enter info about their kin into the home computer. “That was all it took,” she says. “I was hooked.”

Unlock the secrets of your ancestors with keystrokes, DNA, and a dream.

Whether you’re hoping to untangle a mystery or get better acquainted with your foremothers, Cowan, who’s the corporate genealogist at Ancestry.com , says your first stop should always be a mail-in DNA test . But for an extra info boost, check out these sites she uses to fill in the blanks:

  • Find a Grave : “A worldwide community that takes pictures of tombstones and cemeteries, then uploads those photos and transcribes what’s on the tombstone. There are more than 170 million searchable memorials containing details about birth dates, death dates, and burial locations.” ( findagrave.com )
  • Fold3 : “A repository of military records from around the world: You’ll find everything from photos to enrollment cards.” ( fold3.com )
  • Newspapers.com : “Small-town papers were the Facebook of their day. Search where your ancestors lived and get details on births, marriages, and deaths—and information about charitable acts, political and religious affiliations, and more. Information I’ve found here has helped me break through many research ‘brick walls.’” ( newspapers.com )
  • RootsWeb : “One of the largest free genealogy resources on the internet. Check out the Family History Wiki, which contains guides to interpreting census and immigration records, and includes links to state archives, libraries, and other government repositories.”( rootsweb.com )

Becky Fawcett found her purpose after finding out she was infertile . “My husband and I adopted both our children,” she says. “I was actually in the delivery room when our son came into the world 13 years ago.” But given the legal fees, travel expenses, and state-mandated evaluations, the financial toll of that first adoption—about $40,000 in total—was massive. “It took every penny we had,” she says.“I said to my husband, ‘My God, we’re so lucky to have been able to make that work.’”

The nonprofit HelpUsAdopt.org gives hopeful families what they need, when they need it most.

Feeling compelled to give back, Fawcett, then a publicist, hunted for programs giving grants to aspiring parents, in the hope of doing some pro bono work. “But I felt totally defeated by the organizations I found,” says Fawcett. They often wouldn’t work with single or LGBT parents, or people in interracial relationships , and supported only one religious group. “I was pretty shocked at the lack of inclusivity. How can you tell someone they don’t deserve help because of the god they worship? Or their marital status? And what did that mean for the kids who’d be great family members if only the money was around?”

The most emotional moments are when people send me baby pictures.

Fawcett dove into online research; wrote up a business plan; and, in June 2007, sent out about 1,300 letters announcing her new nonprofit, HelpUsAdopt.org , which offers grants to all types of families. The idea clearly resonated, as she discovered a week later when she started receiving envelopes in the mail with checks inside—one for $15,000.

The organization has since awarded almost $2.6 million to nearly 300 families. Fawcett (who’s also the proud mom of a 9-year-old daughter) stays in touch with many of the families who’ve received grants. “The most emotional moments are when people send me baby pictures,” she says. “And last Mother’s Day, I wrote a Facebook post saying how grateful I was to my children’s birth mothers. One grant recipient commented, ‘I’m so grateful to read your story, Becky—without yours, I wouldn’t have mine.’ I get goosebumps just thinking about it.”

This story originally appeared in the March 2019 issue of O.

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What my Family Means to me

This essay about what my family means to me explores the profound impact of familial relationships on personal development and identity. It describes family as a source of unconditional support and security, providing stability in a rapidly changing world. The essay highlights how family has been instrumental in instilling core values such as honesty, integrity, and compassion, which are learned through daily interactions and modeled behaviors. Additionally, it discusses the role of family in connecting me to my cultural heritage and shared history, enriching my sense of identity and belonging. The essay also acknowledges the complexity of family dynamics, noting how they challenge personal growth through conflict resolution and understanding different perspectives. Overall, it portrays family as both a sanctuary of love and a catalyst for personal development, emphasizing its multifaceted influence on my life.

How it works

The notion of kinship occupies a distinctive niche in the fabric of human existence, sculpted by individual narratives and cultural contexts. To me, familial bonds transcend mere social constructs; they epitomize the bedrock of my resilience, identity, and principles. In this discourse, I delve into the manifold significance of my familial ties, pondering upon their profound influence on my psyche and worldview.

At its essence, my familial circle embodies an oasis of constancy and affection. Amidst the ceaseless flux and caprice of existence, family imparts a semblance of permanence and solace.

Across the continuum of my life, my kinfolk have served as steadfast pillars of emotional sustenance. Be it the jubilation of triumphs or the travails of tribulations, the unwavering solidarity of my family forms a safety net, emboldening me to embrace risks and pursue aspirations with fortitude. This camaraderie, far from being solely emotive, permeates the quotidian fabric of existence, from quotidian rituals to profound milestones, fostering a bond that is both comforting and enriching.

Moreover, family plays an instrumental role in shaping ethical mores and values. My familial milieu has been instrumental in imparting cardinal virtues such as probity, rectitude, and empathy. These values, far from being pedagogically disseminated, are imbibed through the crucible of daily interactions and choices. Witnessing my progenitors navigate moral quandaries or espouse altruism in the face of adversity has provided tangible exemplars of ethical comportment and empathy. As I traverse the corridors of adulthood, these precepts assume an increasingly indelible imprint upon my personal and vocational trajectories, informing my conduct and decisions.

Furthermore, family serves as a repository of shared heritage and ancestral lore, anchoring me to a tapestry of historical legacies that transcend temporal confines. The oral sagas passed down through generations and the cultural rituals we observe serve as conduits between antiquity and posterity. These traditions and narratives augment my comprehension of my lineage, furnishing me with a sense of lineage and affinity. They also serve as poignant reminders of the vicissitudes and victories of my forebears, proffering perspective and inspiration.

However, the influence of family transcends mere nurturing support, ethical underpinnings, and cultural inheritance. It constitutes a crucible for personal evolution and maturation. Familial dynamics, akin to any intimate rapport, are replete with intricacies and exigencies that compel me to confront my fallibilities, foster compromise, and cultivate forgiveness. Through the crucible of familial interactions, I glean the art of conflict resolution, the art of articulating sentiments cogently, and the art of embracing divergent perspectives. These aptitudes are invaluable, not only enhancing my interpersonal liaisons but also enriching my engagement with the wider cosmos.

In summation, the import of family to me is multifaceted and profound. It embodies a melange of affection and succor, values and legacy, trials and transformation. My kin have indelibly sculpted my identity and worldview, fashioning me into the individual I am today. In essence, family constitutes my lodestar amidst the vicissitudes of existence, furnishing both solace and stimulus for personal growth. As I traverse the labyrinth of life, the wisdom and warmth bestowed by my familial cadre will assuredly steer and sustain me, underscoring the enduring resonance of these cardinal bonds.

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Essay about Family Values & Traditions: Prompts + Examples

A family values essay covers such topics as family traditions, customs, family history, and values.

A family values essay (or a family traditions essay) is a type of written assignment. It covers such topics as family traditions, customs, family history, and values. It is usually assigned to those who study sociology, culture, anthropology, and creative writing.

