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My Personality Essay | Sample Essay on My Personality for Students and Children in English

June 23, 2021 by Prasanna

My Personality Essay: The personality of a person is the reflection of their good and bad habits. One should always develop good habits in himself/herself and avoid the bad ones. These habits make the personality of one person different from another. Your personality is what your character is. It comprises various trademark qualities and propensities which help me make a fair person. Certain parts of our personality are acceptable while there are other negative sides too. Notwithstanding, coming up next are the better parts of our character.

Knowing your personality characteristics and the capacity to portray them in a composed structure will help you in all parts of your life – from your first day in school until your last work. For example, one pragmatic use of such articles is to dazzle recruiting chiefs with your introductory letter and prospective employee meetings. Having the option to answer the “enlighten me concerning yourself” inquiry appropriately not just empowers you to respond to inquiries and clarify why you fit the expected set of responsibilities impeccably yet additionally assists you with exploring through your work-life and associations with your colleagues.

You can read more  Essay Writing  about articles, events, people, sports, technology many more.

Sample Essay on My Personality

Personality is one viewpoint that we as a whole are being dissected on. personality characterizes what our identity is and what we are. A few groups have extraordinary characters, while others might not have that satisfying and engaging character. We should continually have a decent personality to be a superior individual.

Personality lies in numerous things that we convey in ourselves. The manner in which we dress, the language we talk, how we act with others, our mentality, etc. The most significant of everything is the manner by which we handle a circumstance, utilizing legitimate cerebrums and thinking great. When in an emergency, as opposed to hopping into ends, one ought to consistently be prudent and think rapidly and admirably and afterward act in a like manner. This load includes as a part of our character.

Another significant factor is the way merry you are. We all really like to be in the organization of glad and bright individuals, similarly, individuals likewise anticipate something similar from us. Maybe then being miserable and ill-humored, when one is lively and tells wisecracks when in a group, they would be valued and acknowledged a lot quicker than the individuals who don’t end up falling in here.

Personality fundamentally duplicates what we have inside us. The attributes that one obtains throughout some stretch of time, fosters our character. The personality of one individual depends on a few elements. A few attributes are inherent, while others are acquired and some others actually being noticed, learned and joined while reaching out to others and circumstances around. In spite of the fact that a few characters are given to us as a gift, we reserve the privilege to sustain it and foster it for the advancement of ourselves and this would consequently reflect in our great personality as well.

One must be consistently satisfactory, presentable and sharp engaged in musings and acts, to be acknowledged and adored by all and to be in control of an individual with incredible character. Personality simply doesn’t occur incidentally, one necessity to have incredible devotion and pursue to foster societies and routines that would help in developing one’s character.

My Personality Small Paragraphs

Everybody has one, yet no two people groups characters are something very similar. Personality is for the most part what your identity is and the fundamental characteristics and convictions that an individual has. The word reference definition for Personality is A: The Sum complete of the physical, mental, passionate, and social attributes of a person. B: The coordinated example of conduct attributes of the person. A person’s personality is the manner by which he finds a way into society. Nobody has a similar personality to another. He may have comparative characteristics yet never can their characters be by and large something similar.

Personality consists of three sections: Biological Influence, Psychological Influence, and Social Influence. A people’s Biological Influence consists of somebody’s hereditarily decided demeanor and the autonomic sensory system and his mind action. Mental Influences are a person’s learned reactions, his oblivious perspectives and his hopeful or cynical perspective. The Social-Cultural impacts consist of youth encounters and people’s social assumptions and social help. As the year’s pass, life gets an ever-increasing number of confounded, particularly the adolescent years. Everybody’s characters are continually changing, which is normal due to the progressions that they carry on with throughout everyday life. Something that happens to them may change the manner in which they consider that circumstance for eternity.

FAQ’s on My Personality Essay

Question 1. How to write an essay on personality?

Answer: In the event that the exposition is about you, meet your loved ones about your character. Compose the blueprint for your exposition. Your presentation ought to clarify who you are expounding on and why you decided to zero in on that individual. The presentation ought to likewise diagram the central matters of your article.

Question 2. How to describe our personality?

Answer: Personality accepts states of mind, perspectives, and feelings and is most obviously communicated in associations with others. It incorporates conduct attributes, both intrinsic and gained, that recognize one individual from another and that can be seen in individuals’ relations to the climate and to the gathering of people.

Question 3. What is the best way to improve your personality?

• Be a superior audience
• Understand more and extend your inclinations
• Be a decent conversationalist
• Make decisions
• Meet New People
• Act naturally
• Have an inspirational perspective and demeanor
• Be fun and see the diverting side of life
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A List of Negative Personality Traits

Categories Personality

If you are curious about negative personality traits or looking for character traits for your writing, here is a list of options to consider.

Negative personality traits, often referred to as maladaptive or toxic traits, can impede personal growth, strain relationships, and contribute to an overall decline in mental and emotional well-being. These traits, such as narcissism, chronic pessimism, or excessive jealousy, can manifest in various forms, from subtle behaviors to overt actions.

They shape how individuals perceive the world, interact with others, and respond to challenges, often leading to conflicts, misunderstandings, and emotional turmoil. 

Understanding these traits is crucial, as it allows us to recognize and address them within ourselves and others, fostering healthier relationships and a more positive outlook on life. By identifying and mitigating these negative traits, you can improve your personal development and social interactions and create a more fulfilling existence.

Table of Contents

20 Negative Personality Traits

Everyone harbors some negative personality traits, and you might notice these traits in varying degrees within yourself. The extent to which they influence your behavior and life largely depends on their intensity and whether you possess other positive qualities to counterbalance them.

Recognizing and understanding these traits is the first step toward managing their impact and fostering a healthier, more balanced outlook on life.

• Narcissism : Excessive self-love and a lack of empathy for others.
• Pessimism : A tendency to see the worst aspect of things or believe the worst will happen.
• Jealousy : Envy of others’ success, possessions, or relationships.
• Aggressiveness : Hostile or violent behavior towards others.
• Manipulativeness : Controlling or influencing others for personal gain.
• Dishonesty : A tendency to lie or deceive.
• Selfishness : Prioritizing one’s own needs over others’.
• Stubbornness : Inflexibility and unwillingness to change one’s mind.
• Arrogance : An exaggerated sense of one’s own importance or abilities.
• Gossiping : Spreading rumors or talking negatively about others behind their backs.
• Impulsiveness : Acting without thought or consideration of consequences.
• Resentfulness : Holding grudges and being unable to forgive.
• Cynicism : Distrust of others’ motives and a general negativity.
• Laziness : A lack of willingness to work or exert effort.
• Insecurity : A lack of confidence that can manifest in various negative ways.
• Overly critical : Frequently finding fault in others.
• Entitlement : Believing one deserves special treatment or privileges.
• Apathy : Lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern.
• Controlling : Excessively seeking to manage or dominate others.
• Victim mentality : Consistently seeing oneself as a victim of circumstances.

These traits can significantly impact personal and professional relationships, leading to conflict and dissatisfaction. Recognizing and addressing them is vital for fostering healthier interactions and personal growth.

More Negative Character Traits

If you are looking for a longer list of negative traits, the following are some options to consider:

• Vindictive : Seeking revenge and holding onto grievances.
• Perfectionistic : Setting unattainably high standards and being overly critical of oneself and others.
• Defensive : Reacting aggressively to criticism or perceived slights.
• Overly competitive : Always needing to win or be the best, often at the expense of others.
• Overbearing : Imposing one’s will on others in an intrusive or domineering way.
• Judgmental : Quick to judge others harshly without understanding their circumstances.
• Aloof : Emotionally distant and uninterested in forming close relationships.
• Hypocritical : Behaving in a way that contradicts one’s stated beliefs or feelings.
• Paranoid : Suspicious and distrustful without justification.
• Greedy : Excessively desirous of wealth, possessions, or power.
• Materialistic : Overly focused on material possessions and wealth.
• Short-tempered : Easily angered and prone to outbursts of rage.
• Unreliable : Frequently failing to meet commitments or responsibilities.
• Petty : Concerned with trivial matters and quick to hold grudges over small issues.
• Egotistical : Having an inflated sense of one’s own importance and abilities.
• Rude : Disrespectful and impolite towards others.
• Self-destructive : Engaging in behaviors that are harmful to oneself.
• Overly dramatic : Exaggerating emotions and situations for attention.
• Neglectful : Failing to care for responsibilities or people dependent on one.
• Obnoxious : Unpleasant and irritating to others.
• Sullen : Bad-tempered and sulky; unwilling to be sociable.
• Secretive : Withholding information and being unnecessarily private.
• Smug : Excessively self-satisfied and arrogant.
• Cowardly : Lacking courage and overly fearful.
• Unforgiving : Unwilling to forgive others for mistakes or wrongdoings.
• Overly sensitive : Easily hurt or offended by others.
• Neurotic : Excessively anxious or obsessed with certain thoughts or behaviors.
• Boastful : Bragging about achievements or possessions.
• Self-righteous : Believing oneself to be morally superior to others.
• Clingy : Overly dependent on others for emotional support.
• Hypercritical : Excessively and unreasonably critical of oneself or others.
• Domineering : Asserting one’s will over others in an arrogant way.
• Pessimistic : Seeing the worst aspect of things or believing the worst will happen.
• Ungrateful : Lacking appreciation for others’ kindness or efforts.
• Scheming : Planning or plotting, often in a deceitful way.
• Indecisive : Unable to make decisions quickly or effectively.
• Impatient : Easily irritated by delays or the need to wait.
• Moody : Subject to unpredictable changes of mood.
• Self-pitying : Feeling sorry for oneself excessively.
• Harsh : Unpleasantly rough or severe in judgment or treatment of others.

What Causes Negative Personality Traits?

Negative personality traits can stem from a complex interplay of genetic, environmental, and psychological factors.

Some individuals may have a genetic predisposition to certain traits, such as impulsivity or aggression, due to inherited temperaments and brain chemistry.

Environment

Environmental influences, such as upbringing, life experiences, and social interactions, significantly shape these traits. For instance, growing up in a dysfunctional family or experiencing trauma can lead to the development of maladaptive behaviors as coping mechanisms.

Psychological Factors

Additionally, psychological factors, including unresolved emotional issues, low self-esteem, and cognitive biases, contribute to the manifestation of negative traits. A person’s belief system and thought patterns can reinforce negative behaviors, making them more pronounced over time.

Understanding the root causes of these traits is crucial for addressing them effectively. By gaining insight into their origins, individuals can work towards personal growth and the development of healthier, more adaptive behaviors.

The Effects of Negative Personality Traits

Negative personality traits can have far-reaching effects on various aspects of life, impacting personal relationships, professional success, and overall well-being. Here’s how:

Personal Relationships

• Conflict and mistrust : Traits like jealousy, dishonesty, and manipulativeness can lead to frequent conflicts and a breakdown of trust.
• Emotional distance : These behaviors can create emotional distance, eroding the foundation of intimacy and connection.
• Strained bonds: Over time, the accumulation of negative interactions can strain or even irreparably damage relationships.

Professional Success

• Teamwork and collaboration : Arrogance, stubbornness, and aggressiveness can hinder teamwork and create a toxic work environment.
• Career advancement : Consistently displaying negative traits can make working with colleagues and supervisors challenging, impeding career growth.
• Productivity and motivation : Chronic negativity and pessimism can drain motivation, reduce productivity, and prevent one from reaching their full potential.

Personal Well-Being

• Mental and emotional distress : Traits like cynicism, insecurity, and laziness can lead to feelings of isolation, low self-esteem, and a lack of fulfillment.
• Vicious cycle : Negative outcomes reinforced by negative traits can create a hard-to-break cycle, further entrenching these behaviors.

Recognizing and addressing negative personality traits is essential for fostering healthier relationships, enhancing professional success, and improving overall quality of life. By working towards self-awareness and personal growth, you can mitigate the adverse effects of these traits and cultivate a more positive, fulfilling existence.

The Positive Side of Negative Personality Traits

Interestingly, negative personality traits can have potential positive aspects when viewed through a different lens or harnessed constructively. For instance, a naturally skeptical person can excel in fields requiring critical thinking and problem-solving, where questioning assumptions is key. Stubbornness, often seen as a flaw, can translate into perseverance and determination, driving individuals to achieve their goals despite obstacles. 

Even traits like narcissism, when kept in check, can foster a healthy sense of self-confidence and ambition. By recognizing and channeling these traits positively, individuals can leverage their natural tendencies to enhance personal and professional success, turning perceived weaknesses into strengths.

How to Cope With Negative Personality Traits

Dealing with negative personality traits requires a blend of self-awareness, practical strategies, and a dash of resilience. Here’s how you can turn the tide on those pesky traits:

Embrace Self-Discovery

Start by shining a light on your inner workings. Dive into journaling or try mindfulness meditation to get a clear picture of your behaviors. Honest feedback from trusted friends or family can also be an eye-opener, revealing patterns you might not notice yourself.

Harness Mindfulness

Mindfulness can be a powerful self-help tool when utilized effectively. Techniques like deep breathing, meditation, and progressive muscle relaxation can help you catch negative impulses before they spiral out of control. Think of it as hitting the pause button on your reactions.

Seek Professional Guidance

Don’t shy away from getting help. Therapists or counselors can offer personalized strategies to tackle deep-seated issues, giving you the tools to develop healthier habits. Consider it an investment in your mental and emotional toolkit.

Flip the Script

Transform your focus by nurturing positive traits . Struggling with pessimism? Start a gratitude journal, jotting down things you’re thankful for each day. This simple shift can work wonders in changing your outlook.

Set Small, Achievable Goals

Pinpoint specific behaviors to change and set realistic goals. If criticism is your Achilles’ heel, aim to give three genuine compliments each day. Small steps lead to big changes over time.

Cultivate Resilience

Build your emotional armor through regular exercise, a balanced diet, and good sleep hygiene. These habits not only boost your well-being but also fortify your ability to handle stress and negativity.

Lean on Your Social Network

Surround yourself with positive influences. Share your goals with a trusted friend or join a support group. Having cheerleaders in your corner can provide the accountability and encouragement you need to stay on track.

Commit to Lifelong Learning

Stay on the path of personal growth by reading self-help books, attending workshops, or learning from others’ experiences. Each new insight can help you reshape negative traits into strengths, proving that change is always possible.

By embracing these strategies, you can turn negative personality traits into opportunities for growth, leading to richer relationships, greater personal satisfaction, and a more harmonious life.

Related reading:

• What Are Guilty Pleasures?
• List of Neutral Personality Traits
• List of Unique Talents and Skills

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Bad College Essays: 10 Mistakes You Must Avoid

College Essays

Just as there are noteworthy examples of excellent college essays that admissions offices like to publish, so are there cringe-worthy examples of terrible college essays that end up being described by anonymous admissions officers on Reddit discussion boards.

While I won't guarantee that your essay will end up in the first category, I will say that you follow my advice in this article, your essay most assuredly won't end up in the second. How do you avoid writing a bad admissions essay? Read on to find out what makes an essay bad and to learn which college essay topics to avoid. I'll also explain how to recognize bad college essays—and what to do to if you end up creating one by accident.

What Makes Bad College Essays Bad

What exactly happens to turn a college essay terrible? Just as great personal statements combine an unexpected topic with superb execution, flawed personal statements compound problematic subject matter with poor execution.

Problems With the Topic

The primary way to screw up a college essay is to flub what the essay is about or how you've decided to discuss a particular experience. Badly chosen essay content can easily create an essay that is off-putting in one of a number of ways I'll discuss in the next section.

The essay is the place to let the admissions office of your target college get to know your personality, character, and the talents and skills that aren't on your transcript. So if you start with a terrible topic, not only will you end up with a bad essay, but you risk ruining the good impression that the rest of your application makes.

Some bad topics show admissions officers that you don't have a good sense of judgment or maturity , which is a problem since they are building a class of college students who have to be able to handle independent life on campus.

Other bad topics suggest that you are a boring person , or someone who doesn't process your experience in a colorful or lively way, which is a problem since colleges want to create a dynamic and engaged cohort of students.

Still other bad topics indicate that you're unaware of or disconnected from the outside world and focused only on yourself , which is a problem since part of the point of college is to engage with new people and new ideas, and admissions officers are looking for people who can do that.

Problems With the Execution

Sometimes, even if the experiences you discuss could be the foundation of a great personal statement, the way you've structured and put together your essay sends up warning flags. This is because the admissions essay is also a place to show the admissions team the maturity and clarity of your writing style.

One way to get this part wrong is to exhibit very faulty writing mechanics , like unclear syntax or incorrectly used punctuation. This is a problem since college-ready writing is one of the things that's expected from a high school graduate.

Another way to mess this up is to ignore prompt instructions either for creative or careless reasons. This can show admissions officers that you're either someone who simply blows off directions and instructions or someone who can't understand how to follow them . Neither is a good thing, since they are looking for people who are open to receiving new information from professors and not just deciding they know everything already.

College Essay Topics To Avoid

Want to know why you're often advised to write about something mundane and everyday for your college essay? That's because the more out-there your topic, the more likely it is to stumble into one of these trouble categories.

Too Personal

The problem with the overly personal essay topic is that revealing something very private can show that you don't really understand boundaries . And knowing where appropriate boundaries are will be key for living on your own with a bunch of people not related to you.

Unfortunately, stumbling into the TMI zone of essay topics is more common than you think. One quick test for checking your privacy-breaking level: if it's not something you'd tell a friendly stranger sitting next to you on the plane, maybe don't tell it to the admissions office.

• Describing losing your virginity, or anything about your sex life really. This doesn't mean you can't write about your sexual orientation—just leave out the actual physical act.
• Writing in too much detail about your illness, disability, any other bodily functions. Detailed meaningful discussion of what this physical condition has meant to you and your life is a great thing to write about. But stay away from body horror and graphic descriptions that are simply there for gratuitous shock value.
• Waxing poetic about your love for your significant other. Your relationship is adorable to the people currently involved in it, but those who don't know you aren't invested in this aspect of your life.
• Confessing to odd and unusual desires of the sexual or illegal variety. Your obsession with cultivating cacti is wonderful topic, while your obsession with researching explosives is a terrible one.

Too Revealing of Bad Judgment

Generally speaking, leave past illegal or immoral actions out of your essay . It's simply a bad idea to give admissions officers ammunition to dislike you.

Some exceptions might be if you did something in a very, very different mindset from the one you're in now (in the midst of escaping from danger, under severe coercion, or when you were very young, for example). Or if your essay is about explaining how you've turned over a new leaf and you have the transcript to back you up.

• Writing about committing crime as something fun or exciting. Unless it's on your permanent record, and you'd like a chance to explain how you've learned your lesson and changed, don't put this in your essay.
• Describing drug use or the experience of being drunk or high. Even if you're in a state where some recreational drugs are legal, you're a high school student. Your only exposure to mind-altering substances should be caffeine.
• Making up fictional stories about yourself as though they are true. You're unlikely to be a good enough fantasist to pull this off, and there's no reason to roll the dice on being discovered to be a liar.
• Detailing your personality flaws. Unless you have a great story of coping with one of these, leave deal-breakers like pathological narcissism out of your personal statement.