In this article, you will find:

  • 150 family values essay topics
  • Outline structure
  • Thesis statement examples
  • “Family values” essay sample
  • “Family traditions” essay sample
  • “What does family mean to you?” essay sample.

Learn how to write your college essay about family with our guide.

  • 👪 What Is a Family Values Essay about?
  • 💡 Topic Ideas
  • 📑 Outlining Your Essay️
  • 🏠️ Family Values: Essay Example
  • 🎃 Family Traditions: Essay Example
  • 😍 What Does Family Mean to You: Essay Example

👪 Family Values Essay: What Is It about?

What are family values.

Family values are usually associated with a traditional family. In western culture, it is called “ a nuclear family .”

A nuclear family represents a family with a husband, wife, and children living together.

The nuclear family became common in the 1960s – 1970s. That happened because of the post-war economic boom and the health service upgrade. That allowed elder relatives to live separately from their children.

These days, the nuclear family is no longer the most common type of family. There are various forms of families: 

  • Single-parent families
  • Non-married parents
  • Blended families
  • Couples with no children
  • Foster parents, etc.

How did the nuclear family become so wide-spread?

The nuclear family culture was mostly spread in western cultures. According to many historians, it was because of the Christian beliefs.

However, many people believe that Christianity was not the only reason. The industrial revolution also played a significant role.

Nowadays, the understanding of the term varies from person to person. It depends on their religious, personal, or cultural beliefs.

Family Values List

Cultural background plays a significant role in every family’s values. However, each family has its own customs and traditions as well.

The picture contains a list of 6 most common family values.

Some common types of family values include:

  • Having a sense of justice
  • Being honest
  • Being respectful to others
  • Being patient
  • Being responsible
  • Having courage
  • Participating in teamwork
  • Being generous
  • Volunteering
  • Being respectful
  • Featuring dignity
  • Demonstrating humanity
  • Saving salary
  • Prioritizing education
  • Doing your best at work
  • Maintaining respectful relationships with coworkers/classmates
  • Being caring
  • Willing to learn
  • Treating others with respect
  • Being modest
  • Family game nights
  • Family vacations
  • Family meals
  • Being patriotic
  • Being tolerant
  • Following the law
  • Being open-minded

💡 150 Family Values Essay Topics

If you find it challenging to choose a family values topic for your essay, here is the list of 150 topics.

  • Social family values and their impact on children.
  • Divorce: Psychological Effects on Children.
  • Do family values define your personality?
  • Toys, games, and gender socialization.
  • The correlation between teamwork and your upbringing.
  • Family Structure and Its Effects on Children.
  • What does honesty have to do with social values?
  • Solution Focused Therapy in Marriage and Family.
  • The importance of being respectful to others.
  • Parent-Child Relationships and Parental Authority.
  • Political family values and their impact on children.
  • Postpartum Depression Effect on Children Development.
  • The importance of patriotism.
  • Social factors and family issues.
  • Is being open-minded crucial in modern society?
  • Modern Society: American Family Values.
  • What role does tolerance play in modern society?
  • Does hard work identify your success?
  • Family involvement impact on student achievement.
  • Religious family values and their impact on children.
  • Native American Women Raising Children off the Reservation.
  • What does spiritual learning correlate with family values?
  • Modest relations and their importance.
  • The role of parental involvement.
  • What is violence, and why is it damaging?
  • Myths of the Gifted Children.
  • Work family values and their impact on children.
  • When Should Children Start School?
  • Does salary saving help your family?
  • Family as a System and Systems Theory.
  • Why should education be a priority?
  • Child-free families and their values.
  • Family violence effects on family members.
  • Why is doing your best work important for your family?
  • School-Family-Community Partnership Policies.
  • Moral values and their impact on children.
  • Does being trustworthy affect your family values?
  • Gender Inequality in the Study of the Family.
  • Can you add your value to the world?
  • Your responsibility and your family.
  • Family in the US culture and society.
  • Recreational family values and their impact.
  • Balancing a Career and Family Life for Women.
  • Family vacations and their effects on relationships.
  • Family meal and its impact on family traditions.
  • Children Play: Ingredient Needed in Children’s Learning.
  • Family prayer in religious families.
  • Family changes in American and African cultures.
  • Hugs impact on family ties.
  • Are bedtime stories important for children?
  • How Video Games Affect Children.
  • Do family game nights affect family bonding?
  • Divorce Remarriage and Children Questions.
  • What is the difference between tradition and heritage culture?
  • How Autistic Children Develop and Learn?
  • The true meaning of family values.
  • Egypt families in changed and traditional forms.
  • Does culture affect family values?
  • Are family values a part of heritage?
  • The Development of Secure and Insecure Attachments in Children.
  • Does supporting family traditions impact character traits?
  • Parents’ Accountability for Children’s Actions.
  • Does your country’s history affect your family’s values?
  • Do family traditions help with solving your family problems?
  • Impact of Domestic Violence on Children in the Classroom.
  • Does having business with your family affect your bonding?
  • Family as a social institution.
  • Different weekly family connections ideas and their impact.
  • Different monthly family connections ideas and their impact.
  • The importance of your family’s daily rituals.
  • Group and Family Therapies: Similarities and Differences.
  • Holiday family gatherings as an instrument of family bonding.
  • Should a family have separate family budgets?
  • Parental non-engagement in education.
  • Globalization and its impact on family values.
  • The difference between small town and big city family values.
  • Divorce and how it affects the children.
  • Child’s play observation and parent interview.
  • Family fights and their impact on the family atmosphere.
  • Why are personal boundaries important?
  • Single-parent family values.
  • Gender Differences in Caring About Children.
  • Does being an only child affect one’s empathy?
  • Grandparents’ involvement in children upbringing.
  • Use of Social Networks by Underage Children.
  • Same-sex marriage and its contribution to family values.
  • Does surrogacy correspond to family values?
  • Are women better parents than men?
  • Does the age gap between children affect their relationship?
  • Does having pets affect family bonding?
  • Parenting Gifted Children Successfully Score.
  • Having a hobby together and its impact.
  • Discuss living separately from your family.
  • Shopping together with your family and its impact on your family values.
  • Movie nights as a family tradition.
  • Parents’ perception of their children’s disability.
  • Does being in the same class affect children’s relationships?
  • Does sharing a room with your siblings affect your relationship?
  • Raising Awareness on the Importance of Preschool Education Among Parents.
  • Pros and cons of having a nanny.
  • Do gadgets affect your children’s social values?
  • The Role of Parents in Underage Alcohol Use and Abuse.
  • Pros and cons of homeschooling.
  • Limiting children’s Internet usage time and their personal boundaries.
  • Is having an heirloom important?
  • Divorce influence on children’s mental health.
  • Is daycare beneficial?
  • Should your parents-in-law be involved in your family?
  • Children’s Foster Care and Associated Problems.
  • Pets’ death and its impact on children’s social values.
  • Clinical Map of Family Therapy.
  • Passing of a relative and its impact on the family.
  • How Do Parents See the Influence of Social Media Advertisements on Their Children?
  • Relationship within a family with an adopted child.
  • Discuss naming your child after grandparents.
  • The Effects of Post-Divorce Relationships on Children.
  • Discuss the issue of spoiling children.
  • Discuss nuclear family values.
  • Parental Involvement in Second Language Learning.
  • Children’s toys and their impact on children’s values.
  • Discuss the children’s rivalry phenomenon.
  • Family Educational Rights & Privacy Act History.
  • Relationship between parents and its impact on children.
  • Lockdown and its impact on family values.
  • Financial status and children’s social values.
  • Do parents’ addictions affect children?
  • Corporal punishment and its effects on children.
  • Discuss step-parents’ relationship with children.
  • Severe diseases in the family and their impact.
  • Developing Family Relationship Skills to Prevent Substance Abuse Among Youth Population.
  • Arranged marriages and their family values.
  • Discuss the age gap in marriages.
  • The Effects of Parental Involvement on Student Achievement.
  • International families and their values.
  • Early marriages and their family values.
  • Parental Divorce Impact on Children’s Academic Success.
  • Discuss parenting and family structure after divorce.
  • Mental Illness in Children and Its Effects on Parents.
  • Discuss family roles and duties.
  • Healthy habits and their importance in the family.
  • Growing-up Family Experience and the Interpretive Style in Childhood Social Anxiety.
  • Discuss different family practices.
  • Dealing With Parents: Schools Problem.
  • Ancestors worship as a family value.
  • The importance of family speech.
  • Does the Sexual Orientation of Parents Matter?
  • Mutual respect as a core of a traditional family.
  • Experiential Family Psychotherapy.
  • Should the law protect the family values?
  • Family as a basic unit of society.

Couldn’t find the perfect topic for your paper? Use our essay topic generator !

📑 Family Values Essay Outline

The family values essay consists of an introduction, body, and conclusion. You can write your essay in five paragraphs:

  • One introductory paragraph
  • Three body paragraphs
  • One conclusion paragraph.

Family values or family history essay are usually no more than 1000 words long.

What do you write in each of them?

The introduction part should grab your reader’s attention. It includes the description of the topic you chose and your thesis statement. The thesis statement will be explained later on.
In the body part, you should elaborate on your thesis. You can give three different points (one for each paragraph) and support all of them. So, each body paragraph consists of your claim and evidence. Make sure to start each body paragraph with a . Topic sentence reveals your paragraph’s main idea. By reading it, your reader can understand what this paragraph will be about.
The conclusion should not be long. One paragraph is more than enough. In the conclusion part, you can sum up your essay and/or restate your thesis.

Learn more on the topic from our article that describes outline-making rules .

Thesis Statement about Family Values

The thesis statement is the main idea of your essay. It should be the last sentence of the introduction paragraph .

Why is a thesis statement essential?

It gives the reader an idea of what your essay is about.

The thesis statement should not just state your opinion but rather be argumentative. For the five-paragraph family values essay, you can express one point in your thesis statement.

Let’s take a look at good and bad thesis statement about family values templates.

Children with social values are respectful.Social values play a significant role in children’s ability to be respectful because they teach how to live in a society.
Everyone should be open-minded.Being open-minded is a crucial feature in modern society since every day brings something new to our lives.
Only educated people have a broad mind.Education plays a massive role in broadening one’s mind because we can learn something new.

Need a well-formulated thesis statement? You are welcome to use our thesis-making tool !

🏠️ Family Values Essay: Example & Writing Prompts

So, what do you write in your family values essay?

Start with choosing your topic. For this type of essay, it can be the following:

  • Your reflection about your family’s values
  • The most common family values in your country
  • Your opinion on family values.

Let’s say you want to write about your family values. What do you include in your essay?

First, introduce family values definition and write your thesis statement.

Then, in the body part, write about your family’s values and their impact on you (one for each paragraph).

Finally, sum up your essay.

Family Values Essay Sample: 250 Words

Every family has specific values that define children’s upbringing. My family is no different, as we believe that some of the most important values are honesty, generosity, and responsibility because they define your personality and attitude.
Being honest is an important character trait that can help you build strong relationships with others. Many children are taught that if they get into trouble, it is better not to hide it. If a person keeps that in mind since childhood, it will be much easier for them to communicate with others when they grow up.
Generosity is beneficial not only for others but also for yourself. It is essential to teach children to be generous because it can build a strong community. Human beings are social species. That is why we need to cooperate and help the ones in need. My family believes this is what being generous is about.
Being responsible can help you get through many things. If you are responsible, you are generally more reliable and confident. That can bring you better relationships with others as well. Not to mention that in adulthood, your responsibility can positively affect your work.
To sum up, even though each family might have different family values, they all have a common goal. Every parent wants their children to become good people with strong beliefs. If we all uphold these values, we will build a better community.

🎃 Family Traditions Essay: Example & Writing Prompts

Family traditions essay covers such topics as the following:

  • Family traditions in the USA (in England, in Spain, in Pakistan, etc.)
  • Traditions in my family
  • The importance of family traditions for children.
  • My favorite family traditions

After you decide on your essay topic, make an outline.

For the introduction part, make sure to introduce the traditions that you are going to write about. You can also mention the definition of traditions.

In the body part, introduce one tradition for each paragraph. Make sure to elaborate on why they are essential for you and your family.

Finally, sum up your essay in the conclusion part.

Family Traditions Essay Sample: 250 Words

Family traditions vary from country to country and from family to family. Some families go hiking together, read bedtime stories for children, and have family walks. As for my family, we have some annual traditions like celebrating holidays together, taking family trips, and having game nights.
Every Christmas and Thanksgiving, my family and I gather together to celebrate. We exchange gifts, have family dinner, and overall have a good time. We also like winter outdoor activities, so every Christmas we go ice-skating, skiing or snowboarding. Every year I’m looking forward to these holidays because I can spend some quality time with my family.
Every summer, my family and I go on a family trip. Although everyone is busy with their own work, we try to spend time travelling together. Last year we visited India. We went sightseeing, explored the temples, and ate delicious Indian food. This time helped us form stronger bond.
During our family reunions, we usually have family game nights. We love board games, so we spend some hours playing them. Although these games require competition, they only help maintain a good relationship within one family.
To sum up, I personally believe that family traditions are an irreplaceable part of people’s lives. You may see your family only a couple of times a year, but the time you spend together remains in your memory forever.

😍 What Does Family Mean to You Essay: Example & Writing Prompts

The family definition essay covers your opinion on family and its importance for you.

Some of the questions that can help you define your topic:

  • How has your family shaped your character?
  • How can you describe your upbringing?

In the introduction part, you can briefly cover the importance of family in modern society. Then make sure to state your thesis.

As for the body parts, you can highlight three main ideas of your essay (one for each paragraph).

Finally, sum up your essay in the conclusion part. Remember that you can restate your thesis statement here.