Too Overconfident

While it's great to have faith in your abilities, no one likes a relentless show-off. No matter how magnificent your accomplishments, if you decide to focus your essay on them, it's better to describe a setback or a moment of doubt rather that simply praising yourself to the skies.

• Bragging and making yourself the flawless hero of your essay. This goes double if you're writing about not particularly exciting achievements like scoring the winning goal or getting the lead in the play.
• Having no awareness of the actual scope of your accomplishments. It's lovely that you take time to help others, but volunteer-tutoring a couple of hours a week doesn't make you a saintly figure.

Too Clichéd or Boring

Remember your reader. In this case, you're trying to make yourself memorable to an admissions officer who has been reading thousands of other essays . If your essay makes the mistake of being boring or trite, it just won't register in that person's mind as anything worth paying attention to.

• Transcribing your resume into sentence form or writing about the main activity on your transcript. The application already includes your resume, or a detailed list of your various activities. Unless the prompt specifically asks you to write about your main activity, the essay needs to be about a facet of your interests and personality that doesn't come through the other parts of the application.
• Writing about sports. Every athlete tries to write this essay. Unless you have a completely off-the-wall story or unusual achievement, leave this overdone topic be.
• Being moved by your community service trip to a third-world country. Were you were impressed at how happy the people seemed despite being poor? Did you learn a valuable lesson about how privileged you are? Unfortunately, so has every other teenager who traveled on one of these trips. Writing about this tends to simultaneously make you sound unempathetic, clueless about the world, way over-privileged, and condescending. Unless you have a highly specific, totally unusual story to tell, don't do it.
• Reacting with sadness to a sad, but very common experience. Unfortunately, many of the hard, formative events in your life are fairly universal. So, if you're going to write about death or divorce, make sure to focus on how you dealt with this event, so the essay is something only you could possibly have written. Only detailed, idiosyncratic description can save this topic.
• Going meta. Don't write about the fact that you're writing the essay as we speak, and now the reader is reading it, and look, the essay is right here in the reader's hand. It's a technique that seems clever, but has already been done many times in many different ways.
• Offering your ideas on how to fix the world. This is especially true if your solution is an easy fix, if only everyone would just listen to you. Trust me, there's just no way you are being realistically appreciative of the level of complexity inherent in the problem you're describing.
• Starting with a famous quotation. There usually is no need to shore up your own words by bringing in someone else's. Of course, if you are writing about a particular phrase that you've adopted as a life motto, feel free to include it. But even then, having it be the first line in your essay feels like you're handing the keys over to that author and asking them to drive.
• Using an everyday object as a metaphor for your life/personality. "Shoes. They are like this, and like that, and people love them for all of these reasons. And guess what? They are just like me."

Too Off-Topic

Unlike the essays you've been writing in school where the idea is to analyze something outside of yourself, the main subject of your college essay should be you, your background, your makeup, and your future . Writing about someone or something else might well make a great essay, but not for this context.

• Paying tribute to someone very important to you. Everyone would love to meet your grandma, but this isn't the time to focus on her amazing coming of age story. If you do want to talk about a person who is important to your life, dwell on the ways you've been impacted by them, and how you will incorporate this impact into your future.
• Documenting how well other people do things, say things, are active, while you remain passive and inactive in the essay. Being in the orbit of someone else's important lab work, or complex stage production, or meaningful political activism is a fantastic learning moment. But if you decide to write about, your essay should be about your learning and how you've been influenced, not about the other person's achievements.
• Concentrating on a work of art that deeply moved you. Watch out for the pitfall of writing an analytical essay about that work, and not at all about your reaction to it or how you've been affected since. Check out our explanation of how to answer Topic D of the ApplyTexas application to get some advice on writing about someone else's work while making sure your essay still points back at you.

(Image: Pieter Christoffel Wonder [Public domain] , via Wikimedia Commons)

Too Offensive

With this potential mistake, you run the risk of showing a lack of self-awareness or the ability to be open to new ideas . Remember, no reader wants to be lectured at. If that's what your essay does, you are demonstrating an inability to communicate successfully with others.

Also, remember that no college is eager to admit someone who is too close-minded to benefit from being taught by others. A long, one-sided essay about a hot-button issue will suggest that you are exactly that.

• Ranting at length about political, religious, or other contentious topics. You simply don't know where the admissions officer who reads your essay stands on any of these issues. It's better to avoid upsetting or angering that person.
• Writing a one-sided diatribe about guns, abortion, the death penalty, immigration, or anything else in the news. Even if you can marshal facts in your argument, this essay is simply the wrong place to take a narrow, unempathetic side in an ongoing debate.
• Mentioning anything negative about the school you're applying to. Again, your reader is someone who works there and presumably is proud of the place. This is not the time to question the admissions officer's opinions or life choices.

College Essay Execution Problems To Avoid

Bad college essays aren't only caused by bad topics. Sometimes, even if you're writing about an interesting, relevant topic, you can still seem immature or unready for college life because of the way you present that topic—the way you actually write your personal statement. Check to make sure you haven't made any of the common mistakes on this list.

Tone-Deafness

Admissions officers are looking for resourcefulness, the ability to be resilient, and an active and optimistic approach to life —these are all qualities that create a thriving college student. Essays that don't show these qualities are usually suffering from tone-deafness.

• Being whiny or complaining about problems in your life. Is the essay about everyone doing things to/against you? About things happening to you, rather than you doing anything about them? That perspective is a definite turn-off.
• Trying and failing to use humor. You may be very funny in real life, but it's hard to be successfully funny in this context, especially when writing for a reader who doesn't know you. If you do want to use humor, I'd recommend the simplest and most straightforward version: being self-deprecating and low-key.
• Talking down to the reader, or alternately being self-aggrandizing. No one enjoys being condescended to. In this case, much of the function of your essay is to charm and make yourself likable, which is unlikely to happen if you adopt this tone.
• Being pessimistic, cynical, and generally depressive. You are applying to college because you are looking forward to a future of learning, achievement, and self-actualization. This is not the time to bust out your existential ennui and your jaded, been-there-done-that attitude toward life.

(Image: Eduard Munch [Public Domain] , via Wikimedia Commons)

Lack of Personality

One good question to ask yourself is: could anyone else have written this essay ? If the answer is yes, then you aren't doing a good job of representing your unique perspective on the world. It's very important to demonstrate your ability to be a detailed observer of the world, since that will be one of your main jobs as a college student.

• Avoiding any emotions, and appearing robot-like and cold in the essay. Unlike essays that you've been writing for class, this essay is meant to be a showcase of your authorial voice and personality. It may seem strange to shift gears after learning how to take yourself out of your writing, but this is the place where you have to put as much as yourself in as possible.
• Skipping over description and specific details in favor of writing only in vague generalities. Does your narrative feel like a newspaper horoscope, which could apply to every other person who was there that day? Then you're doing it wrong and need to refocus on your reaction, feelings, understanding, and transformation.

Off-Kilter Style

There's some room for creativity here, yes, but a college essay isn't a free-for-all postmodern art class . True, there are prompts that specifically call for your most out-of-left-field submission, or allow you to submit a portfolio or some other work sample instead of a traditional essay. But on a standard application, it's better to stick to traditional prose, split into paragraphs, further split into sentences.

• Submitting anything other than just the materials asked for on your application. Don't send food to the admissions office, don't write your essay on clothing or shoes, don't create a YouTube channel about your undying commitment to the school. I know there are a lot of urban legends about "that one time this crazy thing worked," but they are either not true or about something that will not work a second time.
• Writing your essay in verse, in the form of a play, in bullet points, as an acrostic, or any other non-prose form. Unless you really have a way with poetry or playwriting, and you are very confident that you can meet the demands of the prompt and explain yourself well in this form, don't discard prose simply for the sake of being different.
• Using as many "fancy" words as possible and getting very far away from sounding like yourself. Admissions officers are unanimous in wanting to hear your not fully formed teenage voice in your essay. This means that you should write at the top of your vocabulary range and syntax complexity, but don't trade every word up for a thesaurus synonym. Your essay will suffer for it.

Failure to Proofread

Most people have a hard time checking over their own work. This is why you have to make sure that someone else proofreads your writing . This is the one place where you can, should—and really must—get someone who knows all about grammar, punctuation and has a good eye for detail to take a red pencil to your final draft.

Otherwise, you look like you either don't know the basic rules or writing (in which case, are you really ready for college work?) or don't care enough to present yourself well (in which case, why would the admissions people care about admitting you?).

• Typos, grammatical mistakes, punctuation flubs, weird font/paragraph spacing issues. It's true that these are often unintentional mistakes. But caring about getting it right is a way to demonstrate your work ethic and dedication to the task at hand.
• Going over the word limit. Part of showing your brilliance is being able to work within arbitrary rules and limitations. Going over the word count points to a lack of self-control, which is not a very attractive feature in a college applicant.
• Repeating the same word(s) or sentence structure over and over again. This makes your prose monotonous and hard to read.

Bad College Essay Examples—And How to Fix Them

The beauty of writing is that you get to rewrite. So if you think of your essay as a draft waiting to be revised into a better version rather than as a precious jewel that can't bear being touched, you'll be in far better shape to correct the issues that always crop up!

Now let's take a look at some actual college essay drafts to see where the writer is going wrong and how the issue could be fixed.

Essay #1: The "I Am Writing This Essay as We Speak" Meta-Narrative

Was your childhood home destroyed by a landspout tornado? Yeah, neither was mine. I know that intro might have given the impression that this college essay will be about withstanding disasters, but the truth is that it isn't about that at all.

In my junior year, I always had in mind an image of myself finishing the college essay months before the deadline. But as the weeks dragged on and the deadline drew near, it soon became clear that at the rate things are going I would probably have to make new plans for my October, November and December.

Falling into my personal wormhole, I sat down with my mom to talk about colleges. "Maybe you should write about Star Trek ," she suggested, "you know how you've always been obsessed with Captain Picard, calling him your dream mentor. Unique hobbies make good topics, right? You'll sound creative!" I played with the thought in my mind, tapping my imaginary communicator pin and whispering "Computer. Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. And then an Essay." Nothing happened. Instead, I sat quietly in my room wrote the old-fashioned way. Days later I emerged from my room disheveled, but to my dismay, this college essay made me sound like just a guy who can't get over the fact that he'll never take the Starfleet Academy entrance exam. So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

I fell into a state of panic. My college essay. My image of myself in senior year. Almost out of nowhere, Robert Jameson Smith offered his words of advice. Perfect! He suggested students begin their college essay by listing their achievements and letting their essay materialize from there. My heart lifted, I took his advice and listed three of my greatest achievements - mastering my backgammon strategy, being a part of TREE in my sophomore year, and performing "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General" from The Pirates of Penzance in public. And sure enough, I felt inspiration hit me and began to type away furiously into the keyboard about my experience in TREE, or Trees Require Engaged Environmentalists. I reflected on the current state of deforestation, and described the dichotomy of it being both understandable why farmers cut down forests for farmland, and how dangerous this is to our planet. Finally, I added my personal epiphany to the end of my college essay as the cherry on the vanilla sundae, as the overused saying goes.

After 3 weeks of figuring myself out, I have converted myself into a piece of writing. As far as achievements go, this was definitely an amazing one. The ability to transform a human being into 603 words surely deserves a gold medal. Yet in this essay, I was still being nagged by a voice that couldn't be ignored. Eventually, I submitted to that yelling inner voice and decided that this was not the right essay either.

In the middle of a hike through Philadelphia's Fairmount Park, I realized that the college essay was nothing more than an embodiment of my character. The two essays I have written were not right because they have failed to become more than just words on recycled paper. The subject failed to come alive. Certainly my keen interest in Star Trek and my enthusiasm for TREE are a great part of who I am, but there were other qualities essential in my character that did not come across in the essays.

With this realization, I turned around as quickly as I could without crashing into a tree.

What Essay #1 Does Well

Here are all things that are working on all cylinders for this personal statement as is.

Killer First Sentence

Was your childhood home destroyed by a landspout tornado? Yeah, neither was mine.

• A strange fact. There are different kinds of tornadoes? What is a "landspout tornado" anyway?
• A late-night-deep-thoughts hypothetical. What would it be like to be a kid whose house was destroyed in this unusual way?
• Direct engagement with the reader. Instead of asking "what would it be like to have a tornado destroy a house" it asks "was your house ever destroyed."

Gentle, Self-Deprecating Humor That Lands Well

I played with the thought in my mind, tapping my imaginary communicator pin and whispering "Computer. Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. And then an Essay." Nothing happened. Instead, I sat quietly in my room wrote the old-fashioned way. Days later I emerged from my room disheveled, but to my dismay, this college essay made me sound like just a guy who can't get over the fact that he'll never take the Starfleet Academy entrance exam. So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

The author has his cake and eats it too here: both making fun of himself for being super into the Star Trek mythos, but also showing himself being committed enough to try whispering a command to the Enterprise computer alone in his room. You know, just in case.

A Solid Point That Is Made Paragraph by Paragraph

The meat of the essay is that the two versions of himself that the author thought about portraying each fails in some way to describe the real him. Neither an essay focusing on his off-beat interests, nor an essay devoted to his serious activism could capture everything about a well-rounded person in 600 words.

(Image: fir0002 via Wikimedia Commons .)

Where Essay #1 Needs Revision

Rewriting these flawed parts will make the essay shine.

Spending Way Too Long on the Metanarrative

I know that intro might have given the impression that this college essay will be about withstanding disasters, but the truth is that it isn't about that at all.

After 3 weeks of figuring myself out, I have converted myself into a piece of writing. As far as achievements go, this was definitely an amazing one. The ability to transform a human being into 603 words surely deserves a gold medal.

Look at how long and draggy these paragraphs are, especially after that zippy opening. Is it at all interesting to read about how someone else found the process of writing hard? Not really, because this is a very common experience.

In the rewrite, I'd advise condensing all of this to maybe a sentence to get to the meat of the actual essay .

Letting Other People Do All the Doing

I sat down with my mom to talk about colleges. "Maybe you should write about Star Trek ," she suggested, "you know how you've always been obsessed with Captain Picard, calling him your dream mentor. Unique hobbies make good topics, right? You'll sound creative!"

Almost out of nowhere, Robert Jameson Smith offered his words of advice. Perfect! He suggested students begin their college essay by listing their achievements and letting their essay materialize from there.

Twice in the essay, the author lets someone else tell him what to do. Not only that, but it sounds like both of the "incomplete" essays were dictated by the thoughts of other people and had little to do with his own ideas, experiences, or initiative.

In the rewrite, it would be better to recast both the Star Trek and the TREE versions of the essay as the author's own thoughts rather than someone else's suggestions . This way, the point of the essay—taking apart the idea that a college essay could summarize life experience—is earned by the author's two failed attempts to write that other kind of essay.

Leaving the Insight and Meaning Out of His Experiences

Both the Star Trek fandom and the TREE activism were obviously important life experiences for this author—important enough to be potential college essay topic candidates. But there is no description of what the author did with either one, nor any explanation of why these were so meaningful to his life.

It's fine to say that none of your achievements individually define you, but in order for that to work, you have to really sell the achievements themselves.

In the rewrite, it would be good to explore what he learned about himself and the world by pursuing these interests . How did they change him or seen him into the person he is today?

Not Adding New Shades and Facets of Himself Into the Mix

So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

Yet in this essay, I was still being nagged by a voice that couldn't be ignored. Eventually, I submitted to that yelling inner voice and decided that this was not the right essay either.

In both of these passages, there is the perfect opportunity to point out what exactly these failed versions of the essay didn't capture about the author . In the next essay draft, I would suggest subtly making a point about his other qualities.

For example, after the Star Trek paragraph, he could talk about other culture he likes to consume, especially if he can discuss art forms he is interested in that would not be expected from someone who loves Star Trek .

Or, after the TREE paragraph, the author could explain why this second essay was no better at capturing him than the first. What was missing? Why is the self in the essay shouting—is it because this version paints him as an overly aggressive activist?

Essay #2: The "I Once Saw Poor People" Service Trip Essay

Unlike other teenagers, I'm not concerned about money, or partying, or what others think of me. Unlike other eighteen year-olds, I think about my future, and haven't become totally materialistic and acquisitive. My whole outlook on life changed after I realized that my life was just being handed to me on a silver spoon, and yet there were those in the world who didn't have enough food to eat or place to live. I realized that the one thing that this world needed more than anything was compassion; compassion for those less fortunate than us.

During the summer of 2006, I went on a community service trip to rural Peru to help build an elementary school for kids there. I expected harsh conditions, but what I encountered was far worse. It was one thing to watch commercials asking for donations to help the unfortunate people in less developed countries, yet it was a whole different story to actually live it. Even after all this time, I can still hear babies crying from hunger; I can still see the filthy rags that they wore; I can still smell the stench of misery and hopelessness. But my most vivid memory was the moment I first got to the farming town. The conditions of it hit me by surprise; it looked much worse in real life than compared to the what our group leader had told us. Poverty to me and everyone else I knew was a foreign concept that people hear about on the news or see in documentaries. But this abject poverty was their life, their reality. And for the brief ten days I was there, it would be mine too. As all of this realization came at once, I felt overwhelmed by the weight of what was to come. Would I be able to live in the same conditions as these people? Would I catch a disease that no longer existed in the first world, or maybe die from drinking contaminated water? As these questions rolled around my already dazed mind, I heard a soft voice asking me in Spanish, "Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" I looked down to see a small boy, around nine years of age, who looked starved, and cold, wearing tattered clothing, comforting me. These people who have so little were able to forget their own needs, and put those much more fortunate ahead of themselves. It was at that moment that I saw how selfish I had been. How many people suffered like this in the world, while I went about life concerned about nothing at all?

Thinking back on the trip, maybe I made a difference, maybe not. But I gained something much more important. I gained the desire to make the world a better place for others. It was in a small, poverty-stricken village in Peru that I finally realized that there was more to life than just being alive.

What Essay #2 Does Well

Let's first point out what this draft has going for it.

Clear Chronology

This is an essay that tries to explain a shift in perspective. There are different ways to structure this overarching idea, but a chronological approach that starts with an earlier opinion, describes a mind changing event, and ends with the transformed point of view is an easy and clear way to lay this potentially complex subject out.

(Image: User:Lite via Wikimedia Commons)

Where Essay #2 Needs Revision

Now let's see what needs to be changed in order for this essay to pass muster.

Condescending, Obnoxious Tone

Unlike other teenagers, I'm not concerned about money, or partying, or what others think of me. Unlike other eighteen year-olds, I think about my future, and haven't become totally materialistic and acquisitive.

This is a very broad generalization, which doesn't tend to be the best way to formulate an argument—or to start an essay. It just makes this author sound dismissive of a huge swath of the population.

In the rewrite, this author would be way better off just concentrate on what she want to say about herself, not pass judgment on "other teenagers," most of whom she doesn't know and will never meet.

I realized that the one thing that this world needed more than anything was compassion; compassion for those less fortunate than us.

Coming from someone who hasn't earned her place in the world through anything but the luck of being born, the word "compassion" sounds really condescending. Calling others "less fortunate" when you're a senior in high school has a dehumanizing quality to it.