What Does Family Mean to You Essay Sample: 250 Words

Family plays one of the crucial roles in personal development because they form one’s character and points of view. My family had a significant influence on me and my personality in many ways.
My family’s values defined my character traits, such as being responsible and trustworthy, always doing my best at any given work, and being honest with others. These personal qualities always help me get through all the difficulties in my life.
I learned about being generous from my family, and I believe it can help me build my own family in the future. Generosity is about empathy for others. In my opinion, it is one of the essential features of not only family but of any community. So, I hope my future family can inherit this value.
Family traditions are the way to get away from your everyday routine and to spend some quality time. Everyone is busy with their own life. So, if I have some free time, it is always an excellent option to spend it with my family. Whether it is some national holiday or just a regular weekend, I try to have a family meal or take a family trip somewhere. It helps me unwind and gain some energy.
To sum up, every family has a significant influence on their children. If this influence is positive, the children will carry these values through their whole life and influence their children.

Now you have learned how to write your family values essay. What values have you got from your family? Let us know in the comments below!

❓ Family Values FAQ

Family values are the principles, traditions, and beliefs that are upheld in a family. They depend on family’s cultural, religious, and geographical background. They might be moral values, social values, work values, political values, recreational values, religious values, etc. These values are usually passed on to younger generations and may vary from family to family.

Why are family values important?

Family values are important because they have a strong impact on children’s upbringing. These values might influence children’s behavior, personality, attitude, and character traits. These can affect how the children are going to build their own families in the future.

What are Christian family values?

Some Christian family values are the following: 1. Sense of justice 2. Being thankful 3. Having wisdom 4. Being compassion 5. Willing to learn 6. Treating others with respect 7. Modesty

What are traditional family values?

Each family has its own values. However, they do have a lot of resemblances. Some traditional family values are the following: 1. Having responsibilities to your family 2. Being respectful to your family members 3. Not hurting your family members 4. Compromising

Essay about Family: What It Is and How to Nail It

what does the word family mean to you essay

Humans naturally seek belonging within families, finding comfort in knowing someone always cares. Yet, families can also stir up insecurities and mental health struggles.

Family dynamics continue to intrigue researchers across different fields. Every year, new studies explore how these relationships shape our minds and emotions.

In this article, our dissertation service will guide you through writing a family essay. You can also dive into our list of topics for inspiration and explore some standout examples to spark your creativity.

What is Family Essay

A family essay takes a close look at the bonds and experiences within families. It's a common academic assignment, especially in subjects like sociology, psychology, and literature.

What is Family Essay

So, what's involved exactly? Simply put, it's an exploration of what family signifies to you. You might reflect on cherished family memories or contemplate the portrayal of families in various media.

What sets a family essay apart is its personal touch. It allows you to express your own thoughts and experiences. Moreover, it's versatile – you can analyze family dynamics, reminisce about family customs, or explore other facets of familial life.

If you're feeling uncertain about how to write an essay about family, don't worry; you can explore different perspectives and select topics that resonate with various aspects of family life.

Tips For Writing An Essay On Family Topics

A family essay typically follows a free-form style, unless specified otherwise, and adheres to the classic 5-paragraph structure. As you jot down your thoughts, aim to infuse your essay with inspiration and the essence of creative writing, unless your family essay topics lean towards complexity or science.

Tips For Writing An Essay On Family Topics

Here are some easy-to-follow tips from our essay service experts:

  • Focus on a Specific Aspect: Instead of a broad overview, delve into a specific angle that piques your interest, such as exploring how birth order influences sibling dynamics or examining the evolving role of grandparents in modern families.
  • Share Personal Anecdotes: Start your family essay introduction with a personal touch by sharing stories from your own experiences. Whether it's about a favorite tradition, a special trip, or a tough time, these stories make your writing more interesting.
  • Use Real-life Examples: Illustrate your points with concrete examples or anecdotes. Draw from sources like movies, books, historical events, or personal interviews to bring your ideas to life.
  • Explore Cultural Diversity: Consider the diverse array of family structures across different cultures. Compare traditional values, extended family systems, or the unique hurdles faced by multicultural families.
  • Take a Stance: Engage with contentious topics such as homeschooling, reproductive technologies, or governmental policies impacting families. Ensure your arguments are supported by solid evidence.
  • Delve into Psychology: Explore the psychological underpinnings of family dynamics, touching on concepts like attachment theory, childhood trauma, or patterns of dysfunction within families.
  • Emphasize Positivity: Share uplifting stories of families overcoming adversity or discuss strategies for nurturing strong, supportive family bonds.
  • Offer Practical Solutions: Wrap up your essay by proposing actionable solutions to common family challenges, such as fostering better communication, achieving work-life balance, or advocating for family-friendly policies.

Family Essay Topics

When it comes to writing, essay topics about family are often considered easier because we're intimately familiar with our own families. The more you understand about your family dynamics, traditions, and experiences, the clearer your ideas become.

If you're feeling uninspired or unsure of where to start, don't worry! Below, we have compiled a list of good family essay topics to help get your creative juices flowing. Whether you're assigned this type of essay or simply want to explore the topic, these suggestions from our history essay writer are tailored to spark your imagination and prompt meaningful reflection on different aspects of family life.

So, take a moment to peruse the list. Choose the essay topics about family that resonate most with you. Then, dive in and start exploring your family's stories, traditions, and connections through your writing.

  • Supporting Family Through Tough Times
  • Staying Connected with Relatives
  • Empathy and Compassion in Family Life
  • Strengthening Bonds Through Family Gatherings
  • Quality Time with Family: How Vital Is It?
  • Navigating Family Relationships Across Generations
  • Learning Kindness and Generosity in a Large Family
  • Communication in Healthy Family Dynamics
  • Forgiveness in Family Conflict Resolution
  • Building Trust Among Extended Family
  • Defining Family in Today's World
  • Understanding Nuclear Family: Various Views and Cultural Differences
  • Understanding Family Dynamics: Relationships Within the Family Unit
  • What Defines a Family Member?
  • Modernizing the Nuclear Family Concept
  • Exploring Shared Beliefs Among Family Members
  • Evolution of the Concept of Family Love Over Time
  • Examining Family Expectations
  • Modern Standards and the Idea of an Ideal Family
  • Life Experiences and Perceptions of Family Life
  • Genetics and Extended Family Connections
  • Utilizing Family Trees for Ancestral Links
  • The Role of Younger Siblings in Family Dynamics
  • Tracing Family History Through Oral Tradition and Genealogy
  • Tracing Family Values Through Your Family Tree
  • Exploring Your Elder Sister's Legacy in the Family Tree
  • Connecting Daily Habits to Family History
  • Documenting and Preserving Your Family's Legacy
  • Navigating Online Records and DNA Testing for Family History
  • Tradition as a Tool for Family Resilience
  • Involving Family in Daily Life to Maintain Traditions
  • Creating New Traditions for a Small Family
  • The Role of Traditions in Family Happiness
  • Family Recipes and Bonding at House Parties
  • Quality Time: The Secret Tradition for Family Happiness
  • The Joy of Cousins Visiting for Christmas
  • Including Family in Birthday Celebrations
  • Balancing Traditions and Unconditional Love
  • Building Family Bonds Through Traditions

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Family Essay Example

For a better grasp of the essay on family, our team of skilled writers has crafted a great example. It looks into the subject matter, allowing you to explore and understand the intricacies involved in creating compelling family essays. So, check out our meticulously crafted sample to discover how to craft essays that are not only well-written but also thought-provoking and impactful.

Final Outlook

In wrapping up, let's remember: a family essay gives students a chance to showcase their academic skills and creativity by sharing personal stories. However, it's important to stick to academic standards when writing about these topics. We hope our list of topics sparked your creativity and got you on your way to a reflective journey. And if you hit a rough patch, you can just ask us to ' do my essay for me ' for top-notch results!

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FAQs on Writing an Essay about Family

Family essays seem like something school children could be assigned at elementary schools, but family is no less important than climate change for our society today, and therefore it is one of the most central research themes.

Below you will find a list of frequently asked questions on family-related topics. Before you conduct research, scroll through them and find out how to write an essay about your family.

How to Write an Essay About Your Family History?

How to write an essay about a family member, how to write an essay about family and roots, how to write an essay about the importance of family.

Daniel Parker

Daniel Parker

is a seasoned educational writer focusing on scholarship guidance, research papers, and various forms of academic essays including reflective and narrative essays. His expertise also extends to detailed case studies. A scholar with a background in English Literature and Education, Daniel’s work on EssayPro blog aims to support students in achieving academic excellence and securing scholarships. His hobbies include reading classic literature and participating in academic forums.

what does the word family mean to you essay

is an expert in nursing and healthcare, with a strong background in history, law, and literature. Holding advanced degrees in nursing and public health, his analytical approach and comprehensive knowledge help students navigate complex topics. On EssayPro blog, Adam provides insightful articles on everything from historical analysis to the intricacies of healthcare policies. In his downtime, he enjoys historical documentaries and volunteering at local clinics.

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How Should I Go About Writing My Family Essay?: Examples and Tips

How Should I Go About Writing My Family Essay?: Examples and Tips

Family is an integral part of every individual's life. Delving into the intricate layers of family relationships and dynamics can yield a captivating essay. Here's a comprehensive guide with examples and tips to guide you through the process.

What Topics Should I Write About for My Family Essay?

Choosing the right topic is essential. Here are some suggestions:

Writing a Family Tree Dive into your roots! A family tree can be more than names and dates; it can narrate stories of ancestors, their challenges, achievements, and legacies. For instance, "When I looked into our family tree, I discovered that my great-grandfather was a sailor who traveled the world and had countless tales of adventures, some of which have become legendary bedtime stories in our family."

Describing My Family in My Essay Discuss each family member in detail. "My sister, with her fiery red hair and matching temper, is the exact opposite of my calm and analytical brother. Yet, when they come together, they create the most amazing music, with him on the piano and her singing."

Writing About a Personal Memory Share a poignant memory. "I remember the time when our cat, Whiskers, went missing. The entire family turned detectives overnight, searching for clues, putting up posters, and even setting up a 'cat trap' with her favorite treats. The adventure ended with Whiskers found sleeping peacefully in the neighbor's shed, unaware of the chaos she had caused."

Dos and Don’ts When Writing a Family Stories Essay

  • Be authentic.
  • Use vivid descriptions and dialogues.
  • Respect privacy; ask permission if sharing personal details.
  • Avoid making generalizations.
  • Refrain from being overly negative or critical.
  • Don't plagiarize; every family's story is unique.

Frequently Asked Questions

  • What is a good hook for an essay on my family? As Tolstoy once said, 'All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.' Our family, though, has found its unique shade of happiness.
  • What should I include in an essay about me and my family? Descriptions of family members, memories, traditions, challenges, and lessons.
  • How should I start an essay all about my family? Every time I think of the word 'home,' an image of our old cottage, Sunday dinners, and loud family debates comes to mind.
  • How long should my essay about my family be? Length depends on the requirement; academic essays typically range from 500-1000 words, while personal essays can vary.
  • How do I make my family essay engaging? Incorporate stories, memories, and emotions.
  • Is it okay to discuss family challenges in my essay? Yes, but be sensitive and respectful.
  • Can I add humor to my family essay? Yes, as long as it's in good taste.

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What is the Family? Definition Essay

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Introduction

Critical analysis, reference list.

In the human perspective, a family is a group of persons connected by kinship, compassion, or sharing of residence. In a number of societies, the family is the basic unit for the socialization of children. A basic family unit is made up of a father, mother, and children, and is known as a nuclear family, however, this unit can be extended to include other relations to be known as an extended family.

The concept of the family has undergone a transformation and in today’s society, many people define the family structure as an arbitrary cultural set-up, a statement could be partially true. In ancient times, the family was a closely-knit, patriarchal clan consisting of a man, his wife or wives, and several children!

This has changed to include a monogamous parent taking care of the children. Besides, certain concepts of the family have broken with tradition within specific communities while some have been implanted through migration to thrive or else disappear in the new communities and societies.

Current debates and interest concerning the family have forced individuals to reassess themselves in a society driven by change and uncertainty. Because of its intricate nature, sociologists have not succeeded in coming with a universal definition of what family is and how is constructed. Rather, the definition is subject to individual interpretation and depends on the value a person attaches to being a member of a communal social group.

The aim of the paper is to give a concise definition of family, and the context of family structures such as the traditional family; single parent family, blended family and cohabiting relationship families. The paper also examines the influences that have progressively shaped the concept of family from the past to the present day.

A family is generally defined as a group of individuals who are linked by kinship or adoption, and who have a common residence. (Germov and Poole, 2011, 132). Kinship ties are connections or associations that link individuals through genealogy lines or marriage.

However, a few writers disagree with this concept. For instance, George Murdock, an American anthropologist, defines family as a social group that lives together, support each other economically, and raise children (Germov and Poole, 2011, 128).

In the mid 20 th century, sociologists defined family as a man living together with his wife and children, joined by blood, marriage or adoption. The couple had sex, procreated, and cared for the children jointly, besides bringing resources such as money and food together. The family members also guarded and supported each other.

Again, some writers have given a different perspective. Some asserted that previous definitions of the concept of the family should be altered as they are founded on ‘monolithic’ models that exhibit partiality towards a specific kind of family typified by gender discrimination and legal attachment, instead of gender fairness and patterns of care or emotional response.

Besides, modern reproductive methods have changed family associations and the definition of terms such as ‘mother’ and ‘father’ gas considerably changed. For instance, women past their menopausal age can now have children through surrogate mothers. Consequently, an increasing number of studies are focusing on what really defines a family. This perspective overlooks the gender inclination of the couple and the legitimacy of the relationship, and centers rather on the patterns of caring and affection.

The concept of the family has been conventionally related to the traditional family setup, which can be defined as a relationship in the children live with both the biological parents with the father often at work while the mother stays at home (Germov & Poole, 2011, 128). Today less than ten percent of families satisfies this principle.