These people who have so little were able to forget their own needs, and put those much more fortunate in front of themselves.

Again, this comes across as very patronizing. Not only that, but to this little boy the author was clearly not looking all that "fortunate"—instead, she looked pathetic enough to need comforting.

In the next draft, a better hook could be making the essay about the many different kinds of shifting perspectives the author encountered on that trip . A more meaningful essay would compare and contrast the points of view of the TV commercials, to what the group leader said, to the author's own expectations, and finally to this child's point of view.

Vague, Unobservant Description

During the summer of 2006, I went on a community service trip to rural Peru to help build an elementary school for kids there. I expected harsh conditions, but what I encountered was far worse. It was one thing to watch commercials asking for donations to help the unfortunate people in less developed countries, yet it was a whole different story to actually live it. Even after all this time, I can still hear babies crying from hunger; I can still see the filthy rags that they wore; I can still smell the stench of misery and hopelessness.

Phrases like "cries of the small children from not having enough to eat" and "dirt stained rags" seem like descriptions, but they're really closer to incurious and completely hackneyed generalizations. Why were the kids were crying? How many kids? All the kids? One specific really loud kid?

The same goes for "filthy rags," which is both an incredibly insensitive way to talk about the clothing of these villagers, and again shows a total lack of interest in their life. Why were their clothes dirty? Were they workers or farmers so their clothes showing marks of labor? Did they have Sunday clothes? Traditional clothes they would put on for special occasions? Did they make their own clothes? That would be a good reason to keep wearing clothing even if it had "stains" on it.

The rewrite should either make this section more specific and less reliant on cliches, or should discard it altogether .

The conditions of it hit me by surprise; it looked much worse in real life than compared to the what our group leader had told us. Poverty to me and everyone else I knew was a foreign concept that people hear about on the news or see in documentaries. But this abject poverty was their life, their reality.

If this is the "most vivid memory," then I would expect to read all the details that have been seared into the author's brain. What did their leader tell them? What was different in real life? What was the light like? What did the houses/roads/grass/fields/trees/animals/cars look like? What time of day was it? Did they get there by bus, train, or plane? Was there an airport/train station/bus terminal? A city center? Shops? A marketplace?

There are any number of details to include here when doing another drafting pass.

Lack of Insight or Maturity

But this abject poverty was their life, their reality. And for the brief ten days I was there, it would be mine too. As all of this realization came at once, I felt overwhelmed by the weight of what was to come. Would I be able to live in the same conditions as these people? Would I catch a disease that no longer existed in the first world, or maybe die from drinking contaminated water?

Without a framing device explaining that this initial panic was an overreaction, this section just makes the author sound whiny, entitled, melodramatic, and immature . After all, this isn't a a solo wilderness trek—the author is there with a paid guided program. Just how much mortality is typically associated with these very standard college-application-boosting service trips?

In a rewrite, I would suggest including more perspective on the author's outsized and overprivileged response here. This would fit well with a new focus on the different points of view on this village the author encountered.

Unearned, Clichéd "Deep Thoughts"

But I gained something much more important. I gained the desire to make the world a better place for others. It was in a small, poverty-stricken village in Peru that I finally realized that there was more to life than just being alive.

Is it really believable that this is what the author learned? There is maybe some evidence to suggest that the author was shaken somewhat out of a comfortable, materialistic existence. But what does "there is more to life than just being alive" even really mean? This conclusion is rather vague, and seems mostly a non sequitur.

In a rewrite, the essay should be completely reoriented to discuss how differently others see us than we see ourselves, pivoting on the experience of being pitied by someone who you thought was pitiable. Then, the new version can end by on a note of being better able to understand different points of view and other people's perspectives .

The Bottom Line

• Bad college essays have problems either with their topics or their execution.
• The essay is how admissions officers learn about your personality, point of view, and maturity level, so getting the topic right is a key factor in letting them see you as an aware, self-directed, open-minded applicant who is going to thrive in an environment of independence.
• The essay is also how admissions officers learn that you are writing at a ready-for-college level, so screwing up the execution shows that you either don't know how to write, or don't care enough to do it well.
• The main ways college essay topics go wrong is bad taste, bad judgment, and lack of self-awareness.
• The main ways college essays fail in their execution have to do with ignoring format, syntax, and genre expectations.

What's Next?

Want to read some excellent college essays now that you've seen some examples of flawed one? Take a look through our roundup of college essay examples published by colleges and then get help with brainstorming your perfect college essay topic .

Need some guidance on other parts of the application process? Check out our detailed, step-by-step guide to college applications for advice.

Are you considering taking the SAT or ACT again before you submit your application? Read about our famous test prep guides for hints and strategies for a better score.

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Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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Personal Characteristics Essay: Top Examples and Tips for Successful Writing

Looking to write a compelling personal characteristics essay? Our article offers top examples and tips for successful writing.

Posted August 18, 2023

Featuring Ty C.

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Starting tuesday, august 6.

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Table of Contents

When it comes to writing a personal characteristics essay, there are several important factors to consider to ensure that your essay stands out from the rest. This type of essay requires you to talk about your personal traits and characteristics and how they have shaped your life experiences and decisions. Writing a personal characteristics essay can be daunting, but with the right strategies and techniques, you can craft an impressive essay that leaves a lasting impression.

Understanding the Purpose of a Personal Characteristics Essay

Before diving into the writing process, it's essential to understand the purpose of a personal characteristics essay. The purpose of this type of essay is to showcase your unique qualities and characteristics, which makes you stand out from the rest. It's an opportunity for the reader to gain insight into your personality and the way you think. Your essay should not only provide a description of your traits but also demonstrate how they influence your actions and decisions.

Additionally, a personal characteristics essay can also serve as a tool for self-reflection and personal growth. Through the process of writing about your traits and how they have impacted your life, you may gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your values. This type of essay can also help you identify areas for improvement and set goals for personal development.

How to Choose a Topic for Your Personal Characteristics Essay

Choosing the right topic for your personal characteristics essay is crucial. You want to select a topic that not only reflects your personality but also allows you to showcase your writing skills. Start by brainstorming a list of traits and characteristics that define you. From there, select a topic that highlights one or two of these traits. Think about a situation that showcases these traits and how you overcame a challenge or learned a valuable lesson.

Another important factor to consider when choosing a topic for your personal characteristics essay is your audience. Think about who will be reading your essay and what they might be interested in learning about you. Consider selecting a topic that is relatable and relevant to your audience, while still highlighting your unique qualities.

It's also important to remember that your personal characteristics essay should not just be a list of traits or accomplishments. Instead, focus on telling a story that illustrates your personality and how it has shaped your experiences and perspectives. Choose a topic that allows you to delve deeper into your personal journey and share insights that will resonate with your readers.

Brainstorming Techniques for Your Personal Characteristics Essay

Brainstorming is an essential step in the writing process. It allows you to generate ideas and make connections between them. Try using mind maps or free-writing to get your ideas down on paper. You might also consider asking friends or family members what they think your most prominent traits are to get an outside perspective.

Another effective technique for brainstorming your personal characteristics essay is to reflect on your past experiences and how they have shaped you. Think about challenges you have faced and how you overcame them, or moments of success and how they have contributed to your personal growth. These experiences can provide valuable insight into your character and help you identify key traits to highlight in your essay.

The Importance of Organizing Your Thoughts and Ideas

Once you've generated your ideas, it's time to organize them. Start by creating an outline that includes the main points you want to make in your essay. Your outline should also include the introduction, body, and conclusion sections of your essay. Organizing your thoughts and ideas will help you stay on track and ensure that you cover all the necessary points in your essay.

Moreover, organizing your thoughts and ideas can also help you identify any gaps in your argument or areas where you need to do more research. By creating an outline, you can see where you need to add more information or examples to support your points. This can help you create a more well-rounded and convincing essay.

Additionally, organizing your thoughts and ideas can also help you save time in the long run. When you have a clear outline to follow, you can write your essay more efficiently and effectively. You won't waste time trying to figure out what to write next or how to structure your essay. Instead, you can focus on writing high-quality content that supports your thesis statement and engages your readers.

Tips for Writing a Strong Introduction to Your Essay

The introduction to your essay is crucial as it sets the tone for the rest of your essay. Your introduction should grab the reader's attention and entice them to keep reading. Consider starting with a hook, such as a quote, an anecdote, or a question. Your introduction should also include your thesis statement, which outlines the main point of your essay.

In addition to a hook and thesis statement, your introduction should also provide some background information on the topic you are writing about. This can help to contextualize your essay and give the reader a better understanding of the subject matter. However, be careful not to include too much information in your introduction, as it can become overwhelming and detract from the main point of your essay.

The Art of Developing a Compelling Thesis Statement

Your thesis statement should be concise and clear. It should provide a roadmap for the rest of your essay. Think about the main point you want to make and how you plan on supporting it throughout your essay. Make sure your thesis statement is arguable and specific.

Supporting Your Claims with Relevant Examples and Evidence

To make your essay more compelling, you should back up your claims and arguments with relevant examples and evidence. This will help your reader understand the extent of your personal qualities and how they have impacted your life experiences. Make sure to include specific examples from your life that illustrate the qualities you're discussing in your essay.

One effective way to provide evidence for your claims is to use statistics or data that support your argument. For example, if you're writing an essay about the benefits of exercise, you could include statistics about the number of people who have improved their health through regular exercise. This will add credibility to your argument and make it more convincing.

Another way to support your claims is to use expert opinions or quotes from reputable sources. This can help to strengthen your argument and show that you have done your research on the topic. Be sure to properly cite any sources you use in your essay.

The Power of Descriptive Writing: Painting a Vivid Picture with Words

Descriptive writing is a powerful tool that can be used to paint a vivid picture of your experiences and personality in your essay. Use sensory details to help your reader visualize your experiences. Consider incorporating metaphors or similes to make your writing more interesting and engaging.

Adding Depth and Complexity to Your Essay through Analysis and Reflection

Analysis and reflection are essential elements of an outstanding personal characteristics essay. Once you have described your traits and experiences, you should analyze how they have contributed to your personal growth and development. Reflection is also important as it allows you to consider how you might apply your characteristics to future situations.

The Benefits of Peer Review and Collaboration in Essay Writing

Collaborating with others can be immensely helpful in refining your essay. You might consider having a friend or family member review your essay and provide feedback. Peer review can help you identify areas where your essay needs improvement and provide suggestions for how to improve it.

Strategies for Effective Editing and Proofreading

Editing and proofreading are crucial steps in the writing process. Once you have completed your essay, take a break and come back to it with fresh eyes. Look for errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Make sure to also check that your essay flows logically and that your arguments are well-supported.

Addressing Common Pitfalls in Personal Characteristics Essays

One common pitfall in personal characteristics essays is focusing too much on describing your traits instead of analyzing how they have impacted your life experiences. Another common pitfall is using cliches or generic language instead of making your essay unique and interesting. Be sure to avoid these pitfalls to ensure your essay stands out.

Using Keywords and Meta Tags to Optimize Your Essay for Search Engines

If you plan on publishing your essay online, you might consider optimizing it for search engines such as Google. This involves using keywords and meta tags in your essay that will help it appear higher in search results. Be sure to research the most popular keywords related to your topic and include them strategically in your essay.

Crafting an Impressive Conclusion that Leaves a Lasting Impression

Finally, your conclusion should leave a lasting impression on the reader. Summarize your main points and reiterate your thesis statement. Think about what you want your reader to take away from your essay. Consider ending with a call to action or a memorable quote.

Writing a personal characteristics essay can be a challenging task, but with the right strategies and techniques, you can craft an impressive essay that showcases your unique qualities and characteristics. By following the tips outlined above, you'll be well on your way to writing a successful personal characteristics essay that leaves a lasting impression.

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Personality & Character Traits: The Good, the Bad, the Ugly

The world we live in is different from what it was 10, five, or even one year ago. Thanks to social media, easy-to-use communication tools, and globalization, the pool of possibilities and available information are constantly expanding.

Without a clear idea of one’s own preferences, making the right choice can be extremely difficult and confusing. Everyone’s personality is unique, and knowing what makes us who we are, can lead to more life satisfaction, better life choices, and overall success in both personal and professional spheres.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Strengths Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will help you or your clients realize your unique potential and create a life that feels energized and authentic.

This Article Contains:

Character and personality traits defined, character trait theories.

• The Big Five or OCEAN Model

The PEN Model

Examples of positive and negative characteristics, character traits worksheets for kids and adults (pdfs), the character traits anchor chart and other graphic organizers, a take-home message.

While character and personality are both used to describe someone’s behaviors, the two examine different aspects of that individual. One’s personality is more visible, while one’s  character is revealed over time, through varying situations.

In more concrete terms:

“Personality is easy to read, and we’re all experts at it. We judge people [as] funny, extroverted, energetic, optimistic , confident—as well as overly serious, lazy, negative, and shy—if not upon first meeting them, then shortly thereafter. And though we may need more than one interaction to confirm the presence of these sorts of traits, by the time we decide they are, in fact, present, we’ve usually amassed enough data to justify our conclusions. “Character, on the other hand, takes far longer to puzzle out. It includes traits that reveal themselves only in specific—and often uncommon—circumstances, traits like honesty, virtue, and kindliness .” Lickerman, 2011

While personality is easier to spot, it’s largely static and slow to evolve. Character, on the other hand, takes longer to discern but is easier to change. That’s because character is shaped by beliefs, and with enough effort and motivation, changing one’s perspective and view of the world can lead to a shift in one’s character.

The malleability of character makes sense when you look at human evolution. In order for our ancestors to survive, they had to adapt to new environments and change with the times—and this remains true in the modern era.

If an individual deems a change in their surroundings to be significant, then their beliefs will transform to accommodate the change.

For instance, an individual who might have a shy personality can learn to switch their attitude toward public speaking when stepping into the role of a teacher. The new social and external demands lead to an internal shift that changes their demeanor.

In this way, even if an individual’s inborn preference is to shy away from the public, the beliefs and values that shape their behavior can evolve to reflect the values of their immediate groups and communities. Such awareness and adaptability help with survival (Kurtus, 2011).

The bottom line is, despite the significance of our inborn personality traits, we can overcome them as required by personal or cultural demands.

TED Talk: Who Are You, Really? The Puzzle of Personality by Brian Little

In this talk, personality expert Brian Little explains the phenomenon of overcoming one’s inborn traits and explores how our character is modified by the core projects we work on.

Tools for identifying personality traits have never been more plentiful. “ In the U.S. alone, there are about 2,500 personality tests ” to choose from (Ash, 2012). Yet, quantity does not imply quality.

Due to immense variations in personality, it is difficult to divide people neatly into different classifications. Instead, assessing individuals by the most common personality traits can empower us to deduce a person’s behavior by looking at the average of their choices (Pappas, 2017).

Below are two of the most widely used personality tools that can identify your personality traits. Some pros and cons of each are also highlighted.

A quick note is that we have reviewed only scale-based personality assessments, rather than profile-based assessments. The difference is that scale-based assessments treat personality traits as existing on a continuum, whereas profile-based assessments classify individuals according to binary categories (e.g., an introvert or an extrovert).

Common profile-based assessments that you may be familiar with include the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) and the Enneagram. While these tools can be a fun way to gain some self-insight, they are often critiqued by scientists (Grant, 2013).

A key criticism is that the results of profile-based assessments pigeonhole individuals into particular categories (e.g., labeling someone as an extrovert or introvert; a thinker or a feeler), but few things in life are so black and white. In reality, it is believed that our personality traits exist on scales with opposite poles, and all of us will fall somewhere between either end of that continuum (e.g., the introversion-extroversion scale).

Put differently, “ if the MBTI measured height, you would be classified as either tall or short, even though the majority of people are within a band of medium height ” (Krznaric, 2013). Hence, we’ve limited this review to only scale-based assessments, which are more scientifically backed.

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The Big Five, or OCEAN Model

Perhaps the most comprehensive and science-backed, personality test available is the Big Five .

Unlike the popular (but disputed) Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), this assessment does not divide people into personality profiles but rather analyzes an individual based on the most common traits found within the global community. The traits are easy to remember, as they spell out the acronym OCEAN.

OCEAN stands for:

• Openness : This describes an individual’s love for novelty experiences. Those with high scores tend to be more creative . Individuals with lower scores tend to be more conservative and prefer routines.
• Conscientiousness : This shows someone’s tendency for organization. Those with high scores are seen as motivated, disciplined, and trustworthy. Lower scores indicate someone less responsible and more likely to get distracted.
• Extroversion : This factor indicates how cheerful and communicative a person can be. If someone scores highly in extroversion, they tend to be social and likely to accomplish their goals . Low scores indicate someone who is introverted and more submissive to authority.
• Agreeableness : This trait describes how someone interacts with those around them. High scores indicate that someone is warm and friendly. Those who tend to be more egocentric and suspicious (or even shy) tend to score lower.
• Neuroticism : Emotional stability can reveal a lot about the likelihood of someone developing moodiness and anxiety. High scores on neuroticism indicate someone who is less-assured, and low scores describe a person who is calm and confident (Westerhoff, 2008).

These categories serve as an umbrella that influences other personality areas, such as:

• Openness: imagination, feelings, actions, ideas, values, adventurousness, artistic interests, etc.
• Conscientiousness: order, self-discipline, competence, achievement striving, etc.
• Extroversion: warmth, friendliness, assertiveness, activity level, positive emotions, etc.
• Agreeableness: trust, compliance, modesty, altruism, sympathy, cooperation, etc.
• Neuroticism : hostility, depression, impulsiveness, anger, vulnerability, self-consciousness, etc. (ETS, 2012)

Take the test

Those wishing to know their OCEAN results can take any of the following quizzes:

• The Big Five Personality Test
• (Another) Big Five Personality Test
• Personality Test at 123test.com
• Ten Item Personality Measure (available in different languages)

Again, we’ll explore the benefits and drawbacks of the OCEAN model.

Unlike the MBTI, which tries to categorize people into one of 16 personality profiles, the Big Five understands that individuals possess certain traits, which need to be measured on a continuum. It is rare to be only on one or the other side of the spectrum.

For instance, saying that extroverts absorb energy when interacting with others and that introverts expend energy when interacting with the outside world is false, as both get energy from their interpersonal relations (Grant, 2015).

“The Big Five structure captures, at a broad level of abstraction, the commonalities among most of the existing systems of personality description, and provides an integrative descriptive model for personality research” (John & Srivastava, 1999).

Thanks to its results that provide scales of different traits rather than profiling the individual, this personality assessment tool can provide a degree of flexibility and versatility, which has enabled researchers to use the assessment to examine the influence of these traits on different areas of life, like  mental health , finances, and relationships.

And for the most part, these traits have been shown to be relatively stable. Specifically, in a nine-year study, there was “moderate to high [stability], ranging from 0.73 to 0.97 in men and from 0.65 to 0.95 in women. The highest gender-equal stability was found for openness to experience and the lowest for conscientiousness” (Rantanen, Metsäpelto, Feldt, Pulkkinen, & Kokko, 2007).

More specifically, men showed more stability in traits like neuroticism and extroversion, while women showed more stability in traits like openness to experience, agreeableness, and conscientiousness.