The second approach is that of single parent setup in which the child resides with one of the parents, and may result from death, divorce, separation, out-of-wedlock pregnancy, or a nonunion pregnancy. Milstead and Perkins (2010, para. 8) recognized that teenage mothers were less likely to enter marriage and preferred to care for the child without paternal help leading to certain social and economic deficits for both the mother and child including lack of proper education, poorly paying occupations, reliance on welfare, and bad health for both of them.

The third approach is that of a blended family, in which the child lives with one of the biological parents, and that parent’s partner. This type of family may also include children born to the new couple. This family setup is made up of children, one of the biological parents, and a stepparent (Kinnear, 2010, 8). Even though the availability of another adult may lead to more material and financial resources, studies indicate that such children may be more disadvantaged than those living in stable single-parent families. In fact, children living in blended families have a higher likelihood of suffering emotionally and/or psychologically than those in single parent families.

The fourth perspective is that of a cohabiting relationship, in which a child lives with one of the biological parents, and that parent’s significant other, however, in contrast to blended families, the adults are not married. This type of family has been on the rise and a possible explanation could be that couples take it as a good practice before marriage. In contrast, Joltes (2007, para. 2) notes that those who have cohabited are more likely to divorce than those who have not. Cohabiting families regularly create less defined family roles, lower levels of parental support, supervision and involvement, and more conflicts (Kinnear, 2010, 8).

In contrast from the family setups described above, the traditional family is characterized by a unit comprising of a married couple with two or more children. In this setup, the male adult is the head of the house and the breadwinner too, while the female adult performs household tasks and cares for children and her husband.

Back then, the gender roles were clear. Most (preferably all) members of the family attended a church service weekly. Children were obedient, respectful and responsible. Families resided in the same town, or at least close to each other. Instances of divorce were an abomination and were very rare. Unmarried couples were uncommon too, and the act was thought of as shameful (Briggs, 2002, 5).

The number of unmarried adults was very low. The 1950s was a period when everybody worked together towards a common goal; society was stable or improving, and disagreements extremely rare. Women were satisfied with their housekeeping roles and respected their husbands as the house heads. Similarly, it was generally accepted that homosexuality, divorce, sex before marriage, abortion, and illegitimate birth did not exist, or occurred only to ‘bad’ families. Indeed, such issues were never conversed in an open forum.

For instance, women living in Australia in the 1950s had their lives centred on family and housekeeping tasks. Women who held wartime jobs were supposed to quit their jobs to create opportunities for men who had previously been in war. Consequently, women quit their jobs and returned to their housekeeping tasks. However, a few women challenged these norms and retained their jobs, but were paid less than men for similar jobs and were often given lowly paying jobs.

The practices in the traditional family have transformed significantly, and it is unlikely that we will ever switch back to the conventional nuclear family as the only ideal type of family. For the near future, the new family setup is here to stay. The ‘cereal packet’ image of the family comprising of the father, mother, and the children joyously having breakfast together is a bad reminder of how single-parent, blended, extended, same-sex, or childless families have considerably dented the idea of a perfect family.

Add this to the effects of the multiplicity of ethnic and cultural origins, aboriginal Australians and post-war migrations, and all Australians will finally encounter family forms quite dissimilar from their own. In Australia, as in many societies, the nuclear family setup is no longer conventional.

Towards the end of the 20th century, major demographic changes had affected even the family setup. Societies were aging while the number of children and youths was diminishing. These anomalies led to a shift in roles that today challenge the traditional family setup.

Today, families may comprise of couples who may be married or cohabiting, and have a child who is either a co-resident. A new form of family setup emerged in the 21st century, as mentioned by Anthony Giddens and Ulrich Beck. The two sociologists write that from the mid 70s onwards, significant changes occurred in family life and relationships; marriage rates were failing, divorce was on the increase, and fertility rates dropping. According to Saggers and Sims (2004, 34), these changes marked the end of the family.

While often referred to as a ‘haven in a heartless world’, the fact is that families cannot be insulated from the world of which we are a component. In fact, change in the family stricture has always been inherently linked to wider social changes. As society undergoes swift, turbulent and far-reaching changes in economic, cultural and political aspects, family keeps pace with the changes (Saggers and Sims, 2004, 32).

The family, as we once knew it, has undergone rapid transformations and is today a shadow of its former self. Previously unacceptable behaviors such as homosexuality and same-sex families are now welcomed in the family. Consequently, these unnatural acts have further deteriorated the family by causing same-sex families, which raises important sociological questions about the actual meaning of the term ‘family’.

Secondly, the rising number of women in the workforce has altered the basic roles of members of the family. Divorce and separation, once abhorred, is now a normal affair. Indeed, parental divorce disrupts the lives of almost one in five Australian children. Cohabiting has also found its way into the modern family, and this has resulted into a popular and often quoted belief that the Australian family is disintegrating.

While the social construct of the family has evolved to cater for the social pressures of modern life, the values attached to it are perhaps more enduring. While the concept of the family is multifaceted, perhaps it comes down to the individuals belonging to any particular family group, who seek the similar values of belonging and compassion that offer a true definition of what a family is.

Briggs, Freda. 2002. The changing family, from Children and Families : Australian Perspectives , Sydney: Allen & Unwin.

Joltes, Richard. 2007. Critical Enquiry: Family Values . Web.

Kinnear, Pamela. 2002. New families for changing times . Discussion Paper No 47. Web.

Milstead, Kayla & Perkins, Gerra. 2010. Family structure Characteristics and academic success: Supporting the work of school counsellors. Academic Leadership, Vol 8, issue 4. Web.

Poole, Marylin & Germov John. 2011. Public Sociology, An introduction to Australian Society , 2nd edition, Sydney: Allen & Unwin.

Saggers, Sherry and Sims, Margaret. 2004. Diversity: Beyond the nuclear family , Edited by Marilyn Poole, Sydney: Allen & Unwin.

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30+ Great Argumentative Essay Topics About Family with Essay prompts

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  • July 31, 2022
  • Essay Topics and Ideas , Nursing

To help you get started with argumentative essay writing, we’ve compiled a list of some potential argumentative Essay Topics About Family. Whether you’re looking for something lighthearted or something a little more serious, we’re sure you’ll find something on this list on Topics About Family with essay prompts

Argumentative Essay Topics About Family with prompts

  • My Attitudes Towards Marriage And Family

Essay prompt:  Marriage, also recognized as a wedlock or matrimony to others, is regarded as the bottom-most unit in the social setting community is viewed differently by people.

  • Impact of Family-Centered Care on an Autistic Patient

Essay prompt:  According to the Institute of Medicine, patient-centered care is health care that respects and responds to individual patient values, needs, and preferences. On the other hand, family-centered care involves a partnership between a family and a care provider in making health care decisions.

  • Family and Friends in Life

Essay prompt:  Everyone comes from a family, which no one chooses at birth. However, individuals are privileged to select people they want to be their friends. Family members and friends are important in life since they enable them to overcome various challenges and find happiness through healthy interactions and social.

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  • Family Structures. What is a definition of family?

Essay prompt:  Traditional notions of families have greatly evolved in recent years. What used to be a father, mother and children relationship has changed to accommodate polygamy, adoptive children, and extended family members as one.

  • What Does Family Mean To You Essay

Essay prompt:  According to me, family means a lot. A family has different meanings such as by definition, friendship, and convenience. Regarding definition, family involves the people that I am related to by blood. What does family mean to you?

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  • Process philosophy and family and marriage

Essay prompt:  In discussing one of these topics, the goal is to relate how a particular political perspective derives from process philosophy (such as socialism). In making the connection, incorporate clear references from the required reading.

  • Family System Theory

Essay prompt:  Family system theory primarily emphasis on behavioral exchange at any given instance of interaction with family members. The theory supports that the sequence of the interrelationship between members of the family inspires, maintains and prolongs the problem and non-problematic manners.

  • Different Family Structures, Nontraditional Family Structures, and Family Systems Theory

Essay prompt:  Today’s generation seems to have a more complex perspective of the world, but much clearer than before. Having these in mind, people do seem to slowly accept and readapt to these great changes that improve their perception of society today.

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  • Ethnography. A Comparison Between Zulu Culture And American Culture.

Essay prompt:  In this analysis you may include a discussion of topics such as: economic/labor role, parenthood, child-rearing, marriage/divorce practices, reproductive issues, sexuality, family/kinship structure, household composition, or other topics that may be relevant in the book you read.

  • Causes and Effects of Unemployment on the family

Essay prompt:  One of the most increasing issue in the families has become Unemployment, with Shelter, food and clothing topics being largely highlighted, Unemployment has now become a topic of discussion in the family. It is not only the bread winners that feel the loss of lively hood but also the young professionals …

  • Family Resource Management Education Term Paper Essay

Essay prompt:  I decided to work on Family Resource Management. This is a very interesting and sensitive area that I think needs to be emphasized much more than the other FLE areas. This is because the basis of any life existence starts from the family set up.

  • Marriage and Roles of Women in the Family Portrayed in Mrs. Mallard’s and Mrs. Pontellier

Essay prompt:  The concept of family has been viewed and analyzed from different perspectives across diverse societies all over the world. Most scholars define a family as an entity to different people, in different localities at different periods.

  • The Family Of Man In The Society

Essay prompt:  The modern individual in the society is more aware than before as knowledge has increased and activism has been accepted as one of the ways to solve and express an individual’s opinions and problems.

Find out more on  Argumentative Essay Topics About Social Media [Updated]

  • Importance of Family Health and The Strategies for Health Promotion

Essay prompt:  Family is a crucial institution in the healthcare sector. The concept of family health is significant in devising a treatment plan for patients and offering healthcare prescriptions. Is family health important? Consider the various strategies for health promotion . How does a nurse determine which strategy to use on family health promotion?

  • Significance of Family values (argumentative Essay Topics About Family)

Essay prompt:  In the past, the family was considered a social unit consisting of one or more parents with their children. Today, the definition of family has changed to encompass various family structures.

  • Opinion Writing About Can A Blended Family Be Successful?

Essay prompt:  A blended family can be successful when the parents and the children are able to identify the blind spots and tackle the challenges that may bring disharmony on family unity.

  • Basic Techniques of Family Therapy Psychology Essay

Essay prompt:  Family therapy can be carried out in various ways. Moreover, alternatives to every aspect of the process exist. However, some guidelines are shared by all the approaches. They serve as the core framework for clinical practice. Family therapy occurs in stages.

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  • Difference between Pacific and European Families in Family Structure and Authority

Essay prompt:  Difference between Pacific and European Families in Family Structure and Authority Literature and Language Essay.

  • The Greatest Of The Franciscan Values (argumentative Essay Topics About Family)

Essay prompt:  1) Live lovingly. 2) Care for creation. 3) Proclaim joy and hope. 4) Be living instruments of peace to all our brothers and sisters in God’s family.

  • Addiction as a product of Social Dislocation and Family Stress.

Essay prompt:  Societal addiction to drug and substance use has, and still is, a menace to our human society, prompting extreme measures to be put in place to not only curb, but also try to eradicate the problem.

Here are additional 60+ Top And Best Argumentative Essay Topics For Different Contexts

  • Marriage and Family Counselling

Essay prompt:  Family systems have become more complex over time. Some of the systems that did not exist in the past include gay families, childless families, and single-parent families, among others.

  • Family Relations and Child-Rearing Practices: How They Changed Postmigration

Essay prompt:  Migrating to another country or place with a completely different culture affects the whole lives of the family. However, while the most obvious difficulties that they face are those concerning with how they deal with other people, it also affects how each member deal with each other such as how they rear.

  • The Form and Function of Family

Essay prompt:  The definition of family is a fundamental aspect of diverse medical disciplines. Since this definition shifts from one nation to another and within the countries due to the current times’ shifting realities, experts have suggested redefining this concept to integrate the diverse modern-day family. What is a definition of family that encompasses the different Family structures prevalent today?

  • Cognitive-behavioral Family Therapy and Multi-dimensional Family Therapy

Essay prompt:  Populations at risk are considered the populations exposed to the risk of occurrence of a particular event in life. These populations need to be treated differently from other populations to reduce their risk of falling victim to the described event. (argumentative Essay Topics About Family)

  • Importance of Functional Theory in Understanding Families

Essay prompt:  One of the critical topics I studied is the institution of the family. Family is an essential social unit making up the overall society. Family is examinable under various sociological views on contemporary families, including functional, conflict, and social interactionist approaches.

  • Family: How Has It Been Portrayed Through The Arts And In Real Life?
  • Essay prompt:  Reflect on what the word family means and think about how it has been portrayed through the arts and in real life. A family is one of the greatest assets that life gifts each one of us with. It is all we are left with when everything else is gone.
  • What Family characteristics may contribute to potential or actual dysfunctional health patterns

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The given prompt: Beyond blood relations, how has the concept of family evolved in contemporary culture?

In traditional terms, a family often conjured images of a group connected by the intricate web of blood relations: parents, siblings, and extended kin. However, as the hands of time have ticked forward, the idea of family has undergone a significant evolution, particularly in contemporary culture.

In today’s world, the essence of family is not restricted solely to genetic ties. Instead, it blossoms in the spaces of shared experiences, mutual care, love, and most importantly, genuine connection. The idea that “blood is thicker than water” has been both challenged and redefined as people create familial bonds with those they aren’t biologically related to.

With the rise in diverse living situations, it’s common to find families where members aren’t linked by DNA. Adoptive families are a testament to the idea that the foundations of family go beyond genes. Here, connections are forged with love, understanding, and a mutual commitment to each other’s well-being. Similarly, stepfamilies and blended families break the mold of the traditional family unit, proving that genuine relationships can flourish in spaces beyond blood ties.