Despite its stability and usefulness, the tool does have its flaws.

Here are a few:

1. Too big to fail

As mentioned earlier, the beauty of this tool is its big-picture view of personality traits, but it’s also a limitation. A good analogy to explain this is the categorization of living organisms into plants or animals. While it’s helpful for certain distinctions, it is not helpful for “value predicting specific behaviors of a particular individual” (John, Naumann, & Soto, 2008).

2. Not so universal

While there has been evidence-based research to support the validity of the tool in more than 50 countries, flaws in translation and applicability to non-English-speaking cultures can be found. This results in skewed scores, as was demonstrated by research conducted with a small South American tribe (Dingfelder, 2013).

Developed by Hans and Sybil Eysenck in 1975, this model looks at the biological factors that trigger or influence personality. The three focal traits examined by this model are psychoticism, extroversion, and neuroticism (Waude, 2017).

The origins of this model date back to the 1960s, but it didn’t originally measure psychoticism (which relates to measures of  compassion , morality, as well as creativity). The older model used the Eysenck Personality Inventory to gather and analyze results.

With the addition of psychoticism, the questions were updated and the tool for gathering these results was renamed the Eysenck Personality Questionnaire.

Each of the trait categories explores the following human behaviors:

• Psychoticism : People who score high in this measure often participate in hostile, reckless, inconsiderate, nonconforming, tough-minded, and impulsive behaviors. Higher levels of testosterone are associated with higher scores in this area.
• Extroversion : Individuals with a high level of extroversion are more outgoing and talkative, and they desire external stimuli. Higher stimulation usually occurs as a result of increased cortical arousal and can be measured through skin conductance, brain waves, or sweating.
• Neuroticism : Those with a high level of neuroticism are more prone to depression and anxiety. The trait is activated by the sympathetic nervous system, which is also responsible for the fight-or-flight response. This can be measured through heart rate, blood pressure, cold hands, sweating, and muscular tension.

Based on these measures, there are four possible quadrants that individuals can fall into:

• Stable extroverts: recognized by their talkative, easygoing, lively, and carefree natures and their  leadership qualities
• Unstable extroverts: seen as touchy, restless, impulsive, and irresponsible
• Stable introverts: recognized by their calm, reliable, peaceful, thoughtful, and passive traits
• Unstable introverts: seen as reserved, pessimistic, rigid, anxious, and moody

Those interested in taking the Eysenck Personality Questionnaire can do so here .

Once more, we’ll explore the pros and cons of this personality model.

The model looks at both descriptive and causal effects. It examines three specific dimensions, making it easy to understand. And it has demonstrated test–retest reliability.

In fact, when specifically examining the pattern of moods, this assessment is able to predict certain outcomes. For instance, the questionnaire can predict significant associations with anxiety, according to a 2012 study.

“Focusing on the item of ‘Does your mood often go up and down?’ showed a statistically significant association with melancholia and anxiety for patients with a positive score on this item.” Bech, Lunde, & Moller, 2012

Through twin studies, researchers have also found that some of the personality traits measured with the PEN model “exhibit significant genetic variance” (Heath, Jardine, Eaves & Martin, 1988). For traits related to extroversion, researchers “found both additive gene action and dominance,” while “neuroticism items appeared to show purely additive genetic inheritance” (Heath, Jardine, Eaves & Martin, 1988).

Some factors, though, were shown to be influenced by the subjects’ environments, including the psychoticism scale, though for psychoticism the “environmental effects appeared to be largely restricted to males” (Heath, Jardine, Eaves & Martin, 1988).

Like most personality trait assessments, the PEN model is unable to predict future behaviors of individuals, even using the model allows for a better understanding of individuals’ personalities.

And there are certain limits to the model. In a study of both imprisoned and non-imprisoned people, researchers found that the samples often studied in research using the PEN model could create misleading results.

While past studies had shown high rates of extroversion, neuroticism, and psychoticism in criminals, researchers Rebolla, Herrera, and Collom found that this correlation might be linked as much to a person’s environment as inherited traits. They argue that extroverts “are less prone to conditioning. And this tendency increases with high [neuroticism] scores” (Rebollo, Herrera, & Colom, 2002).

The researchers argue that in order to build a conscience, conditioning is required (something that neurotic and extroverted people resist), which may lead to greater degrees of antisocial personalities among people who are highly extroverted and neurotic but don’t have social support while growing up (Rebollo, Herrera, & Colom, 2002).

The findings demonstrate that since personality traits are influenced by heredity, it is mainly through character and conditioning that a change can be developed in an individual. For instance, those who are more prone to fear and shyness can be taught coping techniques that are more congruent with social norms, allowing for better communication and integration into society.

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Having explored the differences between personality and character, we can dive deeper and examine the broader characteristics associated with positive and negative traits.

The collective research on personality has helped clarify the behaviors that are more conducive to wellbeing , with a majority of those behaviors helping to cultivate resilience toward external stimuli.

Another way to interpret this is with the concept of mental strength. This ability is acquired by focusing on things under personal command, which reinforces the internal locus of control.

The behaviors that lead to mental strength are identified below (Morin, 2013):

• Mentally strong people don’t feel sorry for themselves; instead, they take responsibility for their own life.
• They don’t give away their power to others and thus maintain control over their emotions.
• Individuals with mental toughness embrace change and are open to being flexible.
• Control is placed on things under the person’s influence, such as their attitude.
• Pleasing everyone is not a priority. While being kind and fair is important, making everyone happy is not.
• There is a motivation for making calculated risks.
• Mentally strong people focus on the present and make plans for the future.
• Mentally strong people try to make better decisions in the future and try not to repeat previous missteps.
• They demonstrate an ability to appreciate and celebrate the success of other people.
• They don’t give up after a failure; instead, they keep trying until they get it right.
• Mentally strong people tolerate being alone and staying in silence.
• They don’t feel that the world owes them something; instead, they create opportunities for themselves by utilizing their own talents and merits.
• Real change takes time, and mentally strong individuals understand this, so they’re patient.

These behaviors are positively supported by characteristics such as:

• Tenacity: not giving up when things get tough or when problems arise
• Confidence : belief in personal ability to find solutions to challenges
• Optimism: the perception that the odds are in one’s favor
• Adaptability: openness to new inputs and ideas
• Self-Awareness : the ability to shift perspective
• Reliability: following through with promises and goals
• Responsibility: owning up to personal mistakes and errors
• Wellbeing: making personal mental and physical health a priority

These and other characteristics help contribute to strong mental health (Half, 2016).

This supports the idea that openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness provide the foundation on which changes and challenges are welcomed, not shunned. In turn, this helps open doors to new possibilities and opportunities.

Specifically,

“Those whose personality tendencies tend toward empathy, cooperation, trust, and modesty (Costa & Widiger, 2002) are found to be more intrinsically motivated and find enjoyment through efforts they exert in the completion of tasks or in problem-solving. Possessing a proclivity toward mastery-approach orientation, these individuals will not shy away from challenging situations, and their desire to tackle challenges is greater than their fear of appearing unknowledgeable in front of others. In other words, they approach challenges with the full intent of mastering them.” Watson, 2012

The opposite of open-minded, calm, conscientious, and agreeable characteristics are those defined by judgment, neuroticism, and an external locus of control. Some behaviors that fall into this category are:

• Inability to accept setbacks
• Lack of clarity and decision-making
• Low capacity for critical thinking
• Failing to build strong interpersonal relations
• Always staying in the comfort zone
• Helplessness and absence of persistence
• Tendency to lean toward pessimism
• Weak imagination and an inability to visualize desired outcomes (Cardone, 2011)

Individuals with high scores in neuroticism often display narcissism, have inflated egos, and are emotionally distant, angry, hostile, and inflexible. These people tend to display the behaviors above.

Yet one key preventer of such negative traits, according to some studies, is self-control. “The more conscientious or prudent people are–no matter their other characteristics–the less likely they’ll be drawn toward harmful or illegal activities” (Chamorro-Premuzic, 2016).

Therefore, by increasing one’s self-awareness, individuals can spot their shortcomings and adopt habits to help balance out their personality traits. In turn, this helps them thrive.

Cultivating positive character traits can lead to greater success.

This is explained well by this excerpt from an article differentiating between character and personality:

“There is a direct link between positive character traits and a happy and successful life. Negative character traits that have been ‘strongly and long’ ingrained usually do cause strife at some point. But a focus on positive change can and does work.” Bell, 2010

Understanding one’s character traits and cultivating a strong desire and motivation for change can lead to better outcomes.

Here are some worksheets that can help get you and the people in your life started on this process.

There are plenty of tools for explaining character traits to kids. Here are some options for students ranging from first-graders to eighth-graders.

Fill in the Blank Worksheet

Perfect for kids in grades two through five,  this worksheet can be utilized during lessons on English, vocabulary, and writing.

Character Trait Analysis and Development

Here are 12 different worksheets designed for students in first through eighth grade. The worksheets introduce the idea of character traits and help students analyze and develop their character traits.

Lesson Plan on Character Traits

Those who teach third grade can utilize this entire lesson plan (which includes worksheets) to introduce character traits to the young students.

For Adults:

While it’s especially helpful to learn about character traits at a young age, adults can benefit from becoming more familiar with their positive and negative character traits.

Positive Traits Worksheet

At times, adults may be unable to recognize good qualities in themselves, which can prevent them from developing self-compassion and self-esteem. This worksheet describes 58 positive traits. You can the positive traits that describe yourself, which strengthens your belief in yourself and can lead to transformative conversations.

Visual of Character Traits

Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words. Clients who are unable to verbalize their feelings or thoughts can use these handy infographics that display the opposite pairs of various character traits.

Positive and Negative Traits Quiz

Taking a test can sometimes be very enlightening. Those wishing to fill out a questionnaire rather than identify their own positive and negative character traits can respond to these 25 questions and determine their individual traits.

17 Exercises To Discover & Unlock Strengths

Use these 17 Strength-Finding Exercises [PDF] to help others discover and leverage their unique strengths in life, promoting enhanced performance and flourishing.

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Introducing the concept of character to a younger audience can be difficult. But, utilizing easy-to-understand vocabulary and an interactive, visual, and fun process can assist in bringing the message home.

Teachers wishing to use the process in the classroom can take advantage of these freely available resources:

Character Traits Anchor Chart

Explaining the difference between internal and external character traits to children can be tough. By utilizing an “outside” and “inside” chart, students can begin to categorize their physical and personal traits. This technique can also be utilized to identify the differences between emotions (how a character feels) and traits (describes the personality).

Building Character in the Classroom

A rowdy classroom often leads to many impatient and distracted kids. In addition, students, especially those who live in lower-income areas, can carry a lot of emotional baggage, making it hard to stay motivated and concentrated on the subject at hand. For such situations, this is a great resource that suggests several ways for creating an inviting and an education-focused classroom.

The above research suggests that while personality traits are often hereditary and beyond our control, the things we value and believe in can reshape our character.

Expanding self-awareness is likely the first step in gaining control over one’s life. So it’s no wonder that “the most successful people are the most self-aware people” (Rosenfeld, 2016).

Awareness of others’ personalities can also be helpful, especially in situations like hiring someone for your company. And while there are many personality assessment tools to choose from, some are more consistent than others.

Cultivating an open, agreeable, and conscientious environment, whether in the office or at home, can help create values that are more conducive and supportive of growth and success. Using visualization tools to inspire, motivate, and spark interest in change is vital when aiming to align individuals and corporations toward a specific goal or mission.

Here is a great TED Talk by Dan Gilbert that summarizes this message:

Like Gilbert highlights in the video, it’s true that our personality traits are hereditary, but we still have the power to change. Our beliefs and values, which influence character, are not black or white—they adapt to our experiences and are heavily influenced by the different interactions and situations we engage in.

We are not static creatures, and just like nature, we are constantly changing. It is up to us to decide who we want to grow into. The best way to do that is to take note of where we currently are and then imagine where we want to go.

If change is the only constant, then the most successful people are those who control their own transformations.

We’d love to know your thoughts about personality and character. Have you ever taken a personality assessment, and if so, how accurate do you think it was? Do you think people can change their character? Let us know in the comments section.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Strengths Exercises for free .

• Ash, L. (2012, July 6). Can personality tests identify the real you? Retrieved from http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-18723950
• Bech, P., Lunde, M., & Moller, S. (2012, September 4). Eysenck’s Two Big Personality Factors and Their Relationship to Depression in Patients with Chronic Idiopathic Pain Disorder: A Clinimetric Validation Analysis . Retrieved from https://www.hindawi.com/journals/isrn/2012/140458/
• Bell, J. (2010, March 26). Is There a Difference Between Character and Personality? Retrieved from https://insights.inneractiveconsulting.com/is-there-a-difference-between-character-and-personality/
• Cardone, G. (2010, September 18). The 10 Traits of Failure . Retrieved from https://www.huffingtonpost.com/grant-cardone/the-10-traits-of-failure_b_722036.html
• Chamorro-Premuzic, T. (2016, July 19). Entrepreneurs? Four Worst Personality Traits And The One That Can Redeem Them . Retrieved from https://www.fastcompany.com/3061922/entrepreneurs-four-worst-personality-traits-and-the-one-that-can-redeem-them
• Costa, P. T., Jr., & Widiger, T. A. (2002). Introduction: Personality disorders and the five-factor model of personality. In P. T. Costa, Jr. & T. A. Widiger (Eds.), Personality disorders and the five-factor model of personality (p. 3–14). Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.
• Dingfelder, S. (2013, March). New study throws into doubt the universality of the Big Five.  Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/monitor/2013/03/big-five.aspx
• ETS. (2017) Retrieved from https://www.ets.org/s/workforce_readiness/pdf/21332_big_5.pdf
• Grant, A. (2013, September 18). Goodbye to MBTI, the Fad That Won’t Die . Retrieved from https://www.huffingtonpost.com/adam-grant/goodbye-to-mbti-the-fad-t_b_3947014.html
• Grant, A. (2015, November 17). MBTI, If You Want Me Back, You Need to Change Too. Adam Grant. Medium. Retrieved from https://medium.com/@AdamMGrant/mbti-if-you-want-me-back-you-need-to-change-too-c7f1a7b6970
• Half, R. (2016, March 4). 30 Character Traits of Mentally Strong People . Retrieved from https://www.roberthalf.com/blog/management-tips/30-character-traits-of-mentally-strong-people
• Heath, A., Jardine, R., Eaves, L., & Martin, N. (1988, June 13). The Genetic Structure of Personality -II . Retrieved from https://genepi.qimr.edu.au/contents/p/staff/CV080.pdf
• John, O., Naumann, L., & Soto, C. (n.d.). Paradigm Shift to the Integrative Big Five Trait Taxonomy . Retrieved from https://www.ocf.berkeley.edu/%7Ejohnlab/pdfs/2008chapter.pdf
• John, O., & Srivastava, S. (1999, March 5). The Big-Five Trait Taxonomy . Retrieved from John, O., & Srivastava, S. (1999, March 5). Retrieved from http://moityca.com.br/pdfs/bigfive_John.pdf
• Krznaric, R. (2013, May 15). Have we all been duped by the Myers-Briggs test? Retrieved from http://fortune.com/2013/05/15/have-we-all-been-duped-by-the-myers-briggs-test/
• Kurtus, R. (n.d.). Character versus Personality by Ron Kurtus – Understanding Character: School for Champions . Retrieved from http://www.school-for-champions.com/character/character_versus_personality.htm#.Wh2ivaOZNPO
• Lickerman, A. (2011, April 3). Personality vs. Character . Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/happiness-in-world/201104/personality-vs-character
• Morin, A. (2013, December 9). 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do | Amy Morin, LCSW. Retrieved from https://amymorinlcsw.com/mentally-strong-people/
• Pappas, S. (2017, November 16). Personality Traits & Personality Types: What is Personality? Retrieved from https://www.livescience.com/41313-personality-traits.html
• Rantanen, J., Metsäpelto, R. L., Feldt, T., Pulkkinen, L. E. A., & Kokko, K. (2007). Long‐term stability in the Big Five personality traits in adulthood. Scandinavian Journal of Psychology, 48(6) , 511-518.
• Rebollo, I., Herrero, O., & Colom, R. (2002, March 15). Personality in imprisoned and non-imprisoned people: evidence from the EPQ-R . Retrieved from http://www.psicothema.es/pdf/762.pdf
• Rosenfeld, J. (2016, August 26). Human nature is way too complex to be pinned down by personality tests . Retrieved from https://qz.com/766993/the-best-result-you-can-get-on-a-personality-test-is-one-that-you-dont-like/
• Watson, J. (2012). Educating the Disagreeable Extravert: Narcissism, the Big Five Personality Traits, and Achievement Goal Orientation . Retrieved from https://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/EJ977189.pdf
• Waude, A. (2017, June 14). Hans Eysenck’s PEN Model of Personality . Retrieved from https://www.psychologistworld.com/personality/pen-model-personality-eysenck
• Westerhoff, N. (2008, December 17). The “Big Five” Personality Traits . Retrieved from https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-big-five/

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What our readers think.

I’m 65 years old. Female. I just had a huge aha moment. I’m easily annoyed. That trait destroyed my career as a public school teacher, I’m pretty sure of that. Two people I care about are becoming increasingly hard to deal with. My roommate is in constant pain and does nothing but complain about his life. My sister is in early stages of cognitive decline. It has become work to talk to her. I want to switch my knee jerk reaction of annoyance to one of compassion. Any ideas?

Thank you for your vulnerable comment! I realize it’s a complex and brave thing to admit that you want to change how you respond to others.

Of course, I cannot give you an exact course of action, but I believe that taking the step to make this comment shows that you are committed to learning how to respond compassionately. While we offer several tools that aid in fostering self-compassion and positive communication, you might want to look into other resources that can help promote compassion-centered communication. You might want to look into The Compassionate Mind Foundation or these free Mindfulness & Compassion resources.

I hope this helps and good luck!

Kind regards, -Caroline | Community Manager

Interesting, sounds spot on to me, similar to Myers Briggs test results

Truly enjoyable. Covers the broad-spectrum. Well researched and informative. Thank you Johan de Wet

It’s interesting to note that we can be more joyful in the future by developing our character in a positive manner. It follows that our personality will be happier as well. Like bees to honey, we attract people we strive to be. Virtues, such as humility, honesty, peace, and gratitude are much better than vices, such as pride, greed, dishonesty, sloth, etc. Virtues give us hope for our future and are our greatest assets.

Fantastic information! This is very useful. Thank you!

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Describing a Person’s Personality: Examples and Tips

By: Author Paul Jenkins

Posted on October 6, 2023

Categories Creativity , Creative Writing , Self Improvement , Writing

Describing someone’s personality is an art that requires careful observation and attention to detail. Whether you are trying to describe your friend, a colleague, or a character in a story, understanding their personality traits is crucial to creating a vivid and engaging description.

In this article, we will explore different ways to describe a person’s personality, including positive and negative traits, using senses to describe personality, and the role of behavior in shaping personality.

To begin, it’s important to understand what personality is and how it influences a person’s behavior and actions. Personality is a set of traits, characteristics, and patterns of thought and behavior that define an individual’s unique identity.

Positive personality traits include kindness, honesty, creativity, and empathy, while negative traits include arrogance, selfishness, dishonesty, and impulsiveness. By understanding these traits, you can create a more nuanced and accurate description of a person’s personality.

One effective way to describe a person’s personality is by using the senses. By paying attention to how a person looks, sounds, smells, and feels, you can create a more vivid and engaging description that captures their essence.

Additionally, understanding how a person’s behavior and actions reflect their personality can provide valuable insights into their character and motivations. By exploring these different aspects of personality, you can create a more nuanced and compelling description that brings your subject to life.

Key Takeaways

• Understanding the different aspects of personality is crucial to creating an accurate and engaging description.
• Using senses to describe personality can provide valuable insights into a person’s character and identity.
• By exploring the role of behavior in shaping personality, you can create a more nuanced and compelling description that captures the essence of your subject.

Understanding Personality

Understanding a person’s personality is crucial in building strong relationships and creating a positive environment.

Personality refers to the unique patterns of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that distinguish one person from another. It is a product of both biology and environment and remains relatively consistent throughout life.

When describing a person’s personality, it is essential to consider their personality traits. Personality traits are enduring patterns of thought, feeling, and behavior that make up a person’s individuality.

The Big Five Personality Traits, also known as OCEAN, are widely accepted as a comprehensive model for describing personality. These include openness, conscientiousness, extroversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism.

Personality types are another way to understand a person’s personality.

Type A personalities are typically competitive, ambitious, and impatient, while Type B personalities are more relaxed, easy-going, and laid back. Type C personalities are introverted, detail-oriented, and analytical, while Type D personalities are anxious, negative, and socially inhibited.

Personality assessment tools are available to help individuals better understand their personality traits and types. These tools can be helpful in identifying strengths and weaknesses and providing insight into how to improve communication and relationships.

In conclusion, understanding personality is crucial in building strong relationships and creating a positive environment. By considering personality traits, types, and assessment tools, you can gain a better understanding of yourself and others.

Positive Personality Traits

When describing someone’s personality, positive traits are often the first to come to mind. These traits can make someone a joy to be around and are highly valued in personal and professional relationships.

Here are some positive personality traits to look for in others:

• Good : A person who is good is kind, caring, and considerate. They have a positive outlook on life and are always willing to lend a helping hand.
• Generous : Generosity is a trait that involves giving freely of one’s time, resources, and energy. A generous person is always looking for ways to help others and make a positive impact in the world.
• Kind : Kindness is a trait that involves treating others with compassion and empathy. A kind person is always looking for ways to make others feel appreciated and valued.
• Friendly : A friendly person is outgoing and approachable. They enjoy meeting new people and making connections with others.
• Pleasant : A pleasant person is easy to be around. They have a warm and welcoming personality that puts others at ease.
• Polite : Politeness involves showing respect and consideration for others. A polite person is always mindful of their manners and strives to make others feel comfortable.
• Honest : Honesty is a trait that involves telling the truth and being transparent. An honest person is trustworthy and dependable.
• Thoughtful : Thoughtfulness involves considering the needs and feelings of others. A thoughtful person is always looking for ways to make others feel appreciated and valued.
• Reliable : Reliability is a trait that involves being dependable and trustworthy. A reliable person follows through on their commitments and can be counted on to get things done.
• Courageous : Courage involves taking risks and standing up for what is right. A courageous person is willing to face challenges and overcome obstacles to achieve their goals.
• Happy : Happiness is a trait that involves having a positive outlook on life. A happy person is optimistic and enjoys spreading positivity to others.
• Smart : Intelligence is a trait that involves having a sharp mind and the ability to learn quickly. A smart person is knowledgeable and enjoys learning new things.
• Wise : Wisdom is a trait that involves having a deep understanding of life and the world around us. A wise person is thoughtful and reflective.
• Confident : Confidence involves having a strong belief in oneself and one’s abilities. A confident person is self-assured and capable.
• Compassionate : Compassion involves having empathy and concern for others. A compassionate person is always looking for ways to help others and make a positive impact in the world.
• Sympathetic : Sympathy involves feeling sorry for others and understanding their pain. A sympathetic person is empathetic and can relate to the struggles of others.
• Sensible : Sensibility involves having good judgment and making wise decisions. A sensible person is practical and level-headed.
• Brave : Bravery involves facing challenges and overcoming fear. A brave person is willing to take risks and stand up for what is right.
• Cheerful : Cheerfulness involves having a positive and upbeat attitude. A cheerful person is always looking for ways to spread joy and happiness to others.
• Empathetic : Empathy involves understanding and sharing the feelings of others. An empathetic person is compassionate and caring.
• Charismatic : Charisma involves having a magnetic personality that draws others in. A charismatic person is charming and likable.
• Authentic : Authenticity involves being true to oneself and one’s values. An authentic person is genuine and sincere.
• Proactive : Proactivity involves taking initiative and being proactive in achieving one’s goals. A proactive person is always looking for ways to improve themselves and their situation.
• Sincere : Sincerity involves being genuine and honest in one’s interactions with others. A sincere person is trustworthy and dependable.

These positive personality traits can make someone a joy to be around and are highly valued in personal and professional relationships.

Negative Personality Traits

Just like positive personality traits, negative personality traits can also be used to describe individuals. Negative personality traits are qualities that are generally not desirable and can affect how people perceive you. Here are some common negative personality traits that you should be aware of:

Mean and Cruel

Being mean and cruel to others is a negative personality trait that can make people avoid you. If you are constantly belittling others, making fun of them, or being sarcastic, you may be perceived as mean or cruel.

Dishonesty is another negative personality trait that can affect how people perceive you. If you are known for lying, cheating, or stealing, people may not trust you or want to be around you.

Selfishness is a negative personality trait that can make people see you as someone who only cares about themselves. If you are always putting your needs before others, people may not want to be friends with you or work with you.

Being rude to others is another negative personality trait that can make people avoid you. If you are constantly interrupting others, talking over them, or being dismissive, people may see you as rude.

Being nasty to others is a negative personality trait that can make people avoid you. If you are constantly insulting others, being aggressive, or using foul language, people may see you as nasty.

Being too serious all the time is a negative personality trait that can make people feel uncomfortable around you. If you are always serious and never seem to have fun, people may see you as uptight and unapproachable.

Being overly aggressive is a negative personality trait that can make people feel intimidated by you. If you are always getting into arguments, picking fights, or being confrontational, people may see you as aggressive.

Being too neutral or indifferent can also be a negative personality trait. If you never express your opinion or seem uninterested in what others have to say, people may see you as boring or disengaged.

Being overly nervous or anxious is a negative personality trait that can make people feel uncomfortable around you. If you are always fidgeting, sweating, or seem nervous, people may see you as high-strung or unreliable.

Being perceived as stupid is a negative personality trait that can affect how people perceive you. If you are constantly making mistakes, saying the wrong thing, or not understanding things, people may see you as unintelligent.

Dreary and Tedious

Being dreary and tedious is a negative personality trait that can make people avoid you. If you are always complaining, being negative, or talking about dull topics, people may see you as boring and uninteresting.

Being gloomy all the time is a negative personality trait that can make people feel uncomfortable around you. If you are always sad, depressed, or negative, people may see you as someone who brings down the mood.

Controlling

Being too controlling is a negative personality trait that can make people feel uncomfortable around you. If you are always trying to control the situation, micromanage others, or not allowing others to have a say, people may see you as controlling and overbearing.

Remember, negative personality traits can affect how people perceive you and can impact your relationships and career. It’s important to be aware of these traits and work on improving them if you want to be seen as a positive and likeable person.

Describing Personality Using Senses

When it comes to describing a person’s personality, using your senses can be a helpful tool. By paying attention to how someone looks, sounds, and behaves, you can get a sense of their personality without even talking to them. Here are some ways to describe personality using your senses:

The way a person looks can tell you a lot about their personality. For example, someone who always dresses in bright colors might be outgoing and extroverted, while someone who always wears black might be more introverted or reserved. You can also look at a person’s body language to get a sense of their personality. Someone who stands tall and makes eye contact might be confident and self-assured, while someone who slouches and avoids eye contact might be more insecure.

The way a person feels to be around can also give you a sense of their personality. Do they make you feel comfortable and at ease, or do they make you feel on edge? Someone who is warm and welcoming might be friendly and approachable, while someone who is cold and distant might be more reserved or introverted.

How a person treats others can also give you a sense of their personality. Someone who is always kind and considerate might be empathetic and compassionate, while someone who is rude or dismissive might be more self-centered or lacking in empathy.

The way a person speaks can also give you a sense of their personality. Someone who speaks softly and thoughtfully might be introverted or reflective, while someone who speaks loudly and confidently might be outgoing or assertive.

On the other hand, someone who speaks loudly and aggressively might be more confrontational or domineering, while someone who speaks softly and tentatively might be more submissive or lacking in confidence.

A person’s sense of humor can also give you a sense of their personality. Someone who is always cracking jokes might be outgoing and lighthearted, while someone who is more serious might be more introverted or analytical.

Finally, the way a person sounds can also give you a sense of their personality. Someone with a deep, resonant voice might be more confident and authoritative, while someone with a high-pitched voice might be more nervous or excitable.

How a person touches can also give you a sense of their personality. Someone who is always hugging might be more affectionate or emotional, while someone who avoids physical contact might be more guarded or reserved.

By paying attention to these sensory cues, you can get a sense of someone’s personality before even getting to know them. However, it’s important to remember that these cues are just one piece of the puzzle, and that everyone is complex and multifaceted.

The Role of Behavior in Personality

Behavior plays a crucial role in defining a person’s personality. It refers to the actions and reactions of an individual in response to different situations.

How a person behaves in different situations reflects their personality traits, attitudes, and approach towards life.

In a job setting, behavior is an important aspect that employers consider when hiring an employee.

A person’s behavior can determine how well they work with others, how they handle pressure, and how they respond to different challenges.

Employers look for individuals who have a positive attitude, are respectful, and have good communication skills.

When describing a person’s personality, behavior is one of the key factors to consider. It can be described using action words such as confident, assertive, friendly, or reserved.

Body language is also an important aspect of behavior as it can convey a lot about a person’s personality. For example, a person who stands tall and maintains eye contact can be seen as confident and self-assured.

Preferences and environment can also influence a person’s behavior. For example, a person who prefers a quiet and peaceful environment may behave differently in a loud and chaotic setting.

Similarly, a person’s psychological state can also affect their behavior. For instance, a person who is feeling anxious may behave in a more reserved and cautious manner.

In conclusion, behavior is an important aspect of personality that can reveal a lot about a person’s attitudes, approach, and ways of interacting with others. When describing a person’s personality, it is important to consider their behavior in different situations and how it reflects their personality traits.

Character Traits and Personal Growth

Understanding your character traits is an essential step towards personal growth. Your character traits represent your personality, morals, ethics, and beliefs.

They are the building blocks of your personality and define who you are as a person. Identifying your character traits can help you understand your strengths and weaknesses, which can lead to personal growth.

Your strengths are the positive character traits that you possess. They are the qualities that make you stand out and excel in certain areas. Knowing your strengths can help you leverage them to achieve your goals and pursue your passions. Some examples of strengths include honesty, creativity, perseverance, and empathy.

On the other hand, your weaknesses are the negative character traits that you possess. They are the qualities that hold you back and prevent you from reaching your full potential. Identifying your weaknesses can help you work on them and turn them into strengths.

Some examples of weaknesses include procrastination, impatience, indecisiveness, and selfishness.

Personal growth is the process of improving your character traits and becoming a better version of yourself. It involves self-reflection, self-awareness, and self-improvement. Personal growth can help you overcome your weaknesses, develop your strengths, and achieve your goals.

Characterization is the process of creating a character in a story or a play. It involves identifying the character’s traits, strengths, weaknesses, and motivations.

Characterization can help you understand the characters in a story and their actions.

Structure is the arrangement of elements in a story or a play. It involves the plot, the characters, the setting, and the theme. Structure can help you understand the story and its meaning.

In conclusion, understanding your character traits is crucial for personal growth. Knowing your strengths and weaknesses can help you leverage them to achieve your goals and become a better version of yourself. Personal growth involves self-reflection, self-awareness, and self-improvement. Characterization and structure can help you understand the characters in a story and the story itself. That story often includes you, in one way or another!

Examples of Describing Personality

When it comes to describing someone’s personality, there are a variety of adjectives that can be used. Adjectives are words that describe or modify a noun or pronoun.

Native speakers often use adjectives to describe people’s personalities, and there are many positive adjectives that can be used to describe someone in a favorable light.

For example, you might describe someone as “charismatic” if they have a magnetic personality that draws others to them. Or, you might describe someone as “compassionate” if they are kind and caring towards others.

Here are some example sentences using positive adjectives to describe someone’s personality:

• She is a very creative person who always comes up with innovative solutions to problems.
• He is a very reliable employee who always meets his deadlines and does excellent work.
• She is a very adventurous person who loves to explore new places and try new things.

When describing someone’s personality, it is important to include specific details that support your description.

For example, if you describe someone as “outgoing,” you might want to mention that they enjoy meeting new people and are always the life of the party. Including specific details helps to paint a more accurate picture of the person you are describing.

Narration is another effective way to describe someone’s personality. By telling a story about the person, you can convey their personality traits in a more engaging way.

For example, you might tell a story about how your friend always goes out of their way to help others, demonstrating their kindness and generosity.

Brainstorming is also a helpful tool when describing someone’s personality. Take some time to jot down all of the adjectives that come to mind when you think of the person you are describing. Then, use those adjectives to craft a more detailed description of their personality.

Finally, don’t be afraid to revise your description as needed. As you gather more information about the person, you may discover new personality traits that you want to include in your description. By revising your description, you can create a more accurate and comprehensive picture of the person’s personality.

Frequently Asked Questions

What are some words that can be used to describe a person’s personality characteristics.

When describing someone’s personality, you can use words such as outgoing, friendly, adventurous, creative, reliable, honest, trustworthy, and intelligent. These words can help paint a picture of someone’s character and give insight into their behavior and actions.

What are some deep and meaningful words that can be used to describe a person?

If you want to go deeper and describe someone’s personality more meaningfully, you can use words such as empathetic, compassionate, philosophical, introspective, intuitive, spiritual, and insightful. These words can help convey someone’s inner thoughts, feelings, and motivations.

How can you effectively describe a person’s personality in writing?

When describing someone’s personality in writing, it’s important to be specific and provide examples. Use descriptive language to paint a picture of the person’s behavior, actions, and thoughts. You can also use anecdotes or stories to illustrate their personality traits.

What are some negative adjectives that can be used to describe a person’s personality?

While it’s important to focus on positive traits when describing someone’s personality, there may be times when negative adjectives are necessary. Some negative adjectives that can be used to describe someone’s personality include selfish, arrogant, rude, aggressive, pessimistic, and dishonest.

Can you provide an example of an essay that describes a person’s personality?

Here is an example of an essay that describes someone’s personality:

John is a kind and compassionate person who always puts others before himself. He is empathetic and always tries to understand other people’s perspectives. John is also very creative and loves to express himself through art and music. He is a reliable and trustworthy friend who is always there when you need him.

What are some examples of words that can be used to describe someone’s special personality traits?

Everyone has unique personality traits that make them who they are. Some examples of words that can be used to describe someone’s special personality traits include adventurous, curious, persistent, resilient, adaptable, and ambitious. These words can help capture someone’s individuality and what makes them stand out from others.

41 Toxic Personality Traits To Spot in Yourself And Others

Learn to identify and fix toxic traits within yourself, and also discover what to do when there are toxic people in your life and how to relate with them.

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The victim who blames everyone but themself. The person who only talks about themself. The martyr who makes sacrifices themself for you, even though you didn’t want them to. 

Do you recognize any of these personality traits?

We all know toxic people, and many of us have some toxic traits ourselves.

In this article, we’ll go over the top 41 toxic traits so you can learn to spot them and let go of them.

What Are Toxic Traits?

Toxic traits are harmful behavior patterns that cause emotional harm to oneself or others. They typically stem from deep-seated issues and can damage relationships. Most toxic traits come about from a lack of self-awareness and ignorance of how one is impacting others.

Why Do People Act Toxically?

While there are a ton of different toxic traits, toxicity tends to stem from one or more of the following:

• Insecurity: A lack of self-esteem can drive people to overcompensate in all kinds of ways.
• Past trauma: What was once a helpful survival strategy has now become a dysfunctional coping mechanism.
• Fear of vulnerability: Many people are terrified of sharing their hurt or their feelings and will go to great lengths to avoid doing so.
• Lack of understanding of impact. Many people haven’t built their empathy muscles and have no idea how deeply their behavior is impacting others.

The Top 10 Toxic Traits

Before getting into the whole list, let’s go over a quick summary of 10 of the most common toxic traits to look out for. If someone has one of these traits, it can be very difficult to form a healthy relationship with them.

• Playing the victim: This is when someone thinks that everything is happening to them and everyone is out to get them. They are unable to take responsibility for any of their choices or circumstances, and nothing is ever their fault.
• Takes everything personally: These folks assume that everything is a personal attack. Trying to give them feedback is nearly impossible because they think you’re trying to hurt them.
• People pleasing: People pleasers hide their own personalities and preferences to try to get other people to like them. It’s hard to trust people-pleasers because they will sacrifice their own truth in pursuit of external validation.
• Entitlement: These folks think they deserve more than everyone else. They think their life should be easy and they shouldn’t have to work for anything.
• Guilt-tripping: Guilt-trippers are folks who will manipulate you to do what they want by evoking guilt in you. They’ll say things like, “I knew you didn’t really care about me.”
• Creates drama: These folks are always gossipping and stirring up unnecessary conflicts. If you are close to one of these folks, you’ll get caught in an endless spree of emotional chaos.
• Holding grudges: Some folks can’t forgive and let go. They’ll hold on to that time four years ago when you lost your temper and secretly hold it against you.
• Boundary violating: Some people will constantly push your boundaries over and over and over again. It can be hard to feel safe and respected with such folks.
• Passive aggressiveness: These people are afraid of conflict, and instead of ever having a difficult conversation, they will subtly take out their hurt on people by not laughing at their jokes or giving silent treatment.
• Martyrdom: Martyrs feel the need to prove their worth by sacrificing themself. These people will seek out unnecessary suffering and wear it as a badge of honor. They can be hard to relate with because they’re constantly trying to save you, whether you want them to or not.

Now, let’s dive into the full list!

List of 41 Toxic Traits

Below are 41 of the most common and harmful toxic traits.

See which traits people in your life display and which ones you might also display.

Not Speaking Out

Toxic traits are not always action-based. Not speaking out goes hand in hand with insincerity.

Not speaking out can look like this:

• During work meetings, you stay quiet even though you have ideas and solutions to contribute. 
• At parties, you hold back on sharing your takes out of fear of being “too much.” 
• On group vacations, you go along with what everyone else wants to do even though you don’t want to. 

Did you know you can be nice AND assertive? Assertiveness is a trait of confidence and self-assurance without the use of aggression. 