Moreover, the concept of “chosen families” has gained prominence, especially within communities that value deep-rooted friendships and bonds. In many instances, individuals, due to various reasons, may become estranged from their biological families. In the void that this creates, they often find solace, support, and a sense of belonging with friends or mentors, essentially building a family by choice, not by birth.

Another dimension of the evolving family concept is the recognition and acceptance of families with same-sex parents. As societies grow more inclusive, the narrative around family has expanded to honor and celebrate diverse family structures. In these families, just as in any other, love, care, and shared responsibilities define the bond.

Cultural exchanges, travel, and global communication have also played a role in reshaping the family’s notion. In an interconnected world, individuals from different corners of the globe meet, bond, and form families, blending cultures, traditions, and values. These intercultural families are beautiful tapestries of shared stories and united dreams.

However, with this expanded understanding of family, contemporary culture also brings challenges. The acceptance of diverse family structures isn’t universal, and many face societal judgment. It underscores the importance of broadening perspectives and understanding that at the core of every family, irrespective of its structure, lie the universal values of love, support, and commitment.

In essence, the definition of family in today’s world is fluid, reflecting the cultural, societal, and individual shifts of our times. While blood relations will always hold significance, the boundaries of family have extended, warmly embracing all forms of genuine connection and mutual care.

As we navigate the complexities of modern life, these evolved family structures offer comfort, reminding us that family is less about who we share our genes with and more about who we share our lives with. In the heartbeats of these diverse families, we find the timeless rhythms of love, care, and belonging.

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what does the word family mean to you essay

Expanding the definition of family to reflect our realities

what does the word family mean to you essay

Associate Professor of Applied Human Sciences, Concordia University

what does the word family mean to you essay

Disclosure statement

Shannon Hebblethwaite receives funding from the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada (SSHRC), the Fonds de Recherche du Québec - Société et Culture (FRQSC), the Fondation Luc Maurice, and TELUS Health.

Hilary Rose does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.

Concordia University provides funding as a founding partner of The Conversation CA.

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The second Monday in February is Family Day in parts of Canada. Started in Alberta in 1990 , four additional provinces celebrate Family Day: British Columbia, Saskatchewan, Ontario and New Brunswick. (Other provinces have holidays reflecting their heritage.)

Québec is one of few jurisdictions that does not have a civic holiday in February, though the province has generous family leave policies .

This year, to coincide with the emphasis on family, Concordia University and the Vanier Institute of the Family are hosting a conference on families and family life on Feb. 20. The conference will explore some of the tensions and dichotomies embedded in families. For one, how do we define what family means?

what does the word family mean to you essay

Expanding the definition of family

How we define family (and who gets to do that defining) is an important starting point for conversations on family life. Who’s in? Who’s out? Who actually counts as family? For some, family means married parents with children, or married heterosexual parents with children. For others, it may mean a chosen family, or a cohabiting couple with no children.

For our conference, we are using an adaptation of the Vanier Institute’s definition : a family consists of any combination of two or more people, bound together over time, by ties of mutual consent and/or birth, adoption or placement, and who take responsibility for various activities of daily living, including love.

Our research has identified the need to attend to extended families , including grandparents, aunts and uncles. It also includes the need to extend the definition of family to non-traditional family forms including LGBTQ2S+ families, chosen families, multi-generation families that include grandparents, single parents and people living alone.

It wasn’t until 2001 that Statistics Canada gathered information on multi-generational households, and in 2011 the census first counted stepfamilies and foster children. Families in Canada are diverse and our programs and policies should be responsive to this diversity.

We find that a narrow definition of family can neglect the experiences of single-parent, poor and minority families . For example, research shows that women of colour and low-income women often experience and interpret motherhood differently than white, class-privileged mothers.

what does the word family mean to you essay

Recently, researchers began to examine how diversity related to race, class and sexual orientation affects grandparent-grandchild relationships. To continue to expand our understanding of families’ experiences, we need to think more broadly about what factors matter in families.

Family realities should be reflected in policy

How we define family impacts social policy like parental, maternity and paternity leave entitlements and child-care tax credits . Caregiver benefits and compassionate leave policies are also tied to family status . Eligibility depends on whether you are a family member.

In health-care contexts, visitors in intensive care units and emergency departments are often restricted to immediate family and grandparents often don’t have rights when it comes to child custody cases. So a comprehensive definition of family influences how we develop programs for families and who is eligible.

Besides needing to expand the definition of family, we also need to look at the messy realities of family and family life. The irony of organizing a public family conference while attending to the realities of our private family lives was not lost on us. As we scheduled meetings and conference calls, we were also planning Skype dates, making school lunches and caring for parents across the country.

We believe that practitioners, service providers and policy-makers need to take into account the complexity of family lives when thinking about family practice, programs and policies. Family scholars and the Vanier Institute of the Family refer to using a family lens: needing to look at the complexity of family and family relations beyond individual family members.

Thinking about families in a broad sense when we develop programs and policies can be challenging. It is much easier to use an individual lens to think about developing children, or aging seniors. But these individual family members, even those who live on their own, live out their lives in the context of families —whether biological or social.

The future of families

When using a family lens, it can be easy to slip into a glass-half-empty approach. Family life educators and social workers struggle with the tension between deficit models of family, and asset or strength-based models of family. Instead of only focusing on what problems families experience, we can benefit from understanding what strengths they have and what makes them resilient in the face of life’s challenges.

Some family practitioners and family scholars would say that in the best of all possible worlds, it would be preferable to remain apolitical as we think about family and as we provide information and assistance to families.

And yet, some of us feel strongly that it is important to look beyond families to society to advocate on behalf of families, or family members, who are at risk.

At our families conference we will be exploring the tension between present and future. Based on our understanding of systems and systemic change, we will emphasize envisioning a different future by including all families — in the broadest sense.

Rather than staying focused on the present, we look towards a future of change by asking the question: “Wouldn’t it be great if …?”

  • Sexual orientation
  • Social work
  • Grandparents
  • women of colour

what does the word family mean to you essay

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What Family Really Means

Frank Bruni

By Frank Bruni

  • Oct. 24, 2015

what does the word family mean to you essay

MY friend Elli has never given birth, never adopted, never taken primary responsibility for an infant, a toddler or an adolescent.

But on the far side of 65, she finds herself playing the role of mother.

At the beginning of each school year, she’s likely to be helping one of her college-age boys move into his freshman dorm. At the end, she’s at a commencement, beaming as another of her boys finishes his four years and receives his diploma.

The boys are from Zimbabwe, where Elli has spent extensive time over the last decade and where she met many poor, bright teenagers determined to study in America.

She not only guided them through the application and financial aid process, but also remained one of the central figures in their lives.

And they became essential to her. They’re always calling and emailing. She’s always calling and emailing back. They consult her about the summer internships in their sights; they confide in her about new romances. And on holidays, they converge at her house to be fed and fussed over.

By any definition of the word that matters, she and her kids are a family.

And they kept coming to mind as I read about a gathering of more than 250 Roman Catholic leaders in Rome over the last three weeks for what’s been called the Synod of Bishops on the Family.

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