Being assertive does not mean being rude or brash with others. It’s about saying yes to yourself in a respectful way. Check out the nice person’s guide to being assertive !

How to tell if you are toxically not speaking out: You feel afraid to share your desires and opinions. You struggle to say “no.”

How to start speaking out: Start small on things like food and plans. The next time someone asks what you want to eat or what you want to do when you hang out, share an authentic desire!

How to handle someone in your life who doesn’t speak out: If you know someone who never speaks out, ask them for their honest opinion on a topic (even something like “cats or dogs”). Then, listen kindly and ask questions.

Perfectionism

Perfectionists display toxic behaviors that are often controlling with their ultra-high standards and over-willingness to achieve perfection. Nothing is ever good enough.

Does this sound like you or someone you know?

This is a problem many creatives face. And a reason why their work never sees the light of day.

Type A Personalities are most likely to be perfectionists and are prone to overworking themselves and having high-stress levels. Thankfully, the Type A Survival Guide can help!

How to tell if you are a toxic perfectionist: Nothing you do is ever good enough. Nothing anyone else does is good enough, either.

What to do if you are a toxic perfectionist: What’s the area of your life you are most perfectionist in? Let’s say it’s writing. Then, pick up a book and see if you can read with the goal of only seeing the good in what the author wrote.

How to handle a toxic perfectionist in your life: Invite them into an activity where imperfection is the goal, like finger painting or improv comedy.

Toxic Positivity

Have you ever been around someone who fakes happiness? They say things like…

• “It’ll be fine, don’t worry.”
• “Just be happy!”

When you can tell, there is a repressed swamp of pain right underneath the surface.

It’s completely normal to feel negative feelings, and it’s called emotional diversity 1 https://bpspsychub.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/bjep.12436#:~:text=In%20recent%20years%2C%20the%20concept,for%20mental%20and%20physical%20health. !

The best way to combat toxic positivity is to accept all your emotions. Check out 10 Ways to Overcome Toxic Positivity for more info!

How to tell if you are toxically positive:  Do you view certain emotions as “bad?” Do you push down your anger, grief, or sadness? 

What to do if you are toxically positive : Give yourself permission to experience and express a full range of emotions, not just positivity, understanding that all feelings are valid and can coexist.

How to handle a toxically positive person in your life: listening ear for your problems, without the immediate redirection to positivity.

Dishonesty degrades mutual trust, the foundation of all relationships. Philosopher Immanuel Kant believed if everyone lied, nobody would believe anything they were told! 

Lying during job interviews is shockingly common. According to social psychologist Ron Friedman , 81% of people lie during job interviews. This technique may sound like an easy way to snag a position, but it may be counterproductive for you and your employer.  

Keep an eye out for The Fibber , toxic deceivers in your life that ring your intuition alarm bells when you hear them speak. 

Have you ever wondered what happens to your and others’ body language when lying? A common tell is a distancing cue when liars physically distance themselves by stepping back or leaning back in a chair. Learning to spot deception is an essential life skill; check out the Lie Detection course to learn how to spot lies, read body language, and build honest relationships. 

How to tell if you are a toxic liar: Reflect on the following:

• Are there moments where you find yourself straying from the truth for no significant reason?
• Do friends or family members often call you out for not being truthful?
• Have your lies led to negative outcomes for others or yourself?

What to do if you are a toxic liar: Try going a day without telling even the tiniest of lies. Notice your impulses to fib and stretch the truth. If you want to take it a step further, try reading this short book about lying.

How to handle a toxic liar in your life: If you catch them lying, don’t pretend what they say is true. Hold to your own principles and create distance if needed.

Want to learn how to deal with difficult people? Watch our webinar below:

Insincerity

Showing up as anything other than your authentic self is a surefire way to put up a wall between yourself and everyone else.

Insincerity can look like this:

• Faking your way through social interactions.
• Self-censoring during conversations.
• Craving fame and popularity over a genuine connection.

But how can you “just be yourself”? What does that even mean? If you’re wondering this, you may be having an authenticity crisis.

Being vulnerable can be scary, but we need to dig deeper if we want genuine connection.

How to tell if you are toxically insincere: Keep a sincerity journal. For one week, write down instances where you feel you may not have been genuine. Note what prompted your insincerity and how it made you feel afterward. This will help you identify patterns and understand the extent of the behavior.

What to do if you are toxically insincere: Try the following:

• Assume intimacy with people before you have it by talking to strangers like you would talk to a friend. During your next job interview, treat the interviewer like an existing colleague!
• Realize that everyone may not like you, which is fine—relevancy is not a numbers game.

How to handle a toxically insincere person in your life: When you notice insincerity, address it by expressing how it makes you feel and why honesty is important to you. Remember, though, you cannot force someone to change; they must want to change themselves.

Here’s an example of comedian Andrew Shulz calling out an interviewer for being insincere. If you do choose to communicate your feelings, it’s probably helpful to be a bit softer and more nuanced than this example!

Playing The Victim

Playing the victim is a mindset many of us don’t even realize we are adopting during difficult times. It’s a defense mechanism many of us employ to escape responsibility or get attention.

But living as a victim is one of the most disempowering perspectives you can take because it assumes that life happens to you and you have no say in your circumstances.

The best way to combat playing the victim in your personal life is to improve your mindset and habits by taking responsibility and being honest with yourself. Get away from any victims! 

In a work environment, set clear boundaries, keep a detailed record, and consult human resources. Use the toxic coworker survival guide !

How to tell if you are a toxic victim: Do you ever catch yourself saying, “It’s not my fault!”—especially in response to feedback? Do you enjoy it when people feel bad for you? Are you unsatisfied with your life circumstances but do nothing to make a change?

What to do if you are a toxic victim: Challenge your victim mentality by taking responsibility where you can. Start with small situations where you might typically blame others and instead ask yourself, “What role did I play in this, and how could I have changed the outcome?” 

How to handle a toxic victim in your life: When someone around you plays the victim, refuse to buy into their frame. No matter how much they see themselves as a victim, challenge yourself to see them as empowered and capable.

Cheating is when you break a set of agreements you have with another person.

Whether cheating while playing games or infidelity in romantic relationships, all forms are examples of toxic traits that destroy relationships. For instance, infidelity is the most common cause 2 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2352250X16300227 of divorce. 

According to social psychology founder Kurt Lewin, when it comes to playing games 3 https://boardgamegeek.com/blogpost/77316/psychology-cheating , players are more likely to cheat the more anonymous they are.

In romantic relationships, cheaters tend to display the following:

• They lie about where they go and who they are with. 
• Their mood goes up and down. They are more happy and sad than usual. 
• They get defensive when you ask who they are talking to. 
• Increased phone use an hour before bedtime. 
• Less frequent deep conversations, date nights, and sex.  

The signs may be subtle—either way, you deserve to have loving and trusting people in your life ! 

How to tell if you are a toxic cheater: Do you feel like rules and agreements don’t apply to you? Would you rather win a game than play by the rules? Or that if your partner knew all of your behavior, they’d be devastated?

What to do if you are a toxic cheater: Think back to the times you cheated recently. Then ask yourself, “How would I feel if the other person were the one cheating?”

How to handle a toxic cheater in your life: Set a time to have an honest and calm discussion with the cheater. Express the impact of their actions on you and the relationship.  

Dealing with toxic people is never easy. But it can be especially hard at work when you are forced to spend time with people you might not otherwise. If you’d like some tips on how to navigate toxic folks in the workplace, you might appreciate this free guide:

How to Deal With Difficult People At Work

Do you have a difficult boss? Colleague? Client? Learn how to transform your difficult relationship. I’ll show you my science-based approach to building a strong, productive relationship with even the most difficult people.

Taking Things Personally

Has a friend ever made a light-hearted comment that pushed your buttons? 

What taking things personally looks like:

• You let the opinions of others dictate how you feel about yourself.
• You have a habit of getting upset when given constructive criticism.
• Your boss makes a harmless comment about your mistake, and you overthink the interaction.

How to tell if you take things too personally: If you feel like you can’t go a day without feeling like someone made you feel bad.

What to do if you take things too personally: The next time you get offended, reserve judgment and ask for clarification. “What did you mean by that comment about my performance? Was it genuine?”

How to handle someone who takes things too personally: When you need to provide feedback, frame it constructively. Instead of saying, “You weren’t thorough enough,” try saying, “You covered the topic well, and I think this project could be even more powerful if you added some detail.”

Seeking The Validation of Others

Like most toxic traits and behaviors, seeking the validation of others is a basic human tendency. 

Toxicity comes in when we make our mental health and emotional wellness solely on what others think of us.

Examples of typical validation seekers:

• The coworker who constantly needs reassurance that they are doing a good job.
• That one person who tries too hard to get everyone to like them by molding their personality to whoever they meet.
• The friend that has low self-esteem and looks for their worth in other people.

How to tell if you are toxically seeking validation: Do you notice that your self-worth rises and falls like the stock market, depending on whether you are “good” or “bad” in others’ eyes?

What to do if you are toxically seeking validation: Can you practice giving validation to yourself? See if you can find a young part of yourself that is craving love and validation, and see if you can give that part what it needs.

How to handle someone toxically seeking validation in your life: Don’t take responsibility for their feelings. Be yourself with them, and if they spiral into needing validation, stay within your boundaries and don’t take on their emotions.

People Pleasing 

Is saying yes a habit of yours? 

Do you apologize a lot… Like a lot, a lot?

You may be a people pleaser! 

Thankfully, we have a comprehensive guide. Check out these tips to stop being a people pleaser . 

What to do if you are a toxic people pleaser: Next time someone asks something of you, don’t say yes right away! Instead, try “I’ll get back to you on that!”.

How to handle a toxic people pleaser in your life: Support their independence! Encourage them to make decisions based on what’s best for them, not just to accommodate you.

Inflexibility

A stubborn and inflexible mindset makes you prone to toxic behaviors and generally unlikeable.

Do you know someone who sticks to their guns even when faced with contradictory evidence? They can be difficult to be around and make everything more challenging than it needs to be. 

According to the American Psychological Association, adopting a flexible mindset is the best way to combat this.

How to tell if you are toxically inflexible: Do you become anxious when routines are disrupted or when unexpected changes occur? Do you dislike trying new activities? Do you fear change?

What to do if you are toxically inflexible: Pick an opinion that you hold. Then, challenge yourself to write a few sentences that make a case for the opposite opinion.

How to handle a toxically inflexible person in your life: When proposing a change or new plan, first show understanding for their discomfort with change. Then explain the reasons and benefits clearly and give advance notice when possible.

Judging Others

Passing judgment on others is ultimately a toxic projection, a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. 

People tend to view others as having more ability to voluntarily change their beliefs than they perceive themselves to have, which causes them to judge others’ beliefs, according to research 4 http://www.coreycusimano.net/docs/Cusimano_Goodwin_2020_JPSP.pdf . 

How to tell if you are toxically judgemental:  Evaluate how frequently you try to put yourself in someone else’s shoes or whether you dismiss their perspectives outright. Is everyone stupid, wrong, or just getting in your way?

What to do if you are toxically judgemental: When someone does something, and you feel the urge to judge them, realize your faults and ask yourself, “How am I like the person I am judging?”

How to handle a toxically judgemental person in your life: If you’re being judged, visualize an energetic bubble that protects you from them. Their judgments bounce right off your bubble and get returned to sender.

Jealousy is when you feel insecure that a partner or friend is giving their attention to someone else.

Jealousy takes different forms. Here are a few:

• Lack of trust in your partner
• Feeling envious of other people, like they are better than you
• Feeling insecure and not good enough
• Fearing that your partner will betray you (perhaps from past trauma)
• An expression of anxious attachment
• Feeling like your partner is your possession
• Lacking independence in a relationship

How to tell if you are toxically jealous: Do you feel territorial when your partner gives attention to another person? Do you feel resentment when others experience success?

What to do if you are toxically jealous: Acknowledge your feelings of jealousy without acting on them. And vulnerably voice your feelings to your partner.

How to handle a  toxically jealous person in your life: Be clear that their behavior affects your relationship. Without shaming them, encourage them to speak about their insecurities and offer support. At the same time, set boundaries, and don’t let their jealousy rule your life.

Ignoring Self-Care

Self-neglect is the toxic tendency to ignore one’s own basic needs. 

Have you ever worked through lunch multiple days in a row? 

How to tell if you are toxically ignoring self-care: 

• After a stressful day, you scroll through social media instead of taking a calming bath.
• Going to the gym a couple of times and giving up because you didn’t see results.
• Neglecting your basic needs like sleeping and exercising to achieve more in your social or professional life.

What to do if you are toxically ignoring self-care: Fill up your tank before you fill others. Before you do something for someone, ask yourself, “Have I attended to all of MY needs?”

How to handle a person toxically ignoring self-care: Lead by example and share your own self-care experiences to inspire them. But also recognize that you can’t change their behaviors.

Being Overly Competitive

Competitiveness is toxic when the need to win drives a wedge between relationships, and everything becomes something you must be the best at.

How to tell if you are toxically competitive: 

• You take simple competitions like trivia night with friends very seriously.
• You focus more on winning than having fun during low-stakes events.
• You’re a perfectionist about competing and lashing out when others don’t meet your standards.

What to do if you are toxically competitive:

• Accept that you have a competitive nature and use it for the best! This can look like joining intramural sports. 
• Accept failure as an opportunity for growth instead of a negative event.
• Channel your desire to win by learning how to coach others and teach them the skills you are so passionate about! 

How to handle a toxically competitive person: Try to reroute their competitiveness into teamwork and working toward a common goal.

Believing that you’re superior to everyone else is one of the most undesirable traits to be on the receiving end of. 

Arrogance looks like this:

• That one guy who thinks he knows everything.
• That family member who can’t seem to understand what it’s like to be in someone else’s shoes.
• The friend who is rude to waiters and cashiers. 

How do you tell if you are toxically arrogant? Do you feel like you’re better, smarter, or more capable than everyone else? Do you feel like nobody has as good of ideas as you? Do you find you tend to look down on people more than eye to eye?

What to do if you are toxically arrogant: Make a list of several people in your life and the ways in which you look up to each of them.

How to handle a toxically arrogant person: If they try to look down on you, don’t accept their frame. Continue to look at them as a peer, no matter how they seem to view you.

Excessively Comparing Oneself To Others

We all have an innate tendency to evaluate ourselves in comparison to others. 

Toxicity happens when we don’t know how to stop the comparison from impacting our self-esteem.

Here are 15 in-depth tips to help you stop comparing yourself to others.

How to tell if you are toxically comparative: You’re constantly thinking about how your peers are doing and how you’re falling behind or not doing as well as others, to the point where it’s impacting your self-esteem.

What to do if you are toxically comparative: Try encouraging someone else. Orienting toward being helpful can get you out of your own head.

How to handle a toxically comparative person: Become a beacon of support! Reflect back on their strengths and celebrate even their smallest achievements.

Lack of presence in conversation

Doesn’t it feel nice when you are talking with someone, and they give you their full attention? They make great eye contact and seem to absorb every word and emotion you express. They are completely undistracted and with you.

Compare that to the feeling of talking with someone while they look bored. They keep looking at their phone and seem distracted with everyone else nearby.

When someone can’t be present in a conversation, it’s really hard to connect with them!

One of the most flagrant cases of this is when some “phubs” you. Which stands for “phone snub,” and it refers to when they whip out their phone mid-conversation. It turns out nearly 32 percent 5 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0747563216303454 of people reported being phubbed 2-3 times daily!

Phubbing is a toxic behavior since it is overwhelmingly perceived as rude and inconsiderate.

For a more comprehensive guide, check out Phubbing: How to Deal with People Who Won’t Make Eye Contact !

How to tell if you are a toxic phubber: Do you use your phone when you’re talking with other people?

What to do if you are a toxic phubber: The next social engagement you have, either put your plane on airplane mode or leave it in your bag the whole time!

How to handle a toxic phubber in your life: Be direct: “I’ll wait for you to finish.”

A Sense of Entitlement

People with a sense of entitlement often come from a background of privilege and have had the world handed to them on a silver platter. Privilege does not equal entitlement, of course. 

Entitlement is when you expect life to go your way, things to be easy, and people to agree with you. It’s when you’re ignorant of the struggles of others. Some part of you thinks you’re royalty, and everyone else is a serf.

Our guide on 4 Types of Difficult People and How to Deal With Them could totally help!

How to tell if you are toxically entitled: Do you expect preferential treatment? Do you believe you deserve success without effort? 

What to do if you are toxically entitled: Try a day of volunteering where you will get exposed to different life perspectives.  

How to handle a toxically entitled person in your life: Don’t buy into their entitled frame. Entitlement is a way of seeing the world where they think they deserve more than others. Treat them like a peer who deserves as much as everyone else.

Selfishness

Selfishness is a key trait of narcissists . 

• They make everything about themselves.
• They only ever care about themselves.
• They cause everyone around them an immense amount of frustration!

It’s okay to be self-centered sometimes. But when you can’t get out of that mode, it’s a problem!

How to tell if you are toxically selfish: Do you tend to think of other people when they’re not around? Do you often imagine how other people are feeling? Do you wonder how you’re impacting other people?

What to do if you are toxically selfish: In your next conversation, spend the whole time actively imagining how the other person is feeling as they are talking.

How to handle a toxically selfish person in your life: If you can, let them know how their selfishness is impacting you. If nothing changes, consider investing less emotionally in the relationship.

Stuck in the Past

The only good thing that comes from reliving the past is if you are trying to learn from it. 

The toxicness happens when you dwell and long for times that are no longer here.

It’s called the present for a reason!

How to tell if you are toxically stuck in the past: Do you often think about the good old days? Do you feel like you’re past your prime? Do you often cycle in regret over the past?

What to do if you are toxically stuck in the past:

• Forgive those who hurt you in the past, even if they have yet to apologize. 
• When you relive the past, look around the room you’re in and point out five objects that will ground you to the present.

How to handle a person toxically stuck in the past in your life: If you must connect with them, try to do activities that force you into the present, like biking or pottery.

Holding On To Loss

Grief is a natural response to loss. The difficult truth is that without loss, there cannot be life. Holding onto loss is toxic since it delays healing and prolongs suffering.

It is important to be aware of the Stages of Grief and seek therapy if grief is prolonged. You deserve to heal and make peace with your loss.

How to tell if you are toxically holding on to loss: Are your thoughts dominated by what you’ve lost, to the point where it impedes your daily functioning or ability to enjoy new experiences?  

What to do if you are toxically holding on to loss: Go into the feelings of loss and feel them all the way through.

How to handle a person who is toxically holding on to loss in your life: Offer a compassionate ear and validate their feelings of loss without judgment.  

Negative Self Talk

Self-talk is how most people process situations and allows for reflection and the potential for heightened awareness.

On the other hand, negative self-talk is when our internal monologue turns into unnecessary self-defeating narratives.

One famous study 6 https://www.researchgate.net/profile/James-Hardy/publication/278026499_Awareness_and_Motivation_to_Change_Negative_Self-Talk/links/5579b30d08aeacff2003c950/Awareness-and-Motivation-to-Change-Negative-Self-Talk.pdf found that the people surveyed who used a logbook to track their negative self-talk gained a greater awareness of their habits and motivation to change!

How to tell if you are a toxic self-talker: Write down your thoughts throughout the day. Are they mostly positive, neutral, or negative?

What to do if you are a toxic self-talker: When a thought comes up, write it down and ask yourself, “Would I say this to a friend I treasure?”

How to handle a toxic self-talker in your life: Be a loving friend. They can only make a change in themself if they want to. But your support will go a long way.

Attention Seeking

Have you ever been around someone exaggerating their distress just to get more attention?

It’s not inherently bad to want attention, nor is it a character flaw. It is all about how you get that attention, according to research 7 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/324187856_An_Investigation_of_Attention-Seeking_Behavior_through_Social_Media_Post_Framing . 

How to tell if you are a toxic attention seeker: Do you wear certain clothes, take up particular hobbies, or alter your personality for attention? 

What to do if you are a toxic attention seeker: Notice the next time you are modifying your behavior to get attention, then pause and ask yourself why you want the attention. See what comes up and if you can give yourself what you want from others.

How to handle a toxic attention seeker in your life: Reward them with attention when they are asking for it appropriately.

Resisting New Experiences

Some people are naturally resistant to new experiences since they are low in openness. 

How to tell if you are toxically resistant to new experiences: 

• You cut yourself from family by declining invitations to events out of your comfort zone.
• You refuse to get your haircut when your favorite barber quits.
• You turn down networking opportunities out of anxiety.

What to do if you are toxically resistant to new experiences: 

• Start small by trying out a new book, movie, or TV show—focus on trying it out. You don’t have to finish if you don’t like it. 
• Become comfortable with the uncertainty of trying new things by reframing it as a fun activity!
• Spend more time in nature, visit museums, and attend a music festival.

How to handle a person who is toxically resistant to new experiences in your life: Introduce a new experience gradually, starting with small changes that don’t feel overwhelming. 

Manipulation

The exploitation of others to get what you want is a huge red flag of toxic people and is known to cause others distress and, at worst, trauma disorders. They might lie, lovebomb, or gaslight.

How to tell if you are a toxic manipulator: Do you often influence situations or people to get your way, regardless of others’ feelings? Do you use guilt, deceit, or pressure as tools for persuasion?

What to do if you are a toxic manipulator: The next time you feel an impulse to manipulate, reflect on where the desire is coming from—is it for control, fear of vulnerability, or something else?

How to handle a toxic manipulator in your life: 

• Realize they are attempting to find inner fulfillment through hurting others.
• Set boundaries with them right away.
• Don’t make excuses for their bad behavior. Get out while you can!

Guilt-tripping

Guilt is a powerful emotion. Guilt trippers are experts in inducing guilt in other people as blackmail to get what they want.

How to tell if you are a toxic guilt-tripper: Do you make others feel guilty to get what you want or to control their behavior? Do people do things for you out of obligation rather than choice? 

What to do if you are a toxic guilt-tripper: The next time you catch yourself guilt-tripping someone, take a pause and instead ask for what you want.

How to handle a toxic guilt-tripper in your life:

• Express your perspective by describing how they are using guilt against you.
• Let them know you have no interest in resenting them and would like to mend.
• Explain how it makes you feel to be guilt-tripped.

Worrying About The Future

Some people live in the past, and some can’t stop worrying about the future. 

Both are toxic since they distract us from our present moment. 

Worrying about the future is being afraid of the unknown and is existential in nature.

You aren’t alone. Anytime people are surveyed 8 https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/?tab=1 , they almost always include “worrying about the future” as something they deal with weekly.

How to tell if you are a toxic worrier: Is your worrying disruptive to your daily life or negatively affecting your relationships? Are you unable to control the worry despite rational evidence? Does your worry cause insomnia? 

What to do if you are a toxic worrier: Make peace with the unknown and reframe it as your destined adventure to embark on!

How to handle a toxic worrier in your life: Help them focus on what they can control and take action on rather than on uncertainties.

Participating in Drama

You know those types of people…

That group of coworkers that always gossip during lunch outings.

Your family member is trying to gossip with you at the latest family outing.

The long-time friend that loves to “spill the tea” every time you see them…

We’ve all participated in drama! Ultimately, this is a toxic habit.

How to tell if you are toxically dramatic: Do you tend to exaggerate situations, create conflict where there is none, or seek attention through drama?

What to do if you are toxically dramatic: If there is someone you find yourself stirring drama toward, reflect on what feelings you have about them and if there’s a conversation you need to have with them to clear the air.

How to handle a toxically dramatic person in your life: Set limits with drama starters. “I’m not comfortable talking about that. What have you been up to?”

Holding Grudges 

Did you know holding grudges is bad for you? A study found that “chronic unforgiving” is negative for health, and forgiving enhances it 9 https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/0887044042000196674 ! 

How to tell if you are a toxic grudge-holder: Do you dwell on past slights or cannot move past them, even when they’re minor or resolved? Do you feel resentment toward multiple people? Do you feel like people have wronged you?

What to do if you are a toxic grudge-holder:

• When someone wrongs you, take time to process what happened and make an active effort to forgive them.
• If they haven’t apologized, imagine in your mind what they did to help you make peace with them. 
• Think of it this way: Your health is on the line, and forgiveness is good for your health.

How to handle a toxic grudge-holder in your life: Encourage dialogue about the grudge they’re holding to understand their feelings. If they feel understood, it might loosen the grip on their grudge.

Ah, the needy wretches! 

We all have a needy side of ourselves. But when someone clings to others for constant affirmation, disregards boundaries, and places a heavy emotional burden on their relationships, then their neediness has turned them into a full-on emotional vampire. 

How to tell if you are toxically needy: Do you need constant validation? Have you ever been called clingy? Do you tend to take more than you give? 

What to do if you are toxically needy: The next time you notice yourself feeling needy, see if you can be with your own emotions and solve your challenge by yourself.

How to handle a toxically needy person in your life: Boundaries , boundaries, boundaries! Get clear on how much you can give, and hold to your own limits.

Conversational Narcissism

This is when, no matter what the conversation is, you make it about you.

Someone tells you their cat died, and then you start talking about your cat.

Someone tells you about how frustrating their workday was, and then you start talking about your job.

It’s natural in conversations to share about yourself. But when it’s always about you, then people will start avoiding you.

How to tell if you are a toxic conversational narcissist: You never ask questions in conversations. When someone expresses pain, you always put the attention back on yourself.

What to do if you are a toxic conversational narcissist: In your next conversation, practice putting your attention on the other person. Ask questions and explore their experience. 

How to handle a toxic conversational narcissist in your life: If you’re comfortable giving them feedback, then try doing so. If not, then don’t ask them questions because they’ll just talk more about themself. Use it as a chance to practice telling your own stories.

Boundary Violating

You know those people who seem to constantly push, press, and poke at your boundaries? When your “no” never feels strong enough?

These folks disregard others’ limits and blow past boundaries and rules to get what they want. 

How to tell if you are a toxic violator: Do you tend to view others’ boundaries as something annoying? When someone says “no,” is your tendency to keep pushing?

What to do if you are a toxic violator: The next time someone sets a boundary to you, take a pause and say, “Thank you for your boundary.”

How to handle a toxic violator in your life: Be very clear on your boundaries. When they cross a boundary, call it out. If it keeps happening, create distance.

Control Freak

Toxic control freaks compulsively dictate every aspect of their environment. Every speck of dust must be in order!

They also control the people around them to maintain order.

Being around control freaks is tense, to say the least.

How to tell if you are a toxic control freak: Do you feel an intense need to manage all aspects of your environment and people’s actions around you? Is it hard for you to give control to others?

What to do if you are a toxic control freak: Pick one task this week to delegate. It could be asking your partner to chop the onions or hiring someone to clean your home.

How to handle a toxic control freak in your life: Communicate clearly that you need autonomy. Let them know how their controlling behavior is making you feel.

Passive Aggressive

People who exhibit toxic passive-aggressive behavior feel anger or resentment, but they don’t overtly express their emotions.

Instead, they express their upsetness through indirect, subtle actions, like avoiding someone when they come into a room, not laughing at someone’s jokes, or undermining someone’s successes with an eye-roll.

How to tell if you are toxically passive-aggressive: When you feel hurt or angry with someone, do you tell them? If you tend to bury conflict or run from it, then chances are, your feelings are squirting out through passive-aggressive behavior.

What to do if you are toxically passive-aggressive: Practice being direct! The next time you feel hurt by someone, let them know.

How to handle a toxically passive-aggressive person in your life: don’t take the bait. The next time someone does something to you that you think could be passive-aggressive, take a breath before responding.

Volatile Exploder

These people have unpredictable emotional responses. One second, they’re calm; the next moment, they’re euphoric; and the next moment, they are a volcano erupting with rage. 

When someone is volatile, it’s hard to feel safe, and the ground around them becomes eggshells.

How to tell if you are toxically volatile: Do you have frequent, intense emotional outbursts that seem disproportionate to the situation? Does your mood shift rapidly and unpredictably? 

What to do if you are toxically volatile: Try practicing 5 minutes of meditation a day.

How to handle a toxically volatile person in your life: Don’t let their emotions in. And never assume their emotions are your fault.

Toxically pessimistic people always see the worst. 

If they win the lottery, they focus on the taxes they’d have to pay. If they hit their running goal, they focus on why they didn’t do better.

Spending time with pessimists is the ultimate morale killer. 

How to tell if you are toxically pessimistic: Do you tend to focus on the bad instead of the good? Do you expect things to suck? Do you often complain?

What to do if you are toxically pessimistic: State five things you are grateful for in this moment.

How to handle a toxically pessimistic person in your life: Validate their feelings of pain and despair, but don’t accept their negative frames. If they complain about the heat, respond with an appreciation for getting to experience the sun.

Obsession with Success

People who are toxically obsessed with success often prioritize achievement over all else.

Sleep? Who needs it when success is on the line! Relationships? They’ll only get in the way of my success! Food? Please!

These folks might even ditch their ethics to get ahead. 

How to tell if you are toxically obsessed with success:  Is success the most important thing in your life? Does it cause your health and relationships to suffer? Are you unhappy?

What to do if you are toxically obsessed with success: Take a weekend to yourself where you are not allowed to pursue any goals.

How to handle a person who is toxically obsessed with success in your life: Either connect with them to stoke your own ambition in a healthy way or try inviting them to hang out through leisure activities.

Stubbornness

Toxically stubborn individuals consistently refuse to consider alternative viewpoints or adapt their stance, even in the face of compelling evidence.

These people are a nightmare to get into an argument with. When you’re in conflict with a toxically stubborn person, good luck feeling heard. It’ll be like pushing against a tree.  

How to tell if you are toxically stubborn: Do you rarely change your mind? Is “conflict” something that you can either win or lose? 

What to do if you are toxically stubborn: The next time you are in a debate or emotional conflict, make it a point to explain to the other person what you think their perspective and experience are.

How to handle a toxically stubborn person in your life: Don’t try to battle stubborn people. Instead, try to offer empathy to make them feel heard. Once they are heard, they may get out of battle mode to hear you back.

Toxic martyrs believe that they must suffer for others’ good. They get self-worth out of the belief that everyone else needs them.

Toxic martyrs start to seek out suffering because they’ve learned to equate suffering and sacrifice with self-worth.

How to tell if you are a toxic martyr: Do you take pride in your sacrifices? Do you rely on your suffering for meaning? Do you feel constantly underappreciated?

What to do if you are a toxic martyr: Try embracing the perspective that you can achieve positive results and help people through joy, pleasure, and fun.

How to handle a toxic martyr: If someone is clearly trying to sacrifice themselves for you in a way you don’t want, let them know. Appreciate their efforts, but tell them that you don’t need them to suffer for you.

Toxically aloof people maintain an emotional distance.

They always seem disinterested or detached. You can never feel too close to them.

And if you have a toxically aloof person in your life, you’ll probably feel constantly undervalued by them.

How to tell if you are toxically aloof: Does vulnerability terrify you? Do you keep people at arm’s length? Do you rarely show interest in others?

What to do if you are toxically aloof: The next time you meet with someone, challenge yourself to show interest, curiosity, and engagement in their life.

How to handle a toxically aloof person in your life: Don’t rely on them for emotional support or expect deep intimacy. However, if you really need a change, ask if they’d be willing to show more interest.

Frequently Asked Questions on Toxic Personality Traits

To fix toxic traits, one must first acknowledge and take responsibility for their harmful behaviors, often requiring self-reflection and, if necessary, professional help to address and modify them. Then, take on a growth mindset where you build your self-awareness, cultivate empathy, and slowly shift your habits.

Common toxic traits include habitual dishonesty, manipulative behaviors, constant negativity, lack of empathy, and an inability to respect boundaries. These traits can lead to a destructive impact on relationships and personal well-being.

Examples of a toxic person might include someone who is consistently judgmental, overly critical, manipulative, and unwilling to consider others’ feelings or perspectives. They often create a negative and draining environment for those around them.

Takeaways on Toxic Personality Traits

There are a ton of ways to be toxic!

Hopefully, you have a better sense of how to understand if you or others in your life are showing toxic behavior.

If you’d like to dig even deeper into this topic, check out this article on The 7 Types of Toxic People and How to Spot Them.

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• Writing Tips

How to Write a Descriptive Paragraph About a Person (With Examples)

4-minute read

• 7th January 2023

Describing a person or character is difficult for even the most successful authors. It requires a balance of words to make sure they shine through without the language being too heavy. In this article, we’ll look at how to write a descriptive paragraph about a person, share some examples, and talk about different strategies.

1.   Brainstorm Your Ideas

Brainstorming is crucial to any writing process. It’s the process in which you think of ideas for what you’d like to write about. In this case, you’re writing a descriptive paragraph about a person. It’s important to use adjectives to describe the features or characteristics you want to focus on.

One way to come up with ideas for a descriptive paragraph about a person is to go through the five senses. Use the questions below to get some ideas for what you want to highlight about your person.

Appeal to your reader’s senses – smell, taste, sound, sight, and touch

Smell: How does the person smell? Do they wear perfume? Are they doing an activity that would make them have a certain smell?

Taste: Do you associate a certain food with this person? Does it make you think of a specific taste? Can you taste something due to a certain smell they have?

Sound: Do they have a unique voice or laugh? Are they doing an activity that has distinctive sounds?

Sight: What prominent features do they have? For example, think about their dressing style, their smile, or their surroundings. What do you see them doing in your mind when you see a photo of them? What memories do you have of this person? Does this person remind you of something or someone?

Touch: What textures do you see? For example, imagine their skin or clothing. How does it feel if you hug them?

2.   Begin With a Short and Snappy Sentence

Like with any type of writing, you want to hook your reader so that they want to continue reading. In this case, you can use a topic sentence, if appropriate, to introduce your reader to the person. For example:

Or, if you want to be more creative, you can reel them in with a short and snappy sentence about this person. This is called a writing hook . This sentence should focus on a stand-out detail or characteristic about the person you’re describing. For example:

3.   Describe the Person

Now, this is the hard part. But, if you’ve brainstormed plenty of ideas and know which ones you want to focus on, it will be easier. Let’s look at some examples to get a better idea of how to write a descriptive paragraph about a person using the prompt “describe a person you admire.”

Comments: This paragraph is pretty typical of most students. It gives lots of visual details of the person and uses a simile or two (“ Her eyes are like the color of honey” and “Her smile shines like the sun” ). While this strategy gets the job done, it’s not very exciting to read. In fact, it can be quite boring!

Let’s look at how we can rewrite this to make it more exciting.

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Comments: In this example, we focused on one defining characteristic of the person we are describing — her laugh. This strategy places more focus on the person you’re describing, rather than the adjectives you use to describe them.

4.   Edit and Revise

After you write your descriptive paragraph, be sure to read it over. Read it out loud. Read it in a funny voice. Doing this will help you to hear the words and identify which parts do not work or sound awkward.

5.   General Tips for Descriptive Writing

●  Avoid using too many descriptive words.

●  Remember to show the reader, not tell.

●  Appeal to the reader’s five senses – smell, touch, taste, sight, and sound.

●  Focus on a striking or defining characteristic.

●  Use contrasting details from other people or surroundings for emphasis.

●  Use literary devices (metaphors, similes etc.) sparingly and with intention.

●  Use a hook to reel your reader in.

●  Use a variety of short and long sentences.

●  Practice creative writing exercises to improve your descriptive writing skills.

●  Always edit and revise your writing.

If you need more help with writing a descriptive paragraph or essay , send your work to us! Our experts will proofread your first 500 words for free !

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11 telltale signs you're dealing with a toxic person.

The term "toxic" gets thrown around a lot these days—but what does it actually mean? Odds are, you've met a toxic person or two throughout your life, but sometimes they can be hard to spot. Here, we dig into what being toxic really means, signs to watch out for, and how to deal with toxic people in your life.

What does it mean to be toxic? 

Toxic people are people who cause harm to another, often through emotional manipulation, clinical psychologist  Perpetua Neo, DClinPsy, tells mbg. Some do it knowingly, such as dark personality types (your psychopaths , narcissists , sociopaths , Machiavellians, etc.), which are often correlated with toxic traits , she adds.

As licensed psychotherapist  Babita Spinelli, L.P., J.D., notes, these people can have a really negative impact on others through their behavior, whether they're attempting to manipulate someone, control them, or abuse them in any way.

"Then there's another added layer where there are those who do it sadistically to cause drama or watch someone squirm," Neo adds.

That said, some people can have toxic traits without necessarily realizing the effect they're having on other people. (We have a toxic person test , by the way, in case you're worried you might be the toxic one.)

11 toxic traits to look out for:

Emotional manipulation.

Emotional manipulation includes a whole host of behaviors and tactics, and if you get the sense you're being emotionally manipulated, you're likely dealing with a toxic person, Neo and Spinelli say.

"They'll put you down and insult you, often in a passive-aggressive or backhanded way ," Neo says. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. Maybe they make jokes about something you're sensitive about to get a rise out of you, or perhaps they withhold affection to punish you for seemingly no reason. "All they want is to make you squirm—they thrive on that," Neo says.

Any sort of dishonesty, whether it's deceit, lying, or general secrecy, is a sign of a toxic person, according to Spinelli. This one is tough, depending on how good of a liar you're dealing with, but if you catch them in a lie, especially more than once, don't take it lightly.

Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation, but it gets its own callout because it can be hard to realize when it's happening to you. Gaslighting is essentially when someone denies your reality with phrases like "you're making things up" or "you're being dramatic" when you express your thoughts and feelings. This is toxic, Neo and Spinelli agree, and can lead you to distrust your own intuition and experiences. (If you notice it's happening to you, here's how to deal with gaslighting .)

Lack of accountability

Toxic people do not want to take the blame for anything, and they'll make sure they don't. Not only do they display a lack of responsibility for their actions, Spinelli says, but they'll often deflect blame onto others.

Lack of boundaries

According to Neo, toxic people have no concept of (or respect for) boundaries . If you set a healthy, reasonable boundary, they'll trample all over it, she says, adding they'll even make it your fault for "being too sensitive" if you get upset when your boundary is crossed.

Unsupportive

Does this person support your goals and dreams? Are they happy for you when something goes right in your life? Are they interested in your wants and needs? If the answer to these questions is no, Spinelli says, that's a toxic person. Even when they do make feigned attempts at support, it can often come off as " toxic positivity ," which is essentially insincere optimism to avoid actually holding space for someone.

Energy draining

Going back to the idea of energy vampires , Neo and Spinelli agree, toxic people are an extreme drain to be around. "They are depleting and leave you feeling exhausted," Spinelli says. Neo concurs: "They create stress, depletion, and negativity to those around them."

Power dynamics

According to Spinelli, toxic people are likely to create a power dynamic. They don't want relationships with mutual respect and reciprocity but rather ones where they have the upper hand and can manipulate the people around them. (See: one-sided friendships .)

Encouraging codependency

Similar to the aforementioned power structure, toxic people will not only encourage but create a codependent dynamic , Spinelli says. If you're being gaslighted and your trust in your own self has diminished, you'll lean on this toxic person even further, Neo explains, which is exactly what they want. "They will do their ultimate best to isolate you from people in your life," she adds.

Inciting drama

Toxic people want to make you squirm. So, Neo says, don't be surprised when they can't seem to resist starting a fight. For example, they may know you have an early morning the next day and ask to do something late that night, just so you'll have to say no and set that boundary. "Then they'll tell you you're being difficult or demanding," Neo adds.

Insincere apologies

And lastly, Neo explains, the more sophisticated toxic people who know when they've done wrong (because they did it on purpose) may apologize to you. But that apology won't be sincere—"they make it all about you, and make it all your fault," she adds, with phrases like "I'm sorry you think I was wrong" or "I'm sorry if I upset you." And remember, an apology without change is manipulation in its own right. (Here's the right way to apologize , for what it's worth.)

How toxic people can negatively impact you

It goes without saying that toxic people aren't fun to be around, but the negative effect they can have on people goes deep. As Spinelli explains, these people will find ways to blame you for everything, control you , suffocate you, and invalidate you, which can lead you to abandon yourself.

Not only that, but they're energy vampires , meaning they seem to drain the very life out of you just with their presence. "They cause you a lot of distress that you may even justify because you can't understand why it's affecting you so badly," Neo notes, adding that toxic people will often make you question your sanity.

When a toxic person has a hold on you, you'll find yourself accommodating them, making poor choices, and getting caught in drama. This all leads to an overall diminishing of self-esteem and self-worth, and even anxiety and depression, says Spinelli.

How to deal with toxic people

So, what can be done about these toxic people? Neo suggests ignoring them if possible—and certainly get out if you're in a relationship with them (romantic or not). "If the toxic relationship demonstrates one-sidedness," Spinelli adds, "it's time to distance yourself or cut it off."

Of course, sometimes we can't avoid certain people, whether they be toxic family members or co-workers. In that case, it's important to know your boundaries and stick to them, Spinelli says. As Neo adds, sometimes we don't realize we are indeed allowed to set firm boundaries. If you struggle with this, she suggests planning a "script" of sorts, planning out exactly what you want to say before you have to say it.

Both Neo and Spinelli explain that when dealing with toxic people, we have to know what we're dealing with and respond as such. Neo calls it the "law of the jungle," basically saying you wouldn't go into a jungle without being properly equipped to protect yourself. So, don't be afraid to do just that.

"This doesn't mean you are not a compassionate person," Spinelli adds. "It means you are taking care of yourself and ensuring self-preservation." And as Neo notes, defending yourself is not the same as provoking another, and "you can retain your kindest, most loving self for those who deserve it."

Last but certainly not least, Neo also suggests doing some trauma work , because toxic people will know how to hit you where it hurts. "Make sure you heal the trauma, respond wisely, and you are strategic," she says, so that they can't trigger you.

The takeaway

Sometimes it can be hard to admit to ourselves when a close person in our lives is toxic. We don't want to believe it, and we want to give them the benefit of the doubt. But if any of these signs and behaviors have left you unsettled, there's a very good chance you're dealing with a toxic person.

No one deserves to be emotionally manipulated or abused in any way, so when it comes down to it, your best bet is to maintain as much distance as possible.

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Signs of Pessimism and How to Respond

• Living With

Pessimism is not a mental illness, but a personality trait in which someone has a more negative—or some might say, realistic—view of life. A pessimist usually expects unfavorable outcomes and is suspicious when things seem to be going well.

Pessimism is not a trait most people aspire to. It's associated with negativity, a "glass half-full" attitude, depression, and other mood disorders . However, a healthy dose of negative thinking isn't necessarily all bad.

While we're often told to smile, think of the bright side, and make lemonade from lemons, that's not always practical, advisable, or healthy. In fact, sometimes a little pessimism might actually be a good thing.

Pessimism vs. Optimism

Pessimism is the opposite of optimism . While someone with pessimism often has a negative view of life, someone with optimism sees things from a positive point of view—tending to look at the benefits of things versus focusing on their disadvantages.

For example, someone with pessimism may look at a rainy day and think of how it has ruined their plans or how miserable they will be when they get wet. Someone with optimism would look at the same rainy day and think of how the water will be good for the flowers or be excited that they may see a rainbow.

Pessimists expect bad things to happen and tend to look at the downside of things while optimists expect good things to happen and look for the silver lining when life doesn't go their way.

Which One Are You? Take the Quiz

Try our fast and free test to find out if you are more of an optimist, pessimist, or somewhere in between.

The Pessimism-Optimism Spectrum

Psychologists view pessimism and optimism as being on a line. At one end of the line lies a pure pessimist, who may believe that life has no meaning or purpose ( nihilism ) or have a lot of cynicism. At the other end is the pure optimist, who might be so positive that they are detached from reality.

Most people lie somewhere in the middle of the pessimism-optimism spectrum. Everyone has their ups and downs, when their way of thinking is more negative or positive. Life circumstances and the effects of time and experience also impact our relative pessimism or optimism.

People can be more optimistic about one area of life and less optimistic about another. However, one's way of thinking usually leans toward one end of the spectrum. This results in a personality that is more or less pessimistic.

Signs of Pessimism

How can you tell if you or someone you know may be a pessimistic person? Signs of pessimism include:

• You feel surprised when things actually work out.
• You don't go after what you want because you think you will probably fail.
• You tend to focus on what can go wrong in a situation.
• You think that the risks almost always outweigh the benefits.
• You experience imposter syndrome and undervalue your abilities.
• You tend to concentrate on your flaws or weaknesses rather than your strengths.
• You often feel annoyed by people with an optimistic demeanor.
• You often engage in negative self-talk .
• You assume that all good things will eventually come to an end.
• You find it easier to live with the status quo than change things for the better.

While you may not experience all of these signs of pessimism or think this way all the time, pessimists tend to engage in many of these types of thinking to some degree.

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Causes of Pessimism

There are many reasons why certain people might end up with a more pessimistic personality. They include:

• Family dynamics
• Past experiences
• Social and environmental factors

One study of 5,187 teenage twins and their siblings suggests that genetics may account for one-third of the variance in whether someone leans toward pessimism vs. optimism, with the remaining variance due to their environment.

One key difference between how an optimist and a pessimist thinks has to do with their explanatory style . This is is the way in which people interpret or explain what happens in their lives.

For example, if someone with pessimism does poorly on a test, they may interpret this negative result as a personal shortcoming or that they aren't intelligent. Someone with optimism may attribute low test scores to simply being tired that day or it being a difficult test.

Impact of Pessimism

Those with more pessimistic outlooks tend to have less social support, lower resilience, a reduced ability to cope with stress, and a greater propensity for depression and anxiety disorders . Having a tendency toward pessimism can also impact your outlook on life.

A pessimist will often downplay the positives in a situation while heightening their focus on the negative. An optimist will do the opposite, magnifying positive events while minimizing the negatives in a situation.

The tendency to minimize the negative—one trait that encourages optimists to dream big and keep trying even after setbacks—can produce a false sense of security that leads to a failure to conceive and plan for possible difficulties. It may also cause an optimist to feel surprised when things don’t go their way.

At the same time, minimizing the negative and maximizing the positive can help an optimist through the same tough times that could send a pessimist to a darker, more helpless place.

An optimist may seek new solutions instead of dwelling on problems. They’ll often have hope for the future and the coping skills to get through hard times, setting them up to turn a negative situation into a positive one.

Numerous studies suggest that it's more important for good health to be less pessimistic than more optimistic. In other words, you don't need to be overly cheery to reap the benefits of not being overly negative. Limiting the negative health impact of overly pessimistic thoughts appears to have more effect than purely positive thinking .

Benefits of Pessimism

While the factors that contribute to pessimism are mostly negative, pessimism does have an upside. In fact, there can be some real benefits to a healthy dose of pessimism.

Pessimists are often better prepared for tough times and may avoid risks that more optimistic thinkers might ignore. Research has shown that pessimists tend to foresee obstacles more readily since they expect things to go wrong, meaning that they are more likely to plan for difficulties.

For example, one 2013 study published in the Journal of Research in Personality found that negative thinkers are more likely to build safety nets. They're also more prepared practically and emotionally when things go wrong and don’t find their worldviews in crisis when bad things do happen.

Another 2013 study, this one in Psychology and Aging, found a correlation between underestimating future life satisfaction with positive health outcomes and longevity in older adults. In other words, the study found that thinking your life would not go well was linked with some health benefits.

Pessimism can be a positive or a negative, having both types of impacts on one's life.

Risks of Pessimism

There are several clear drawbacks of too much pessimism. Some of the major pitfalls of being overly pessimistic are:

• Dwelling on negative thoughts is bad for well-being . Studies suggest that women may have higher rates of depression because they have higher rates of rumination , brooding, and reflection. Rumination and brooding are both components of pessimistic thinking.
• Overly negative thinking contributes to depression and anxiety . Key symptoms of anxiety disorders are excessive worry, rumination, and worst-case scenario thinking. Likewise, low mood, negative thoughts, low self-esteem, and worry are not only characteristics of pessimistic thinkers, but also factors in depression.
• Pessimism contributes to negative health effects . A negative outlook is associated with a number of other heightened health risks, such as heart disease and overall mortality.
• Pessimists tend to have greater stress and fewer coping skills . One study showed that in older people, pessimism was correlated with higher stress levels, more focus on the less positive parts of their life, and a greater tendency to look back on life with more negativity in general, reducing life satisfaction.

Pessimistic people tend to experience more isolation, greater conflict and stress, poorer health, and reduced well-being . Conversely, optimists experience healthier stress levels and a higher perception of life satisfaction.

A 2015 study found that "higher optimism was associated with better physiological adjustment to a stressful situation, while higher pessimism was associated with worse psychological adjustment to stress."

Another worrisome component of pessimism is that it may make stressful situations feel worse than they actually are. On the other hand, more optimistic thinking can help significantly when coping with challenging events.

Benefits and Drawbacks of Optimism

One of the biggest risks of being a pessimist is not being an optimist. Significant scientific research has found that optimists tend to be healthier, happier, more successful (financially, socially, and in many other ways), and enjoy stronger and more satisfying relationships.

But living on the bright side isn't always sunny. Drawbacks of optimism include a greater propensity for taking unwarranted risks in terms of personal health and safety—such as not buckling a seatbelt or not getting a vaccine—or in finances, such as investing in a risky business venture.

Even when considering the possible drawbacks, the benefits of optimism are huge.

• Positive thinking is correlated with greater relationship satisfaction in dating couples.
• Greater optimism is also related to an increased likelihood of seeking out social support in times of stress and hardship, along with lower levels of interpersonal conflicts.
• Higher levels of optimism in married couples are correlated with better health as studies have shown that one partner's level of optimism plays a role in promoting the health of both partners.
• Optimism is associated with warmer, more outgoing personality types, and pessimism is associated with more hostile and submissive interpersonal styles.
• Research has linked optimism to increased longevity.
• Optimism is also associated with greater life satisfaction, coping skills, social support, and resilience .

Pessimists may be less surprised when crises occur, but optimists don’t stay in negative situations for as long since they tend to focus on finding solutions rather than ruminating about what went wrong.

Living With Pessimism

How can you stay optimistic without missing opportunities to keep yourself prepared for crises? There are a number of steps you can take.

Hope for the Best, Plan for the Worst

The approach of hoping for the best and planning for the worst allows you to enjoy the many benefits of optimism without leaving yourself vulnerable and unprepared. To get the benefits that pessimism has to offer, think about the things that can possibly go wrong and create backup plans and contingencies for dealing with the unexpected. Then, focus on the positives while keeping these backup plans in mind.

Remember What’s Important

Savor and remember what you have and aim to cultivate gratitude . Stress results when we feel that the demands of a situation exceed our resources to handle them. So, make time to take inventory of your strengths and resources.

Keeping your available resources in mind can reduce stress and help you feel empowered as you move through life. This way of thinking can really help when you’re facing a crisis.

Practicing mindfulness is another helpful strategy. Mindfulness is a technique that involves focusing on the here and now rather than worrying about the past and future.

Remember That Whatever You Face Will Pass

Positive psychology research has taught us that major setbacks do not cause people to feel unhappy for as long as people predict. After a few weeks or months, people who have experienced a major crisis generally return to their regular level of happiness (or unhappiness).

Optimists tend to feel happier in general, and pessimists tend to feel less happy. If you’re a pessimist, it’s always possible to learn how to become an optimist . Sometimes enduring a crisis provides you with just the right motivation to do that.

A Word From Verywell

"Making the best of things" may be a cliché, but this approach can be the key to good health, longevity, and enjoyment of life. In fact, studies show that, other than those in poverty, people with a lot of money generally aren’t happier than people with a little.

It's those who have close friends and a strong sense of community, those who feel gratitude , and those who have a sense of meaning in life who feel the happiest. The bottom line is that an overall lean toward optimism is ideal—with a bit of pessimism thrown in.

Mavioğlu RN, Boomsma DI, Bartels M. Causes of individual differences in adolescent optimism: a study of Dutch twins and their siblings . Eur Child Adolesc Psychiatry . 2015;24:1381-1388. doi:10.1007/s00787-015-0680-x

Whitfield JB, Zhu G, Landers JG, Martin NG. Pessimism is associated with greater all-cause and cardiovascular mortality, but optimism is not protective .  Sci Rep . 2020;10(1):12609. doi:10.1038/s41598-020-69388-y

Smith TW, Ruiz JM, Cundiff JM, Baron KG, Nealey-Moore JB. Optimism and pessimism in social context: An interpersonal perspective on resilience and risk . J Res Pers . 2013;47(5):553-562. doi:10.1016/j.jrp.2013.04.006

Lang FR, Weiss D, Gerstorf D, Wagner GG. Forecasting life satisfaction across adulthood: Benefits of seeing a dark future? Psychol Aging . 2013;28(1):249-61. doi:10.1037/a0030797

Johnson DP, Whisman MA. Gender differences in rumination: A meta-analysis . Pers Individ Dif . 2013;55(4):367-374. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2013.03.019

Rood L, Roelofs J, Bögels SM, Alloy LB. Dimensions of negative thinking and the relations with symptoms of depression and anxiety in children and adolescents . Cognit Ther Res . 2010;34(4):333-342. doi:10.1007/s10608-009-9261-y

National Institute of Mental Health. Depression .

Puig-Perez S, Pulopulos MM, Hidalgo V, Salvador A. Being an optimist or a pessimist and its relationship with morning cortisol release and past life review in healthy older people . Psychol Health . 2018;33(6):783-799. doi:10.1080/08870446.2017.1408807

Puig-Perez S, Villada C, Pulopulos MM, Almela M, Hidalgo V, Salvador A. Optimism and pessimism are related to different components of the stress response in healthy older people . Int J Psychophysiol. 2015;98(2 Pt 1):213-21. doi:10.1016/j.ijpsycho.2015.09.002

Kim, ES, Chopik WJ, Smith J. Are people healthier if their partners are more optimistic? The dyadic effect of optimism on health among older adults . J Psychosomatic Res. 2014;76,6:447-53. doi:10.1016/j.jpsychores.2014.03.104

Lee LO, James P, Zevon ES, et al. Optimism is associated with exceptional longevity in 2 epidemiologic cohorts of men and women . Proc Natl Acad Sci USA . 2019;116(37):18357-18362. doi:10.1073/pnas.1900712116

Mineo L. Good genes are nice, but joy is better . The Harvard Gazette .

Hecht D. The neural basis of optimism and pessimism . Exp Neurobiol . 2013;22(3):173-99. doi:10.5607/en.2013.22.3.173

Luger T, Cotter KA, Sherman AM. It's all in how you view it: Pessimism, social relations, and life satisfaction in older adults with osteoarthritis . Aging Ment Health . 2009;13(5):635-47. doi:10.1080/13607860802534633

By Elizabeth Scott, PhD Elizabeth Scott, PhD is an author, workshop leader, educator, and award-winning blogger on stress management, positive psychology, relationships, and emotional wellbeing.

Essay on Bad Qualities of a Person

Students are often asked to write an essay on Bad Qualities of a Person in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Bad Qualities of a Person

Introduction.

Bad qualities are traits that negatively impact a person’s behavior and relationships. They include dishonesty, selfishness, and laziness.

Selfishness

Selfishness is when a person only thinks about their own needs. It can cause others to feel unappreciated and neglected.

Laziness is a lack of motivation or effort. It can lead to missed opportunities and unfulfilled potential.

250 Words Essay on Bad Qualities of a Person

Every person has a unique combination of qualities, both good and bad. Recognizing the negative traits in individuals is crucial as it aids in personal development and fosters healthier relationships.

A prominent negative trait is narcissism, characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance and a lack of empathy. Narcissistic individuals often disregard others’ feelings, leading to strained relationships and a toxic environment.

Dishonesty is another detrimental quality. It erodes trust, a fundamental element in any relationship. Dishonest people often manipulate the truth for personal gain, causing harm to others in the process.

Intolerance

Intolerance, the unwillingness to accept views, beliefs, or behavior differing from one’s own, is a harmful trait. It breeds conflict and prevents the development of a diverse and inclusive society.

Understanding these negative traits can be a stepping stone towards personal growth. Awareness allows us to reflect on our actions, strive to improve, and build healthier relationships. Moreover, it can foster a more empathetic and tolerant society.

500 Words Essay on Bad Qualities of a Person

Negative traits and their implications.

One of the most harmful qualities a person can possess is dishonesty. Not only does lying erode trust in relationships, but it also damages the individual’s self-esteem and credibility. A dishonest person often finds themselves entangled in a web of their own deceit, leading to anxiety and isolation.

Another damaging trait is arrogance. Arrogant individuals often believe they are superior to others, refusing to acknowledge their mistakes or learn from them. This can hinder personal growth and create friction in relationships, as arrogance often comes across as disrespect or disregard for others.

The Impact on Personal and Professional Life

On a personal level, these traits can strain relationships and lead to loneliness. Trust, respect, and understanding are the bedrock of any healthy relationship, and these are eroded by dishonesty, arrogance, and lack of empathy.

The Role of Self-Awareness and Self-Improvement

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

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A Reflection About Myself and My Personality

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